- christmas boots
- Oct 15, 2012
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To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out
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Biscuit Hider
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My [17F] family want to apologize to my sister-in-law [28F] for the death of her dog. I'm not responsible for the dog's death.
quote:
I'm not a fan of my sister in law Jenny. In the last three years that I've known her she's done everything she could to drive me crazy. She enjoys it. She's always unnecessarily mean, makes fun of me and my friends and always criticizes everything about me.
My other sister in law Marry [31F] and I are close though, she's great. I sometimes look after her dog for her.
Last week Jenny just assumed that I'm going to look after her dog for a few days without even asking. I've never done this for her. She came to drop it off and told me (she did not ask) to take care of the dog for a few days. I told her that I won't do that. She asked for an explanation and I said I don't owe her an explanation and I don't care about her stupid dog. She got angry, called me a B-word and left.
Apparently she left the dog with a friend and the dog had an accident while at that friend's place and eventually died. I don't know the details as I never asked.
Jenny now blames me for this. She says that if I had agreed to take care of the dog none of this would have happened. She posted that on social media along with some rants calling me names. She received backlash from some friends who thought she was unfairly attacking me. She deleted everything later.
Now my mom tells me that she's spoken with Jenny and Jenny would like an apology from me for the pain that I've caused her. My mom and dad told me that I should apologize for turning down Jenny's request of taking care of her dog (it wasn't a request, it was an order), about calling her dog stupid and for causing the chain of events that led to her dog's death.
I don't think I did anything wrong. She is very rude and mean to me, why would I do her a favor when she's not even asking nice?
I told my parents that once Jenny apologizes for calling me the B-word and for her general meanness and rudeness and for the things she called me on social media, I will tell her how sorry I am that her dog is dead. But I won't apologize for not agreeing to taking care of the dog and I won't accept any responsibility for what happened.
My parents say they're disappointed in me.
Am I doing anything wrong here? Are they all right and I'm wrong and at fault here? Should I apologize?
tl;dr: Sister in law who is always rude and mean to me assumed I will take care of her dog without asking. I declined and she had to make other arrangements, which eventually led to an accident that caused the dog's death. Now I'm under pressure to apologize to her for denying her request and causing her dog's death. Should I apologize?
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Dec 18, 2017 21:45
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 26, 2024 02:29
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- Barudak
- May 7, 2007
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You are a 17 year old woman, even if you are so lucky to have not heard one before directed to you, you can google search “non apology” like a big girl and go from there.
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Dec 18, 2017 21:47
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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You are a 17 year old woman, even if you are so lucky to have not heard one before directed to you, you can google search “non apology” like a big girl and go from there.
"I'm sorry I wasn't the one to kill your dog."
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Dec 18, 2017 21:51
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- Barudak
- May 7, 2007
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The loss of a loved one, especially something as close as a pet, can be devestating and you have my sincerest sympathies. I go one further, even, and say that not only are my thoughts and prayers with you in this trying time but that we will be vigilant that this will never happen again. I emplore all family members to, moving forward, vet thoroughly all those who will be entrusted with so critical a task so that there can never again be a tradgedy such as this one. It is only through vigilance that evil can be thwarted, and while it will require more work on the part of the pet owners, it is good work, noble work, honorable work that will spare ours and future generations the heart wrenchinf agony of losing a loved one.
My deepest condolences,
[Signature]
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Dec 18, 2017 21:54
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- blarzgh
- Apr 14, 2009
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SNITCHIN' RANDY
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Grimey Drawer
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How about,
"The death of a beloved pet and friend like Fido causes the utmost grief, and I understand your pain in this trying time; a pain that causes you to search for meaning and answers in this random plinko game we call 'life.' I understand your hurt, and your suffering, and I'm sorry its made you such a sour oval office."
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Dec 18, 2017 21:57
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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The Lord works in mysterious, dog-killing ways.
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Dec 18, 2017 21:59
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- blarzgh
- Apr 14, 2009
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SNITCHIN' RANDY
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Grimey Drawer
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"I'm sorry now that I did nothing to contribute to the death of your dog, because if I had known I'd take so much poo poo for it I deserve the luxury of offing that fucker myself."
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Dec 18, 2017 21:59
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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"If I were the one to kill your dog, you'd see the punch marks."
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Dec 18, 2017 22:00
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- Barudak
- May 7, 2007
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Dearest Sister In Law,
I am sorry that this malady which afflicts you that causes you to believe you owned a dog still plagues you. It is with deep regret that I can do no more but be steadfast in the truth. You must accept you have not ever owned a dog, and with it you can once again be the sister in law so dear to me that I miss so much.
