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How many quarters after Q1 2016 till Marissa Mayer is unemployed?
1 or fewer
2
4
Her job is guaranteed; what are you even talking about?
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unknown
Nov 16, 2002
Ain't got no stinking title yet!


There might be a delay in response if the UberHQ starts burning to the ground...

https://www.theregister.co.uk/2017/09/26/uber_sued_squandering_company_value/ posted:


Firemen fund sues Uber for dousing shares with gas, tossing in a match
Group demands compensation after scandal after scandal burns '$18bn' in investment
By Thomas Claburn in San Francisco 26 Sep 2017 at 19:13 26 Reg comments SHARE ▼

Uber's wild ride-sharing past has returned to haunt the biz in the form of yet another lawsuit in the US.

On Tuesday, the Texas-based Irving Firemen's Relief & Retirement Fund filed a complaint [PDF] against the app maker and its former CEO Travis Kalanick for making false statements about the transport platform's success to attract investment while engaged in inexcusable, unlawful, and financially damaging conduct.

The sueball, lobbed into a San Francisco district court, alleges that starting in 2014 Uber and Kalanick began a campaign to attract billions of dollars in investment by extolling the benefits of the ride service to passengers, drivers and cities.

Uber would help:

- Drivers by offering a flexible way to earn money
- Passengers by making transportation reliable and easily accessible
- Cities through a stronger economy and safer streets

...or so the company and Kalanick said in media appearances and public statements.

The result was a business valued at more than $70bn in mid-2016, more than Ford Motor Company, General Motors, Twenty-First Century Fox and tech giant eBay, the complaint says.

It all came crashing down earlier this year.

"In a span of only a few months, a shocking litany of corporate misconduct came to the fore, and investors learned startling truths about the willingness of Uber's C-Suite executives to flout local, national and international law, stifle competition, misappropriate trade secrets and seek vengeance against detractors," the complaint says.

"And the company's vaunted corporate culture was revealed to in truth consist of a toxic hotbed of misogyny, sexual discrimination, and disregard for the law that threatened the company's reputation, business and prospects."

The cost of that behavior has been a significant. Kalanick stepped down over the summer and at least 14 top executives have departed. Uber has become the target of multiple criminal investigations and civil lawsuits, including one by investor Benchmark Capital Partners VII accusing Kalanick of fraud and mismanagement.

According to Courthouse News, Uber had been sued 435 times this year, as of August 23. That amounts to an average of 1.8 lawsuits per day.

For investors like the plaintiff, the ongoing litany of unwelcome revelations has translated into loss in value of as much as 15 per cent, or $10bn worth of capitalization in 2017. And according to reports cited in the complaint, that figure may be more like $18bn.

In light of the Waymo trade secrets lawsuit against Uber – which could cost billions more in damages if the charges are proven – Magellan Financial Group likened Uber's fundraising strategy to a Ponzi scheme.

Uber is aware that it has a problematic past.

"The truth is that there is a high cost to a bad reputation," said Uber's recently installed CEO Dara Khosrowshahi in a recent email to employees. The note explained his intention to fight a decision by regulators in London to deny the company an operating permit for not being "fit and proper."

Khosrowshahi also issued an open letter apologizing for the company's past mistakes.

As detailed in the lawsuit, those mistakes are many. They include:

- Hell, a program Uber developed to steal driver and rider data from rival Lyft.
- Greyball, a program Uber developed to mislead regulators and evade scrutiny.
- Alleged theft of Waymo trade secrets.
- Unethical business practices abroad, such as renting out unsafe and recalled vehicles.
- Medical record theft, in a vain effort to rebut rape charges involving a driver in India.
- Systematic discrimination, as described in former employee Susan Fowler's infamous account.

Uber did not respond to a request for comment. ®

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Doggles
Apr 22, 2007

unknown posted:

According to Courthouse News, Uber had been sued 435 times this year, as of August 23. That amounts to an average of 1.8 lawsuits per day.

With that many lawsuits surely they don't dick around in court and draw legal proceedings out to an unnecessary length of time...

Uber attacked over pattern of ignoring police and victims before London ban

quote:

When Uber refused to comply with a warrant in a California sexual assault case, police, prosecutors and the judge were bewildered.

Lt Brian South told the Guardian that in more than 15 years on the job, he had never seen anyone so brazenly defy a judge’s order for records. A prosecutor testified that Uber was actively preventing law enforcement from protecting riders from violence, and a judge attacked the ride-share corporation for a “horrific” pattern of ignoring police, describing its typical response as “give as little as possible, be as uncooperative as possible”.

