Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost
The confusion stems from how to handle it when the pronoun and the noun are hanging out in the same sentence with verbs of being.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Bibliotechno Music
Dec 30, 2008

Ham Sandwiches posted:

No like, the thing you did, was not only wrong, but you felt the need to correct someone that was right, then you admitted that you are pretty ignorant on the topic, so why waste everyone's time and mislead others AND look stupid in the process?? It's genuinely bizarre to me

It's the law of Mirthless, Hammy. You're a strange enough poster that even when you're right, you're wrong.

(Neither of you are bad posters, just strange and usually wrong)

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost
This will disappoint everyone, but grammatically this issue is in a state of flux, so importantly, and essentially, who gives a poo poo

It is we. We give a poo poo.





:smug:

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost

cumshitter posted:

While we're on the subject, avoid embarrasment at Burger King by ordering "three Whoppers Junior" rather than the incorrect "Whopper Juniors."

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost
It pisses me off how nonstop funny barudak and cumshitter are.

anyway.

quote:

Me [32f] with husband [35m] of three years, ADHD and useless at communication?Relationships
2 points 16 comments submitted 3 months ago by torollornottoroll to r/relationships

Hi all,
I'd like to think my husband and I are good, loving people who generally treat each other well, but we do have our issues and they are usually around communication. We've been married three years, together six, and we just can't seem to figure certain things out. I'm really hurting from today's example.

May help to mention he is hyperactive ADHD. I also have a tendency to question myself in conflict with others while he has a tendency not to. I find it really difficult to have conversations with him because he is somewhat impatient and solution focused. Today something happened at my job that really got me down, and I called him asking if I could get it off my chest. I didn't get far before he started cutting me off, thinking he knew the rest of the story because he knows me and had something to say that he thought would help. I immediately got frustrated and told him the whole point was I just wanted to get it off my chest and if he can't or doesn't want to just listen that we should just end the call. He agreed to end the call because he was upset that I was heated (fair enough). My chest is aching because I can't shake the feeling that everything always has to be about him, and he thinks he knows what he's doing to the extent that my thoughts and feelings are always secondary. We've read things like women from Venus men from mars with theories on men generally wanting to fix things and women wanting to just express feelings and get sympathy, but after all these years not much has changed.

I want to be fair in my perceptions of these interactions. I know I tend to be more sensitive and complain about stuff, especially work, a lot. It must get old, even though I try to keep an eye on it. But he cuts me off all the time, he often thinks he has the answers, and I can't stand the dynamic.

Bottom line is, I feel like when I manage to get through to him he puts effort into himself or making me happy. But I feel like I am seldom able to get through to him in the first place, even when I get to the point of seriously considering ending things. I can't even seem to convey that to him, when I feel like he's losing me. He is too impatient, too mentally busy, and frankly it feels like he is too arrogant to hardly be capable of listening and taking things in from me. Several crucial things I've just given up on over time because it's hardly ever a good time to address them or when we do it hardly ever gets discussed in a mutually patient, caring, respectful, constructive way. This is despite him being on medication and us going to therapy for the last while. In fact, he has said at times he feels like the therapist is biased in my favor and seems to disregard certain things, but I feel like with 30 years of experience she's more of an authority on that than him.

I'm seriously concerned that I'm just checking out slowly over time and I'll get to a point where I don't care for him and resent him despite all the wonderful things (which there's a ton). A few friends have expressed a little concern for me, thinking he is somewhat sexist and overbearing (eg the type to be very caring and chivalrous but also kind of patronizing). Everyone thinks he is a really nice guy but that he is overbearing in conversations, thinks he is right about everything, and doesn't treat me quite like an equal. I've tried to gently discuss this with him, but it hurts his feelings and he tends to think people don't know him or understand. However he has said at times he knows he has a bit of an ego problem.

It all feels so complex. Can anyone tell me if they've experienced something like this, and how much it might relate to the ADHD thing?

Tldr; husband has ADHD and a bit of an ego, and it's always been very hard to get things through to him when I need to. Can this be fixed, or lived with given most everything else is naturally positive and easy?

