- christmas boots
- Oct 15, 2012
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To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out
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Biscuit Hider
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Agreed, the 12 year old daughter deserves to be wiped off the earth for the crime of getting molested
Takes two to tango. Albeit unwillingly.
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Dec 21, 2017 19:11
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Jun 3, 2024 00:46
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- maskenfreiheit
- Dec 30, 2004
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It's not rape culture because the overarching culture in which we live would not find it at all acceptable on a general level
yeah that's why his wife is going to therapy so she can eventually re-unite with him
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Dec 21, 2017 19:13
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- navier-stoked
- Aug 30, 2004
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It's not rape culture because the overarching culture in which we live would not find it at all acceptable on a general level, where the whole point of rape culture is that the nature of our society makes rape tacitly acceptable and puts onus on the victim
The man is garbage and should be killed, but most normal people would think and say that
what if things could take place on a continuum of gradients with the culture of today bearing the marks of the cultures of the past. no, unless people are raping each other in the streets, to the gleeful cries of onlookers, rape culture does not exist.
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Dec 21, 2017 19:16
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- Meme Emulator
- Oct 4, 2000
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His wife is individually a retard and most people would advise her to leave and/or kill him
Not really, especially if the husband is wealthy or influential and divorcing him would completely ruin her way of life. People can rationalize just about anything
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Dec 21, 2017 19:17
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- christmas boots
- Oct 15, 2012
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To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out
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Biscuit Hider
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Which is why such phrases as “if she’s old enough to pee she’s old enough for me” and “if there’s grass on the field play ball” don’t exist.
Also while I would agree that we would largely say that a daddy diddling a daughter is definitely a “don’t do it”, I’m sure someone has stats that I don’t want to see about how often that happens
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Dec 21, 2017 19:19
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- christmas boots
- Oct 15, 2012
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To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out
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Biscuit Hider
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what if things could take place on a continuum of gradients with the culture of today bearing the marks of the cultures of the past. no, unless people are raping each other in the streets, to the gleeful cries of onlookers, rape culture does not exist.
That too. This may be on the extreme end of things, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t feed off of stuff maybe a few degrees closer to what society will tolerate.
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Dec 21, 2017 19:20
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- maskenfreiheit
- Dec 30, 2004
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His wife is individually a retard and most people would advise her to leave and/or kill him
don't use that word as an insult, it's ableist.
the guy who bags my groceries is a nice guy who would call the cops if he saw a rape
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Dec 21, 2017 19:21
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- Meme Emulator
- Oct 4, 2000
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Which is why such phrases as “if she’s old enough to pee she’s old enough for me” and “if there’s grass on the field play ball” don’t exist.
Also while I would agree that we would largely say that a daddy diddling a daughter is definitely a “don’t do it”, I’m sure someone has stats that I don’t want to see about how often that happens
It happens all the time. Its a big reason why the internet predator scare bugs me so much, statistically internet predators are barely a blip on the radar when it comes to sexual crimes against children. Nobody wants to look at their husbands, brothers and uncles as possible culprits though, even though most abuses are within the family.
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Dec 21, 2017 19:21
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- Anne Whateley
- Feb 11, 2007
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 i like nice words
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A society that looks the other way a whole lot is rape culture. A society where people are like "well maybe the wannabe rapist was sleepwalking, sleepwalking can be really weird, and why wasn't her bedroom door locked" is rape culture. A society where people would be like "he only touched her and only over the clothes, and if you're divorcing him, it sounds like the problem is solved" is rape culture. A society where cops blow off this poo poo, people find excuses, rape kits don't get tested, we elect someone who publicly brags about assaulting women, and known, violent rapists flourish for decades is rape culture.
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Dec 21, 2017 19:26
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- Cough Drop The Beat
- Jan 22, 2012
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by Lowtax
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SO (33M) thinks im overreacting (33F) to him molesting our daughter (12F) throwaway crosspost (self.rape)
Pretty sure this poor woman is very justified in stabbing her husband to death.
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Dec 21, 2017 19:31
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- ArbitraryC
- Jan 28, 2009
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Pick a number, any number
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Pillbug
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I'm kind of surprised the cps can get involved with a case of p clearcut sexual abuse of a 12 year old and not call the cops themselves. Is that just something they don't do or what?
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Dec 21, 2017 19:32
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- La Brea Carpet
- Nov 22, 2007
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I have no mouth and I must post
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To lighten things up a bit:
I[26M] am concerned about my fiancée's [24F] behavior.
quote:
We've been together 7 years. High school sweethearts.