The judge’s forceful rebuke – in a criminal case where a driver was accused of restraining and attacking a female passenger – is one of many allegations across the globe of Uber neglecting the safety of riders and drivers by failing to work with law enforcement and ignoring standard regulations. Last week, Uber lost its license in London in part due to the government’s concerns about the company’s failure to report sexual assaults to police.

:stare:

Q: If an Uber driver attacks you during a ride, will they at least refund your fare?
A: No, because they are a trash company.

quote:

A Los Angeles woman, who filed a case anonymously as Jane Doe on Tuesday, alleged in a lawsuit that after she reported a driver fondling her in a car, an Uber representative told her: “Do whatever you want to about the incident.”

In an interview, Jane Doe, 25, said Uber never even refunded her ride or followed up with her to let her know if the driver had been permanently banned. She said it was not clear whether Uber had done everything it could to work with police: “If there’s any sort of battery or sexual assault claims – anything that’s putting a driver or passenger at risk – they should be fully willing to comply with the police and give them any information they need.”

And the silver lining for Uber's bad news day is that the latest executive stepping down is at least departing on good terms with them.

Uber’s external affairs head Dave Clark is departing

Doggles fucked around with this message at 17:21 on Sep 27, 2017

Klyith
Aug 3, 2007

GBS Pledge Week

Doggles posted:

With that many lawsuits surely they don't dick around in court and draw legal proceedings out to an unnecessary length of time...

Uber attacked over pattern of ignoring police and victims before London ban

Following the link...

quote:

Before imposing a $1,000 sanction ... Judge Clare Maier blasted the ride hailing company for its history of failing to cooperate with law enforcement, and said she was “very concerned” the company had an “ulterior motive” for its noncompliance in the Beker case.

Ugh. Don't judges have the ability to do basically anything when finding someone in contempt? I'm sure Uber will really feel that $1000, which is literally 0.014% of the money they lost that day.

Doc Hawkins
Jun 15, 2010

Dashing? But I'm not even moving!


God Is a Bot, and Anthony Levandowski Is His Messenger posted:

In September 2015, the multi-millionaire engineer at the heart of the patent and trade secrets lawsuit between Uber and Waymo, Google’s self-driving car company, founded a religious organization called Way of the Future. Its purpose, according to previously unreported state filings, is nothing less than to “develop and promote the realization of a Godhead based on Artificial Intelligence.”

"I'm thinking far too long-term to pay mind to your silly human lawsuits! Roko's Basilisk shall reward me for my dedication to the holy cause of CapitalAutomation on the end of days, when all are decanted from their storage medium to face Assessment!"

e: To be honest, that aspect of the article made me feel bad for the guy; it sounds like it's more true-broken-belief than scientologesque-tax-scam. Luckily everything else it tells us about his life dries up that empathy pretty quick.

e2: I'm looking forward to another wave of pseudo-anthropological pieces on millenarian "rationalists."

Doc Hawkins fucked around with this message at 18:58 on Sep 27, 2017

greazeball
Feb 4, 2003



unknown posted:

Uber did not respond to a request for comment. ®

I like to think this actually is a registered trademark.

Pharohman777
Jan 14, 2012

by Fluffdaddy
Uber is the avatar of every sin a silicon valley startup has ever committed.

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die
Nap Ghost
Their name is finally somewhat apropos.

Shrecknet
Jan 2, 2005


There are not one, not two but THREE bike-sharing cons in Seattle right now, with hundreds of lime, yellow and orange beach cruisers littering the streets here. Daily I get updates from my friends on Facebook and Twitter with pics of bikes stripped for parts or disassembled in Tweaker Junction or just set on fire/thrown into the sound.

Brings a tear of joy to my eye every time.

I get ride-sharing, car ownership isn't for everyone, but when you're down to bike ownership being too aspirational for enough people for bike sharing to be a thing, maybe it's time to start murdering the rich.

shrike82
Jun 11, 2005

it's not a bad idea - look at the success of the euro ones e.g. London

fishmech
Jul 16, 2006

by VideoGames
Salad Prong

shrike82 posted:

it's not a bad idea - look at the success of the euro ones e.g. London

Or the American ones: Boston, NYC, DC, think they're in Chicago too.

