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Laserjet 4P
Mar 28, 2005

What does it mean?
Fun Shoe

SO DEMANDING posted:

everyone always forgets to post the loadout



lockpicking tools and knife and gun and led lights, were you planning a burglary? no sir, just preparation for the rougher parts of town

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Pingiivi
Mar 26, 2010

Straight into the iris!
There was this one video of a knife/gun/edc stuff reviewer going out for a coffee with a friend. Of course he needed three different guns on him for that.

BENGHAZI 2
Oct 13, 2007

by Cyrano4747
I find the videos of dudes unpacking and showing off their edc nonsense super relaxing but also hysterical, it's weird

mandatory lesbian
Dec 18, 2012
from now on edc means exotic dildo container to me and nothing anyone says will convince me otherwise

Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.

mandatory lesbian posted:

from now on edc means exotic dildo container to me and nothing anyone says will convince me otherwise

But enough about your mom.

Inexplicable Humblebrag
Sep 20, 2003

mandatory lesbian posted:

from now on edc means exotic dildo container to me and nothing anyone says will convince me otherwise

from now on?

3D Megadoodoo
Nov 25, 2010

BENGHAZI 2 posted:

I find the videos of dudes unpacking and showing off their edc nonsense super relaxing but also hysterical, it's weird

MY NIGGA HAVE YOU TRIED SHOPPING BAG VIDEOS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RuSIizP8E8

Paladinus
Jan 11, 2014

heyHEYYYY!!!

Jerry Cotton posted:

MY NIGGA HAVE YOU TRIED SHOPPING BAG VIDEOS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RuSIizP8E8

Mongolian is a beautiful language.

3D Megadoodoo
Nov 25, 2010

Paladinus posted:

Mongolian is a beautiful language.

https://i.imgur.com/n111bEy.mp4

goethe.cx
Apr 23, 2014



:thunk:

Pingiivi
Mar 26, 2010

Straight into the iris!
Torille.

Inspector Hound
Jul 14, 2003

Jerry Cotton posted:

MY NIGGA HAVE YOU TRIED SHOPPING BAG VIDEOS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RuSIizP8E8

This is loving vintage internet right here

Just an old guy putting away groceries in his terrifying apartment and going on and on in a language I'll never understand

CaptainSarcastic
Jul 6, 2013



Jerry Cotton posted:

MY NIGGA HAVE YOU TRIED SHOPPING BAG VIDEOS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RuSIizP8E8

I actually managed to guess the language based off clues in the video. Holy poo poo, I am amazing.

Hogge Wild
Aug 21, 2012

by FactsAreUseless
Pillbug

CaptainSarcastic posted:

I actually managed to guess the language based off clues in the video. Holy poo poo, I am amazing.

the slanted eyes are best clue, but the yellow skin and buckteeth help also

(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)

3D Megadoodoo
Nov 25, 2010


He's probably like 35 in that video. OK 42 but he looked exactly the same in his shopping bag videos 7 years ago so :shrug:

3D Megadoodoo has a new favorite as of 22:19 on Sep 16, 2017

Scudworth
Jan 1, 2005

When life gives you lemons, you clone those lemons, and make super lemons.

Dinosaur Gum

Hogge Wild posted:

the slanted eyes are best clue, but the yellow skin and buckteeth help also

The gently caress is wrong with you

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

Scudworth posted:

The gently caress is wrong with you
He's bored and wants attention.

Absurd Alhazred
Mar 27, 2010

by Athanatos

Scudworth posted:

The gently caress is wrong with you

Famous shitposter gone - HOGGE WILD

Vladimir Poutine
Aug 13, 2012
:madmax:

Jerry Cotton posted:

MY NIGGA HAVE YOU TRIED SHOPPING BAG VIDEOS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RuSIizP8E8

His bizarre apartment reminds me of the weird Finnish VCR collector guy who just has a pile of computer parts in his sink https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oWuyrlXI7nA

Tho let's not overlook his magnum opus https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-z4iw8Ppo1o

Paladinus
Jan 11, 2014

heyHEYYYY!!!

Scudworth posted:

The gently caress is wrong with you

He's Finnish.

mind the walrus
Sep 22, 2006

Tardcore posted:

This dude thought half life was real
Getting way more of a Deus Ex vibe plus :smug: about how much better Deus Ex was than Half-Life, but same difference.

the old ceremony
Aug 1, 2017

by FactsAreUseless

Paladinus posted:

He's Finnish.

the old ceremony
Aug 1, 2017

by FactsAreUseless
the finns are dangerous because they couple the malevolence of russians with the otherworldly capriciousness of swedes

SaltyJesus
Jun 2, 2011

Arf!

the old ceremony posted:

the finns are dangerous because they couple the malevolence of russians with the otherworldly capriciousness of swedes

3D Megadoodoo
Nov 25, 2010

the old ceremony posted:

the finns are dangerous because they couple the malevolence of russians with the otherworldly capriciousness of swedes

haritsoppa!

lollontee
Nov 4, 2014
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!

the old ceremony posted:

the finns are dangerous because they couple the malevolence of russians with the otherworldly capriciousness of swedes

the wandering jew of the north, except absolutely no one has the obligation to like him

du -hast
Mar 12, 2003

BEHEAD THOSE WHO INSULT GENTOO

Hogge Wild posted:

the slanted eyes are best clue, but the yellow skin and buckteeth help also

(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)

:ohdear:

Inexplicable Humblebrag
Sep 20, 2003

the dude has serious problems about taking internet forums seriously, but banning finns for mentioning finnish stereotypes is classic forums administration

steinrokkan
Apr 2, 2011



Soiled Meat
dont expect everybody to be up to date with the latest finn mocking trends, or you'll get burned

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.
The Finno-Korean hyperwar left deep cultural scars.

