FASTFOODHOUSE 6: Sandwich Montoya: Prepare to Rye

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > FASTFOODHOUSE 6: Sandwich Montoya: Prepare to Rye

«‹›51 »

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

goddammit the olives facing different directions just got me again

# ? Oct 31, 2017 23:40

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 11, 2024 13:44

CrocodileKingSaysNO: Jul 25, 2007

Dude look like a sandwich

# ? Oct 31, 2017 23:47

Qwijib0: Apr 10, 2007; Who needs on-field skills when you can dance like this?; Fun Shoe

Mel Mudkiper posted:

How does it stay funny

calcium propionate, sodium benzoate, and potassium sorbate.

# ? Nov 1, 2017 00:20

Hockles: Dec 25, 2007; Resident of ~~Camp Blood~~
Crystal Lake

iospace posted:

Febreeze. You know what you need to do with what just happened with the Browns.

Dibs on being the dangling feet.

# ? Nov 1, 2017 00:34

Duke Chin: Jan 11, 2002; _{^{Roger That:}}
MILK CRATES INBOUND

_{_{^{- FUCK THE HABS -}}}

Qwijib0 posted:

calcium propionate, sodium benzoate, and potassium sorbate.

# ? Nov 1, 2017 00:36

sean10mm: Jun 29, 2005; It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, MAD-2R World

My Luck's a vegetable
He lives in a hospital
But Colts won't do anything
To keep him alive

He has a green TV
It's called an EKG
But Colts won't do anything
To keep him alive

He has no arms or legs
That's why we call him pegs
But Colts won't do anything
To keep him alive

Sometimes I play a joke
Pull the plug and watch him choke
But Colts won't do anything
To keep him alive

Each time he breaths in air
He sounds like Darth Vader
But Colts won't do anything
To keep him alive

He prefers pureed food
Sucks it down with a plastic tube
But Colts won't do anything
To keep him alive

# ? Nov 2, 2017 20:43

AAAAA! Real Muenster: Jul 12, 2008; My QB is also named Bort

http://www.thedrawplay.com/comic/jimmy-garoppolo-gets-traded/
You forgot the Jaguars / Dareus trade :colbert:

# ? Nov 4, 2017 17:59

CyberPingu: Sep 15, 2013; If you're not striving to improve, you'll end up going backwards.

AAAAA! Real Muenster posted:

http://www.thedrawplay.com/comic/jimmy-garoppolo-gets-traded/
You forgot the Jaguars

Everyone forgets the Jags

# ? Nov 4, 2017 18:47

AAAAA! Real Muenster: Jul 12, 2008; My QB is also named Bort

CyberPingu posted:

Everyone forgets the Jags

No thats the Titans.

# ? Nov 4, 2017 19:01

mllaneza: Apr 28, 2007; Veteran, Bermuda Triangle Expeditionary Force, 1993-1952

sean10mm posted:

But Colts won't do anything
To keep him alive

very nice !

# ? Nov 4, 2017 20:42

Febreeze: Oct 24, 2011; I want to care, butt I dont

Proud of those 3 panels in the middle of this one

http://www.thedrawplay.com/comic/jameis-winston-gives-a-speech/

# ? Nov 9, 2017 17:39

Joey Freshwater: Jun 20, 2004; Always playing with my meat; Grimey Drawer

Febreeze posted:

Proud of those 3 panels in the middle of this one

http://www.thedrawplay.com/comic/jameis-winston-gives-a-speech/

If I wasn't waiting on Butch to get fired to get a new avatar, I would get one of those immediately.

# ? Nov 9, 2017 17:51

Mel Mudkiper: Jan 19, 2012; At this point, Mudman abruptly ends the conversation. He usually insists on the last word.

Febreeze posted:

Proud of those 3 panels in the middle of this one

http://www.thedrawplay.com/comic/jameis-winston-gives-a-speech/

how many times did you look at Jameis Winston eating his fingers frame by frame to get the art right

# ? Nov 9, 2017 17:53

FUCKFACE MORON: Apr 23, 2010; by sebmojo

# ? Nov 9, 2017 17:55

Joey Freshwater: Jun 20, 2004; Always playing with my meat; Grimey Drawer

Eli Wiggum posted:

Jesus if one of the other Bucs posters doesn't take this I'm gonna save it and use it later.

Only way it would be better is if it was a .gif of his facial expressions from panels 2-8.

# ? Nov 9, 2017 17:58

Kalli: Jun 2, 2001

Today's comic was very upsetting to me

# ? Nov 9, 2017 17:58

StupidSexyMothman: Aug 9, 2010

Eli Wiggum posted:

Eating the W leaves only an L. A Good Cartoon.