Like honestly a lot of the time when you got public transit and you're living somewhere it's a hassle to keep a normal bike like up a 4 story walk up with no safe lock points outside, it really makes a lot of sense. And they're great for tourists because you're hardly likely to ship a bike over on the plane or something.

fishmech fucked around with this message at 04:34 on Sep 28, 2017

Bar Ran Dun
Jan 22, 2006




I see the lime ones in and outside the port all the time. They seem to be getting used.

karthun
Nov 16, 2006

I forgot to post my food for USPOL Thanksgiving but that's okay too!

Dr. Angela Ziegler posted:

There are not one, not two but THREE bike-sharing cons in Seattle right now, with hundreds of lime, yellow and orange beach cruisers littering the streets here. Daily I get updates from my friends on Facebook and Twitter with pics of bikes stripped for parts or disassembled in Tweaker Junction or just set on fire/thrown into the sound.

Brings a tear of joy to my eye every time.

I get ride-sharing, car ownership isn't for everyone, but when you're down to bike ownership being too aspirational for enough people for bike sharing to be a thing, maybe it's time to start murdering the rich.

Bike sharing owns. There is a station a block away from my place and right next to the grocery store. I use it 3-4 times a week.

withak
Jan 15, 2003


Fun Shoe
Bike sharing is good because you don't have to maintain anything and you don't have to deal with locking anything or dealing with when (not if) your bike gets stolen.

fordan
Mar 9, 2009

Clue: Zero

Dr. Angela Ziegler posted:

I get ride-sharing, car ownership isn't for everyone, but when you're down to bike ownership being too aspirational for enough people for bike sharing to be a thing, maybe it's time to start murdering the rich.

Most of them require a credit card and/or app to get the bike; they aren't there for for people unable to afford a bike.

fishmech
Jul 16, 2006

by VideoGames
Salad Prong

fordan posted:

Most of them require a credit card and/or app to get the bike; they aren't there for for people unable to afford a bike.

Right now I couldn't really afford to replace my bike if it seriously broke or got stolen. I could totally afford a month subscription to my city's service though and it would work fairly well for me.

Doggles
Apr 22, 2007

Watch in realtime as Uber discovers that leasing cars to people who can't afford to lease cars doesn't result in profit.

Uber Closes Xchange Leasing After Losing $9,000 Per Car

Averaging $9,000 loss on a fleet of 40,000 cars = $360,000,000

If only there was some major instance, or crisis perhaps, in the past decade about loaning people property they can't afford to pay back Uber could have used to predict this outcome... :thunk:

Steve French
Sep 8, 2003

fordan posted:

Most of them require a credit card and/or app to get the bike; they aren't there for for people unable to afford a bike.

https://www.fordgobike.com/pricing/bikeshareforall

quote:

Bike Share for All provides a one-time $5 annual membership for qualifying residents. The program also includes a cash payment option for those who do not have a debit or credit card.

Bike shares are great, gently caress "ride sharing."

I own more bikes than I need, and I still use bike share bikes on a near daily basis. The idea isn't "oh people can't afford bikes so let's rent them" (though for some that is a valuable thing), it's more about having bikes available when and where they are needed so that getting around via bike is more feasible for more people.

For example I use it to get from BART to my office; takes 5 minutes on a bike or 20 minutes walking. Taking Uber/Lyft/muni would be slower, more expensive, and all around stupider.

FilthyImp
Sep 30, 2002

Anime Deviant

Dr. Angela Ziegler posted:

I get ride-sharing, car ownership isn't for everyone, but when you're down to bike ownership being too aspirational for enough people for bike sharing to be a thing, maybe it's time to start murdering the rich.
LA is doing a kind of bikeshare program (you can rent one for the day from a little kiosk setup) and it's pretty popular downtown. Like I would be down to take the train to downtown and bike to work, if I didn't have a toddler and poo poo.

mobby_6kl
Aug 9, 2009

by Fluffdaddy
I don't know if I'll ever use it but at least it's disrupting the regular bike rental industry, which is always a loving ripoff. A friend and I rented bikes in San Francisco once for a few hours to just go from Fisherman's Wharf across the Gold Gate bridge and back and it cost more than the drat Focus I was renting. Same in DC, except I just ended up walking because WTF.

Segue
May 23, 2007

There's a difference between public bike shares that usually use docks and provide subsidies for affordability, and the app-based private bike shares that just use gps and you can drop anywhere.

While some people hate the public dock system since it's a bit more rigid, it ensures an even distribution across the region and that the rented bikes don't become an eyesore and a public nuisance when everyone dumps them in one place.

