Confused Indian Men Posting On Facebook Porn Groups Megathread

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reignofevil: Nov 7, 2008

The MSJ posted:

Sounds like horror movie premise: messages horny guy from Pakistan as a joke, turns out he's dead and now his ghost shows up in your photos.

Stealing this

# ? Aug 23, 2017 11:19

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# ? May 17, 2024 10:24

Darkest Auer: Dec 30, 2006; They're silly; Ramrod XTreme

Tsunemori posted:

To apply for any of the positions, candidates will have to go online and submit their resume to us.

These guys just email us directly, so it's not like they're relating to any of the applicants or specifically talking about anyone... just hey, you raceist fac, hire more Indians!!! Super bowl to you

i'm dying

# ? Aug 23, 2017 16:53

dragon enthusiast: Jan 1, 2010

does he think your name is Contracts lol

# ? Aug 23, 2017 17:18

nerdz: Oct 12, 2004; Complex, statistically improbable things are by their nature more difficult to explain than simple, statistically probable things.; Grimey Drawer

dragon enthusiast posted:

does he think your name is Contracts lol

It's probably an automated email sent to a shitload of company emails

# ? Aug 23, 2017 17:24

SaltyJesus: Jun 2, 2011; Arf!

Tsunemori posted:

To apply for any of the positions, candidates will have to go online and submit their resume to us.

These guys just email us directly, so it's not like they're relating to any of the applicants or specifically talking about anyone... just hey, you raceist fac, hire more Indians!!! Super bowl to you

hahaha oh my god, this is loving hilarious

# ? Aug 23, 2017 17:44

steinrokkan: Apr 2, 2011; Soiled Meat

OK, is it possible that there is perhaps an Indian agency that forwards migrant worker to Australia, and as part of their amazing plan to place as many clients as possible they are trying to gaslight Australian job agencies?

# ? Aug 23, 2017 17:54

Fleta Mcgurn: Oct 5, 2003; Porpoise noise continues.

Tsunemori, here is a test you can send those people to see if they are suitable for employment. Please post their answers:

1. How many people are in your family?

2. How many people in your family would you like to have sex with? Please list their age, weight, relationship to you, and the relative milkiness of their bobs.

3. What means sex?

4. How plumpy is Gheeta's navel if her milks have recently progressed from apples to melons?

5. Pradip is an engineer, 32, very good job and handsome. He is looking for a wife. What is the best course of action?
A: Pradip very bad boy he should think more his job
B: He should go on Facebook and send sexy messages like "hi" and "do u love me" to every female he can find until one of them acquiesces.
C: Cry forever.

6. How would you do the needful? HINT: Show your work

7. What does the word "lasagna" mean?

8. Please explain the difference, in 500 words or less, between "fap" and "shag".

# ? Aug 23, 2017 18:56

Seth Pecksniff: May 27, 2004; can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.

Say Nothing posted:

Posting the needful.

holy poo poo how do you get into a flamewar with an indian dude asking for sex and boobs and lose

# ? Aug 23, 2017 22:28

Dr.Caligari: May 5, 2005; "Here's a big, beautiful avatar for someone"

I would blow Dane Cook posted:

Does it work like in Beetlejuice where you could be tricked into saying the words three times?

# ? Aug 23, 2017 23:41

Cum Galleon: Oct 16, 2004; Your shipment has arrived.

Ron Darling posted:

holy poo poo how do you get into a flamewar with an indian dude asking for sex and boobs and lose

I can't stop thinking about 'I want to gently caress she'. It really makes me laugh for some reason. It's not even that bad a translation error.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 00:18

nerdz: Oct 12, 2004; Complex, statistically improbable things are by their nature more difficult to explain than simple, statistically probable things.; Grimey Drawer

Cum Galleon posted:

I can't stop thinking about 'I want to gently caress she'. It really makes me laugh for some reason. It's not even that bad a translation error.