I've been wanting to spend time with her but since the holidays are coming up it's hard because we both work and have family dinners to attend. I finally got to talk to her on the phone last night and she seemed off, distracted by something. I was able to talk to her for a little before she had to go to the store with her mom.
Now that it hits me she won't let me see the bank transactions either. We have a joint account and I wanted to check it to see if I had enough to get her gift. I know that she also locked her phone.
She didn't do this until after her birthday at the beginning of the month. I want to know what's going on?
Is she doing something wrong that I should be worried about?
TLDR: My fiancée is being sneaky and I'm worried that she's doing something bad.
Alright Junior Crimefighters, can you solve this case??
EDIT: She saw this post and rolled her eyes before calling me a silly idiot. She said she had a Christmas gift for me and didn't want me to see it. I am so dumb.
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Dec 21, 2017 19:34
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- girl pants
- Sep 21, 2006
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I feel a great disturbance in my pants
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Agreed, the 12 year old daughter deserves to be wiped off the earth for the crime of getting molested
That's not what I meant and you know it.
I [27 F] am increasingly frustrated by my GF's [28 F] of 2 years different standards of cleanliness/weird rules about food
quote:
u/notcleanenough
We've been together 2 years and moved in together 4 months ago. I'm growing more and more frustrated by her bizarre definitions of what is "clean" vs "dirty" and am not sure how to deal. Do I just suck it up and acquiesce to her demands (some of which I think are unreasonable), do we try to compromise (a difficult task, she is VERY stubborn as am I), or hit the lawyer/gym up/etc (not really an option).
Some examples of what I find befuddling:
1) I bought some eggs from my co-worker, who has a backyard henhouse. She said that because the eggs were pasteurized and sterilized by industrial-scale agricultural equipment (co-worker said he doesn't even wash them, just eats them straight out of the henhouse every morning) that we ABSOLUTELY CANNOT eat them because we might get sick. If I cook them on one of the pans in the kitchen, then that pan will be "dirty" and I will have to throw it away and buy a new one. The eggs aren't fresh anymore (it's been 2 weeks) and I'm disappointed that I didn't get to eat the eggs. GF was enthusiastic about farm fresh eggs until she found out that my friend doesn't sanitize them at home (why would he own that equipment?!)
2) Any food item that touches the counter/stovetop MUST be thrown out. For example, I made pasta for dinner this week. A couple of pieces of penne fell onto the counter as I was pouring the dry pasta into the pot of boiling water. I grabbed them and chucked them back in. She FREAKED OUT and started CRYING that now the pasta was "dirty" and "disgusting" and she couldn't eat it. For the record, this isn't some horrible grease-spattered stovetop. It's a glass flat-top range that I had literally JUST CLEANED before starting to cook. Also, anything that could possibly contaminate the food would be killed by boiling water. But fine, whatever. I threw out the "dirty" food and started over.
3) We got some carrots in the CSA box this week. She wouldn't let me cook with them because there was dirt on most of the carrots when they arrived. Rinsing off the dirt in water wasn't enough, they were still "dirty". I ate all the carrots myself because I thought they were fine (and they were). I mean it's a drat carrot, it grows in the dirt. For the record, grocery store carrots that are all identical size/color and pre-washed are OK.
4) I was chopping squash. She came into the kitchen and started inspecting EACH AND EVERY 1cm2 cube of squash I'd chopped and scrutinizing it. Apparently blistered skin is "dirty" and warrants throwing the squash away, even if the blistered spot is cut out. She also insisted that there were "tiny spots" between the skin & flesh of the vegetable that were "dirty". I could see some circular shapes if I looked really hard, but I'm pretty sure that's just where the skin connects to the squash flesh. She refused to eat any of the squash.
5) One of the onions in the pantry got squishy and grew green stalks (which was odd, it was only 2 weeks old, but sometimes that happens with grocery store produce). She made me throw out EVERYTHING that was in the pantry because it was "dirty". That was the last straw that sent me here. I think this is unreasonable and expensive. We're broke and can't afford to replace $500 worth of food because she's afraid of onion stalks. Her answer is to just not replace things until we can afford to.
6) Despite all this OCD about food safety, she didn't clean the entire house while I was travelling for work last month (I was gone 3 weeks). The toilets were both really nasty when I came back, there were a ball of her hair about 6 cm wide in the shower, there were dirty clothes & used tissues littering the house, and the kitchen was a mess - every flat surface was covered in food-crusted dishes, cups, pots, and pans. This is strangely incongruous with her obsession with food safety.