Edit: Adding another example because a commenter pointed out with the example given it looks like this is all about my wanting to air grievances and get sympathy without solutions, but it extends a lot further. Another example is him getting so caught up in things that we rarely have sex (like once a month or two), and when I tried to talk to him about what's going on with him and what's going on with me and how to find equal ground, he just dominated the conversation to talk about why he gets like that from the perspective that I just need to understand and accept it, and disregarded my side and the impact on the relationship. Tried to have the conversation multiple times over years, but it just gets worse.

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!

Pick posted:

This will disappoint everyone, but grammatically this issue is in a state of flux, so importantly, and essentially, who gives a poo poo

It is we. We give a poo poo.





:smug:

It’s all about hunting down grammatical errors and claiming people as your property like a retard predator.

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost

ClamdestineBoyster posted:

It’s all about hunting down grammatical errors and claiming people as your property like a retard predator.

you might not understand predator culture, but you do have to respect it, at least publicly. for gently caress's sakes this is how you aliens lost pennsylvania.

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!

Pick posted:

you might not understand predator culture, but you do have to respect it, at least publicly. for gently caress's sakes this is how you aliens lost pennsylvania.

Yeah I need to respect a retard slave army. :jerkbag:

Submarine Sandpaper
May 27, 2007


ClamdestineBoyster posted:

It’s all about hunting down grammatical errors and claiming people as your property like a retard predator.

Grammar mistakes are immoral - Kant.

My heart was in the right place

Bibliotechno Music
Dec 30, 2008

Pick posted:

It pisses me off how nonstop funny barudak and cumshitter are.

anyway.

Pick is ADHD your keyword tonight? Because again, it me, but socialized as a man who absolutely cannot be wrong. I am constantly cutting people off so I can guess how the story ends, and everyone hates it, and I can't stop.

Ham Sandwiches
Jul 7, 2000

And in the end I think Dorian is a real fucker and the 3am phone call about the punch out was 100% bullshit

cumshitter
Sep 27, 2005

by Fluffdaddy
Whoa, look at Dr. Language with his prescriptivism pad here, writing prescriptions for grammar.

Scathach
Apr 4, 2011

You know that thing where you sleep on your arm funny and when you wake up it's all numb? Yeah that's my whole world right now.


My god so many of these people have horrible families. That family that doesn't like their kid's boyfriend because he has diabetes, gently caress them in particular.

God.

Submarine Sandpaper
May 27, 2007


I think most parents are that horrible. It just depends on if they're scared of their child's response to vocalizing it.

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost

Bibliotechno Music posted:

Pick is ADHD your keyword tonight? Because again, it me, but socialized as a man who absolutely cannot be wrong. I am constantly cutting people off so I can guess how the story ends, and everyone hates it, and I can't stop.

The first was hypervigilant, second was hyperactive. I tried to find "hyperballs" but it turns out there were no results.

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost
I [24M] discovered my girlfriend [24F] has a bellybutton phobia that is preventing her from removing a black stone from inside of it.Relationships
2 comments submitted 29 minutes ago by KeyBull to r/relationships

Today, while laying in bed with my girlfriend, i noticed a small black stone like object inside of her bellybutton. I asked her to try and get it out and she began to cry immediately. She said that she is disgusted by her bellybutton and even the thought of cleaning it makes her extremely uncomfortable. She explained that because of this she is unable to clean it and has no interest in removing the putrid mass from her body. After some research I discovered the mass is actually a Naval Stone, a mass of dead skin and funk that primarily forms due to poor hygene. Without intervention, it can continue to grow and potentially become infected or rancid.

I absolutely love this girl and understand that this is a result of her phobia so im trying to be sensitive, but I cannot stand that she has this disgusting thing growing from her naval. I myself fell a need to eradicate all manner of pimple, blackheads, and cyst from my body and this thing she's got is by far the worst i've ever seen. I really want it out ASAP. Can anyone offer advice on how I can get her to remove this Naval Stone soon without being insensitive to her fear?

TLDR; GF has Naval Stone and wont remove it due to phobia. How can i get her to overcome her fear and remove the mass.

kloa
Feb 14, 2007


Dude should just tweeze it out when she's sleeping :shrug:

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless

Pick posted:

The first was hypervigilant, second was hyperactive. I tried to find "hyperballs" but it turns out there were no results.