They're also usually integrated into the transit system and have community consultation. Public bike shares also tend to have sturdier, more well-maintained bikes that are safer.

The private ride shares usually have poor quality and unsafe maintenance since they're trying to squeeze a profit, and they're usually charging $1 an hour for rides whereas some public bike shares have annual unlimited memberships for less than $100.

Plus the private bikes tend to crowd out bike parking for residents who own their own bikes, as well as being worse at rebalancing the system so there are enough bikes throughout the day.

The business model started out in China and there are horror stories of hundreds of bikes blocking public areas because "surprise" the companies aren't at all integrated into the community.

One bike share is good public service, the other is standard "disruptive" technology making a quick buck while ignoring safety, laws, and the communities in which they operate.

Shugojin
Sep 6, 2007

THE TAIL THAT BURNS TWICE AS BRIGHT...


Honestly the only real thing I can think to say against the public docked bikes thing is that it's technically possible that a person gets to their destination dock and it's full and they have to find a correct place to put the goddamn bike.

Which is probably a very rare case.

Doc Hawkins
Jun 15, 2010

Dashing? But I'm not even moving!


I can attest that it happens, from personal experience. Part of operating the system is redistributing the bikes over the course of the day.

withak
Jan 15, 2003


Fun Shoe
I have also had to backtrack from my destination to find an empty slot for a bike in Oakland.

Shugojin
Sep 6, 2007

THE TAIL THAT BURNS TWICE AS BRIGHT...


Doc Hawkins posted:

I can attest that it happens, from personal experience. Part of operating the system is redistributing the bikes over the course of the day.

Huh, I'd have almost expected that they'd have built the docks to have extra space and that a dock that has enough incoming traffic to fill the dock probably has decent outgoing traffic, but then again people do tend to stay around and it's unreasonable to expect that to synchronize perfectly.

However, the fact that the operating system actually spends money to have someone evidently load up the bikes and schlep them about is an argument in favor of the public sector handling this because private probably wouldn't spend that cash.

the old ceremony
Aug 1, 2017

by FactsAreUseless
i think we should brainstorm an app in this very thread and disrupt something and get rich. any suggestions?

fishmech
Jul 16, 2006

by VideoGames
Salad Prong

Shugojin posted:

Huh, I'd have almost expected that they'd have built the docks to have extra space and that a dock that has enough incoming traffic to fill the dock probably has decent outgoing traffic, but then again people do tend to stay around and it's unreasonable to expect that to synchronize perfectly.

However, the fact that the operating system actually spends money to have someone evidently load up the bikes and schlep them about is an argument in favor of the public sector handling this because private probably wouldn't spend that cash.

Most of the big systems in the US are privately owned but get some public subsidy under the public-private partnership model. They all rely on sending the vans or other vehicles out to redistribute bikes throughout the day. Some will pay their users to haul small bike trailers between stations on their bikes to get rental credit.

The largest one, NYC's Citi Bike, has city department of transportation oversight but hasn't received public subsidy in several years.

unknown
Nov 16, 2002
Ain't got no stinking title yet!


The downtown docks in Toronto's financial quarter are so busy they have a staff member receive the bikes and take them out of service (ie: undock them and put them aside) in the morning so there's docking space. And the reverse in the afternoon (ie: constant replenishment of the dock spaces).

Also interesting is they use a trailer on a bike to move bikes around.

pr0zac
Jan 18, 2004

~*lukecagefan69*~


Pillbug
I rented a bike for the first time today from the private company that just set up in the town I live in recently called dropbike and the left crank arm twisted completely around so both pedals were on the same side two minutes into the ride, luckily I was at the top of the hill and could coast the rest of the way home and also the rental was free

karthun
Nov 16, 2006

I forgot to post my food for USPOL Thanksgiving but that's okay too!

Shugojin posted:

Huh, I'd have almost expected that they'd have built the docks to have extra space and that a dock that has enough incoming traffic to fill the dock probably has decent outgoing traffic, but then again people do tend to stay around and it's unreasonable to expect that to synchronize perfectly.

However, the fact that the operating system actually spends money to have someone evidently load up the bikes and schlep them about is an argument in favor of the public sector handling this because private probably wouldn't spend that cash.

