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Would you like to join me for an unforgettable luncheon?
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Feb 4, 2018 00:40
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Cat Army 
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*after they finish having sex* "Le upthumb XD"
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Feb 4, 2018 00:41
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Al Borland Corp. posted:I've had a father in law go aggro on me while I was holding my infant before. Luckily it just went as far as him telling me to step outside and me saying "No thanks", and I was across the room and we were in the drat hospital so he did not aggressively pursue this. Last time I saw my in-laws was when my daughter was born. Specifically, it was the last time I saw the back of their heads because security was escorting them out of the hospital. I will never again achieve that level of satisfaction.
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Feb 4, 2018 01:13
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Palpek posted:It's 2018 everybody: this reminds me of the girl who was busting out dodge means in bed.
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Feb 4, 2018 01:13
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ArbitraryC posted:this reminds me of the girl who was busting out dodge means in bed. 
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Feb 4, 2018 01:15
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sorry autocorrect "doge memes" like literally saying "such sex"
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Feb 4, 2018 01:18
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Palpek posted:It's 2018 everybody: Please don't date Goons, tia.
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Feb 4, 2018 01:19
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Admiral Ray posted:Please don't date Goons, tia. No, please somebody date me, I don't want to die alone. 
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Feb 4, 2018 01:22
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Absurd Alhazred posted:No, please somebody date me, I don't want to die alone. Everybody dies alone, pal. e: especially you
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Feb 4, 2018 01:26
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Jeza posted:Everybody dies alone, pal. 
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Feb 4, 2018 01:27
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ArbitraryC posted:sorry autocorrect "doge memes"
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Feb 4, 2018 01:30
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Such sex wow
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Feb 4, 2018 01:31
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here: My [23M] Girlfriend's [21F] Inappropriate Behavior, year long relationship, she has an obsession with an internet fad quote:Hi, been a lurker on this subreddit and didn't really have the courage to post, but I'm at my wits end with my girlfriend (let's call her Chris) and her immature behavior.
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Feb 4, 2018 01:32
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My [22/M] girlfriend [22/F] accidentally damaged my friend's [21/M] laptop, and he wants me to break up with her because of it, or else he's ending our friendship. I AM NOT BREAKING UP WITH MY GIRLFRIEND OVER THIS. I WANT TO MAKE THAT CLEAR. THANK YOU. I've known my buddy [21/M] since I started going to university 4 years ago. My girlfriend [22/F] is my best friend of 16 years and we've been dating for two months. She asked to borrow his laptop to work on an assignment when the three of us were hanging out at his home. While carrying it she slipped on a water spill, she didn't get hurt, but the laptop was damaged pretty badly, albeit still repairable. He started losing his poo poo at my girlfriend, even though she apologized and offered to pay for the cost of the repair. I pulled him aside and asked why the hell he was freaking out. He said I needed to break up with my girlfriend because of how careless she was, or else we couldn't be friends anymore. Then he went on a weird rant about how I shouldn't have dated her in the first place because I deserve better, but I think he was projecting hard about something. It boggles my mind that he wants me to break up with her because she accidentally damaged his laptop, over his negligence in not cleaning up the spilled water. I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend, so I assume my friendship with him is over. The thing is, he's a member of our team (5 people including myself) for the video game - League of Legends, we play, and he's irreplaceable. There's no one that we know of who is equal in skill level to him, that also plays his role. We take the game very seriously by meeting up and practicing every weekend, going over our replays to see how we can get better, improve our communication, etc. But I don't want to play with him anymore, or have him on the team, because of the way he handled everything. I don't know how to bring up what happened between him and I with the rest of our teammates, or if I should in the first place. tl;dr: My girlfriend asked to borrow my friend's laptop and she slipped on a water spill while carrying it. The laptop was damaged badly but is repairable. My friend lost his poo poo at my girlfriend even though she apologized and offered to pay for the cost of the repair. He told me I needed to break up with her because of how careless she was, but then he went on some weird rant about how she didn't deserve to date me. He's a member of our team for the video game we play together, and he's irreplaceable. I don't want to play with him, or have him be apart of the team anymore, but I don't know how or if I should bring that up with everyone.