Glad to hear none of my ex's post on Reddit

cumshitter
Sep 27, 2005

by Fluffdaddy

Pick posted:

I [24M] discovered my girlfriend [24F] has a bellybutton phobia that is preventing her from removing a black stone from inside of it.Relationships
2 comments submitted 29 minutes ago by KeyBull to r/relationships

Hopefully this ends with them taking the navel stone to a duck filled pond, holding hands, and skipping it at some ducks.

Virigoth
Apr 28, 2009

Corona rules everything around me
C.R.E.A.M. get the virus
In the ICU y'all......



Pick posted:

I [24M] discovered my girlfriend [24F] has a bellybutton phobia that is preventing her from removing a black stone from inside of it.Relationships

TLDR; GF has Naval Stone and wont remove it due to phobia. How can i get her to overcome her fear and remove the mass.

Someone is gonna smoke that rock one way or another.

ArbitraryC
Jan 28, 2009
Pick a number, any number
Pillbug

Pick posted:

I [24M] discovered my girlfriend [24F] has a bellybutton phobia that is preventing her from removing a black stone from inside of it.Relationships
2 comments submitted 29 minutes ago by KeyBull to r/relationships

Today, while laying in bed with my girlfriend, i noticed a small black stone like object inside of her bellybutton. I asked her to try and get it out and she began to cry immediately. She said that she is disgusted by her bellybutton and even the thought of cleaning it makes her extremely uncomfortable. She explained that because of this she is unable to clean it and has no interest in removing the putrid mass from her body. After some research I discovered the mass is actually a Naval Stone, a mass of dead skin and funk that primarily forms due to poor hygene. Without intervention, it can continue to grow and potentially become infected or rancid.

I absolutely love this girl and understand that this is a result of her phobia so im trying to be sensitive, but I cannot stand that she has this disgusting thing growing from her naval. I myself fell a need to eradicate all manner of pimple, blackheads, and cyst from my body and this thing she's got is by far the worst i've ever seen. I really want it out ASAP. Can anyone offer advice on how I can get her to remove this Naval Stone soon without being insensitive to her fear?

TLDR; GF has Naval Stone and wont remove it due to phobia. How can i get her to overcome her fear and remove the mass.

do not gis naval stone.

Scathach
Apr 4, 2011

You know that thing where you sleep on your arm funny and when you wake up it's all numb? Yeah that's my whole world right now.


Whoops.

Good god.

Serephina
Nov 8, 2005

恐竜戦隊
ジュウレンジャー

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

In 2004 you'd have been charged :10bux: for that kind of post!!

If it was 2004 pick would have been permabanned. We live in a very different world nowadays

Haifisch
Nov 13, 2010

Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!



Taco Defender
I [21 M] bought a gun this week. My parents [50s M/F] are freaking out and want to cut me off.

quote:

Hi everyone,

So a bit of backstory. I turned 21 in March and started to go shooting with my friend from the military. We would go once a month, and my parents never said anything about it. I've always thought guns were cool, and that they are a right of mine. I decided to get my concealed carry license in May. I told my parents this and they made no comments about actual guns or gave their opinion on it.

I saved up my money for a handgun from May to September. This past Sunday, I finally pulled the trigger and bought a handgun for $600. I shot my handgun at the range and instantly fell in love this week.

The problem: my parents are not happy one bit I bought a handgun. I am 21, and in my 4th out 5 years of Computer Science at University. Thankfully, my parents pay for my tuition, rent, and lent me their car. Because I bought this handgun, they are threatening to no longer pay tuition, rent, and currently have taken away my car. I work part time and can't make it to work without my car.

My parents and I's views on guns must be very different. I do not understand how spending $600 of my own money on a hobby of mine is a big deal. I do not see guns as terrible killing machines, and just want to protect myself and shoot it at the range. I spent $1,000 on skis in January 2017 and that didn't matter at all to them. So how is spending $600 on a gun different than $1,000 skis? It's no different in my book. I spent my own money on both. They were also okay with my older brother spending thousands of dollars on trips abroad too whilst funding his college.