# ? Nov 9, 2017 18:04

Chilichimp: Oct 24, 2006; TIE Adv xWampa

It wamp, and it stomp; Grimey Drawer

Kalli posted:

Today's comic was very upsetting to me

- A Patriots fan

# ? Nov 9, 2017 18:08

VanSandman: Feb 16, 2011; SWAP.AVI EXCHANGER

AAAAA! Real Muenster posted:

No thats the Titans.

Do you think the movie was a desperate cry for help that people only thought was a high-school football flick?

# ? Nov 9, 2017 18:12

FUCKFACE MORON: Apr 23, 2010; by sebmojo

Kalli posted:

Today's comic was very upsetting to me

Why?

# ? Nov 9, 2017 18:34

Hockles: Dec 25, 2007; Resident of ~~Camp Blood~~
Crystal Lake

Febreeze posted:

Touch this W... Touch this W....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aDTwO0TlwOU

# ? Nov 9, 2017 18:48

Kalli: Jun 2, 2001

just something about those wet fingers and the faces he's making.

I mean that in the tone of June Diane Raphael looking at Sean Connery in Zardoz.

# ? Nov 9, 2017 18:50

whypick1: Dec 18, 2009; Just another jackass on the Internet

Hockles posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aDTwO0TlwOU

I need to re-re-watch this series.

# ? Nov 9, 2017 18:51

Kalli: Jun 2, 2001

whypick1 posted:

I need to re-re-watch this series.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I9y9lSMLK2U

# ? Nov 9, 2017 18:54

GonadTheBallbarian: Jul 23, 2007

whypick1 posted:

I need to re-re-watch this series.

it's one of those shows that died too soon

# ? Nov 9, 2017 19:09

Kalli: Jun 2, 2001

They did a few webisodes at some point that had some, but not enough of the magic.

Shame a bunch of the cast has passed on... man, that show was so long ago now.

# ? Nov 9, 2017 19:12

GonadTheBallbarian: Jul 23, 2007

Kalli posted:

They did a few webisodes at some point that had some, but not enough of the magic.

Shame a bunch of the cast has passed on... man, that show was so long ago now.

I mean even the VA crew showed up in a bunch of other stuff since then

but yeah

# ? Nov 9, 2017 19:13

Kalli: Jun 2, 2001

Man, the Critic really had 2017 figured out

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t48Qt5nGCQs

# ? Nov 9, 2017 19:19

Mel Mudkiper: Jan 19, 2012; At this point, Mudman abruptly ends the conversation. He usually insists on the last word.

Kalli posted:

just something about those wet fingers and the faces he's making.

I mean that in the tone of June Diane Raphael looking at Sean Connery in Zardoz.

That is a good reference

I like that reference

# ? Nov 9, 2017 22:09

VanSandman: Feb 16, 2011; SWAP.AVI EXCHANGER

This is a thing now, Jags fans.

# ? Nov 9, 2017 22:14

AAAAA! Real Muenster: Jul 12, 2008; My QB is also named Bort

VanSandman posted:

This is a thing now, Jags fans.

It is a work of art.

# ? Nov 10, 2017 02:06

Shangri-Law School: Feb 19, 2013

I had an idea.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6pex_ASYQPM

Well my daddy left home when I was wee
And he didn't leave much in the 313
Just an old football and an empty bottle of booze
Now I don't blame him 'cause he run and hid
But the meanest thing that he ever did
Was before he left, he passed on the Honolulu blue

Well, he must o' thought that is quite a joke
And it got a lot of pity from a' lots of folk
It seems men bought me drinks my whole life through
Some Bears fan would say something mean
And some Pack fan'd gloat, "Oh-and-sixteen!"
I tell ya, life ain't easy for the Honolulu blue

Well, I grew up quick, and I grew up jaded
My expectations sank and my hopes faded
Gave up any thought of the Super Bowl dream
But I made me a vow to Calvin and Barry
I'd search from September to February
And kill that man who gave me that awful team

Well, it was 'round week nine when the season crumbled
And I just hit town and my stomach rumbled
I thought I'd stop and find something to chew
At a Coney Island just off of Cass
There in the parking lot, eating rear end
Sat the dirty dog who passed me the Honolulu blue

Well, I knew that snake was my own sweet dad
From a worn-out picture that my mother'd had
And I knew that Lions hat and his evil eye
He was big and fat and gray and old
And I looked at him and my blood ran cold
And I said: "Honolulu blue! How do you do!?
Now you gonna die!"
Yeah that's what I told 'em