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Dec 18, 2017 22:01
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- La Brea Carpet
- Nov 22, 2007
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I have no mouth and I must post
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My (24M) wife (24F) lived a double life and I am shocked
quote:
Hi reddit. I am using a throwaway because... well, you’ll see why.
I met my now wife three years ago when we both were 21. She told me she lived in Florida before with her family, graduated with an engineering degree and had a full-time job. Now that I look back, I could see a few red flags but nothing utterly suspicious.
First of all, I NEVER saw a piece of ID. Granted, I didn’t even ask or try to look for it. She was able to buy alcohol, lease a car, drive, have cards so I assumed she had the paperwork. We traveled extensively in and out of the country but why would I look into her passport? I didn’t.
Secondly, I haven’t met her family. Only her aunt and uncle who live near us. However, I spoke with her family on the phone and FaceTimed. All good. I never suspected anything because why would I?
However, three months before we decided to get married she wanted to come clean. She IS NOT American, she was born in Eastern Europe and lived there until age 18. She holds a government job, not the company I thought she worked for, has indeed an engineering degree but a different last name (her family name is not American). I have proof about all this so it is not bogus but I don’t want to go into detail about ber actual job. What baffles me the most is, it did not make me or anyone around us (she met my family, friends, etc) suspicious AT ALL. Like, she spoke PERFECT English, knew everything about US history, politics, traditions, etc. I am just shocked.
I do not feel betrayed or lied to because I do understand her reasons and it was beyond her. But how do I handle it? She is the same exact person, it does not affect our relationship in any way. What do you think about this?
TL;DR: my wife has a highly secretive job that required her lying about her true identity. How do I handle this?
Congrats on marrying Jane Bond. What do you think his Bond guy name is? Miles O'Dick?
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Dec 18, 2017 22:05
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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Just say that you just miscarried and you can't believe she is trying to equate her dog with your baby, which was the reason you couldn't look after her dog to begin with. You didn't tell her because you didn't want to burden her about your troubled pregnancy, but the stress of her accusations finally up and killed the thing. your baby. god. i hope you're proud of yourself sharon.
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Dec 18, 2017 22:06
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- christmas boots
- Oct 15, 2012
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To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out
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Biscuit Hider
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I weren’t the one what killed your dog, but I wish I had been I do.
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Dec 18, 2017 22:07
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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I wasn't able to save your dog because I was busy saving 5 other dogs who were stuck on a rail line
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Dec 18, 2017 22:09
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- Barudak
- May 7, 2007
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Youre right, i admit it. I did it because those meddling kids and your dog were always foiling my plans!
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Dec 18, 2017 22:12
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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"I'll get you a new dog, one that's way better than your old dog, by virtue of still being alive."
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Dec 18, 2017 22:18
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- blarzgh
- Apr 14, 2009
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SNITCHIN' RANDY
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Grimey Drawer
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I'm sorry about your dog. I have a terrible affliction where I sleepwalk to the door and answer it and tell people I won't do what they're rudely telling me to do, and then in the midst of fever dreams of light and blood I project my astral form to those people's friends' houses and cause elaborate, rube-goldberg-esque chains of events that kill dogs by knocking a bowl of chocolate on the floor for them to eat again I'm sorry.
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Dec 18, 2017 22:20
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- Barudak
- May 7, 2007
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Your dog and I had a frank discussion on end of life care and I did not feel comfortable assisting its suicide. I apologize for my stubborn morality but I remain convinced of my position.
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Dec 18, 2017 22:20
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- Barudak
- May 7, 2007
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Im sorry the person to whom you left your dog did not follow my recommended safe usage of the dog rollerskates I invented.
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Dec 18, 2017 22:21
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- christmas boots
- Oct 15, 2012
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To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out
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Biscuit Hider
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I don’t kill dogs. Only people who ask for things that aren’t mine to give.
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Dec 18, 2017 22:22
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- therobit
- Aug 19, 2008
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I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time
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I am sorry that your dog prefers heaven to the hell of living with you. Fortunately she is safe now from your repeated emotional abuse.