I have constantly reassured my parents that I am 100% responsible with my gun. The concealed carry class taught me gun safety, and how to properly deal with a firearm. I have it locked up when not on me, and I know the 4 basic rules of a firearm. I have attempted to reassure my parents that I know what I am doing and that they need not to worry. I asked them to come to the range with my to prove it, but they refuse.

I'm not really sure what to do in this situation. I love shooting, and I want to be able to protect myself. I cannot afford for them to cut me off as I could potentially not be able to finish school. I just can't see how me buying a gun with my own hard earned money entitles this reaction from my parents. They also currently have my car, and won't return it until I return my gun. I cannot do this as all gun sales are final. I also have no interest in returning my gun as I enjoy it immensely. Reddit how can I make this situation right?

tl;dr: I bought a gun with my own hard earned money. Parents are threatening to no longer fund my college, and have taken car away.

quote:

It's both. They said "If you have money for guns then you can pay for college", and they are definitely not gun people. I know it's their money, but they are just so inconsistent with caring about what I spend money on is my issue. Is getting rid of my gun for one year going to change anything?

Bibliotechno Music
Dec 30, 2008

Haifisch posted:

I [21 M] bought a gun this week. My parents [50s M/F] are freaking out and want to cut me off.

Hold your parents up at gunpoint for exactly the amount of money you need to finish college. What could go wrong?!?!?

Propaganda Hour
Aug 25, 2008



after editing wikipedia as a joke for 16 years, i ve convinced myself that homer simpson's japanese name translates to the "The beer goblin"

ArbitraryC posted:

do not gis naval stone.

I really should have listened to this post.

Haifisch
Nov 13, 2010

Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!



Taco Defender
Time to put on your detective hats:

I [30F] found a mystery digital camera in my husband's [32M] belongings.

quote:

Hello everyone. Throwaway account here. Thank you ahead for taking the time to share my problem with me.

So, I am pretty new to the USA and am not working yet as I have some time before my employment authorization is granted. My husband and I met in my home country when he was there working and I moved here to be with him. Everything is pretty peachy, though obviously my hands get a little restless sometimes. My husband (let's call him Ben) spends about 50 hours a work at week, sometimes a little more.

Anyway. I was busy cleaning under the kitchen sink this afternoon while Ben was at work, and found a biscuit tin. I was curious about it, it was so far back that I thought it was perhaps something he'd lost, or was from a previous tenant. It was dusty, but the digital camera inside was not. I powered on the digital camera, and found many photos, of my stuff. Pictures of my purse hanging on a dining room chair, pictures of my makeup in my cosmetics box, pictures of my coat and scarf on the coat hooks, pictures of my keys on the kitchen counter. Always of my stuff, and always in pairs. Meaning, one after the other, of the same scene. I can't find a cord to attach it to the computer, or charger. I looked through all of the photos (quickly, in case he notices the battery drain) and turned it off and was careful to put it back the way I found it... and, well, I don't know what to do next.

I don't know exactly what I'm looking at. I don't even know how I'm supposed to feel, if I should confront him, if it is anything worth confronting him about? He does not seem the type to have any kind of compulsive tic. But most importantly, why would a person do this?

tl;dr; I found a hidden digital camera that my husband has been using to take pictures of my possessions in pairs. I don't know what they mean or if I should bring it up.
Reddit's theories: Gathering proof they're in a relationship for a green card, tracking to see if she's cheating, hiding a crossdressing habit and using the pics to make sure stuff's put back in the same spot, hiding that he's searching her stuff, taking photos for insurance, doing some sort of weird art thing.

ArbitraryC
Jan 28, 2009
Pick a number, any number
Pillbug

Propaganda Hour posted:

I really should have listened to this post.
I dunno what I was expecting I just couldn't really imagine the possibilities and now I am filled with beer and regret.

ArbitraryC
Jan 28, 2009
Pick a number, any number
Pillbug

Haifisch posted:

I [21 M] bought a gun this week. My parents [50s M/F] are freaking out and want to cut me off.

It's a bit tough cause I could sorta understand the parent's perspectives of "If you're living off our contributions you shouldn't be making big purchases with your work money instead of saving it", like as someone who grew up in a poor household and was financially independent since I was 18 I often felt during college that a lot of my peers were super bad with money because they were just adult dependents. Particularly lol at "4th year of my 5 year regular degree". But OTOH if they had no qualms with letting him spoil himself previously (with his skis example) then yeah it feels like their opposition to the recent hobby is more political than it is a principle thing.

