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Benny Harvey posted:There's no way of cutting him out of my life without losing my circle of friends though. Beyond that, I'm a petty person who doesn't want to leave as a loser. watch The D-Train with Jack Black, this will solve any conceivable problem e: 
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Sep 24, 2017 19:26
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Sep 24, 2017 20:04
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Benny Harvey posted:There's no way of cutting him out of my life without losing my circle of friends though. Beyond that, I'm a petty person who doesn't want to leave as a loser. Your circle sounds really lovely and judgmental though. Make some new friends! And yeah I know that's easier said than done, but part of the reason people keep saying "get a hobby" is because you will almost certainly encounter new people through it. E: And you don't have to make a huge production out of breaking ties with these people. Just say "No, I can't" whenever they ask you out with them. You don't even need to give them a reason - keep saying something along the line of "I just can't make it." (Making up a scheduling conflict will probably backfire unless you're willing to commit - don't say you're going to be at the nursing home reading to old people unless you're actually willing to read to old people at the nursing home.) Eventually they'll stop asking. Pththya-lyi fucked around with this message at 20:34 on Sep 24, 2017 |
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Sep 24, 2017 20:23
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Sooo... Rape? Who here is willing to be the friend he needs that won't judge but accidentally copy/pastes the pm to his local police?
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Sep 24, 2017 20:55
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Pththya-lyi posted:Your circle sounds really lovely and judgmental though. Make some new friends! Sometimes having no friends is better than having lovely friends. Also yeah, you can usually just ghost if needed, particularly if your job needs you to be effectively on call.
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Sep 24, 2017 20:56
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the worst friends a person can have are people who are failures who feel threatened when someone else succeeds
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Sep 24, 2017 20:59
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The worst friends a person can have are people who will harvest your organs and leave you for dead
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Sep 24, 2017 21:02
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friends are cope
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Sep 24, 2017 21:03
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Fartbox posted:The worst friends a person can have are people who will harvest your organs and leave you for dead no because then you're just dead instead of a second whiny loser remembered for your crapnitude
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Sep 24, 2017 21:05
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Benny Harvey, has it been quite a few years since you gained new friends or shifted social circles? You're in your 30s, are these people you've known since HS/college age? It's actually healthy to shift friend groups now and then, as you change as a person and realize that whole groups is dumbasses (except for Jake and Cassie, they're chill, you can just keep doing stuff with them and ignore the rest). Purposefully not shifting away from buttheads for fear of what the buttheads will think is understandable, but unhealthy. Also um. There's a difference between societal pressures and someone literally forcing you to do something. Maybe think on that a little, I dunno.
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Sep 24, 2017 21:27
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Hey Benny all your friends are assholes and their dumbass view of relationships is not actually the societal default. Also they're actively making you miserable with this bullshit, to the point that you're talking about it all the time with people who are making fun of you for the dumbass view your friends are pushing onto you. What are you looking for? A reality check? Because reality check, if all your friends ditch you because you won't put up with them actively damaging you, then they were friends that were, well, actively loving up your head in a really harmful way. Don't worry about finding a girlfriend, you don't need one and it sounds like you don't really want one right now and that's fine. But I can tell you that if you don't cut these dudes out of your life, you're not going to get any happier no matter what else you do. They're emotional leeches.
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Sep 24, 2017 21:36
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Pick posted:the worst friends a person can have are people who are failures who feel threatened when someone else succeeds I'm actually a very good friend thank you. -- "Women can pick up on your negative energy. That's why women aren't attracted to you" No they picked up on my subhuman face you loving moron. Where did those negative energy detectors go when all those women hooked up with Ted Bundy?
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Sep 24, 2017 21:38
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PetraCore posted:Hey Benny all your friends are assholes so is he, it checks out
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Sep 24, 2017 21:46
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I mean Ted Bundy actually had very positive energy, in that he was charismatic and actively putting in the effort to hold good conversations with people and be charming and interested. The world would be a better place if he'd just gone online and never left his house, but the thing these incels don't seem to get is that it's not just about physical attraction, and the more successful predators work at being attractive in other ways and seeming interested and engaged in other people to better get away with stuff. It's probably a good thing some of those people don't understand that, from a future harm capacity, but it's not like Ted Bundy or Charles Manson were just pretty faces.
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Sep 24, 2017 21:48
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Bundy's the worst possible example because several women refused to go off with him specifically because of the vibe he gave off. If it were just about his looks a lot more women would be dead.
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Sep 24, 2017 22:30
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My Linux Rig posted:Incel makes important discovery: the mall is full of teenagers!! stdh Where is this magical mall that somehow is still filled with people?
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Sep 24, 2017 22:52
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Incel posted:The importance of hunter eyes
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Sep 24, 2017 23:08
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Benny Harvey posted:E: also as much as I believe I deserve a modicum of respect, that doesn't stop others from disrespecting me grow a spine you human doormat
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Sep 24, 2017 23:16
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Palpek posted:drat, the Chad water buffalo is hottt. Chad antelope looking like a creeper incel though.
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Sep 24, 2017 23:18
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Wanna pet that prey wolf
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Sep 24, 2017 23:19
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Palpek posted:drat, the Chad water buffalo is hottt. I'm diggin' the Tyrantelope (?) next to the lion with the fantastic eyeshadow
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Sep 24, 2017 23:21
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Palpek posted:drat, the Chad water buffalo is hottt. The doe-eyed predator animals are so kawaii~ :3 Incels don't know jack.
