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hexwren
Feb 27, 2008

Guy Mann posted:

The weird time when games tried to have you use the numpad for everything, like the original 90s FF7 PC port and Hitman: Codename 47.

Also Deus Ex binding reload to the semicolon.

Heavy Gear 2 was another one that loved its numpad, specifically/especially for x-y-z zero g movement

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Perestroika
Apr 8, 2010

Discendo Vox posted:

Please feel free to look up the controls for X-Men: Madness in Murderworld.Now, that was the era of responsive, intuitive control design.

The first Pirates of the Caribbean game also had a weird-rear end default control scheme. Control the view with your mouse, left click to walk forwards, right click to walk backwards, shift to attack, space to block, q to shoot your pistol. It was like somebody looked at the classic wasd+mouse scheme and just decided to randomise all the functions.

Sit on my Jace
Sep 9, 2016

https://twitter.com/MallowyGoodness/status/921718275830173696

(I have no idea what game that is but there's a whole thread of screencaps if you click through. Highlights include a dedicated "sorry" button and a catgirl saying she loves sand "for reasons I can and cannot tell you about.")

OJ MIST 2 THE DICK
Sep 11, 2008

Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place
Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings
Take up shelter in the base of my spine
Sweet like a chica cherry cola

-Cheap Trick

Nap Ghost

Anil Dasharez0ne posted:

https://twitter.com/MallowyGoodness/status/921718275830173696

(I have no idea what game that is but there's a whole thread of screencaps if you click through. Highlights include a dedicated "sorry" button and a catgirl saying she loves sand "for reasons I can and cannot tell you about.")

crush crush

Truga
May 4, 2014
Lipstick Apathy

Dark_Swordmaster posted:

I play games with a large group on a Discord and the slow dawning of their binds (I think one guy's shooter movement binds were all in a row) has been mind blowing.

Mouse3 forward, z and x for strafing, space for doors/buttons and running backwards, shift for going fast, ctrl for jump, alt for crouch. Had this from doom1 days (hexen/quake2 added jump and crouch iirc) until mid 00s, when games like flashpoint started releasing and rebinding 3000 keys every reinstall was :effort:

Bieeanshee
Aug 21, 2000

Not keen on keening.


Grimey Drawer
I used the arrow pad and some combination of ZXC, CTRL, ALT and SPACE straight through Quake. When Unreal came out, I graduated to using the numpad, with the mouse on my left hand, and started adding binds to the math keys for 'flashlight' and 'reload' and 'whatever'. It took forever for me to finally move over to WASD.

Largepotato
Jan 18, 2007

Spurd.
Play the original Descent with only keyboard control.

Barry Convex
Sep 1, 2005

Think of the good things, Pim! The good things!

Like Jesus, candy, and crackerjacks! Ice cream and cake and lots o'laffs!
Grandma, Grandpa, and Uncle Joe! Larry, Curly, and brother Moe!
Hey, Morty! I just put myself into a copyright-infringing Unity asset flip!





quote:

In Piccle Ricc you have to find weapons, healing supplies and fight your way out from forgotten place such this mystery dungeon!
Main objective of the game is to gather supplies, beat all enemies and escape from dungeon!

Current features:
Hands on combat
Melee combat (including variety of weapons such as: sword, axe, etc.)
Custom inventory system
Pick up system
Players health
Players stamina
Aggressive A.I.
Dungeon

Features to come:
Co-Op Campaign
Free-for-all Multi-Player
Vehicles

FirstAidKite
Nov 8, 2009

Largepotato posted:

Play the original Descent with only keyboard control.

Hard mode: do so on a laptop keyboard that doesn't have a numpad

Olive!
Mar 16, 2015

It's not a ghost, but probably a 'living corpse'. The 'living dead' with a hell of a lot of bloodlust...
None of these control schemes are as awful to me as this poo poo roguelikes (notably Nethack) sometimes use:

code:
y k u
 \|/
h-.-l
 /|\
b j n
Go ahead and compare that movement diagram to where the keys actually are on the keyboard.

Double Punctuation
Dec 30, 2009

Ships were made for sinking;
Whiskey made for drinking;
If we were made of cellophane
We'd all get stinking drunk much faster!

Olive! posted:

None of these control schemes are as awful to me as this poo poo roguelikes (notably Nethack) sometimes use:

code:
y k u
 \|/
h-.-l
 /|\
b j n
Go ahead and compare that movement diagram to where the keys actually are on the keyboard.