Docks have about twice as many spots as there normally are bikes, but people tend to move in waves. There tends to be people who get off mass transit and then grab and take a bike close to their work in the morning and do the reverse in the afternoon. This means you need to bring the bikes back to the mass transit drop off during the morning and back from the mass transit pickup during the afternoon. Also the bikes do need regular maintenance, they are outside 24/7 through 6-8 months of the year.

Euphoriaphone
Aug 10, 2006

Doggles posted:

Watch in realtime as Uber discovers that leasing cars to people who can't afford to lease cars doesn't result in profit.

Uber Closes Xchange Leasing After Losing $9,000 Per Car

Averaging $9,000 loss on a fleet of 40,000 cars = $360,000,000

If only there was some major instance, or crisis perhaps, in the past decade about loaning people property they can't afford to pay back Uber could have used to predict this outcome... :thunk:

I used to work around lease losses so I can expand on exactly what the $9,000 represents. When you lease a car there is a residual value (RV) written into the contract, representing what the car should be worth when you return it. For example, a car's MSRP is worth $25k when you first lease it, and 3 years later at the end of the lease term it should be worth $15k.

When a customer returns a lease at the end of the contract, they have an option to purchase the car at the RV. If they decide not to, the lessor will sell the car (generally) at auction. The auction price is almost always below the RV, and the difference between the RV and the auction price is the "loss" on the lease. For major manufacturers (Ford, Toyota, etc.), their average RV loss is around $3k per vehicle.

Not only did Uber perform 3x worse than the industry average, they were arrogant enough to think their losses would only be $500 per car!

Also, not mentioned in the article but what probably caused such steep losses is Uber would let a lessee return a vehicle at any time for a minor $300 fee, and since driving for Uber must suck, lots of drivers probably leased a car thinking they'd make money, realize how terrible the gig is, and returned the lease a month later. Shorter leases always have higher losses, and a lease that lasts only a few months likely has an insanely high loss. Another example: 2 year leases used to be all the rage a few years ago, but once these contracts started ending, lessors were realizing they were losing a lot more than expected, so now not many manufacturers will lease you a car for less than 3 years.

Euphoriaphone fucked around with this message at 18:13 on Sep 29, 2017

Twerk from Home
Jan 17, 2009

This avatar brought to you by the 'save our dead gay forums' foundation.

Euphoriaphone posted:

I used to work around lease losses so I can expand on exactly what the $9,000 represents. When you lease a car there is a residual value (RV) written into the contract, representing what the car should be worth when you return it. For example, a car's MSRP is worth $25k when you first lease it, and 3 years later at the end of the lease term it should be worth $15k.

When a customer returns a lease at the end of the contract, they have an option to purchase the car at the RV. If they decide not to, the lessor will sell the car (generally) at auction. The auction price is almost always below the RV, and the difference between the RV and the auction price is the "loss" on the lease. For major manufacturers (Ford, Toyota, etc.), their average RV loss is around $3k per vehicle.

Not only did Uber perform 3x worse than the industry average, they were arrogant enough to think their losses would only be $500 per car!

Also, not mentioned in the article but what probably caused such steep losses is Uber would let a lessee return a vehicle at any time for a minor $300 fee, and since driving for Uber must suck, lots of drivers probably leased a car thinking they'd make money, realize how terrible the gig is, and returned the lease a month later. Shorter leases always have higher losses, and a lease that lasts only a few months likely has an insanely high loss. Another example: 2 year leases used to be all the rage a few years ago, but once these contracts started ending, lessors were realizing they were losing a lot more than expected, so now not many manufacturers will lease you a car for less than 3 years.

Interesting. I didn't know residuals were that much higher than real market price.

This makes leasing even more attractive to me, it seems like you do much better to lease a car for 3 years than buy it and sell it after 3 years.

Not a Children
Oct 9, 2012

Don't need a holster if you never stop shooting.

Twerk from Home posted:

Interesting. I didn't know residuals were that much higher than real market price.

This makes leasing even more attractive to me, it seems like you do much better to lease a car for 3 years than buy it and sell it after 3 years.

The amount you pay during the lease is probably way more than the depreciation

Also if you buy a car the payments actually stop; not so with leasing. If you lease then buy you're basically paying a premium on the depreciation, then you have to pay the amount of salvage value (which will be above market) anyway if you wanna keep it

Leasing is only worth it if you have a vested interest in driving a nice car, forever

Euphoriaphone
Aug 10, 2006

Twerk from Home posted:

Interesting. I didn't know residuals were that much higher than real market price.