Well, I hit him hard right between the eyes
And he dropped like Ebron, but to my surprise
He come up with a knife and cut off a piece of my ear
But I busted a bottle right across his teeth
And we rolled off the sidewalk and into the street
Kicking and a' gouging with a thud in the blood and the beer

I tell ya, I've fought tougher men
But I really can't remember when
He snapped like Don Muhlbach and hit like, uh, Glover Quin
I heard him laugh and then I heard him cuss
He went for his gun and I pulled mine first
He stood there lookin' at me and I saw him grin

And he said, "Son, football is rough
And if a fan's gonna make it, he's gotta be tough
And I know I wouldn't be there to help ya along
So I give ya that team and I said goodbye
I knew you'd have to get tough or die
And it's that team that helped to make you strong."

Yeah he said, "Now you just fought one hell of a fight
And I know you hate me, and you got the right
To kill me now; you could stomp on me like Suh
But ya ought to thank me, you can't debate
That you're tough like Stafford and strong like Tate
'Cause I'm the bastard that gave you the Honolulu blue"
Yeah what could I do, what could I do?

I got all choked up and I threw down my gun
Called him my Pa, and he called me his son
And I went off to Ford Field to get a decent view
And I think about him, now and then
Every time they lose and every time they win
And if I ever have a son, I think I'll make him root for
The Bills, or Jags! Any drat team but the Lions! I still hate that team!

# ? Nov 10, 2017 02:18

Randaconda: Jul 3, 2014; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Shangri-Law School posted:

I had an idea.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6pex_ASYQPM

Well my daddy left home when I was wee
And he didn't leave much in the 313
Just an old football and an empty bottle of booze
Now I don't blame him 'cause he run and hid
But the meanest thing that he ever did
Was before he left, he passed on the Honolulu blue

Well, he must o' thought that is quite a joke
And it got a lot of pity from a' lots of folk
It seems men bought me drinks my whole life through
Some Bears fan would say something mean
And some Pack fan'd gloat, "Oh-and-sixteen!"
I tell ya, life ain't easy for the Honolulu blue

Well, I grew up quick, and I grew up jaded
My expectations sank and my hopes faded
Gave up any thought of the Super Bowl dream
But I made me a vow to Calvin and Barry
I'd search from September to February
And kill that man who gave me that awful team

Well, it was 'round week nine when the season crumbled
And I just hit town and my stomach rumbled
I thought I'd stop and find something to chew
At a Coney Island just off of Cass
There in the parking lot, eating rear end
Sat the dirty dog who passed me the Honolulu blue

Well, I knew that snake was my own sweet dad
From a worn-out picture that my mother'd had
And I knew that Lions hat and his evil eye
He was big and fat and gray and old
And I looked at him and my blood ran cold
And I said: "Honolulu blue! How do you do!?
Now you gonna die!"
Yeah that's what I told 'em

Well, I hit him hard right between the eyes
And he dropped like Ebron, but to my surprise
He come up with a knife and cut off a piece of my ear
But I busted a bottle right across his teeth
And we rolled off the sidewalk and into the street
Kicking and a' gouging with a thud in the blood and the beer

I tell ya, I've fought tougher men
But I really can't remember when
He snapped like Don Muhlbach and hit like, uh, Glover Quin
I heard him laugh and then I heard him cuss
He went for his gun and I pulled mine first
He stood there lookin' at me and I saw him grin

And he said, "Son, football is rough
And if a fan's gonna make it, he's gotta be tough
And I know I wouldn't be there to help ya along
So I give ya that team and I said goodbye
I knew you'd have to get tough or die
And it's that team that helped to make you strong."

Yeah he said, "Now you just fought one hell of a fight
And I know you hate me, and you got the right
To kill me now; you could stomp on me like Suh
But ya ought to thank me, you can't debate
That you're tough like Stafford and strong like Tate
'Cause I'm the bastard that gave you the Honolulu blue"
Yeah what could I do, what could I do?

I got all choked up and I threw down my gun
Called him my Pa, and he called me his son
And I went off to Ford Field to get a decent view
And I think about him, now and then
Every time they lose and every time they win
And if I ever have a son, I think I'll make him root for
The Bills, or Jags! Any drat team but the Lions! I still hate that team!