They do that because those are the controls Unix terminals used before they had arrow keys. It’s still loving stupid, but there is a reason.

Eela6
May 25, 2007
Shredded Hen
Blame VIM.

Intoluene
Jul 6, 2011

Activating self-destruct sequence!
Fun Shoe

Yep. It's an idle clicker dating sim.

Cowcaster
Aug 7, 2002



there was a design consistency in the late 80's/early 90's when games were still trying to figure out how to deal with the concept of the mouse as a peripheral where they didn't quite understand that people could use both simultaneously. so a lot of games tried to do it where if you were using a mouse you had to use as few keyboard commands as possible, and if you were using a keyboard the mouse was non functional


il_cornuto
Oct 10, 2004

I like the way the controls are inverted for the keyboard but not the mouse, which if anything is exactly the wrong way round for a flight game.

anilEhilated
Feb 17, 2014

But I say fuck the rain.

Grimey Drawer

Largepotato posted:

Play the original Descent with only keyboard control.
I beat both Descents that way as a kid. I don't remember any difficulties but children can adapt more easily I guess.

Antivehicular
Dec 30, 2011


I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

Anil Dasharez0ne posted:

https://twitter.com/MallowyGoodness/status/921718275830173696

(I have no idea what game that is but there's a whole thread of screencaps if you click through. Highlights include a dedicated "sorry" button and a catgirl saying she loves sand "for reasons I can and cannot tell you about.")

People have talked about playing this game in this thread, perhaps ironically, but this thing has totally unironic sex scenes, so...

Bieeanshee
Aug 21, 2000

Not keen on keening.


Grimey Drawer

anilEhilated posted:

I beat both Descents that way as a kid. I don't remember any difficulties but children can adapt more easily I guess.

I played 'em like that too, though I moved like a toy tank.

Guy Mann
Mar 28, 2016

by Lowtax

Antivehicular posted:

People have talked about playing this game in this thread, perhaps ironically, but this thing has totally unironic sex scenes, so...

Crush Crush doesn't have any sex scenes, ironic or otherwise. It's an idle clicker game where each girl is introduced with a short little cutscene showing how you ruined their lives and then you have to work your way into their graces by doing a lot of clicking and watching meters fill up. It's a pretty obvious parody of dating sims and is pretty dumb aside from the joke character that is just a grizzly bear.

Antivehicular
Dec 30, 2011


I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

Guy Mann posted:

Crush Crush doesn't have any sex scenes, ironic or otherwise. It's an idle clicker game where each girl is introduced with a short little cutscene showing how you ruined their lives and then you have to work your way into their graces by doing a lot of clicking and watching meters fill up. It's a pretty obvious parody of dating sims and is pretty dumb aside from the joke character that is just a grizzly bear.

I've never played this thing, but the wiki for this game (of course it has a wiki) describes sex scenes for each of the romance candidates -- just a paragraph or so, but definitely not joke sex scenes. Is that crazy-rear end wiki fanfiction?

Sit on my Jace
Sep 9, 2016

Antivehicular posted:

I've never played this thing, but the wiki for this game (of course it has a wiki) describes sex scenes for each of the romance candidates -- just a paragraph or so, but definitely not joke sex scenes. Is that crazy-rear end wiki fanfiction?

I looked this up because I don't value my time, and it's the standard Steam situation where they exist but you have to either get the game from somewhere else or download a patch from the web to get to them.

Discendo Vox
Mar 21, 2013

We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.
There was, regrettably, an update which added nudity and sex to a premium version of the game. The free version remains wonderful since I can romance a photorealistic bear. Named "Bearverly".

edit: I appreciate that the more sexualized characters are constantly mocking the player- "that movie date cost you a million dollars? How hosed up is this game's economy!?" "hey, thanks for the thousand cars, I dumped them all in the trash."

Discendo Vox fucked around with this message at 15:47 on Oct 22, 2017

an actual dog
Nov 18, 2014

hell yea everyone it's Vitamin Girl

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_cXRh1NWOBk

Cicadas!
Oct 27, 2010



A Pepsiman knockoff, what a time to be alive.

e: sorry, sepsiman.

Antivehicular
Dec 30, 2011


I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

It looks like somebody put at least half an rear end into that project, which is kind of amazing in this thread

Guy Mann
Mar 28, 2016

by Lowtax

Discendo Vox posted:

There was, regrettably, an update which added nudity and sex to a premium version of the game. The free version remains wonderful since I can romance a photorealistic bear. Named "Bearverly".