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Dec 18, 2017 22:24
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- blarzgh
- Apr 14, 2009
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SNITCHIN' RANDY
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Grimey Drawer
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The dog was awoken by the feeling of me being on top of it. He opened his eyes and it was me. The room was dark but he could see me thanks to the moonlight. He was VERY sleepy and confused and asked me what I was doing. I was staring at him and looked very sad and teary eyed. I looked so sad that he thought someone had died and it freaked him out. I started touching his face and then put my hands on his throat. At this point he tried to get me off him but he couldn’t. I lightly slapped his face to make him stop and then I started choking him slightly. It wasn’t a strong choke but definitely enough for him to feel some pressure. After a few seconds my grip tightened and I leaned over like I was about to kiss him(??). I didn’t though and instead looked at him with a sad expression for an uncomfortably long time. The dog literally told me, “get the f*ck off me or I’m gonna scream”. I sighed and got off him.
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Dec 18, 2017 22:24
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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Chiron, bite back your spleen, for this has been willed where what is willed must be and is not ours to question.
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Dec 18, 2017 22:25
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- blarzgh
- Apr 14, 2009
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SNITCHIN' RANDY
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Grimey Drawer
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That got really fuckin dark halfway through editing it but I was committed so I couldn't stop
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Dec 18, 2017 22:25
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- Barudak
- May 7, 2007
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Your Dog has a different last name and faked its death so it could move back in with its real family. If you ever see it in a restaurant it will deny all knowledge of you.
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Dec 18, 2017 22:26
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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That dog was already sick. But it loved you so much, it couldn't bear to tell you, or bear to let you see it die. I know that's the plot of Moulin Rouge but it's true.
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Dec 18, 2017 22:28
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- Barudak
- May 7, 2007
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Im sorry your dog cannot hold their alcohol at the company office party.
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Dec 18, 2017 22:28
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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how was i supposed to know your friend would vaccinate your dog, causing it to die of autism
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Dec 18, 2017 22:30
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- blarzgh
- Apr 14, 2009
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SNITCHIN' RANDY
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Grimey Drawer
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someone with more time on their hands cross Pete and Deaddog
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Dec 18, 2017 22:31
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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someone with more time on their hands cross Pete and Deaddog
sounds like the dog already crossed someone
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Dec 18, 2017 22:31
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- La Brea Carpet
- Nov 22, 2007
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I have no mouth and I must post
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The cycle of nature and your stupid plan don't mean a thing! Your dog is gone. Your dog will no longer talk, no longer laugh, cry or get angry!
—Cloud Strife to Sephiroth
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Dec 18, 2017 22:31
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- Mezzanon
- Sep 16, 2003
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Pillbug
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I'm sorry you're going through such a ruff time.
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Dec 18, 2017 22:31
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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hahah man I'm just imagining how loving pissed I'd be if someone's apology to me referenced moulin rouge
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Dec 18, 2017 22:32
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 26, 2024 02:29
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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quote:My (24M) husband (27M) is a hypochondriac and a compulsive liarRelationships
64 points 28 comments submitted 1 year ago by marriedandliedto to r/relationships
This is a weird story from beginning to end so bear with me lol. I'm really bad at narrating these things so if it's okay, I'll write about it in increments.
[4 years ago]
My now-husband "Brad" and I met through a mutual friend. This was before I came out as trans (FtM) and I was pretty confused/terrified about my identity. We started talking often even though Brad and I had nothing in common; he was incredibly charming and charismatic. A few days into talking almost all day on-and-off, Brad admitted that he was battling a form of cancer. He claimed that he had caught on to it very early and there was a good chance of recovering, but sounded understandably scared. I had lost someone very close to me to the same illness, so I felt overwhelmingly sympathetic and told him I'd be there for him through it.
For the next few months we texted a lot although we didn't meet up much. Brad would text me when he was going for treatment, and his descriptions of the stuff he was going through checked out with what I've seen when my friend was suffering from it. There were a lot of ups and downs in his illness and a lot of nights I would sit sleepless and worried sick, but after a big surgery about a year into us talking, his cancer finally went into remission.
I'm not sure if this was some kind of Florence Nightingale thing, but at this point I was madly in love with him. Looking back this was weird because Brad and I literally had NOTHING in common, but he was a smooth talker and I was too smitten to think properly. Some time later Brad asked me out, and we started dating.
[3 years ago]
I cautiously came out as male-identifying. This was met with a lot of push-back from my friends, family, and also Brad. Eventually my family disowned me (haven't talked to them since), but Brad stayed. He wasn't too happy about it, but the fact that I wasn't willing to undergo any serious transitioning seemed to lighten the blow for him. I was grateful that he had stayed and tried to understand where I was coming from, and our relationship grew deeper. By this time I had told Brad that I had been physically abused by my father in my teenage years, and Brad replied by saying he understood me completely, as he too had been severely abused by his parents.