As you can see, her food rules lead to arbitrarily throwing away a LOT of food. She even insisted, before we moved in together, that cooking was more expensive than going to restaurants because "you have to throw away so much bad food". No, just because a veggie is blistered or the chicken has a vein in it doesn't mean you throw it away. It's not "bad", you just cut off the unsightly part (if you're really picky) or just eat the drat thing. I didn't think anything of the comment at the time, assuming that she was just buying lovely or out-of-season produce with a short shelf life.
She doesn't have any immune system disorders that would necessitate being fastidious about food safety. She was treated for OCD as a kid and "made a full recovery". I think these strange food rules are absolutely obsessive, but when I gently suggest that she discuss some of our food-related arguments with her therapist, she starts crying and refuses to talk to me until I apologize and say that her rules are perfectly reasonable.
I don't know what to do. I'm tired of throwing away food because she doesn't like how it looks. I tried banning her from the kitchen while I cook all our meals, but she cried and said I was being mean. I'm just tired of her monitoring. I offered to let her cook, but it took her an hour to peel and chop a single potato. Ain't nobody got time for that! Restaurants for every meal aren't an option (for me), either.
I'm at my wit's end. I tried to just follow all her rules, but it seems like she invents new ones every day. Also, it's really bad for our finances (not to mention wasteful) to just throw away half of the food we buy. I feel like I'm going loving crazy! Do I just tell her to feed her drat self? I don't think that's a great idea. How do you even compromise on a thing like this? She wants me to follow ALL the rules ALL the time, and I really don't want to follow all, or some, or ANY of them! In my ideal world, she would get over it and eat squash with blistered skin.
tl;dr: GF has obsessively specific rules about food/kitchen. I think they are pointless and stupid and don't want to follow them. Not sure how to resolve this conflict.
 picky eaters who refuse to get therapy
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Dec 21, 2017 19:40
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- girl pants
- Sep 21, 2006
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I feel a great disturbance in my pants
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To lighten things up a bit:
I[26M] am concerned about my fiancée's [24F] behavior.
Alright Junior Crimefighters, can you solve this case??
EDIT: She saw this post and rolled her eyes before calling me a silly idiot. She said she had a Christmas gift for me and didn't want me to see it. I am so dumb.
I was hoping she was saving up for a really baller engagement chastity cage.
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Dec 21, 2017 19:42
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- CharlestheHammer
- Jun 26, 2011
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YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!
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It happens all the time. Its a big reason why the internet predator scare bugs me so much, statistically internet predators are barely a blip on the radar when it comes to sexual crimes against children. Nobody wants to look at their husbands, brothers and uncles as possible culprits though, even though most abuses are within the family.
Yeah we as people who aren't personally involved can condemn him but when friends and family are involved that poo poo warps and suddenly he is the victim.
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Dec 21, 2017 19:45
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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That's not what I meant and you know it.
I [27 F] am increasingly frustrated by my GF's [28 F] of 2 years different standards of cleanliness/weird rules about food
picky eaters who refuse to get therapy
Holy poo poo it would be hard not to push her off a cliff into the sea
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Dec 21, 2017 19:47
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- ArbitraryC
- Jan 28, 2009
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Pick a number, any number
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Pillbug
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That's not what I meant and you know it.
I [27 F] am increasingly frustrated by my GF's [28 F] of 2 years different standards of cleanliness/weird rules about food
picky eaters who refuse to get therapy
setting everything else aside how can anyone put up with a relationship where the other person literally cries anytime they're challenged about anything. That's just unfair, "you should talk to your therapist about this" *bawls like a baby until you say sorry*.
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Dec 21, 2017 19:54
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- girl pants
- Sep 21, 2006
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I feel a great disturbance in my pants
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The fact that picky eater GF also refuses to clean the house makes me think that she *might* be three toddlers operating a grown woman suit.
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Dec 21, 2017 19:55
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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It is pretty sad and demented that almost every relationship we see is one person who has been conditioned to be a nurturing person, and one person who is emotionally four years old
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Dec 21, 2017 19:56
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- girl pants
- Sep 21, 2006
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I feel a great disturbance in my pants
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- refuses vegetables
- cries when doctors are mentioned
- terrible hygiene
I'm just saying, I'm pretty sure the girlfriend is a toddler.
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Dec 21, 2017 20:00
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- ArbitraryC
- Jan 28, 2009
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Pick a number, any number
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Pillbug
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It's also kind of funny she's a-okay with restuarant food and bagged precut/prewashed stuff cause that's where all the produce that isn't picture perfect enough to be sold at a grocery store ends up. She'd prolly vom if she saw those kitchens/processing plants.