Well that's awful and also completely unsurprising.

Gynovore
Jun 17, 2009

Forget your RoboCoX or your StickyCoX or your EvilCoX, MY CoX has Blinking Bewbs!

WHY IS THIS GAME DEAD?!

Antivehicular posted:

It looks like somebody put at least half an rear end into that project, which is kind of amazing in this thread

They also used the Unreal 4 engine, which costs six figures when used in a for-profit game. So, at least 5/8 of an rear end, maybe even as much as 7/8.

Owl Inspector
Sep 14, 2011

Gynovore posted:

They also used the Unreal 4 engine, which costs six figures when used in a for-profit game. So, at least 5/8 of an rear end, maybe even as much as 7/8.

An unreal 4 license amounts to a 5% royalty on gross revenue over the first $3000 per quarter.

Barry Convex
Sep 1, 2005

Think of the good things, Pim! The good things!

Like Jesus, candy, and crackerjacks! Ice cream and cake and lots o'laffs!
Grandma, Grandpa, and Uncle Joe! Larry, Curly, and brother Moe!

Digirat posted:

An unreal 4 license amounts to a 5% royalty on gross revenue over the first $3000 per quarter.

I thought that sounded wrong. I think Epic's licensing terms used to be much less favorable to indie development, but while UE4 isn't as ubiquitous as Unity, it's used in far too many low-budget games for a fee that high to be plausible.

AnoHito
May 8, 2014

Antivehicular posted:

It looks like somebody put at least half an rear end into that project, which is kind of amazing in this thread

Weird, because it seems like this thread mostly talks about games that put at least one full rear end in them

:rimshot:

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

AnoHito posted:

Weird, because it seems like this thread mostly talks about games that put at least one full rear end in them

:rimshot:
You'll pay for the whole rear end... but you'll only need the hole!!!

Nckdictator
Sep 8, 2006
Just..someone
http://store.steampowered.com/app/696470/?snr=1_5_9__205

Do you want a cute girlfriend? Have you ever dreamed of dating Korean girl? Here is ‘real’ Korean girlfriend, Sehyun. You can date Sehyun anytime you want in the VR world! Enjoy the dating in her house. You can complement her, and express your love. Make her feel loved. The more she feels loved, the more adorable she acts.


You can get Love Point(LP) through talking with her. LP means how much She feels love towards you. Depend on LP, Sehyun reacts differently to your action. Save LP and ask her to show Aegyo and dance. Maybe she’ll kiss you first.

Scaramouche
Mar 26, 2001

SPACE FACE! SPACE FACE!

The LP forum suddenly vindicated

Hwurmp
May 20, 2005

I do love a good set of 'gyos

Barry Convex
Sep 1, 2005

Think of the good things, Pim! The good things!

Like Jesus, candy, and crackerjacks! Ice cream and cake and lots o'laffs!
Grandma, Grandpa, and Uncle Joe! Larry, Curly, and brother Moe!
http://store.steampowered.com/app/734140/Kekistan_This_is_War/

quote:

This is War! You, as a Kekistani half human, half robot has to go back in time and change it once and for all!

The year is 2035, Kekistani scientists finally figured out a way on how to travel in time. Thus, by having a pressure from Normies, they have created you, half human - half robot Kekistani Terminator! Your main objective is to travel back in time and kill as many Normies as possible.

The main objective of the game is to kill as many Normies as possible. This is basically a "skirmish" game, which means you have to fight till you die. Gain most kills, best score and get it done with a little time as possible.

Instruction Manuel
May 15, 2007

Yes, it is what it looks like!


Lol, some cyborg. Can't even kill a bunch of normies without succumbing to attrition.

Sit on my Jace
Sep 9, 2016

Scaramouche posted:

The LP forum suddenly vindicated

Intriguingly moe...

I dont know
Aug 9, 2003

That Guy here...
I'm not sure what Kekistan refers to, but based on that flag I assume it's some kind of white power thing?

Munchables
Feb 8, 2015

Ask/tell me about legal cannibalism

I dont know posted:

I'm not sure what Kekistan refers to, but based on that flag I assume it's some kind of white power thing?

Kekistan is a fictional country that 4chan and various alt-righters use as a ralllying flag because they like to say "kek"

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Fur20
Nov 14, 2007

すご▞い!
君は働か░い
フ▙▓ズなんだね!

and kek itself originates from world of warcraft, where their ciphering system to prevent alliance and horde players from communicating effectively with one another filtered "lol" to "kek"

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