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Creepy guy in DMV lineup: *clicks tongs twice* |
# ? Sep 12, 2017 00:39 |
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# ? May 15, 2024 02:47 |
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Some joke fragments that I need to get out of my brain: 1. Former comedian and living fart sound, Jamie Kennedy 2. "Excuse me, garcon, what is in the butter chicken?" 3. As a sign of my moral seriousness and deep political wisdom, I'm going to be making GBS threads up twitter all night Thank you. |
# ? Sep 12, 2017 00:47 |
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ShinyBirdTeeth posted:Some joke fragments that I need to get out of my brain: Tbf the butter chicken COULD contain things other than butter and chicken. I do like "living fart sound" though and might have to steal it for my own common speech. Here's a joke I came up with ages ago that people where I come from appreciate. What's Will Smith's favorite convenience store? The Wa Wa West Starman Super DX fucked around with this message at 03:36 on Sep 12, 2017 Tell me more! |
# ? Sep 12, 2017 01:24 |
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Starman Super DX posted:What's Will Smith's favorite convenient store? I got a good chuckle out of that. Thank you |
# ? Sep 12, 2017 03:31 |
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I never really thought about it before, but now that I've seen it written in sidewalk chalk outside the Dennys, 9/11 totally was an inside job. |
# ? Sep 12, 2017 06:37 |
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This is dumb but I'm a weirdo who likes this sorta thing so Playing Nioh and I kill a guy, he drops something that's labeled "Boss' Room Key". This makes sense given the game's realistic context, but it's funny because in a typical game it would be the "Boss-Room Key" Link gets the Boss' Room Key. Opens door and quickly slams it out of embarrassment as Ganondorf is changing. "JESUS CHRIST I KEEP IT LOCKED FOR A REASON!" ShinyBirdTeeth posted:I got a good chuckle out of that. Thank you you are v welcome! Tell me more! |
# ? Sep 12, 2017 20:14 |
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A thread about spry 70-year olds trying to raise a ruckus without missing NCIS at 4:30. |
# ? Sep 13, 2017 01:26 |
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"Are they right? Am I really that crazy for putting baskets on my head? I should just give up." - guy who invented the hat Never give up on your dreams! |
# ? Sep 13, 2017 12:34 |
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An FBI most wanted poster for cult leader "Papa" Smurf. |
# ? Sep 13, 2017 21:02 |
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# ? Sep 13, 2017 21:13 |
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I've been thinking about ordering from secret menus, and how it doesn't seem that secretive. Like, maybe there is no "secret menu", and you're just ordering off-menu. Like, the restaurant or whatever has a lot of ingredients, and they can make stuff with that, and they want to sell to you; and that's not necessarily a secret, I feel. Like, you don't have to do a secret knock to make someone put a pickle in your blt, you just ask for it.
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# ? Sep 13, 2017 21:20 |
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A thread of secret menu items for very high-end restaurants. Diamond dusted steak. Filigree Filet. Scrambled Fabergè eggs. |
# ? Sep 13, 2017 23:41 |
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DavidAlltheTime posted:A thread of secret menu items for very high-end restaurants. Gold leaf lettuce Platinum blonde ale Kobe kief |
# ? Sep 13, 2017 23:55 |
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Bread Rollex's Lamborschtginis. |
# ? Sep 14, 2017 00:00 |
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At a very fancy restaurant, trying to impress my date, "I'd like to go off menu tonight. What do you have in hot dogs?" |
# ? Sep 14, 2017 00:11 |
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"If you're looking for a unique culinary experience, my dear, might I recommend the Platos del Nacho?" LATER "We'll need a magnum of pink domestic sparkling wine :slips sommelier a tenner and whispers: last year's vintage." ShinyBirdTeeth fucked around with this message at 00:15 on Sep 14, 2017 |
# ? Sep 14, 2017 00:12 |
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Olive Garden tonight! posted:beanie-weenie? i thought this was supposed to be an upscale restaurant. excuse me, waiter! an order of your finest 'beanis-weanis', please. |
# ? Sep 14, 2017 00:14 |
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12 angry men, but each character is written by a different screenwriter |
# ? Sep 14, 2017 00:24 |
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they say "dress for the job you want, not the job you have" so why did my boss get upset when i showed up to work in a stripper cop outfit?