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Feb 4, 2018 01:55
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ArbitraryC posted:sorry autocorrect "doge memes" Much penis
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Feb 4, 2018 01:55
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ArbitraryC posted:this reminds me of the girl who was busting out dodge means in bed. Whenever I [22M] try to initiate sex with my girlfriend [22F] she dodges every thrust and then follows it up with a 15-hit combo into super. How do I counter this?
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Feb 4, 2018 01:56
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Those last 2 
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Feb 4, 2018 02:01
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Smirking_Serpent posted:My [22/M] girlfriend [22/F] accidentally damaged my friend's [21/M] laptop, and he wants me to break up with her because of it, or else he's ending our friendship. Your friend is super jealous of your gf. Open the relationship.
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Feb 4, 2018 02:02
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cock hero flux posted:Whenever I [22M] try to initiate sex with my girlfriend [22F] she dodges every thrust and then follows it up with a 15-hit combo into super. How do I counter this? Youre bursting too early
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Feb 4, 2018 02:03
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/r/relationships: moaning doge memes like "such sex, wow"
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Feb 4, 2018 02:25
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Smirking_Serpent posted:My [22/M] girlfriend [22/F] accidentally damaged my friend's [21/M] laptop, and he wants me to break up with her because of it, or else he's ending our friendship.
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Feb 4, 2018 02:26
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Barudak posted:Youre bursting too early I've never wished SA had an upvote system before this comment
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Feb 4, 2018 02:37
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My [24F] sister-in-law [35F] has finally crossed the line with her hatred for my father.quote:My brother [36M] has been married to my sister in law for 3 years, they have a 10 year old daughter together and have been in a relationship for about 15 years. Before she got pregnant, my sister in law was not allowed in our family home because of some rude comments she made to family friends and for poking around at my parents mail and my mother’s jewelry box. My parents finally agreed to let her in the house and put their differences aside when she got pregnant and we realized she’d probably be sticking around for a while. My SIL and my parents still do not like each other but at least now they complain about each other behind closed doors. What the hell drat breakbone disease did this guy catch in Guatemala? Is that story a cover for CIA experiments? I'm so curious.
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Feb 4, 2018 03:14
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sounds like viral marketing for jumanji to me
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Feb 4, 2018 03:16
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Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:sounds like viral marketing for jumanji to me More like parasitic marketing.
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Feb 4, 2018 03:18
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La Brea Carpet posted:My [24F] sister-in-law [35F] has finally crossed the line with her hatred for my father. Tbh i'm kinda more concerned with what set her off in the first place? It's not really elaborated on or even hinted at which kinda makes me assume the worst.
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Feb 4, 2018 03:22
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La Brea Carpet posted:My [24F] sister-in-law [35F] has finally crossed the line with her hatred for my father. Dad's only regret is that he has boneitis
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Feb 4, 2018 03:26
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ArbitraryC posted:Tbh i'm kinda more concerned with what set her off in the first place? It's not really elaborated on or even hinted at which kinda makes me assume the worst.
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Feb 4, 2018 03:29
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He caused the earthquake, and this IS karma!
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Feb 4, 2018 03:30
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Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:Yeah - I guessed the text was going to inadvertently revealed an obvious justification and then nothing. This thread has trained me to assume the worst for sure. I feel like typically when you see these stories there's at least a cause/effect even if it's disproportionate, they usually spell out what set the person off even if it's just to clarify how unreasonable they're being. This is just weird and makes me wonder if like the dad made a sexual pass at her or something.
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Feb 4, 2018 03:37
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ArbitraryC posted:I feel like typically when you see these stories there's at least a cause/effect even if it's disproportionate, they usually spell out what set the person off even if it's just to clarify how unreasonable they're being. This is just weird and makes me wonder if like the dad made a sexual pass at her or something. Sounds she had been caught or suspected of stealing from them before so is likely that they were unkind to her at some point, but it could have been justified. Or if she is black or brown maybe they accused her because of her race and now she has a well justified hatred of them.
