Lawyer & Law School Megathread #12: Started Out Barrister, Ended Up Barista

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Lawyer & Law School Megathread #12: Started Out Barrister, Ended Up Barista

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Phil Moscowitz: Feb 19, 2007; If blood be the price of admiralty,
Lord God, we ha' paid in full!

In general I abhor police brutality. But only when it is committed against citizens, so

# ? Feb 8, 2018 00:20

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# ? May 29, 2024 08:46

Roger_Mudd: Jul 18, 2003; Buglord

Phil Moscowitz posted:

In general I abhor police brutality. But only when it is committed against citizens, so

# ? Feb 8, 2018 00:25

Nice piece of fish: Jan 29, 2008; Ultra Carp

Phil Moscowitz posted:

In general I abhor police brutality. But only when it is committed against citizens, so

Thanks, needed that laugh.

gently caress, I'm tired of being an attourney you guys. I'm thinking of quitting and exploring my theoretical interest in... wait, I don't have any loving interests. I have to get one of them first. And it probably shouldn't be "whisky".

# ? Feb 12, 2018 09:21

Mr. Nice!: Oct 13, 2005; bone shaking.
soul baking.

Finally dropped an application in for a job in the first time in almost 15 years. Put in for a few adjunct teaching spots at a local CC because gently caress it why not.

# ? Feb 12, 2018 17:14

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Discendo Vox fucked around with this message at 03:55 on Jul 13, 2021

# ? Feb 12, 2018 17:59

Roger_Mudd: Jul 18, 2003; Buglord

Discendo Vox posted:

Perhaps I can be of help

�@aol.com�

# ? Feb 12, 2018 21:47

Soylent Pudding: Jun 22, 2007; We've got people!

Nice piece of fish posted:

Thanks, needed that laugh.

gently caress, I'm tired of being an attourney you guys. I'm thinking of quitting and exploring my theoretical interest in... wait, I don't have any loving interests. I have to get one of them first. And it probably shouldn't be "whisky".

You can always come be a computer toucher.

# ? Feb 12, 2018 22:08

Vox Nihili: May 28, 2008

Mr. Nice! posted:

Finally dropped an application in for a job in the first time in almost 15 years. Put in for a few adjunct teaching spots at a local CC because gently caress it why not.

Fifteen years!? Do you live in the fifties?

# ? Feb 12, 2018 22:13

Mr. Nice!: Oct 13, 2005; bone shaking.
soul baking.

Vox Nihili posted:

Fifteen years!? Do you live in the fifties?

No, but i enlisted in the navy in 2006 and my last job application was to a gas station i managed. I started that job in 2004 I think, and even then I was a rehire and can�t remember if I had to go through the full application process. So for actually filling out an application, typing up a resume, etc. it has been a long long time.

# ? Feb 12, 2018 22:55

Nice piece of fish: Jan 29, 2008; Ultra Carp

Discendo Vox posted:

Perhaps I can be of help

The Consider Jesus Christ website posted:

The Consider Jesus Christ website is designed to show you how to be saved (how to know you're going to heaven). Information on how to be saved (how to know you're going to heaven) is included in the video and in the articles.

Thanks. But I knew by the first year of law school there was no loving way I was getting anywhere near heaven.

Soylent Pudding posted:

You can always come be a computer toucher.

Uuuuh actually on second thought tell me more about this jesus guy

# ? Feb 12, 2018 22:58

EwokEntourage: Jun 10, 2008; BREYER: Actually, Antonin, you got it backwards. See, a power bottom is actually generating all the dissents by doing most of the work.

SCALIA: Stephen, I've heard that speed has something to do with it.

BREYER: Speed has everything to do with it.

Nice piece of fish posted:

Thanks. But I knew by the first year of law school there was no loving way I was getting anywhere near heaven.

Uuuuh actually on second thought tell me more about this jesus guy

Well first he wants you to kill more Hapsburgs

# ? Feb 12, 2018 23:10

Tokelau All Star: Feb 23, 2008; THE TAXES! THE FINGER THING MEANS THE TAXES!

My wife got a job at Michigan State where she will basically be set for life. Any Michigan law people here with some insight on the legal community there?

# ? Feb 12, 2018 23:46

joat mon: Oct 15, 2009; I am the master of my lamp;
I am the captain of my tub.

Tokelau All Star posted:

My wife got a job at Michigan State where she will basically be set for life. Any Michigan law people here with some insight on the legal community there?

