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Third World Reagan
May 19, 2008

Imagine four 'mechs waiting in a queue. Time works the same way.

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Schubalts
Nov 26, 2007

People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.
Is that Prince of Qin?

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009



Never forget.

Haquer
Nov 15, 2009

That windswept look...
reason #18571329847194817 to not play chinagame again:

12:14 AM - Cookie: "- increased range on taichi ultimate"
12:14 AM - Cookie: BECAUSE THAT WAS NEEDED SNAIL
12:14 AM - Cookie: lol
7:26 AM - Haquer™ :^]: what the gently caress
7:26 AM - Haquer™ :^]: literally why
7:26 AM - Haquer™ :^]: literlaly waht
7:26 AM - Haquer™ :^]: WHAT


loving literally why

ugh its Troika
May 2, 2009

by FactsAreUseless
Does anyone have a link to the post chronicling the time that we planted a shitload of wheat or corn or something across the road, then hid in the cornfield and murdered everyone who came by?

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

ugh its Troika posted:

Does anyone have a link to the post chronicling the time that we planted a shitload of wheat or corn or something across the road, then hid in the cornfield and murdered everyone who came by?

It was lemons.

Third World Reagan
May 19, 2008

Imagine four 'mechs waiting in a queue. Time works the same way.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y1LUIRRJocI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yhNPrk8auZU

Unhappy Meal
Jul 27, 2010

Some smiles show mirth
Others merely show teeth

I was so happy that my seed hoarding paid off for someone.

Rexxed
May 1, 2010

Dis is amazing!
I gotta try dis!

Whoopy posted it in the old griefing thread before it ate itself:
https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2886637&pagenumber=327&perpage=40#post415927299

Anal Papist posted:

Age of Wushu - Goon Tang Clan 1st Invitational Lemon Party

Skip to the videos below if you don't want/need an explanation.

Firstly some context. In age of wushu every week the top 10 crafters each get prize boxes, in these boxes are often special outfits. We discovered that the farmer profession got points for planting crops but didn't have to harvest the crops to get rank. Last week my character got in the top 10 and got a reward box containing an outfit.


Some people in the guild thought the outfit looked funny because it looks even more like peasant lowbie gear than the gear starting players get. We set out to plant but not harvest many, many crops. This started to cause lag in the surrounding area and even culling when too many crops get planted. Then the server crashed.

We had no clue if the crash was our fault, but we felt it was our duty to stress test the server by going to the busiest zone and growing the biggest sized crops we could. Normal planting looks like this:



This is a goon plantation:



Then we realised that unlike most crops that despawn in 5-10 minutes of not being harvested lemon trees last a good 45-60 min. We soon had the entire farmland of the zone covered in trees so no one could grow anything else. Then we noticed all the carts going past our plantation.

Wushu is a pvp focused game, one of the tasks available is protecting carts rear end they travel between two locations. Players not fr4om your guild may click on your cart to flag as a bandit and attack and destroy your cart stealing the reward you would have got from the task. Our makeshift lemon forest gave us the perfect cover to raid many carts



The entire area was a laggy mess full of culling due to so many extra entities. Players would approach the forest in confusion then real back as darts, claws, and angry goons flew out to destroy them.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yhNPrk8auZU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y1LUIRRJocI

Rexxed
May 1, 2010

Dis is amazing!
I gotta try dis!

Sniped again by Grithok
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dcTzpbUnx4E

Haquer
Nov 15, 2009

That windswept look...
Hello remember when this chinese mmo was goodahahahahhaa no

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

Goons made it good.

funakupo
May 9, 2006

the ultimate longterm partner
Oven Wrangler
My seed-hoarding skills apparently are my only legacy to pass to younger generations.

Third World Reagan
May 19, 2008

Imagine four 'mechs waiting in a queue. Time works the same way.

https://www.ashesofcreation.com/shop/

SweetBro
May 12, 2014

Did you read that sister?
Yes, truly a shitposter's post. I read it, Rem.
At first I thought that was fake, but had to double check because it's Ashes of Creation. I regret my decision.

angerbot
Mar 23, 2004

plob
Hello wushu goons

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

So what's everyone playing these days? Just finished trying out Star Wars: TOR, it's better than the average MMO, which isn't saying much. Probably going to get back into Final Fantasy 14 for the Christmas bear event; maybe float between it and D&D Online as my current MMO again like I did this year.

angerbeet posted:

Hello wushu goons

Hi angerbeet.

