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Sentient Data
Aug 31, 2011

My molecule scrambler ray will disintegrate your armor with one blow!
Dude, it's only $5k to get in on this Space Pill seminar. It's like half the price of a ted talk pass an it lasts twice as long!

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Barudak
May 7, 2007

Guy Mann posted:

I bet Scientology would have a field day with them: hate psychology, pathological aversion to forming attachments to other people, sees everything as a series of rigid levels of success and desperate for a way to move up it. The only hard part would be getting them to pay for their audits.

Isnt the point of SeaOrg that they work you like a dog to buy the scientology you cant afford?

That and the contract where you promise your eternal soul will keep working for SeaOrg for billions of years.

Dreadwroth
Dec 12, 2009

by R. Guyovich
If these idiots think sex makes you less depressed, I have some bad news for them.

Patrat
Feb 14, 2012

Seriously, I lost the best relationship in my life to depression, just hit a mental brick wall and ghosted my girlfriend for absolutely no reason despite the fact we got on really well, shared hobbies and, yes, had sex almost every day.

I missed a text message and did not reply immediately while travelling for work, then the depression hooked into my skull and I could not break it even though she still tried to get in touch with me for months, after the first few days each such effort just drove me deeper.

You need medication and therapy to shake that poo poo along with support from friends and family, then it still never goes away entirely. There is no magic silver bullet, you need to recognise that there is a problem, you are ill and that you need to deal with it then keep doing so for years.

Though admittedly that relationship probably failed to meet their impossible criteria, a good looking, sporty 22 year old microbiologist studying her for doctorate, into gaming and geeky stuff, woukd just not be good enough for them after all. She had had previous boyfriends!

Relin
Oct 6, 2002

You have been a most worthy adversary, but in every game, there are winners and there are losers. And as you know, in this game, losers get robotizicized!
i see there's more than one thread posting goebbels quotes on the front page of the sub

Zzulu
May 15, 2009

(▰˘v˘▰)

Patrat posted:

Seriously, I lost the best relationship in my life to depression, just hit a mental brick wall and ghosted my girlfriend for absolutely no reason despite the fact we got on really well, shared hobbies and, yes, had sex almost every day.

I missed a text message and did not reply immediately while travelling for work, then the depression hooked into my skull and I could not break it even though she still tried to get in touch with me for months, after the first few days each such effort just drove me deeper.

You need medication and therapy to shake that poo poo along with support from friends and family, then it still never goes away entirely. There is no magic silver bullet, you need to recognise that there is a problem, you are ill and that you need to deal with it then keep doing so for years.

Though admittedly that relationship probably failed to meet their impossible criteria, a good looking, sporty 22 year old microbiologist studying her for doctorate, into gaming and geeky stuff, woukd just not be good enough for them after all. She had had previous boyfriends!

Gross dude

22 years old? I bet she had nasolabial folds

Plus her pussy must have been utterly wrecked since she, no doubt, had several hundred partners by that time. What were you thinking?

Shanghaied
Oct 12, 2004

BIG PAD

Zzulu posted:

Gross dude

22 years old? I bet she had nasolabial folds

Plus her pussy must have been utterly wrecked since she, no doubt, had several hundred partners by that time. What were you thinking?

Hundreds? Try thousands: no girl is a virgin after 14, so that's eight years from 14 to 22, 52 weeks in a year, which makes 416 weeks. And assume 5 partners a week, that's 2080 partners! At least!

Seriously though, how do these chucklefucks think that it'll work in practice? I live in a largish city, work at largish workplace and have okay circle of friends, and I don't think I'm acquainted with or interact with more than maybe a couple hundred people at the most. Like in a smaller town, do they think Chad/Stacey just goes: "welp, gotta make the 3-hour commute to the next town over from now on, have hosed every single fuckable person in this place now."

Shanghaied
Oct 12, 2004

BIG PAD

ikanreed
Sep 25, 2009

I honestly I have no idea who cannibal[SIC] is and I do not know why I should know.

syq dude, just syq!

Chad, once again, gives excellent advice.

chumbler
Mar 28, 2010

Their resistance to bathing is weird to me, because taking a shower is one of the best parts of the day.