# ? Nov 10, 2017 02:20

Filthy Casual: Aug 13, 2014

Shangri-Law School posted:

I had an idea.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6pex_ASYQPM

Well my daddy left home when I was wee
And he didn't leave much in the 313
Just an old football and an empty bottle of booze
Now I don't blame him 'cause he run and hid
But the meanest thing that he ever did
Was before he left, he passed on the Honolulu blue

Well, he must o' thought that is quite a joke
And it got a lot of pity from a' lots of folk
It seems men bought me drinks my whole life through
Some Bears fan would say something mean
And some Pack fan'd gloat, "Oh-and-sixteen!"
I tell ya, life ain't easy for the Honolulu blue

Well, I grew up quick, and I grew up jaded
My expectations sank and my hopes faded
Gave up any thought of the Super Bowl dream
But I made me a vow to Calvin and Barry
I'd search from September to February
And kill that man who gave me that awful team

Well, it was 'round week nine when the season crumbled
And I just hit town and my stomach rumbled
I thought I'd stop and find something to chew
At a Coney Island just off of Cass
There in the parking lot, eating rear end
Sat the dirty dog who passed me the Honolulu blue

Well, I knew that snake was my own sweet dad
From a worn-out picture that my mother'd had
And I knew that Lions hat and his evil eye
He was big and fat and gray and old
And I looked at him and my blood ran cold
And I said: "Honolulu blue! How do you do!?
Now you gonna die!"
Yeah that's what I told 'em

Well, I hit him hard right between the eyes
And he dropped like Ebron, but to my surprise
He come up with a knife and cut off a piece of my ear
But I busted a bottle right across his teeth
And we rolled off the sidewalk and into the street
Kicking and a' gouging with a thud in the blood and the beer

I tell ya, I've fought tougher men
But I really can't remember when
He snapped like Don Muhlbach and hit like, uh, Glover Quin
I heard him laugh and then I heard him cuss
He went for his gun and I pulled mine first
He stood there lookin' at me and I saw him grin

And he said, "Son, football is rough
And if a fan's gonna make it, he's gotta be tough
And I know I wouldn't be there to help ya along
So I give ya that team and I said goodbye
I knew you'd have to get tough or die
And it's that team that helped to make you strong."

Yeah he said, "Now you just fought one hell of a fight
And I know you hate me, and you got the right
To kill me now; you could stomp on me like Suh
But ya ought to thank me, you can't debate
That you're tough like Stafford and strong like Tate
'Cause I'm the bastard that gave you the Honolulu blue"
Yeah what could I do, what could I do?

I got all choked up and I threw down my gun
Called him my Pa, and he called me his son
And I went off to Ford Field to get a decent view
And I think about him, now and then
Every time they lose and every time they win
And if I ever have a son, I think I'll make him root for
The Bills, or Jags! Any drat team but the Lions! I still hate that team!

Bless you.

# ? Nov 10, 2017 02:36

The X-man cometh: Nov 1, 2009

# ? Nov 10, 2017 06:10

Darth Brooks: Jan 15, 2005; I do not wear this mask to protect me. I wear it to protect you from me.

That is awesome.

# ? Nov 10, 2017 07:08

Acebuckeye13: Nov 2, 2010; Against All Tyrants; Ultra Carp

Shangri-Law School posted:

I had an idea.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6pex_ASYQPM

Well my daddy left home when I was wee
And he didn't leave much in the 313
Just an old football and an empty bottle of booze
Now I don't blame him 'cause he run and hid
But the meanest thing that he ever did
Was before he left, he passed on the Honolulu blue

Well, he must o' thought that is quite a joke
And it got a lot of pity from a' lots of folk
It seems men bought me drinks my whole life through
Some Bears fan would say something mean
And some Pack fan'd gloat, "Oh-and-sixteen!"
I tell ya, life ain't easy for the Honolulu blue

Well, I grew up quick, and I grew up jaded
My expectations sank and my hopes faded
Gave up any thought of the Super Bowl dream
But I made me a vow to Calvin and Barry
I'd search from September to February
And kill that man who gave me that awful team

Well, it was 'round week nine when the season crumbled
And I just hit town and my stomach rumbled
I thought I'd stop and find something to chew
At a Coney Island just off of Cass
There in the parking lot, eating rear end
Sat the dirty dog who passed me the Honolulu blue

Well, I knew that snake was my own sweet dad
From a worn-out picture that my mother'd had
And I knew that Lions hat and his evil eye
He was big and fat and gray and old
And I looked at him and my blood ran cold
And I said: "Honolulu blue! How do you do!?
Now you gonna die!"
Yeah that's what I told 'em

Well, I hit him hard right between the eyes
And he dropped like Ebron, but to my surprise
He come up with a knife and cut off a piece of my ear
But I busted a bottle right across his teeth
And we rolled off the sidewalk and into the street
Kicking and a' gouging with a thud in the blood and the beer

I tell ya, I've fought tougher men
But I really can't remember when
He snapped like Don Muhlbach and hit like, uh, Glover Quin
I heard him laugh and then I heard him cuss
He went for his gun and I pulled mine first
He stood there lookin' at me and I saw him grin

And he said, "Son, football is rough
And if a fan's gonna make it, he's gotta be tough
And I know I wouldn't be there to help ya along
So I give ya that team and I said goodbye
I knew you'd have to get tough or die
And it's that team that helped to make you strong."