Osama Dozen-Dongs
Nov 29, 2014
Only guy banned for anti-Finnish posting ITT: a Finn

Should'a left the racism to the whites I guess

Hogge Wild
Aug 21, 2012

by FactsAreUseless
Pillbug
it's time we got our own subforum like the black people, so that whites couldn't oppress us all the time

lollontee
Nov 4, 2014
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!

Hogge Wild posted:

it's time we got our own subforum like the black people, so that whites couldn't oppress us all the time

we need a safe space for finnish jokes and fascism

Solice Kirsk
Jun 1, 2004

.

lollontee posted:

we need a safe space for finnish jokes and fascism

We could call it The Finnish Line!

LITERALLY A BIRD
Sep 27, 2008

I knew you were trouble
when you flew in

This is a polite reminder that PYF is not the place to make racially-charged jokes. Whether or not Hogge Wild is of an ethnicity that would make that sort of joke "okay" is not really a factor, because many people reading his post would have no possible way to know that, and allowing something that appears so overtly racist to have a home in this subforum indicates the administration will tolerate offensive and/or racist stereotypes.

And, obviously, we won't.

While Emmy was the one to put the ban through, if any of you continue to take issue with it please direct your PMs to me. He and I are on the same page about this and I'm not interested in having him take flak for such a silly reason.

lollontee
Nov 4, 2014
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!
It's verboten

lollontee
Nov 4, 2014
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!
sorry, i just need to point out that it's unironically not ok to make ricially charged "jokes" :airquotes: here. Cheers

Who What Now
Sep 10, 2006

by Azathoth
The saga is coming from inside the thread!

LITERALLY A BIRD
Sep 27, 2008

I knew you were trouble
when you flew in

Let's move on. :) Back in 2009 a goon came across a self-published book called HORRORS, published in 1991 by a young man named Ben Biddick at age 13. It included such tales as THE HORRID REFLECTION, quoted below in its entirety:

quote:

I stepped from the shadow. The sound had come again. I was in the alley off 42nd Street in New York. My hand shook slightly with the loaded Beretta in my hand. The sleek pistol was loaded and cocked, ready to fire. I am a private detective. My name is Luke Bavarious. I like this work.
People had been complaining about weird noises coming from the alley for about a year now and we finally decided to see what was going on. I was assigned to stop these noises.
I edged into the dim light. I saw a dark figure sitting on a dumpster, facing away from me. He was sobbing and crying. I raised my Beretta and lined his quivering back up with my bead.
"You there! What are you doing?" I shouted through the darkness.
"Turn around!" I shouted again.
"Beggin' your pardon, but... you don't want me to turn around," it said.
"Sure I do. I got a pistol pointed at your back so ya better," I replied.
"Okay, you asked for it," the thing mumbled as it began to turn around.
A breeze trickled through the alley as it turned and began to come toward me. I couldn't see him yet, he was shaded in the darkness.
"Step out of the dark."
It inched forward. First its combat boots. Then its legs. Then its chest. Then its head. If you call it a head. His face was horrid. There was an abundance of purple scars. There was blood leaking from an empty eye socket and he only had one shriveled ear. There was no nose. There were no lips. Only holes.
I took a step back in astonishment. I gritted my teeth to keep the vomit down.
He took three more steps forward and I saw his tears glisten in the moonlight.
"I told ya," it said.
He screamed and began to run toward me. His stub of a hand was held high in the air and was ready to commence his brutality. I pulled the trigger on my Beretta. The recoil soothed my fear as I heard a shell hit the pavement and saw the lead make another eye socket in the thing's forehead. It kept coming with the assistance of his adrenaline. It had only been a split second before I squeezed off another round into its neck. The thing was inches away as I fired point blank into the thing's throat. Two shells hit the concrete.
His hand smashed my head terribly powerful. Muscles were strained and torn as my head jerked to the side, smashing a window. I fell and landed in jagged glass. Dazed I fired again and again into the thing's chest. I felt the recoil pushing back rhythmically. Shells hitting the pavement. Bullets hitting the monster. Blood showering me. I felt my own blood from the side of my head fall and drip. I kept firing. The magazine was empty. He staggered. I tasted my tears and blood mixed into a horrid cocktail. It fell down next to me. A badge sparkled on the side of his jacket. Bavarious.
I picked up a large piece of broken glass and saw a horrid reflection. Suddenly, I was sobbing.

I highly recommend it.
https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3149605

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Snow Cone Capone
Jul 31, 2003


I never really understood what was so funny about that stuff. "lol a 13-year-old wrote some short stories and they SUCK!!!"

I guess it's a pretty good saga if you look at it from the perspective of "a bunch of goons dogpiled a 13-year-old kid's bad horror stories, to the point where they tracked down his now-older self and bought him an account for some bizarro reason"

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