Apparently there's a lot of work defending people who have sex with dead animals.

e: Sorry, it was Wisconsin. Puh-tay-doe, pah-tah-toe?

Bonus: The PD's brief on why it isn't bestiality.

Double Bonus: Citation to The Princess Bride

joat mon fucked around with this message at 00:41 on Feb 13, 2018

# ? Feb 13, 2018 00:11

Hot Dog Day #91: Jun 19, 2003

Tokelau All Star posted:

My wife got a job at Michigan State where she will basically be set for life. Any Michigan law people here with some insight on the legal community there?

Leaving Hawaii for Michigan....

# ? Feb 13, 2018 00:16

nm: Jan 28, 2008; "I saw Minos the Space Judge holding a golden sceptre and passing sentence upon the Martians. There he presided, and around him the noble Space Prosecutors sought the firm justice of space law."

Tokelau All Star posted:

My wife got a job at Michigan State where she will basically be set for life. Any Michigan law people here with some insight on the legal community there?

You're moving from hawaii to michigan. Rip.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 00:17

Mr. Nice!: Oct 13, 2005; bone shaking.
soul baking.

I miss hawaii.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 00:23

Alaemon: Jan 4, 2009; Proctors are guardians of the sanctity and integrity of legal education, therefore they are responsible for the nourishment of the soul.

Tokelau All Star posted:

My wife got a job at Michigan State where she will basically be set for life. Any Michigan law people here with some insight on the legal community there?

I'm one county over. Our court gets a fair number of attorneys from that neck of the woods, but not so often that they all know what they're doing.

Historically, attorneys in the MSU neighborhood can do a brisk trade based on minors in possession and other alcohol-related crimes. The market may be glutted now, because (last I knew, when I went there!) Cooley kept graduating larger and larger classes of students.

MSU is pretty centrally located, so you can take your pick of Ingham, Eaton, Clinton, Jackson, Washtenaw Counties. As with everything else, learning how an individual court works makes all the difference.

Edit: Also, everyone who made the "leaving Hawaii for Michigan" joke is ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. My condolences in advance.

Alaemon fucked around with this message at 00:32 on Feb 13, 2018

# ? Feb 13, 2018 00:30

Kalman: Jan 17, 2010

joat mon posted:

Apparently there's a lot of work defending people who have sex with dead animals.

And live children, since it's MSU.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 00:37

Mr. Nice!: Oct 13, 2005; bone shaking.
soul baking.

Kalman posted:

And live children, since it's MSU.

I thought happy valley had the big 10 pedophilia title on lockdown.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 00:41

Kalman: Jan 17, 2010

Mr. Nice! posted:

I thought happy valley had the big 10 pedophilia title on lockdown.

Nope, Larry Nassar has now made the PSU scandal look small.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 00:42

Mr. Nice!: Oct 13, 2005; bone shaking.
soul baking.

Kalman posted:

Nope, Larry Nassar has now made the PSU scandal look small.

Keeping it B16 up north.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 00:44

nm: Jan 28, 2008; "I saw Minos the Space Judge holding a golden sceptre and passing sentence upon the Martians. There he presided, and around him the noble Space Prosecutors sought the firm justice of space law."

Alaemon posted:

Edit: Also, everyone who made the "leaving Hawaii for Michigan" joke is ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. My condolences in advance.

My dad moved from California to Ann Arbor for law school and also taught at Michigan State (urban planning, not law). He moved back to CA as soon as he could.
This was the 70s though. He was deeply unimpressed with the alcohol selection.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 01:26

Hot Dog Day #91: Jun 19, 2003

I mean I get moving for a spouse, I did it twice and she did it once.

But loving Michigan from Hawaii.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 02:06

Tokelau All Star: Feb 23, 2008; THE TAXES! THE FINGER THING MEANS THE TAXES!

What can I say, I love my wife. I started filling out the bar application today and I forgot how much it suuuucks.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 05:08

Kalman: Jan 17, 2010

Tokelau All Star posted:

What can I say, I love my wife. I started filling out the bar application today and I forgot how much it suuuucks.

If it helps, alcohol options in Michigan these days are excellent.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 05:37

nm: Jan 28, 2008; "I saw Minos the Space Judge holding a golden sceptre and passing sentence upon the Martians. There he presided, and around him the noble Space Prosecutors sought the firm justice of space law."

nm posted:

My dad moved from California to Ann Arbor for law school and also taught at Michigan State (urban planning, not law). He moved back to CA as soon as he could.
This was the 70s though. He was deeply unimpressed with the alcohol selection.