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Dec 21, 2017 20:03
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- Meme Emulator
- Oct 4, 2000
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It is pretty sad and demented that almost every relationship we see is one person who has been conditioned to be a nurturing person, and one person who is emotionally four years old
People are only going to be posting on r/relationships if they have a problem
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Dec 21, 2017 20:04
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- Meme Emulator
- Oct 4, 2000
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Your sample is biased towards bad relationships
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Dec 21, 2017 20:04
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- christmas boots
- Oct 15, 2012
-
To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out
-
Biscuit Hider
|
My (36M) dad (62M) sent me an audio file labeled “in case something happens to me.” Should I be worried?
quote:
TLDR; my dad sent me an audio file labeled “in case something happens to me”. It’s about 12 minutes of his new wife yelling at him and muttering under her breath that he’s a “son of a bitch” or “you ruined me, you know that!?”
My dad got divorced from my mom about 3 years ago and got remarried a year ago. The woman he is married to now I don’t really get along with. She seems nice on the surface, but whenever I visit there’s stuff I see out of the corner of my eye and things I hear that make me not want to be around her. She is very critical of my dad when he’s doing small tasks like taking food from the kitchen to the dinning room. My dad seems like he’s on eggshells around her trying to figure out what she wants.
My dad’s wife also had a series of strokes over the summer, like 3 in the same week. She’s recovered pretty well considering. She occasionally can’t think of a word she wants to use, but other than that you’d hardly even tell. She had a bit of a speech impediment before the strokes, so she seems pretty similar to me. But she seems to be frustrated easier now. And I guess angrier. Where as before she tended to be extremely emotional all the time, prone to crying at random times during family gatherings, and sending emotional text messages to us after seeing her about some perceived slight.
All this has made me want to spend a lot less time with my dad. We were never extremely close and the divorce from my mom was rough. I found out my dad had 3 affairs over the course of their marriage. Oddly he was the one who left. But I could probably get past all that, but his new wife just is incredibly uncomfortable for me to be around.
Also since I’m not around, I don’t know how much of this is warranted on her side. My dad was not the best husband to my mom, obviously there was the cheating, but my dad would also have random bouts of rage where he just needed to scream at people. Another reason I’m not that close with him now. But a lot of his anger was associated with work. He’s retired now and seems incredibly relaxed compared to his old self when I see him alone. He’s very tense when around his new wife, but it seems to me like he’s more on the defensive than the offensive.
No one in the family likes his new wife, he’s pretty much alienated my uncle, aunt, and grandmother over her. The new wife constantly thinks my dad’s family is out to get her, or determined to hate her. This doesn’t particularly help their relationships. My uncle thinks she is a gold digger, we know she’s had money problems before she met my dad, possibly even declared bankruptcy at one point. My aunt just doesn’t want to deal with either of them at this point.
So now my dad has bought a house in Florida and they’re moving there. They will be far away from any of my dad’s family. It’s likely that we will only see them once a year from now on, depending on how often they come back.
Overall, I don’t know if there’s anything I can do, or even should do. I’m very confused by it all.
The audio file he sent me is about 12 minutes of what seems to be just his phone in his pocket. There’s static, but his wife can clearly be heard yelling at him and muttering about how much she hates him. She calls him a “son of a bitch” several times, and also says “he ruined her life”.
I asked my dad if he feels like he’s in danger and he says no. But then why send the file? Also I know that she has tried to get him to write me out of his will. He’s told me this at least. And the reason they got married so fast is because she was concerned that if my dad died, and they weren’t married, I would put her out on the street and not give her the condo because only my dad is on the deed. So I find that insulting.
So anyone have any thoughts? It’s a lot and I have no idea.
My Dad literally sent me a dead man’s switch. Should I be concerned?
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Dec 21, 2017 20:06
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- Meme Emulator
- Oct 4, 2000
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My (36M) dad (62M) sent me an audio file labeled “in case something happens to me.” Should I be worried?
My Dad literally sent me a dead man’s switch. Should I be concerned?
My dad sends me an updated copy of his will every time he gets on an airplane
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Dec 21, 2017 20:09
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- Meme Emulator
- Oct 4, 2000
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Anyway that dad is married to one of the black widows that poison thier husbands that you see on Investigation Discovery all the time
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Dec 21, 2017 20:10
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- La Brea Carpet
- Nov 22, 2007
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I have no mouth and I must post
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UPDATE:My (22F) sister’s (27F) husband (28M) came into my bedroom last night and something strange happened
quote:
Original post: https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/7km91t/my_22f_sisters_27f_husband_28m_came_into_my/
http://archive.is/BuPSg
First of all, I'm really grateful for all the advice I got on my original post! I know I may have seemed a bit too calm but that's because it took me a while to process everything. Fortunatley I'm safe now though.