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Feb 4, 2018 03:55
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ArbitraryC posted:I feel like typically when you see these stories there's at least a cause/effect even if it's disproportionate, they usually spell out what set the person off even if it's just to clarify how unreasonable they're being. This is just weird and makes me wonder if like the dad made a sexual pass at her or something. This is absolutely what I thought was going to be the case, I hope she's just a weird jerk though
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Feb 4, 2018 03:59
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Didn't we have a similar post here once? My [21F] parents [50sF/M] took down all the trophies in the house except for my sister's [22F] quote:have five siblings- an older brother (30), two older sisters (27&22), a younger sister (20), and a younger brother (18). My second oldest sister, I'll call her Bebe, is a year apart from me and has always been the golden child- not to say that the rest of us were scapegoats. Bebe did everything. She kept straight As through school, was always MVP or champion on her sports and academic teams. Our parents kept a bunch of shelves for her trophies and medals, and it was always filled. They kept having to add more space. Since the rest of my siblings and I also did athletics and such, we also got shelves for our trophies, but they were never as filled and never as successful as Bebe's. She was competitive, and always a winner. The only sport we ever were equals in was soccer because we played on the same team, but she always got MVP. There was a little resentment, yeah, but I knew it had to be benched. Bebe didn't have an ego or anything, she was just good at what she did, and it wasn't her fault that our parents recognized it. We get along really well. [UPDATE] My [21F] parents [50sF/M] took down all the trophies in the house except for my sister's [22F] quote:So, I spoke to Bebe the night I wrote my post. I pointed out that it was only her trophies on the shelf, and it wasn’t my favorite interaction. I think being away from her for so long definitely changed my perception of her, and I didn’t really notice that she had changed, especially her ego. I showed her each trophy and name plate, and she went, “Well, of course they’re my trophies. When was the last time you got better than bronze?” I asked her if it didn’t upset her that the rest of ours were basically hidden even though we’ve had a lot of dedication to our activities, and she said, “No. Dedication doesn’t make you a winner.” Bebe told me I was wasting her time, told me to “grow up and get over myself.” Then, she went to go hang out with our parents and I think I finally got it. 
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Feb 4, 2018 04:00
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I [25F] am basically mad at the world, how do I stop?quote:u/howdoidothatthough stay mad
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Feb 4, 2018 04:02
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or maybe the person that blames someone's incredibly debilitating disease on karma is just a terrible person
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Feb 4, 2018 04:02
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Absurd Alhazred posted:Didn't we have a similar post here once? Not your fault lady. 66% your parents, 33% Bebe, 1% your goddamn trophy maker. Who the gently caress has that many trophies anyway?
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Feb 4, 2018 04:05
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girl pants posted:This is absolutely what I thought was going to be the case, I hope she's just a weird jerk though yeah that would be ideal I just feel like normally if it's something dumb like "we missed my xil's wedding because of a medical emergency and they never got over it" (which has happened several times itt), the op would have mentioned it. The complete lack of context just gives me an odd niggling that the OP is intentionally leaving something out and "dad is a creeper" unfortunately is p high up in the list of obvious things someone would intentionally not mention.
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Feb 4, 2018 04:10
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Absurd Alhazred posted:Didn't we have a similar post here once? This is why you should never excel at anything. If your never try to excel at anything, you won’t be disappointed when nobody notices you.
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Feb 4, 2018 04:12
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Absurd Alhazred posted:Didn't we have a similar post here once? Look at this family who never learned how to exist on pure spite, what a pile of worthless skin. If someone slights four of you like that, guess what, the four of you pool your resources to abso-loving-complete-lutely destroy their life from top to bottom until you actually start to feel bad from them and then keep going.
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Feb 4, 2018 04:19
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I mean, your parents are probably going to get rid of your childhood trophies sooner or later especially once you’re in your 20s, but just throwing them all in the trash in favor of one child is pretty drat cold. Are people really going to be significantly more impressed by a 1st place trophy from high school than a 2nd place one? Sure it’s better, but it’s high school stuff, who cares? It’s not like the older daughter is some award-winning professional athlete here.
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Feb 4, 2018 04:26
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