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Sep 24, 2017 23:25
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The stereotype of Chad that these incels have is basically me, but then I held a door open for a woman and she didn't suck my dick in the bathroom so I guess I'm just a normie Recommend some copes
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Sep 24, 2017 23:25
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David Heinrich posted:The stereotype of Chad that these incels have is basically me, but then I held a door open for a woman and she didn't suck my dick in the bathroom so I guess I'm just a normie do you look like your av? message me bby
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Sep 24, 2017 23:27
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David Heinrich posted:The stereotype of Chad that these incels have is basically me, but then I held a door open for a woman and she didn't suck my dick in the bathroom so I guess I'm just a normie Enjoying literally any aspect of life.
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Sep 24, 2017 23:27
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Is there a medical name for the kind of dysmorphia where you look in the mirror and see yourself looking like the elephant man?
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Sep 24, 2017 23:31
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Hunter eyes, huh... So sexy oh my god Also, that wolf looks like a very good boy.
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Sep 24, 2017 23:33
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Cantaloupe posted:do you look like your av? message me bby Unironically yes, but with black hair. ranbo das posted:Enjoying literally any aspect of life. IT'S OVER
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Sep 24, 2017 23:39
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NO gently caress YOU DAD posted:Bundy's the worst possible example because several women refused to go off with him specifically because of the vibe he gave off. If it were just about his looks a lot more women would be dead. Yeah, actually a lot of these guys had a history of creeping women out (and so they didn't go out with these guys, which turned out to be completely justified from a safety standpoint wooow)
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Sep 24, 2017 23:43
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chumbler posted:Also, Benny, nobody gives a poo poo if you're in your 30s and not in a relationship, and if they do then they are at best tactless. Nobody outside of like immediate family has the time or energy to care about other people's relationships and personal lives. Seriously, this. You don't need an "excuse" to have not ever had a relationship, nobody that's worth your time will give that much of a poo poo. When my friends used to ask me, in my mid-20's, why I hadn't had a girlfriend yet, I'd just shrug and say "I dunno, just hasn't happened yet" and they didn't probe any further because they're not garbage human beings. You're not "broken" or "weird" just for not having had a girlfriend, or even being a virgin, into your 20's or even 30's. You might be a virgin or perma-single because you're broken or weird, but it doesn't work the other way.
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Sep 25, 2017 00:13
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Pththya-lyi posted:Your circle sounds really lovely and judgmental though. Make some new friends! Fair enough but this behaviour isn't confined to my circle of friends. I'm not confident of finding a group of friends who would accept me and let's be honest, "I'm happy being single while I lose weight because I'm fussy about looks" is not a socially acceptable thing to say. hackbunny posted:grow a spine you human doormat I have one but exercising it would leave me friendless and jobless. PeteaCore, i dont know what my friends' (and others) views on relationships are beyond that it's hosed up whenever Im not in one.
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Sep 25, 2017 00:23
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Benny Harvey posted:"I'm happy being single while I lose weight because I'm fussy about looks" is not a socially acceptable thing to say. it's not? seems fine to me
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Sep 25, 2017 00:24
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Benny Harvey posted:Fair enough but this behaviour isn't confined to my circle of friends. I'm not confident of finding a group of friends who would accept me and let's be honest, "I'm happy being single while I lose weight because I'm fussy about looks" is not a socially acceptable thing to say. You need to jump into that portal out of bizarro world and back into this one, because "I'm fine with being single while I work on X thing I want to do" is generally accepted and looked on positively.
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Sep 25, 2017 00:25
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chumbler posted:You need to jump into that portal out of bizarro world and back into this one, because "I'm fine with being single while I work on X thing I want to do" is generally accepted and looked on positively.
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Sep 25, 2017 00:25
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It is an entirely acceptable thing to say
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Sep 25, 2017 00:26
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your problem is you live in the UK, a country comprised entirely of bitter sadsacks with aggravating cultural mannerisms and way too little shame in their imperialistic history, and who just voted away their ability to easily go to actually good parts of europe. maybe work on that situation? idk
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Sep 25, 2017 00:49
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Depends on how you frame it. "I may be a sad fat sack of poo poo right now but I intend to get in shape and therefore you don't meet my standards" is something best left unsaid. "I'm working on myself right now and don't want to get involved with anyone" is fine.
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Sep 25, 2017 01:00
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DragQueenofAngmar posted:your problem is you live in the UK, a country comprised entirely of bitter sadsacks with aggravating cultural mannerisms and way too little shame in their imperialistic history, and who just voted away their ability to easily go to actually good parts of europe. maybe work on that situation? idk
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Sep 25, 2017 01:00
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It's not nice to say "I only want a dime so I'm getting in shape first so I deserve one," which I think is where you're running into issues, but it's totally fine to say "I really wanna focus on self-improvement right now." Just leave off the part about what a hottie you require.
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Sep 25, 2017 01:04
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i like nice words
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DragQueenofAngmar posted:your problem is you live in the UK, a country comprised entirely of bitter sadsacks with aggravating cultural mannerisms and way too little shame in their imperialistic history, and who just voted away their ability to easily go to actually good parts of europe. maybe work on that situation? idk Right, well I'm actually Scottish, so the whole jingoistic pride in the empire doesn't apply. I also lived in Germany for 5 years (if that country feels enough shame in their history for your liking) and the social pressure there were worse if anything. As for voting away our ability to go to other parts of Europe (we didn't), I have a second EU passport. What do you mean by aggravating cultural mannerisms and where are you from if you don't mind me asking? Although I do agree that it sucks living somewhere full of jaded pricks where it pisses rain 300 days of the year. E: I've also tried saying I'm too busy with myself for a relationship but people don't believe me. Benny Harvey fucked around with this message at 01:26 on Sep 25, 2017 |
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Sep 25, 2017 01:21
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