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# ? Sep 14, 2017 01:38 |
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n/m
ghost emoji fucked around with this message at 18:39 on Jan 5, 2018 CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: |
# ? Sep 14, 2017 14:54 |
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little munchkin posted:they say "dress for the job you want, not the job you have" so why did my boss get upset when i showed up to work in a stripper cop outfit? Dressing buisiness casual to my job as a clown at the circus is how I got fired.
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# ? Sep 14, 2017 18:20 |
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Twenty Four posted:Dressing buisiness casual to my job as a clown at the circus is how I got fired. clown car carpool CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: |
# ? Sep 14, 2017 20:13 |
Plans to destroy mario | |
# ? Sep 15, 2017 00:02 |
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Razorblades on the flagpole outside a castle. or this, somehow: Mama mia!! |
# ? Sep 15, 2017 00:07 |
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DavidAlltheTime posted:Razorblades on the flagpole outside a castle. This was even better when I wasn't scrolled down far enough to see the man's torso and it was just a head on a turtle. That direct forward stare makes it almost look like it could be a fake head on a turtle float in a mardi gras parade or something.
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# ? Sep 15, 2017 02:19 |
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witch.tv Live stream your cauldron brewing techniques, news, spells, and cute familiars ---------------- |
# ? Sep 15, 2017 19:06 |
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An undercover cop who can't stop bragging about being a cop and citing his knowledge of the law |
# ? Sep 15, 2017 22:12 |
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deep dish peat moss posted:An undercover cop who can't stop bragging about being a cop and citing his knowledge of the law if Michael Scott were a secret detective Tell me more! |
# ? Sep 15, 2017 22:37 |
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adventures in the alternate universe where they DO have to tell u if theyre a cop |
# ? Sep 15, 2017 23:20 |
who let the balrogs out? i've got foes in different area codes mo' rings mo' problemz ---------------- |
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# ? Sep 16, 2017 13:59 |
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DJ Eagle Eyez in da houuuuuuse (of Elrond) |
# ? Sep 16, 2017 19:34 |
Echoes of Balrogs screaming about fight money | |
# ? Sep 16, 2017 22:49 |
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Misty Mountain House of Pancakes 50 Shades of Gandalf the Grey Lady G and the High Elf Choir High Elf Elrond is mad as hell, battle anybody fought Sauron myself, Isildur took the Ring, Dwarves can't sing, Frodo's got Sting I shoulda dropped that thing in the Cracks of Doom myself... Back to Middle Earth with this resurrection, the Valar sent you back as a divine correction, you beat that Balrog's rear end there was no question so now it's Gandalf the White mothafucka White (his staff, too) Gandalf the White mothafucka White (plus his staff, too!) https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
# ? Sep 16, 2017 23:38 |
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i'm desperate for a men's room but the first two restaurants on this pier that I tried only had bathrooms for "buoys" or "gulls" |
# ? Sep 16, 2017 23:39 |
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E: n/m
ghost emoji fucked around with this message at 07:09 on Sep 21, 2017 CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: |
# ? Sep 17, 2017 00:19 |
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ghost emoji posted:Run the Jewels to Mordor (Though I Do Not Know The Way) lol |
# ? Sep 17, 2017 01:28 |
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canyoneer posted:i'm desperate for a men's room but the first two restaurants on this pier that I tried only had bathrooms for "buoys" or "gulls" IRL, I was once in a restaurant that had restrooms labeled, "Kings" and "Queens." As a gay man, I was momentarily put off.
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# ? Sep 17, 2017 01:42 |
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Robot Made of Meat posted:IRL, I was once in a restaurant that had restrooms labeled, "Kings" and "Queens." As a gay man, I was momentarily put off. at some point I'll label the doors "FYAD" and "GBS" Tell me more! |
# ? Sep 17, 2017 03:18 |
halfway home and my palantir's still blowin' up...
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# ? Sep 17, 2017 03:20 |
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# ? May 15, 2024 02:47 |
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someone who thinks 'japanese' is spelled 'japenis' |
# ? Sep 18, 2017 23:29 |