I want to frnd request he

# ? Aug 24, 2017 03:47

Vincent Van Goatse: Nov 8, 2006; Enjoy every sandwich.; Smellrose

nerdz posted:

I want to frnd request he

I friend you OK

rape you later

# ? Aug 24, 2017 03:48

Sydney Bottocks: Oct 15, 2004; Can't post for 11 days!

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

I friend you OK

rape you later

He sex now but now not girl his inbox

# ? Aug 24, 2017 04:21

Tsunemori: Nov 20, 2006; HEEEYYYWHOOOHHH

Whoever said gaslighting is probably right

quote:

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: "Amar Ahuja" <ggrissabi@tet.com.au>
Date: 24 Jul 2017 6:04 pm
Subject: what a pitty Contracts I am so disappointed
To: <Contracts>
Cc:

Contracts,

Many my friends are submitting applications to you, many of them are really suited for the job. They never got answers.

Is it because my friends are from an India background? I've heard of terrible things you Australians are doing to us.

Listen Contracts why are you still living in the past? Don't you know that it is NOT legal to be racially biased?

Can you please just give us a chance, we do more and ask for less, and why are u still hiring locals??

drat this is really hard

# ? Aug 24, 2017 12:32

unpacked robinhood: Feb 18, 2013; by Fluffdaddy

Tsunemori posted:

Whoever said gaslighting is probably right

Can you tell him you're already screening many promising applications from Pakistanis

# ? Aug 24, 2017 12:38

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

Ron Darling posted:

holy poo poo how do you get into a flamewar with an indian dude asking for sex and boobs and lose

well it aint like the indian dude won but he's in his natural state so

# ? Aug 24, 2017 13:09

haljordan: Oct 22, 2004; the corpse of god is love.

That Contracts guy seems like a real ayehole

# ? Aug 24, 2017 13:17

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

DynamiteSurprise posted:

I feel like H Jon Benjamin's voice acting fell flat on Bobs Lasagna

# ? Aug 24, 2017 13:34

Vincent Van Goatse: Nov 8, 2006; Enjoy every sandwich.; Smellrose

Tsunemori posted:

Whoever said gaslighting is probably right

How do you gently caress up accusing Australians of racism this goddamn badly?

# ? Aug 24, 2017 14:58

Deceitful Penguin: Feb 16, 2011

Tsunemori posted:

Whoever said gaslighting is probably right

This is deeply hilarious to me

It's also hilarious that they talk about their good English skills, then write poo poo like that.

# ? Aug 24, 2017 14:59

nerdz: Oct 12, 2004; Complex, statistically improbable things are by their nature more difficult to explain than simple, statistically probable things.; Grimey Drawer

Also openly admit they want to undercut everyone.

Really guys, we're willing to be a step above indentured servants, just hire us!

# ? Aug 24, 2017 16:31

Seth Pecksniff: May 27, 2004; can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.

Alan Smithee posted:

well it aint like the indian dude won but he's in his natural state so

i mean i'm defining "winning" as "not looking like a total chode" so in that respect somehow the indian dude came out on top imo

# ? Aug 24, 2017 17:02

Noir89: Oct 9, 2012; I made a dumdum

DynamiteSurprise posted:

This is hurting my head! :saddowns:

# ? Aug 24, 2017 23:46

putrid aidsman: Apr 13, 2017; by Lowtax

# ? Aug 25, 2017 01:58

naem: May 29, 2011

putrid aidsman posted:

I like the two of your milk

# ? Aug 25, 2017 02:08

McGavin: Sep 18, 2012

Mods, change my name to Sexual Boobs Function.

# ? Aug 25, 2017 02:08

Sydney Bottocks: Oct 15, 2004; Can't post for 11 days!

I like hot pushy big bumps and I cannot lie

# ? Aug 25, 2017 02:13

haljordan: Oct 22, 2004; the corpse of god is love.

McGavin posted:

Mods, change my name to Sexual Boobs Function.