So, like I mentioned in the original post, I already planned on going back home after that incident and packed my stuff. I was at a local cafe when my sis called me and asked me where I was. We spoke for a bit and she came to me after a short while. When she arrived I started off by asking her if her husband used to sleepwalk when he was younger (I didn't want to jump into the topic straightaway). She said that he used to do it but it doesn't happen that often anymore- he only sleepwalked once since they've been together. I started explaining to her what happened and she was absolutley furious. She asked me why I didn't wake her up and that it was very dangerous.
She went back to her house and insisted that I go with her, to confront her husband. The whole time she was going absolutley crazy, yelling/cursing around the place and frantically going through drawers. When he came later that evening she verbally attacked him and he swore that he doesn't remember anything at all because he was drunk. She asked him if he took any substances lately and he started beating around the bush. She threw a bunch of prescription drugs on the table and asked him to explain. He said that he only uses them when stressed and she got mad and asked him why he's suddenly stressed when I visit them. They started yelling at each other and she said that she thought they were over this, she thought she could finally trust him etc. He confessed that he took some drugs (I can't remember the names) and that he doesn't remember coming into my bedroom or doing anything to me. He insisted that he would never ever hurt me and has no reason to lie about something as serious as this.
I said that when I told him to get off me, he responded so that would mean he was awake and conscious. After hesitating he admitted that he dreamt that he was choking me and I started crying so he stopped. In real life I wasn't crying though, I was just trying to get him off me and kicked him. He stated that he didn't hear me speak at all. He asked my sister if he wasn't being truthful, why would he tell her that he had a dream about me and admit something of that nature since that would surely add fuel to the fire
They were arguing and my sister suddenly mentioned that she heard someone going to the bathroom at night and asked who it was. I said it wasn't me but I heard him go after he left my bedroom. According to her he was gone for an unusually long time and he said that he doesn't even remember that. He brought up the fact that he used to do that when sleepwalking as a kid and didn't know he still does it. He turned to me and apologized for what he did and said that he had no clue he was capable of doing that.
My sister was very upset about the situation and started screaming at him. She said that he was a disgusting and obsessed pervert and still hadn't changed after all these years. That she tried everything to make it work and became the perfect wife to keep him happy. She said a lot of stuff that was extremely awkward for me personally and completley changed my view on him. I've never seen her so furious and distraught. I know none of this is my fauly but I feel like I hosed everything up. It just sucks being in this position. Long story short....they're separating now. She packed her stuff as well and told him that she would be staying at our parent's place for a while. She's not really speaking to me as well so that's that.
This whole situation sucks and it feels like everything came crashing down so rapidly. There was no way I would ever foresee this. Either way I feel safer now and again thanks for all the helpful comments.
TL;DR He still claims that he doesn't remember anything about that night. He was drunk and my sister found some drugs he was hiding somewhere. They argued viciously and she was extremely upset. They're separating now and she's going to stay at my parent's place for a while.
It wasn't me it was the sleepwalking alcohol Ambien walrus.
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Dec 21, 2017 20:32
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- Bored
- Jul 26, 2007
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Dude, ix-nay on the oice-vay.
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I just think it's kind of ironic it's a post from a women's perspective about a dude being insecure about his penis size when she's (unintentionally or not) exaggerating her ex's dick size. The complex doesn't just come from nowhere, basically every lady has slept with an 8+ dude even though that's basically statistically impossible.
Here's a li'l secret. We don't actually care that much about dick size. If a dude tells us that it is 8 inches, we will believe them because we don't know any better.
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Dec 21, 2017 21:18
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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Ambien: not even however many times it was
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Dec 21, 2017 21:35
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- girl pants
- Sep 21, 2006
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I feel a great disturbance in my pants
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I have never cared about how big somebody's penis is. Nobody cares about your dick as much as you.
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Dec 21, 2017 21:36
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- Pick
- Jul 19, 2009
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Nap Ghost
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That is accurate.
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Dec 21, 2017 21:37
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Jun 3, 2024 00:46
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- 30 Goddamned Dicks
- Sep 8, 2010
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I will leave you to flounder in your cesspool of primeval soup, you sad, lonely, little cowards.
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Fun Shoe
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Here's a li'l secret. We don't actually care that much about dick size. If a dude tells us that it is 8 inches, we will believe them because we don't know any better.
Pretty much. It’s not like I have a ruler in my back pocket and whip it out before coitus to double check.
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Dec 21, 2017 21:38
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Dec 21, 2017 19:11