Or maybe it was just the straw that broke the camels back and he's neglecting to mention their previous disappointment who knows.

ArbitraryC fucked around with this message at 05:04 on Oct 7, 2017

therobit
Aug 19, 2008

I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Haifisch posted:

Time to put on your detective hats:

I [30F] found a mystery digital camera in my husband's [32M] belongings.

Reddit's theories: Gathering proof they're in a relationship for a green card, tracking to see if she's cheating, hiding a crossdressing habit and using the pics to make sure stuff's put back in the same spot, hiding that he's searching her stuff, taking photos for insurance, doing some sort of weird art thing.

Insurance was my first thought, but it is also possible he is going to cut off her head and make a lady suit and impersonate her.

Anne Whateley
Feb 11, 2007
:unsmith: i like nice words
It's not just a political thing. For example, if you live with a gun then your odds of getting killed with a gun go up some astronomical percent. Skis not so much. Everyone in the house has to be on board with something like that.

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost

Anne Whateley posted:

It's not just a political thing. For example, if you live with a gun then your odds of getting killed with a gun go up some astronomical percent. Skis not so much. Everyone in the house has to be on board with something like that.

yeah fuckkin skiiers

Anne Whateley
Feb 11, 2007
:unsmith: i like nice words
Actually that...probably is pretty true for skis too. Although it probably only applies to the owner of the skis and not to other cohabitants. It's unlikely you're getting stabbed with a ski, anyway

cumshitter
Sep 27, 2005

by Fluffdaddy
I just realized the blank slate guy who is aggressively passive could end like that one episode of Gargoyles where Goliath is under a hypnosis spell. They can't break it so they circumvent it by commanding him to act as he normally would forever.

"What do you want to do babe?"

"I want you to be a more decisive person."

"Ok I've decided to open the relationship. Girls only."

Admiral Ray
May 17, 2014

Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

ArbitraryC posted:

do not gis naval stone.

Dump her like a ship would dump an infected anchor

ArbitraryC
Jan 28, 2009
Pick a number, any number
Pillbug

Anne Whateley posted:

It's not just a political thing. For example, if you live with a gun then your odds of getting killed with a gun go up some astronomical percent. Skis not so much. Everyone in the house has to be on board with something like that.

I feel like that's a bit of a stretch, like it's not innaccurate but that'd be a pretty strained reason to threaten your son's future over. Those stats mostly apply to small children shooting themselves or domestic violence incidents, not like adult roomies.

e: and he mentions they pay his rent so that suggests they live apart anyways.

ArbitraryC fucked around with this message at 07:46 on Oct 7, 2017

BrutalistMcDonalds
Oct 4, 2012


Lipstick Apathy

webmeister posted:

How can you call yourself a prepper when you can't even prepare your girlfriend for what she's going to find in the spare room
Good point.

cumshitter
Sep 27, 2005

by Fluffdaddy
As if the prepper fantasy isn't to shoot any woman that comes near you before she seduces you into giving up a can of dogfood you found while fighting off mutants in the irradiated hole that used to be a Kroger.

cumshitter
Sep 27, 2005

by Fluffdaddy
The prepper fantasy is basically the parts of I Am Legend where Will Smith puts up cardboard cut outs of people at the Blockbuster except they use the cut outs as target practice and also they bring all the videos home at once and never leave their prepper hole until they need to empty out a hefty bag full of poo poo and piss.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

ZearothK
Aug 25, 2008

I've lost twice, I've failed twice and I've gotten two dishonorable mentions within 7 weeks. But I keep coming back. I am The Trooper!

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2021


ArbitraryC posted:

I feel like that's a bit of a stretch, like it's not innaccurate but that'd be a pretty strained reason to threaten your son's future over. Those stats mostly apply to small children shooting themselves or domestic violence incidents, not like adult roomies.

e: and he mentions they pay his rent so that suggests they live apart anyways.

He should say he got rid of the gun, let them pay stuff to the end of his course and then announce he bought the gun back from his drug dealer.

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply