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MononcQc posted:if you're trying to emigrate anywhere -- not having a degree automatically puts you in the ´unqualified worker' bin no matter how much real world experience you have. i decided to go back to school part time and finish my bsc after being in the field for a decade for a) personal fulfillment and b) this
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Sep 11, 2017 23:44
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Helianthus Annuus posted:i wonder how much variation there is w/r/t security protocols in these piss labs. when i was younger i took a job as a home health aide at one point... one of the duties was administering meds and they had a piss test as a prerequisite. (these were nonverbal, elderly men with severe mental retardation, and apparently they'd had addicts steal the resident's pain pills) that seemed legit to me, plus i didn't smoke weed so it wasn't any skin off my back. you want some pee? i got pee for ya! but all they did was send you to a normal diagnostic lab: it actually was the same lab i went to get tests done at. so they'd just hand you a jar, send you into a bathroom, and then you came out with it chock full of piss i don't know if it's stricter for other sorts of stuff but i remember thinking how it must be comically easy to use someone else's piss.
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Sep 11, 2017 23:46
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I think the us military has someone look at your tiny sausage* while you fill the cup (*my sausage is yooooge)
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Sep 12, 2017 00:08
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there's a variety of levels of labs, some just do a paper-strip temperature check after you emerge from the back room, up through a human checking for bodily emission but again, it's not telling them anything that your daily off-hour logs and company scrip payments wouldn't reveal to the benevolent overlords anyway?
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Sep 12, 2017 00:31
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FrozenVent posted:I think the us military has someone look at your tiny sausage* while you fill the cup some jars also have temperature sensitive stripes that change color and things that are harder to fake, you at least need body temperature liquid which is hard to prepare in a random bathroom.
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Sep 12, 2017 00:33
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yeah but with a hot plate in the car and the willingness to get a minor burn on your thigh,
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Sep 12, 2017 00:42
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ThePeavstenator posted:the worst part about it was the feedback of "they're looking for someone with more positive software engineering experience" choose your language even more carefully? or don't, I get the sense that interview feedback is something you should only pay attention to if you keep getting the same feedback. one-offs could be anything and aren't worth worrying about. sucks tho, getting rejected is one of the worst feelings, just gotta power through. something will work out eventually.
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Sep 12, 2017 00:45
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I got pisstested once, for a job that required operating factory equipment and poo poo. gently caress getting pisstested for computer touching though.
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Sep 12, 2017 01:01
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re: piss testing, i think that unlike a lot of you losers, i very much value my dignity. that value is about $10^5 AnoHito fucked around with this message at 03:17 on Sep 12, 2017 |
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Sep 12, 2017 01:16
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how does a bsc in an unrelated field look?
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Sep 12, 2017 01:25
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some things I do when working with third party recruiters (oh you think you're too good for recruiters? how cute): - They want years of experience with a tech. I have been in jobs where I sometimes worked with the tech but not continuously and too long ago to recall the timeline in detail. Every year I worked with it counts as a full year. Continuous use for any substantial part year is also a full year. - They want years of experience with "A and B and C". I pick the one I have the most experience with and report that as the experience for the whole bunch. For "C/C++" I report basically my entire software career which has had me mostly developing in one or the other - They want a self-rating with a tech. Can I use it in a project without struggling? Rate 10. Have I used it in a project at all? Rate 5. Pick a point between those as needed. These are not tips, these are what I do to get my resume in front of the hiring manager rather than being shut out by an idiot headhunter who can't spell C. Gazpacho fucked around with this message at 01:54 on Sep 12, 2017 |
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Sep 12, 2017 01:49
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recruiters bad
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Sep 12, 2017 01:57
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the recruiter's goal is to screen people. your goal is to not be screened. Don't lie to a recruiter, but do exaggerate all to gently caress because the recruiter isn't the one who makes the decision you care about
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Sep 12, 2017 02:09
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MononcQc posted:From experience, not having a degree hurts when trying to get a job and go through recruiters or HR who take a degree as this has been my experience as well - i've been able to get into Product without a degree but my chances of getting a job outside Australia are basically zero unless i have an existing employer move me (hence me working for a Japanese owned company who are happy to sponsor visas anywhere they have an office). i don't think my half degree has stopped me getting anywhere so far but it would have made life a lot easier if I'd finished and given me more options if I wanted to be an engineer or whatever. JewKiller 3000 posted:here's the secret about everyone who succeeds in tech without a degree: they're all white also this
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Sep 12, 2017 02:15
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Gazpacho posted:some things I do when working with third party recruiters (oh you think you're too good for recruiters? how cute): Everyone is too good for recruiters hth dipshit
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Sep 12, 2017 02:24
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InfrastructureWeek posted:Everyone is too good for recruiters hth dipshit
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Sep 12, 2017 02:26
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"I'm emailing to let you know we'd like to give you an offer. Are you available sometime today or tomorrow to discuss it?" "sure, tell me when works for you"I get why they do this, but really.. 