I used to play bass for Sexual Boobs Function back in college

# ? Aug 25, 2017 02:24

ElGroucho: Nov 1, 2005; We already - What about sticking our middle fingers up... That was insane; Fun Shoe

How many of these are just you guys having fun? Open boobs lasagna, lol

# ? Aug 25, 2017 02:25

Seth Pecksniff: May 27, 2004; can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.

ElGroucho posted:

How many of these are just you guys having fun? Open boobs lasagna, lol

I think you've been around long enough to know that goons could never be this clever

# ? Aug 25, 2017 03:05

nerdz: Oct 12, 2004; Complex, statistically improbable things are by their nature more difficult to explain than simple, statistically probable things.; Grimey Drawer

# ? Aug 25, 2017 03:08

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

nerdz posted:

All of you will touch my rear end pennies

# ? Aug 25, 2017 04:05

Tsunemori: Nov 20, 2006; HEEEYYYWHOOOHHH

Story time

quote:

From: "Jhanda Patel" <enruteiapnci@qnd.com.au>
Date: 6 Aug 2017 5:39 pm
Subject: Contracts Look at history and you ku who to work with
To: <Contracts>
Cc:

Contracts,

This is a gentalman email between only you and me.

Nobody is racist these days, but we still look into histories when we make choices.

200 years ago when British setup colonies, they sent Indian troops to manage those places, from west Africa to southeast Asia. We were loyal, hardworking, always took care of dirty works, you know what I mean. The Blood of British and Indian soldiers flow together, this is what the Queen said when he visited my country.

Now many years past, but we never change. When you run your Australian business, why don't we follow tradition, and hire Indian managers to manage the place? We are loyal, hardworking, and take care of dirty works for you. We are the people your business need to conquer the planet. Let's work together and manage those Asians, Filipinos, Latinos, Africans, or even some of those helpless lazy locals who are spoiled, just like the sweet old days!

Contracts, What is your answer? The British Empire is a thing of the past, but its legacy shouldn't be forgotten. Ally with us, and we share the prosporous. I am not denying Asians, Filipinos... They are even more important, because the create value directly for your business. But we Indians are better at managing then any other, this is proven by history!

Yours most devoted honest and loyal brother,

Jhanda Patel

# ? Aug 25, 2017 04:27

Prokhor Zakharov: Dec 31, 2008; This is me as I make another great post

Good luck with your depression!

quote:

this is what the Queen said when he visited my country

A+

# ? Aug 25, 2017 04:33

Kharnifex: Sep 11, 2001; The Banter is better in AusGBS

Dame Edna, Queen of Australia.

# ? Aug 25, 2017 04:43

nerdz: Oct 12, 2004; Complex, statistically improbable things are by their nature more difficult to explain than simple, statistically probable things.; Grimey Drawer

Tsunemori posted:

Story time

Jesus

That's so absurdly racist. I wonder if there's an indian workers organization behind these emails.

# ? Aug 25, 2017 04:52

I would blow Dane Cook: Dec 26, 2008

Tsunemori posted:

Story time

Are these all coming from the same email?

# ? Aug 25, 2017 04:56

Tsunemori: Nov 20, 2006; HEEEYYYWHOOOHHH

I would blow Dane Cook posted:

Are these all coming from the same email?

No, but pretty sure they come from the same source... some random gibberish and a three-letter domain name, like knfzh@com.com.au, fswmerfmnezngl@put.com.au, ggrissabi@tet.com.au ...

# ? Aug 25, 2017 05:05

I would blow Dane Cook: Dec 26, 2008

Tsunemori posted:

No, but pretty sure they come from the same source... some random gibberish and a three-letter domain name, like knfzh@com.com.au, fswmerfmnezngl@put.com.au, ggrissabi@tet.com.au ...

Oh I thought you were changing the addresses.

# ? Aug 25, 2017 05:23

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# ? May 17, 2024 10:24

unpacked robinhood: Feb 18, 2013; by Fluffdaddy

heire me you helpless lazy racitst

# ? Aug 25, 2017 07:15

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