KomodoWagon
May 10, 2013

by R. Guyovich
Lol at trying to demonize and ridicule people who advocate hygiene

Shanghaied
Oct 12, 2004

BIG PAD
Ooooo, let's have some fun activity for the whole thread!

joylessdivision
Jun 15, 2013



Shanghaied posted:

Hundreds? Try thousands: no girl is a virgin after 14, so that's eight years from 14 to 22, 52 weeks in a year, which makes 416 weeks. And assume 5 partners a week, that's 2080 partners! At least!

Seriously though, how do these chucklefucks think that it'll work in practice? I live in a largish city, work at largish workplace and have okay circle of friends, and I don't think I'm acquainted with or interact with more than maybe a couple hundred people at the most. Like in a smaller town, do they think Chad/Stacey just goes: "welp, gotta make the 3-hour commute to the next town over from now on, have hosed every single fuckable person in this place now."

It's impossible. Like everything these pathetic losers claim to be cold hard facts, there's no actual basis to any of it.

The only women I could possibly think of that have had the number of partners these dipshits are howling about are porn stars, but that's because it's their job to gently caress.

I'm an average dude with depression who has managed to get laid and have (mostly) functional relationships over the years and when I've been single, I'm not sitting around blaming :females: for it.

Then again I don't have a giant persecution complex about how the world is holding me back from what I "Deserve" (which apparently is virgin jail bait :chloe:)

ikanreed
Sep 25, 2009

I honestly I have no idea who cannibal[SIC] is and I do not know why I should know.

syq dude, just syq!

Shanghaied posted:

Ooooo, let's have some fun activity for the whole thread!



I check off plenty of that and I'm not even remotely incel.

1st AD
Dec 3, 2004

Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu: sometimes passing just isn't an option.

ikanreed posted:

I check off plenty of that and I'm not even remotely incel.

I only got 4 :getin:

Literally A Person
Jan 1, 1970

Smugworth Wuz Here

He's such a nice guy that when she makes it clear she would just like to walk on her own he insists that he knows better. WHAT A NICE GUY!!!!

Shanghaied
Oct 12, 2004

BIG PAD

ikanreed posted:

I check off plenty of that and I'm not even remotely incel.

Oh yeah? Have you tried stop showering? Stop showering.

quote:

It's over. I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life.

Today was the first day at the uni. I went to attend some class about climate change. The room was filled with cute nerdy girls. The sight was too much for my incel d*** to handle. Their quirky personalities, the glasses they wore, their perfect bodies just triggered me. I'm one year older than the other people at the class so I feel like an old man. The other students are all Normies so I'm the creepy incel of the class. I don't know any of them and it's too late to meet anyone since all social connections are established in the first year.

Now, I have to attend the class and tolerate being in the same room with girls I won't have sex with. It won't be an easy task but I have to master up some copefidence and do it. If I'm strong I will graduate in 4 months. Then, I can LDAR at home for 6 months with the excuse that no postgraduate program accepted me.

Tbh I don't want to do any postgraduate or work later on. There is no point in wageslaving as an incel. I have no dreams and ambitions. The only thing I care about is sex. Normies have gfs or families they have to work for and care about. I have noone and I have no intention of becoming a slave without the prospect of sex. Working 8 hours a day then coming home to sleep and then go to work again. The cycle repeats evey day and it seems like a nightmare.

I have to find a way to be NEET so that I can stay home all day, avoid the s** fuel that the outside world is and happily cope. It's the best I future I can achieve. If I'm going to be a alone at least I can do it with all the pleasures I can get. Weed, porn, alcochol, games, music and of course, no work.

Waaaaahhhhh, I wanna be alone at home all day, why won't an anime virgin SWAT team just bust down my door and jump on my dick? Why am I so alone, when I'm put myself in an enclosed, private space?

UP THE BUM NO BABY
Sep 1, 2011

by Hand Knit

1st AD posted:

I only got 4 :getin:

What up, fellow less-than-6-inch-penis haver?

goethe.cx
Apr 23, 2014


Shanghaied posted:

Ooooo, let's have some fun activity for the whole thread!



"nervous or panicky if you have to give a presentation"

welp, that settles it, if you have literally the most common fear on planet earth then you're an incel

Barudak
May 7, 2007

I only got two. Not having a facebook hurt me.

chumbler
Mar 28, 2010

Man I don't have any dreams or ambitions either, but I still get up and go to work every day because it will help if maybe someday I do find some (and the time to pursue them).

And I checked a lot of that card but think I managed to avoid any bingos.

