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quote:I need to get out of here...anyone need a analytical chemist pretending to be a NMR spectroscopist? How do you feel about living in a cardboard box for $2000 a month? Lotsa chemist jobs out here! 
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Nov 27, 2017 20:59
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Sundae posted:How do you feel about living in a cardboard box for $2000 a month? Lotsa chemist jobs out here! I feel like this is a meth joke of some kind.
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Nov 27, 2017 21:06
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Sundae posted:How do you feel about living in a cardboard box for $2000 a month? Lotsa chemist jobs out here! Basically if you don’t already own property or aren’t a DINK six figures plus each, good luck finding a 
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Nov 27, 2017 21:08
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Zil posted:I feel like this is a meth joke of some kind. Nah, it's a California Joke. But hey, now that you mention it, he could park a trailer up in Humbolt County and supplement his income a bit...
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Nov 27, 2017 21:46
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Sundae posted:Nah, it's a California Joke. Chemists do Fresno, Botanists do Humbolt
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Nov 27, 2017 21:52
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I was told by a fortune 5 VP that being willing to be mobile is good for your career. Seems like the trend of silicon valley RVs as permanent homes is just another example of California being ahead of the curve. In all seriousness though, how can you get drunk in your rv without running afoul of dui laws?
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Nov 27, 2017 21:53
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Sundae posted:How do you feel about living in a cardboard box for $2000 a month? Lotsa chemist jobs out here! I just turned down a job in SF for this reason. I'm not leaving low six figures in Chicago for slightly more low six figures in SF with housing prices like that.
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Nov 27, 2017 22:45
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Tnuctip posted:I was told by a fortune 5 VP that being willing to be mobile is good for your career. Seems like the trend of silicon valley RVs as permanent homes is just another example of California being ahead of the curve. In all seriousness though, how can you get drunk in your rv without running afoul of dui laws? Probably easily, don't sit in the loving driver seat.
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Nov 28, 2017 02:12
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Sundae posted:How do you feel about living in a cardboard box for $2000 a month? Lotsa chemist jobs out here! A tempting offer, especially when you factor in the possibilities of a meth side gig but I'm not sure I want to move to a state that is perpetually on fire and waiting to sink into the ocean. I want to get away from snow so I've been applying down in North Carolina but so far haven't heard back, I imagine they all notice the New York address and say "he's gonna want relocation and a lot of money" and file the resume in the trash bin. So for now I just keep sending applications all over, make offerings to Marduk for something to stick and hope my doctor will let me start drinking again.
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Nov 28, 2017 12:26
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"when it says 'list the total licenses' does that mean the sum of what they have now and what we're adding?" What do you think a total is?! 
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Nov 28, 2017 16:42
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Shrieking Muppet posted:A tempting offer, especially when you factor in the possibilities of a meth side gig but I'm not sure I want to move to a state that is perpetually on fire and waiting to sink into the ocean. Ditch the address portion of your resume, make up a reason you want to move (family in the area, maybe?), and if you don’t need relocation mention that off the bat in that conversation.
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Nov 28, 2017 17:24
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22 Eargesplitten posted:Ditch the address portion of your resume, make up a reason you want to move (family in the area, maybe?), and if you don’t need relocation mention that off the bat in that conversation. I could do that but what about the address field in the online application?
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Nov 28, 2017 18:18
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"Citizen of the World" Solved!
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Nov 28, 2017 18:38
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Shrieking Muppet posted:A tempting offer, especially when you factor in the possibilities of a meth side gig but I'm not sure I want to move to a state that is perpetually on fire and waiting to sink into the ocean. Im in the same boat, but looking at moving to texas instead. Even for jobs where relocation is offered, havent gotten one bite, only midwest firms. I figure if Lockheed rejects my 100th app balloons will fall from the ceiling and theyll say to themselves, this guy has gumption lets get him on the horn.
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Nov 28, 2017 20:05
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Tnuctip posted:Im in the same boat, but looking at moving to texas instead. Even for jobs where relocation is offered, havent gotten one bite, only midwest firms. I figure if Lockheed rejects my 100th app balloons will fall from the ceiling and theyll say to themselves, this guy has gumption lets get him on the horn. What the hell happened to Lockheed that they're not offering relo anymore? Several of my friends got jobs there back in 2007/2008 in the prime of the financial downturn and even they were getting $15Kish signing bonuses and full relo packages.
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Nov 28, 2017 20:34
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Shrieking Muppet posted:I could do that but what about the address field in the online application? Sorry, wasn’t thinking about online applications. 90% of what I apply to is resume and cover letter only.
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Nov 28, 2017 21:16
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Sundae posted:What the hell happened to Lockheed that they're not offering relo anymore? Several of my friends got jobs there back in 2007/2008 in the prime of the financial downturn and even they were getting $15Kish signing bonuses and full relo packages. They still offer it for the types of jobs im applying too. Besides the fact that i dont have any contacts there, dont work in aerospace, didnt go to one of their approved feeder schools, and work in filthy metalcasting, its going great! Ill hit my dozenth and a halfth rejection letter in no time!