Third World Reagan
May 19, 2008

Imagine four 'mechs waiting in a queue. Time works the same way.
Bad steam games

also nothing

also just looking at steam porn games and wondering why

Cao Ni Ma
May 25, 2010




Of course

Pham Nuwen
Oct 30, 2010



So at this point is AoW 2 ever happening in the US or is the golden age of chinagame never to return?

Anal Papist
Jun 2, 2011

Third World Reggin posted:

Bad steam games

also nothing

also just looking at steam porn games and wondering why

Grithok you absolute pigfucker! I was hiding DEEP SPACE WAIFU: FLAT JUSTICE on my wishlist so I could give it to you during the christmas sale.


http://steamcommunity.com/app/639780/


I tried playing it. It couldn't properly detect my controller. I must have selected the chaste edition because all of my space waifu's clothes were immortal. Her face gradually changed to a bizarre swollen deep crimson. I assume my poor waifu suffers from Angiodema.



After a furious failed attempt to remove my obviously distressed waifu's top (so she could breathe easier and hopefully elevate the swelling), my beloved was forced to call the deep space constabulary. Unfortunately they mistook my avatar of a debauched teddy bear with visible erection riding a stolen motorcycle as some sort of ne'er-do-well. I was forced to fight off the police and for my heroic efforts I was rewarded a looping cutscene of my choosen waifu's bloated depressed face and impregnable clothing. Unfortunately the control issue from before resurfaced leaving my waifu stranded in time and space with myself unable to do anything but alt + f4. I tried to check the steam forums for help, but all I found were people begging for russian and chinese translations and a heated debated on whether there were too many robots and/or not enough traps in the game.

By gifting me this grithok you have forced me to step up my game, I must find an even worse present for you that surpassees that gay werewolf walking simulator I got you one year.


Edit: I was curious what the steam reviews were like seeing as the game felt barely playable, and was shocked that it has a 96% rating on 200 reviews with one of the few negative ones being this

quote:

빈유 개극혐

As of Dec 09 2017, 12:54 AM in PST +09:00, this review has been flagged by developers because my korean review was not related with topic.

What I wrote is I hate flat chest. And I haven't thought those "Flat Justice" in game title means flat boobies of girls in game.

It's my personal opinion how I can tell about boobies god drat it

Dec 15th, 02:28 AM in PST +09:00, I'm finally able to show this review. Shame on you dev teams, it's my freedom to talk about how I think about flat chest!

Anal Papist fucked around with this message at 00:54 on Dec 17, 2017

Third World Reagan
May 19, 2008

Imagine four 'mechs waiting in a queue. Time works the same way.

Pham Nuwen posted:

So at this point is AoW 2 ever happening in the US or is the golden age of chinagame never to return?

how to be a chinese developer

make something
steal poo poo from other people

promise western things for western people to show how western you are and there for are better than chinese people

never deliver

angerbot
Mar 23, 2004

plob
Please follow the lady to the guest room

Pham Nuwen
Oct 30, 2010



angerbeet posted:

Please follow the lady to the guest room

I'm not falling for that one again, I've only got the one kidney left!

Haroshia
Feb 27, 2011

You think this is a game?

super sweet best pal posted:

So what's everyone playing these days?

FFXIV, lovely mobile games (Dokkan and Fate Grand Order), random indie poo poo that looks interesting, jacking off to Monster Hunter World trailers/demos as well as pictures of Josh Sawyer.

Haquer
Nov 15, 2009

That windswept look...
Been dicking off on a new hellmoo shard after quitting FF14 again since it's gotten boring as gently caress yet again

[chatnet] Mara asks, "Why is the orphanage infected with MJ disease?"

..

[chatnet] Sotla says, "CLEAR THE ORPHANAGE I'M ABOUT TO CLUSTERNUKE IT"
[chatnet] Haqueer says, "oh poo poo"
[chatnet] Mara exclaims, "Wait!"