Shanghaied
Oct 12, 2004

BIG PAD

Koyaanisgoatse posted:

"nervous or panicky if you have to give a presentation"

welp, that settles it, if you have literally the most common fear on planet earth then you're an incel

I don't think you get bingo, bud.

quote:

How do you survive ?

I'm broke as gently caress right now. I worked for 5 dollars an hour and got fired and now I'm poo poo out of luck. It feels like poo poo because no one wants to hire some ugly as loving guy because I will scare the customers away. THAT shirt hurts because I know theres nothing I can do about it. If anyone has any ideas or words of support I'd appreciate it. Being incel is hard.

quote:

I'm assuming you have little to no experience with the following advice:

Seek a temporary employment agency in your area, tell them your willing to work full-time, part-time, nights, weekends, etc.

Ask for warehouse jobs, material handler jobs, data entry jobs, telemarketing jobs depending on your experience and interest.

Seek out jobs that don't require as much customer interaction. When you apply to a restaurant, go for dishwasher or cook, not server or bartender. Same goes for retail, work in the stock room not as a service rep.

quote:

You're a loving idiot.

quote:

Wtf why?

quote:

Well he was being condescending and assumed that I haven't tried any of that. He's like every other normie out there.

quote:

Some cels are just mean even though this is good get off your feet advice

quote:

You're a loving idiot as well.

Shanghaied
Oct 12, 2004

BIG PAD


Palpek
Dec 27, 2008


Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.


Why am I not surprised that people who believe in 'wah, why am I not handed a girlfriend on a silver platter, there's no use in trying to get one, it's over' proceed to extend it to education, work, friendship, personal goals and hygiene...

Slugworth
Feb 18, 2001

If two grown men can't make a pervert happy for a few minutes in order to watch a film about zombies, then maybe we should all just move to Iran!
I got 13 out of 25 on that thing, but still no bingo.

The most shocking part of this thread has been finding out the average person has over 300 facebook friends. I feel like I've had a reasonably average social life, and I'm at close to 100. Who the hell are people facebook friending?

Slugworth fucked around with this message at 17:50 on Oct 2, 2017

Furia
Jul 26, 2015

Grimey Drawer

Slugworth posted:

I got 13 out of 25 on that thing, but still no bingo.

:unsmith::respek::unsmith:

green chicken feet
Nov 5, 2015

spray-paint the vegetables
dog food stalls
with the beefcake pantyhose
Grimey Drawer

Slugworth posted:

I got 13 out of 25 on that thing, but still no bingo.

The most shocking part of this thread has been finding out the average person has over 300 facebook friends. I feel like I've had a reasonably average social life, and I'm at close to 100. Who the hell are people facebook friending?

Some people friend everyone they had a class in school with, everyone they have worked with, and their entire family, including distant relatives.

Hobologist
May 4, 2007

We'll have one entire section labelled "for degenerates"

chumbler posted:

Their resistance to bathing is weird to me, because taking a shower is one of the best parts of the day.

It's sort of a fraught subject with them. Well-meaning normies advise incels to shower regularly and hit the gym, but incels claim that the unshowered, ungymmed loser is a cruel and harmful stereotype, unlike the 18 year olds who have had 20,000 sexual partners already which is an empirically established fact. However, they seem to ignore all the stories from their fellow incels that begin "My sister brought over her three Stacey friends for a ride to the mall, and I hadn't showered in three days and was still wearing my masturbation shirt..." to cite just one example.

Guy Mann
Mar 28, 2016

by Lowtax

Koyaanisgoatse posted:

"nervous or panicky if you have to give a presentation"

welp, that settles it, if you have literally the most common fear on planet earth then you're an incel

I thought that was the joke of all these Incel memes, they're trolling by listing mostly completely normal things people are insecure and self conscious about to Barnum Effect insecure people.

1st AD
Dec 3, 2004

Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu: sometimes passing just isn't an option.

Slugworth posted:

I got 13 out of 25 on that thing, but still no bingo.

The most shocking part of this thread has been finding out the average person has over 300 facebook friends. I feel like I've had a reasonably average social life, and I'm at close to 100. Who the hell are people facebook friending?