Yeah he said, "Now you just fought one hell of a fight
And I know you hate me, and you got the right
To kill me now; you could stomp on me like Suh
But ya ought to thank me, you can't debate
That you're tough like Stafford and strong like Tate
'Cause I'm the bastard that gave you the Honolulu blue"
Yeah what could I do, what could I do?

I got all choked up and I threw down my gun
Called him my Pa, and he called me his son
And I went off to Ford Field to get a decent view
And I think about him, now and then
Every time they lose and every time they win
And if I ever have a son, I think I'll make him root for
The Bills, or Jags! Any drat team but the Lions! I still hate that team!

Absolutely

loving

Incredible

# ? Nov 10, 2017 16:47

Febreeze: Oct 24, 2011; I want to care, butt I dont

We tried a little something different this week on The Draw Play podcast, and it is very stupid and murdered my throat
https://m.soundcloud.com/david-rappoccio-950910196/intentional-sounding-83-tom-savage-private-eye

# ? Nov 10, 2017 21:39

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

That was legitimately hilarious. You guys are very creative

And I got back to back podcast shoutouts for my the exorcist reference :c00l:

# ? Nov 10, 2017 21:43

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 11, 2024 13:44

Volkerball: Oct 15, 2009; by FactsAreUseless

Shangri-Law School posted:

I had an idea.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6pex_ASYQPM

Well my daddy left home when I was wee
And he didn't leave much in the 313
Just an old football and an empty bottle of booze
Now I don't blame him 'cause he run and hid
But the meanest thing that he ever did
Was before he left, he passed on the Honolulu blue

Well, he must o' thought that is quite a joke
And it got a lot of pity from a' lots of folk
It seems men bought me drinks my whole life through
Some Bears fan would say something mean
And some Pack fan'd gloat, "Oh-and-sixteen!"
I tell ya, life ain't easy for the Honolulu blue

Well, I grew up quick, and I grew up jaded
My expectations sank and my hopes faded
Gave up any thought of the Super Bowl dream
But I made me a vow to Calvin and Barry
I'd search from September to February
And kill that man who gave me that awful team

Well, it was 'round week nine when the season crumbled
And I just hit town and my stomach rumbled
I thought I'd stop and find something to chew
At a Coney Island just off of Cass
There in the parking lot, eating rear end
Sat the dirty dog who passed me the Honolulu blue

Well, I knew that snake was my own sweet dad
From a worn-out picture that my mother'd had
And I knew that Lions hat and his evil eye
He was big and fat and gray and old
And I looked at him and my blood ran cold
And I said: "Honolulu blue! How do you do!?
Now you gonna die!"
Yeah that's what I told 'em

Well, I hit him hard right between the eyes
And he dropped like Ebron, but to my surprise
He come up with a knife and cut off a piece of my ear
But I busted a bottle right across his teeth
And we rolled off the sidewalk and into the street
Kicking and a' gouging with a thud in the blood and the beer

I tell ya, I've fought tougher men
But I really can't remember when
He snapped like Don Muhlbach and hit like, uh, Glover Quin
I heard him laugh and then I heard him cuss
He went for his gun and I pulled mine first
He stood there lookin' at me and I saw him grin

And he said, "Son, football is rough
And if a fan's gonna make it, he's gotta be tough
And I know I wouldn't be there to help ya along
So I give ya that team and I said goodbye
I knew you'd have to get tough or die
And it's that team that helped to make you strong."

Yeah he said, "Now you just fought one hell of a fight
And I know you hate me, and you got the right
To kill me now; you could stomp on me like Suh
But ya ought to thank me, you can't debate
That you're tough like Stafford and strong like Tate
'Cause I'm the bastard that gave you the Honolulu blue"
Yeah what could I do, what could I do?

I got all choked up and I threw down my gun
Called him my Pa, and he called me his son
And I went off to Ford Field to get a decent view
And I think about him, now and then
Every time they lose and every time they win
And if I ever have a son, I think I'll make him root for
The Bills, or Jags! Any drat team but the Lions! I still hate that team!

Owns

# ? Nov 10, 2017 21:44

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > FASTFOODHOUSE 6: Sandwich Montoya: Prepare to Rye

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