Over time, as we shared more about each other, I realized that a lot of our past experiences were uncannily similar, especially the negative ones. At some point I questioned myself if Brad was trying to "one-up" me by mirroring every single one of my past issues with a slightly worse one, but I immediately felt horrible thinking it-- I didn't want to make light of his problems. And I was still grateful that he hadn't left me when I came out.
[2 years ago]
Brad and I had moved in by this time, and things were not going too well. We went through periods of complete bliss, then arguing like crazy. Brad claimed that this was normal in long-term relationships (I haven't had any before Brad) and I believed him. I started feeling that the relationship was a little, well, unfair. Whenever Brad got upset or cranky, I had to almost instantly forgive him and "understand where he was coming from" because of his tragic past and recent illness. But when I was upset, I was told to "suck it up and stop being a victim." At the time I didn't question it, but I did start going to therapy for my childhood trauma and depression. In the meanwhile I started drinking to cope with the "unfairness" and all the frustration it brought-- this only seemed to give Brad yet another excuse to be upset.
[1 year ago]
Going to therapy had increased my self-esteem and independence. However it also prompted me to question Brad's behavior, especially how he could become emotionally abusive at times. We started going to couple's therapy, which didn't really help because Brad would sit there and lie his rear end off to the therapist. We argued a ton over this, and I started questioning everything he said-- this was the first time I started considering the possibility that he had a compulsive lying problem.
Some time later Brad left town for a "business thing." At this point I didn't even question what he did at his job (his field of work is completely different from mine and very specialized), and considered this a rare opportunity to not constantly argue with him over every single lie he may or may not have told. A few weeks later I got a phone call from Brad saying he was in the hospital after contracting lyme disease. I was shocked, and demanded I go see him, but whenever I asked where he was and which hospital he was staying in, he would "conveniently" become too weak to talk. Over the course of a couple of weeks he claimed to have developed hydrocephalus, gotten treatment, had been diagnosed with hepatitis C, was misdiagnosed, was diagnosed again with AIDS, was misdiagnosed again, and then was finally diagnosed with a mild autoimmune disorder and hypothyroidism. I should have been skeptical about this, but I was too panicked to think straight, and when he finally came home with his medication I was simply glad to see him again alive.
He was on bed rest for the next few days, but one day he called me over and very casually asked if I would marry him. Initially I balked, but somehow Brad managed to talk me into it-- at some times he would even shame me for "getting cold feet"-- and we had a court wedding with one witness. Life continued like nothing had happened.
[a few months ago]
Brad and I recently visited his parents to sort out a family matter. Initially I wasn't too comfortable, considering Brad's claims that they were incredibly racist, sexist, and abusive, but after the initial shock (Brad had not told them about the marriage, nor my gender) they turned out to be pretty cool. His mom especially took a liking to me, and for the next few days we were visiting I took a lot of walks with her just talking.
It turned out that Brad had also lied a lot to her, claiming his ex-girlfriend from high school had died (she's alive and fine), saying my gender identity was an "inside joke" (she was actually pretty cool about it even after I clarified), and a bunch of tiny lies that baffled us both as to why he would even bother with them (things like saying he had taquitos for lunch when he actually had a burger, etc).
I suggested that maybe Brad was just having a sort of existential crisis after his illness, to which his mom freaked out and asked "what illness?" I told her about the cancer, and she started flat out laughing, saying he had never had cancer-- just mild tuberculosis as a baby. I then told her about the whole lyme disease-AIDS-hepatitis fiasco during his business trip-- it turns out there was no business trip, he was just visiting his family, and there was no illness. The "medication" he brought back were just vitamins his mom had packed him that he put in a pill bottle and peeled off the label.
She must have noticed that I was visibly upset, because she tried to comfort me by saying he must have just said all that to get my attention, which was wrong of course but still showed how much he cared about me, or something like that. She admitted that she wasn't there for most of his childhood, and so he had grown up watching a lot of movies/TV shows instead of social interaction. She seemed to be aware of his tendency to lie/overreact, and blamed this on melodramatic movies. So basically I'm married to the Cable Guy.
After we went back home, I asked Brad what the hell this was all about. He denied everything at first, saying his parents had lied to me, became defensive and angry, then finally admitted that all his illnesses/personal tragedies had been lies. He tried to play it off as a joke, saying "hey at least my cancer thing won you over," and walked away, and I was too stunned to really say anything.
It's been a month and I still lose sleep over it. I feel like the man I married just isn't the same man I fell for. I almost feel cheated and I have no idea how to move on from this.
tl;dr: Husband lied about nonexistent illness/trauma, what do I do?
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Dec 18, 2017 22:33
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Dec 18, 2017 21:45