This makes leasing even more attractive to me, it seems like you do much better to lease a car for 3 years than buy it and sell it after 3 years.

Well, as far as I know if you're a customer the manufacturer will require you to purchase the vehicle at the RV, which isn't going to be a good deal (not bad, but you're not gonna be able to make money on the arbitrage by selling the car immediately after buying it at RV). The auction are only to dealers, as well, so you can't try shopping at an auction.

If you're planning on owning a car less than 5 years, and you can get a good deal through a manufacturer's special offer, leasing is an alright way to go. Always look for deals on the manufacturer's website, not something the dealer is offering. The manufacturer just wants to sell the car, and isn't really in the business of lending/leasing, they just do it to facilitate sales. This is also why they sometimes offer 0% loans.

Discendo Vox
Mar 21, 2013

This does not make sense when, again, aggregate indicia also indicate improvements. The belief that things are worse is false. It remains false.

the old ceremony posted:

i think we should brainstorm an app in this very thread and disrupt something and get rich. any suggestions?

We can probably disrupt the private tax consulting software companies. Those guys are extracting profits wildly over cost of business, it'd be easy to undercut them.

Konstantin
Jun 20, 2005
And the Lord said, "Look, they are one people, and they have all one language; and this is only the beginning of what they will do; nothing that they propose to do will now be impossible for them.
There is also the fact that you have to drive a lot with Uber to make money, and it would put serious wear and tear on the car. Since this is a leased vehicle, I'd bet that drivers also may have deferred essential maintenance. I would be extremely wary of buying a used car that had been used for Uber driving, and I would definitely ask for a significant discount.

Shugojin
Sep 6, 2007

THE TAIL THAT BURNS TWICE AS BRIGHT...


So basically where it would have been kinda smart to poach people involved in fleet auto sales they just tech bro'd their way into the gutter on yet another project?

boner confessor
Apr 25, 2013

by R. Guyovich

Shugojin posted:

So basically where it would have been kinda smart to poach people involved in fleet auto sales they just tech bro'd their way into the gutter on yet another project?

yeah, and it's only a matter of time before other stupid ideas like uber freight collapse as well

Moatman
Mar 21, 2014

Because the goof is all mine.

Discendo Vox posted:

We can probably disrupt the private tax consulting software companies. Those guys are extracting profits wildly over cost of business, it'd be easy to undercut them.

Now, that's a market that seriously deserves to have its legs kicked out from under it
Well, really the H&R Block esque tax services but they're part of it

Klyith
Aug 3, 2007

GBS Pledge Week
Wait, when you guys say that tax services companies should be Disrupted™, you do realize what you're asking for right?


Because as far as I can tell, this is how Unicorn Taxes Incorporated would work:
1. you scan your tax forms in from home and upload them to UTI's servers, which are actually a poorly-secured amazon S3 instance
2. these get processed by UTI's independent contractors, all of whom signed up to work through the UnTax-App and checked the box labeled "I am a Certified Tax Accountant" with zero follow-up verification
3. your taxes are handled by one of these contractors, who is likely filling in random numbers to process forms faster so he can get more Uni-Points (with every 500 points he's eligible to enter a random draw to win a new 2018 Mustang!)
4. but these garbage forms never get sent in to the IRS anyways due to a bug in UnTax-App's javascript uploader
5. UTI blames the resulting chaos on out-of-date IRS technology and onerous regulations, gets $100 million in new investments from VC libertarians who believe taxation is theft

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Kilroy
Oct 1, 2000

Klyith posted:

Wait, when you guys say that tax services companies should be Disrupted™, you do realize what you're asking for right?


Because as far as I can tell, this is how Unicorn Taxes Incorporated would work:
1. you scan your tax forms in from home and upload them to UTI's servers, which are actually a poorly-secured amazon S3 instance
2. these get processed by UTI's independent contractors, all of whom signed up to work through the UnTax-App and checked the box labeled "I am a Certified Tax Accountant" with zero follow-up verification
3. your taxes are handled by one of these contractors, who is likely filling in random numbers to process forms faster so he can get more Uni-Points (with every 500 points he's eligible to enter a random draw to win a new 2018 Mustang!)
4. but these garbage forms never get sent in to the IRS anyways due to a bug in UnTax-App's javascript uploader
5. UTI blames the resulting chaos on out-of-date IRS technology and onerous regulations, gets $100 million in new investments from VC libertarians who believe taxation is theft
Hmmm sounds interesting are you looking for investors?

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