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Nov 28, 2017 21:35
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Just got this message sent to our general email box (we're an IT staffing agency):quote:(Name of one of our recruiters), All the recruiter told him was that he was overqualified - it's a junior position and his experience clearly makes him a senior candidate, and he was asking way more than the client is willing to pay. I know recruiters aren't well liked in this thread, but still, some people have no human decency. Thankfully our bosses always have our backs. Edit: oh my god I just saw his email signature, this guy is an amazing tool: quote:"YOU WILL KNOW THEM BY THEIR FRUITS" (Matt 7:15-23) Rotten Red Rod fucked around with this message at 22:08 on Nov 28, 2017 |
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Nov 28, 2017 22:05
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Rotten Red Rod posted:Just got this message sent to our general email box (we're an IT staffing agency): In his defense, he certainly doesnt write like he deserves senior level pay. Are you allowed to reply “youre not my buddy, friend?”
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Nov 28, 2017 22:21
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22 Eargesplitten posted:Sorry, wasn’t thinking about online applications. 90% of what I apply to is resume and cover letter only. What on earth do you apply too where this is still the standard?
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Nov 29, 2017 00:06
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IT jobs. Suck it, non STEM types 
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Nov 29, 2017 01:23
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https://twitter.com/latimes/status/935696090434883590
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Nov 29, 2017 03:28
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Is there anybody left? Or are all men in media sexual predators?
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Nov 29, 2017 17:04
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BigDave posted:Is there anybody left? Or are all men in media sexual predators? Only give up hope when Tom Hanks falls.
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Nov 29, 2017 17:08
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GrandpaPants posted:Only give up hope when Tom Hanks falls. Don't tempt fate.
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Nov 29, 2017 17:16
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BigDave posted:Is there anybody left? Or are all men in media sexual predators?  Basically just Tom Hanks at this point. Also, Mister Rogers maybe? (Please god, no Fred.)
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Nov 29, 2017 17:26
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FrozenVent posted:Don't tempt fate. It's simple. He can't. His one wanna-be rapper son, OTOH...
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Nov 29, 2017 17:28
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Catered lunch delivered at reception. $3.45 balance. Unsure if includes tip. Argument over which card to use. Petty cash? An option. The account payable department and director of sourcing are on the case. Four employees for fifteen minutes.
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Nov 29, 2017 17:47
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FrozenVent posted:Catered lunch delivered at reception. This reads like if Rorschach got an office job
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Nov 29, 2017 17:50
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Sundae posted:
I would hate to learn that Mr Rogers molested Daniel Tiger.
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Nov 29, 2017 17:52
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Sundae posted:Basically just Tom Hanks at this point. Also, Mister Rogers maybe? (Please god, no Fred.) Keanu too.
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Nov 29, 2017 17:54
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therobit posted:I would hate to learn that Mr Rogers molested Daniel Tiger. Well Mr. Rogers was Daniel's puppeteer, so that entirely depends on what you think is the appropriate way to touch a puppet.
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Nov 29, 2017 17:56
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Ashcans posted:Well Mr. Rogers was Daniel's puppeteer, so that entirely depends on what you think is the appropriate way to touch a puppet. Just because he is a puppet does not make it OK to treat him like a meat puppet.
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Nov 29, 2017 18:00
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Shugojin posted:This reads like if Rorschach got an office job Adventures of Rorschach in HR would be a daily read for me.
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Nov 29, 2017 18:00
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18 Character Limit posted:Adventures of Rorschach in HR would be a daily read for me. The accumulated filth of all their whining and catered lunches will foam up about their waists and all the admins and Sundaes will look up and shout “Save us!” And I’ll whisper “No.”
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Nov 29, 2017 18:07
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My team at work got an extra person added a while back. It really helped to get the workload better distributed, and things have been pretty great as a result. Plus, a procedural change coming up is going to eliminate some busywork that was being generated for no good reason. It's nice! The (significantly larger) team on the other side of the cubicle wall, on the other hand, who already didn't have time to get maintenance stuff done (we had some downtime so we did a big re-filing project for them, and also got months of old documents set up to be shipped out for long-term storage) are being told that they can't have any work held over from day to day, so they need to work faster, and also make fewer mistakes. Frustration and tempers are flaring all over the place. I'm torn between human empathy and "thank god that's not me". The Lord of Hats fucked around with this message at 19:16 on Nov 29, 2017 |
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Nov 29, 2017 19:07
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Shugojin posted:This reads like if Rorschach got an office job The admin leans into the office, asking if I have change. I look up from my spreadsheet and whisper "no". Payroll clerk bites into a fish sandwich. Spits it back out screaming. Does not like fish.
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Nov 29, 2017 19:19
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The Lord of Hats posted:I'm torn between human empathy and "thank god that's not me".
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Nov 29, 2017 19:25
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The sweet ride of mileage money has been rescinded. After being bought out, our company got about 10 weeks of nearly double the previous rate. There was an announcement over the weekend that the rate was going back to the old one. No explanation was given, but it's assumed by our site that the new company had no idea how spread out we are and how for some departments, it's a minimum of 60 miles round trip if you have to travel out of town. I was fortunate to get in my longest travels approved a few days before the rates were reduced. It was nice while it lasted.
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Nov 29, 2017 20:33
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FrozenVent posted:The admin leans into the office, asking if I have change. New Hire. Possibly homosexual. Must investigate further. *gets hit with discrimination suit*
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Nov 29, 2017 21:34
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