-People I went to school with
-People I volunteer with
-People that I worked with
-People that I would like to do business with
-People that I've coached
-People that coached me
-People at the gym
-People that I've hosed
-People I would like to gently caress but haven't hosed yet
-Friends of friends
-Roommates, past and present
-Family

I have 1100 friends on Facebook :getin:

Macasaurus
Oct 12, 2012

1st AD posted:

-People I went to school with
-People I volunteer with
-People that I worked with
-People that I would like to do business with
-People that I've coached
-People that coached me
-People at the gym
-People that I've hosed
-People I would like to gently caress but haven't hosed yet
-Friends of friends
-Roommates, past and present
-Family

I have 1100 friends on Facebook :getin:

reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Slugworth
Feb 18, 2001

If two grown men can't make a pervert happy for a few minutes in order to watch a film about zombies, then maybe we should all just move to Iran!

1st AD posted:

-People I went to school with
-People I volunteer with
-People that I worked with
-People that I would like to do business with
-People that I've coached
-People that coached me
-People at the gym
-People that I've hosed
-People I would like to gently caress but haven't hosed yet
-Friends of friends
-Roommates, past and present
-Family

I have 1100 friends on Facebook :getin:
- Gross
- Cool
- Probably pretty normal
- Use LinkedIn
- I don't know enough about coach culture to comment
- See above
- Statistically irrelevant
- Creeper
- ..... Why?
- Again, gotta be statistically irrelevant
- Gross

Ghostlight
Sep 25, 2009

maybe for one second you can pause; try to step into another person's perspective, and understand that a watermelon is cursing me



I might have almost 20 facebook friends because I'm not someone's aunt or a millennial.

Instruction Manuel
May 15, 2007

Yes, it is what it looks like!

Hobologist posted:

It's sort of a fraught subject with them. Well-meaning normies advise incels to shower regularly and hit the gym, but incels claim that the unshowered, ungymmed loser is a cruel and harmful stereotype, unlike the 18 year olds who have had 20,000 sexual partners already which is an empirically established fact. However, they seem to ignore all the stories from their fellow incels that begin "My sister brought over her three Stacey friends for a ride to the mall, and I hadn't showered in three days and was still wearing my masturbation shirt..." to cite just one example.

Brb, gotta take my formal masturbation shirt to the dry cleaners. I'll just be wearing the casual masturbation shirt today.

Somfin
Oct 25, 2010

In my🦚 experience🛠️ the big things🌑 don't teach you anything🤷‍♀️.

Nap Ghost

Slugworth posted:

- Gross
- Cool
- Probably pretty normal
- Use LinkedIn
- I don't know enough about coach culture to comment
- See above
- Statistically irrelevant
- Creeper
- ..... Why?
- Again, gotta be statistically irrelevant
- Gross

Maybe don't waste your time judging how someone else uses social media?

Definitely don't waste your time posting your judgments.

KillerJunglist
May 22, 2007

Lion of Judah protect you, Jah be praised.

Somfin posted:

Maybe don't waste your time judging how someone else uses social media?

Definitely don't waste your time posting your judgments.

But isn't making lists that meticulously detail everything you find wrong with something a very incel thing to do? Is this thread being incel-trated? :wth:

goethe.cx
Apr 23, 2014


Wamdoodle posted:

Brb, gotta take my formal masturbation shirt to the dry cleaners. I'll just be wearing the casual masturbation shirt today.

"No need to starch it"

Brother Entropy
Dec 27, 2009

Somfin posted:

Maybe don't waste your time judging how someone else uses social media?

boy are you in the wrong thread

hyphz
Aug 5, 2003

Number 1 Nerd Tear Farmer 2022.

Keep it up, champ.

Also you're a skeleton warrior now. Kree.
Unlockable Ben

Barudak posted:

Isnt the point of SeaOrg that they work you like a dog to buy the scientology you cant afford?

That and the contract where you promise your eternal soul will keep working for SeaOrg for billions of years.

Yep. Sad thing is, there's actually is a lot of decidedly dodgy stuff in psychology, but any resistance to psychology is now associated with Scientology and ridiculed. Basically, Scientology did psychology a huge favor by opposing it.

I doubt it'd help with being incel, though. Although Hubbard is supposed to have previously worked with Aleister Crowley who did basically want to start a cult in order to have sex with edgy teen girls.

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Slugworth
Feb 18, 2001

If two grown men can't make a pervert happy for a few minutes in order to watch a film about zombies, then maybe we should all just move to Iran!

Somfin posted:

Maybe don't waste your time judging how someone else uses social media?

Definitely don't waste your time posting your judgments.
I mean, it was tongue in cheek, he can do whatever he wants. But also, you just posted a judgement about how I'm using social media?

I do think it's weird to be facebook friends with your friend's friends though.

Friends.

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