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Sep 12, 2017 17:37
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Just name this "Resume (Name) (Date)" and send it: http://www.scs.stanford.edu/~dm/home/papers/remove.pdf ?
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Sep 12, 2017 18:11
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I just got a paid software engineering internship at a defense contractor last week (first "real" job) and holy hell I feel like I'm way over my head. It's a sea of acronyms and procedure and while I have a general idea of the system I'm working on, I got to look at some of the code yesterday... gently caress. Definitely a new league. I'm definitely willing to put in the effort to try to understand that poo poo and help out though because the pay is pretty great for an internship and I get my own office. It was probably one of the easiest jobs I've ever interviewed for though. Applying was literally just two clicks on my university's jobs posting page, and a few days later I got an email from their on-site HR lady asking me to come "talk to them and get to know each other" (they deliberately tried to down play that it was an interview.) The interview consisted of their HR lady, the engineering manager, and a (the?) senior software engineer. They asked about what classes I've taken, if I'm familiar with C++ or C#, where I see myself in 5 years (fuckin lol), if the defense industry interests me, if I had any personal projects, which I then geeked out over some lovely little raspberry pi based weather station piece of junk I slapped that's been collecting data since this past January. I guess they liked me enough because the next week the HR lady called and said the company was offering me the position till the end of the year with the potential to have it extended if there is the need. After that it was just stacks of paperwork, a piss test, and now I'm on the pay roll. God help me.
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Sep 12, 2017 18:51
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you're an intern no one expects poo poo from you
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Sep 12, 2017 18:54
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Rex-Goliath posted:you're an intern no one expects poo poo from you
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Sep 12, 2017 19:00
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my new job has me be data science lead in big data development in a traditional machine learning shop no pressure
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Sep 12, 2017 19:00
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Boiled Water posted:my new job has me be data science lead in big data development in a traditional machine learning shop i got an email this week about a data science job up in Edinburgh
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Sep 12, 2017 19:08
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TheToxicEuphoria posted:I just got a paid software engineering internship at a defense contractor last week (first "real" job) and holy hell I feel like I'm way over my head. It's a sea of acronyms and procedure and while I have a general idea of the system I'm working on, I got to look at some of the code yesterday... gently caress. Definitely a new league. I'm definitely willing to put in the effort to try to understand that poo poo and help out though because the pay is pretty great for an internship and I get my own office. you will be given some dumb 3 month task, your goal is to accomplish that task while asking as few stupid questions as possible. generalize whatever problems you encounter and search google/stack overflow/internal documentation (lol) for a solution before bugging anybody else, basically don't be a time sink for your host team!!. also try to be a low-intensity person who is easy to get along with instead of a socially awkward deer in headlights. do well enough at that and you'll have a job lined up after you graduate. congrats on the internship, and best of luck!
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Sep 12, 2017 19:09
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defense job though... I guess it's not a bad fall-back at least.
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Sep 12, 2017 19:10
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Rex-Goliath posted:you're an intern no one expects poo poo from you To add to this, my first manager at my internship tried to blame me for not being able to do a huge part of the project he was in charge of. Nothing happened to me and that was probably part of the reason they made him not a manager.
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Sep 12, 2017 19:13
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leper khan posted:defense job though... I guess it's not a bad fall-back at least. given the demographics of the average computer toucher team lead and hiring manager in the United States it will probably help career wise also the DoD uses a lot of acronyms? 
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Sep 12, 2017 19:20
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ThePeavstenator posted:To add to this, my first manager at my internship tried to blame me for not being able to do a huge part of the project he was in charge of. lmao imagine your life falling apart so thoroughly that you try to blame an intern for anything beyond the coffee pot being empty
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Sep 12, 2017 19:54
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Rex-Goliath posted:lmao imagine your life falling apart so thoroughly that you try to blame an intern for anything beyond the coffee pot being empty interns are really good at clearing out the snack drawer. haven't run into issues with coffee, but we have the single-serve packets. I think our snack budget doubles when we have interns. The admin people get really upset about it. 