[chatnet] Sotla says, "LEAVE FREEDOM CITY IMMEDIATELY"

[chatnet] Haqueer says, "oh god"
[chatnet] Haqueer says, "running"
[chatnet] Sotla says, "COLOSSUS MISSILE IS HEADED FOR THE ORPHANAGE"
[chatnet] Mara says, "RIP Freedom City."
[chatnet] Haqueer screams.

* * *
[chatnet] Zinc cries.
[chatnet] [gamenet] Level 7 earthquake in cave complex!
[chatnet] [gamenet] Level 4 earthquake in casino!
[chatnet] [gamenet] Level 4 earthquake in shoreline!
[chatnet] [gamenet] Level 4 earthquake in sweaty palms!
[chatnet] [gamenet] Level 4 earthquake in giggling schoolgirl basement!
[chatnet] [gamenet] Level 4 earthquake in sewers!
[chatnet] Zinc says, "holy poo poo all the earthquakes"
[chatnet] Mara says, "Uhh."
[chatnet] Divaya says, "holy poo poo"
[chatnet] Zinc says, "sotla what the gently caress"
[chatnet] Haqueer says, "holy poo poo d ude"

angerbot
Mar 23, 2004

plob
The last time I played a MOO it was like 1997

Mr.Pibbleton
Feb 3, 2006

Aleuts rock, chummer.

Someone asked me if I played MMOs and I told them, "Not really, I've tried a few but the only one that really drew me in was a Chinese one I could pay for with subway gift cards."

dioxazine
Oct 14, 2004

Yeah, I haven't really played much since Wushu myself. Speaking of which, how's that Moonlight Blade Reggin was so excited about coming along?

Third World Reagan
May 19, 2008

Imagine four 'mechs waiting in a queue. Time works the same way.
It is china as gently caress and is never coming to the west

every time they talk about it, it is a major face gain for the company which means more chinese people respect them for talking about being western and respect them even more for not doing it

angerbot
Mar 23, 2004

plob
Sometimes I miss Chinagame, I just remembered the boss who put a debuff on you that looked exactly like every other goddamn buff and nothing ever indicated that you had to click something to get it off you, also you died instantly after 3 seconds.

Haquer
Nov 15, 2009

That windswept look...
I just quit ff14 again because it turns out raid progression is not fun at all (I enjoyed the bullshit in wushu but learning a script and repeating it ad nauseum until you win is retarded) and man do I miss how non traditional wushu was

Like I remember dealing with the dps check of the boss on top of the wall and him just cleaving the poo poo out of people in Longman's pass :allears:

Shalhavet
Dec 10, 2010

This post is terrible
Doctor Rope
Having a boss mechanicfeature where your support player blows themselves up to aggro a friendly npc so they don't die was novel, to say the least.

Mr.Pibbleton
Feb 3, 2006

Aleuts rock, chummer.

Those horse lances that only worked in one instance, but you could take them out of their and sell them. I actually made a few dings off of those.

Digital Decay
Dec 16, 2007
Reiteration #6,637,776,216
http://store.steampowered.com/app/295950

Anyone seen this? Looks pretty similar to Wushu.

edit: From reviews it doesn't seem to be a real MMO, just combat + flying skills

Digital Decay fucked around with this message at 10:42 on Jan 6, 2018

Kylra
Dec 1, 2006

Not a cute boy, just a boring girl.

Digital Decay posted:

http://store.steampowered.com/app/295950

Anyone seen this? Looks pretty similar to Wushu.

edit: From reviews it doesn't seem to be a real MMO, just combat + flying skills
The store page english description is semi-incomprehensible at least.

Third World Reagan
May 19, 2008

Imagine four 'mechs waiting in a queue. Time works the same way.
haven't tried it, haven't looked into it, but I will in a bit here

also for those of you who really hate your self

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2LPzUeMsPm8

Third World Reagan
May 19, 2008

Imagine four 'mechs waiting in a queue. Time works the same way.
those servers are only in china for 新流星搜劍錄 and no plans to bring it to the west or translate to english

Cao Ni Ma
May 25, 2010



Ran's awakening is like WV dual blades but 100% more anime from the looks of it

Always looking for that chinagame fix to take me back

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super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

I don't hate myself quite enough to spend money on Black Desert.

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