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Sep 12, 2017 19:59
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basically show up in the morning while knowing how to shower and dress yourself and you're doing fine. if you manage to actually accomplish something, anything, they'll be floored.
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Sep 12, 2017 19:59
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leper khan posted:interns are really good at clearing out the snack drawer. haven't run into issues with coffee, but we have the single-serve packets. Had a new guy at the office when some fancy drink pod machine gets installed. Everyone loves the hazelnut caramel or whatever it was. A week or so later the office IM is lighting up like "hey where are all the hazelnut caramel pods?" New guy: if you want some come see me  Thinking WTF I go over to see the new guy, and he has literally taken EVERY SINGLE ONE of the pods and filled his bottom desk drawer with them. Had an earnest chat with the guy and he apparently loves them too and didn't want to risk going without and they're free aren't they so he just helped himself to every single one of them. But there's no problem because if someone wants one he'll do them a solid and give them one if, just come see him right?!?!?!? loving only child is my guess e: testing whether you're a culture fit for the office should consist of role playing that scenario or something like it The Eyes Have It fucked around with this message at 20:30 on Sep 12, 2017 |
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Sep 12, 2017 20:27
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ask a lot of questions if you want to get anything out (like a job) of the internship. obviously not stupid ones, and learn from the answers -- but ask and participate otherwise you're gonna get nothin out of it correct that no one expects you to accomplish anything, internships are a cross between charity for young people, recruiting screens and maybe even a way to get get that sorta-nice-to-have project no one has bothered to do done
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Sep 12, 2017 20:28
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Sapozhnik posted:you will be given some dumb 3 month task, your goal is to accomplish that task while asking as few stupid questions as possible. generalize whatever problems you encounter and search google/stack overflow/internal documentation (lol) for a solution before bugging anybody else, basically don't be a time sink for your host team!!. also try to be a low-intensity person who is easy to get along with instead of a socially awkward deer in headlights. InfrastructureWeek posted:ask a lot of questions if you want to get anything out (like a job) of the internship. obviously not stupid ones, and learn from the answers -- but ask and participate otherwise you're gonna get nothin out of it these are very correct posts be nice to work with, do what you can on your own but don't be afraid to ask questions as long as you've tried (like, at least a google or two) to answer them yourself, and don't cause HR problems for your manager*. if you can do all that, you're good. finishing your project is nice too if you can manage it *: had an intern a while back who kept badly loving up/completely forgetting his timesheets (after repeatedly being asked to stop doing that and given training on how to do it right) so i had to go fix them manually after getting a nastygram from HR every pay period. don't be like that guy
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Sep 12, 2017 20:55
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Mister Sinewave posted:Had a new guy at the office when some fancy drink pod machine gets installed. Everyone loves the hazelnut caramel or whatever it was. i'm an only child and i don't even like taking the last item of food, that guy's just a dumbass shitlord
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Sep 12, 2017 21:13
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havent heard a peep posted:Just did a piss test for my new second job. That's right I work for two different companies thus I am better than you. quit hogging all the jobs you selfish rear end in a top hat
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Sep 12, 2017 21:31
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Rex-Goliath posted:lmao imagine your life falling apart so thoroughly that you try to blame an intern for anything beyond the coffee pot being empty I should also add that I was literally the only software guy on the project. My manager was a mechanical engineer with a masters degree and he tried to blame the kid halfway through college.
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Sep 12, 2017 22:09
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poty posted:quit hogging all the jobs you selfish rear end in a top hat 
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Sep 12, 2017 22:23
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Farmer Crack-rear end posted:i'm an only child and i don't even like taking the last item of food, that guy's just a dumbass shitlord Come to think of it hoarding communal good poo poo into your personal stash is a tons-o-siblings survival move too so after careful thought I'm more in favor of your analysis.
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Sep 12, 2017 23:38
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Rex-Goliath posted:you're an intern no one expects poo poo from you I was at work for 2.5 hours today and the only other person I even SAW was some new chick who popped in my office for about 60 seconds to introduce herself. fuckin lol
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Sep 13, 2017 01:51
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My team at Amazon had an intern once and she was put on a project to develop some kind of internal web thingy and we actually needed (no freeloaders at Amazon). She demonstrated it and it looked OK but nobody thought to have her check in the code or otherwise hand it off. When this came up in status meeting I suggested getting the code from ReviewBoard but I don't know if anyone ever actually did because I had my own poo poo to shovel. that's my intern story
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Sep 13, 2017 01:57
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