I talked to my dad today and brought up your situation.
He sat in stunned silence for a bit, then started cracking up and said "that's unfortunate."
He also said it is too bad she couldn't get a job at Michigan because Ann Arbor is much nicer.

Have fun. Maybe stay in hawaii for a year or two to make sure this MSU thing works out?

# ? Feb 13, 2018 07:02

The Kingfish: Oct 21, 2015

Michigan is beautiful, especially Ann Arbor. Just trick yourself into thinking it's what you want.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 07:25

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Discendo Vox fucked around with this message at 03:55 on Jul 13, 2021

# ? Feb 13, 2018 07:40

nm: Jan 28, 2008; "I saw Minos the Space Judge holding a golden sceptre and passing sentence upon the Martians. There he presided, and around him the noble Space Prosecutors sought the firm justice of space law."

The Kingfish posted:

Michigan is beautiful, especially Ann Arbor. Just trick yourself into thinking it's what you want.

He's moving to Lansing though (unless his wife's going to have a long commute).

# ? Feb 13, 2018 08:32

Nice piece of fish: Jan 29, 2008; Ultra Carp

Discendo Vox posted:

Have you considered Detroit, my friend? Just move directly from Hawaii to downtown Detroit. Really get to know the place. Maybe run for local office.

No seriously, I think you're a lock for it. There's a lot of arguing about text and the intent, you can set your own hours and fees, drinking at work is strongly encouraged...

Wait, are you jewish? I hear their lead is jewish.

Just be aware, at F, S & HS you really have to kill yourself to make partner.

I'm not jewish, but I have strong sympathies. Anyway, I think I'd have some issues with the internal logic

Tim Minchin posted:

Life is like an ocean voyage
And our bodies are the ships
And without a moral compass
We would all be cast adrift

So to keep us on our bearings
The Lord gave us a gift
And like most gifts you get
It was a book

I only read one book
But it's a good book, don't you know
I act the way I act because
The Good Book tells me so
If I want to know how to be good
It's to the Good Book that I go
Cause the Good Book is a book
And it is good and it's a book

I know the Good Book's good because
The Good Book says it's good
I know the Good Book knows it's good
Because a really good book would

Somewhat along the lines of the rest of my country, who is just about 80% atheist or agnostic. I'm such a conformist, I know.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 09:43

Toona the Cat: Jun 9, 2004; The Greatest

L&LS Megathread #13: are you Jewish? Needs to be a thing that happens eventually

# ? Feb 13, 2018 20:53

mastershakeman: Oct 28, 2008; by vyelkin

Toona the Cat posted:

L&LS Megathread #13: are you Jewish? Needs to be a thing that happens eventually

lets wait 40 more pages

# ? Feb 13, 2018 21:02

Pook Good Mook: Aug 6, 2013; ENFORCE THE UNITED STATES DRESS CODE AT ALL COSTS!

This message paid for by the Men's Wearhouse& Jos A Bank Lobbying Group

mastershakeman posted:

lets wait 40 more pages

# ? Feb 13, 2018 23:04

Abugadu: Jul 12, 2004; 1st Sgt. Matthews and the men have Procured for me a cummerbund from a traveling gypsy, who screeched Victory shall come at a Terrible price. i am Honored.

Learn how to disc golf.

Also, my job today - land records comes up with a handful of probate/deeds, situation is:

A dies, having owned a large tract of land, with 5 heirs. Instead of a probate, there's a civil suit among the heirs, with confusing language that says 'Heir B gets a 1/5 share of the tract, consisting of Lot X'

Heir B then dies, with 4 heirs - but their attorney screws up and says they each get a 1/20th share of Lot X.

One of those heirs, C, dies and that probate gives his 1/20th share to the single heir (thank god) of that estate, D.

D does a warranty deed via sale of 1/20th of Lot X to E.

E does a warranty deed via sale of 1/20th of Lot X to F.

Attorneys for B then realize their mistake and correct the probate to say 1/4th share of Lot X for the heirs of B.

One of C's co-heirs is now coming in asking for a certificate of title that reflects the current state of affairs.

Also, my desk is bereft of whiskey.

# ? Feb 14, 2018 02:09

Pook Good Mook: Aug 6, 2013; ENFORCE THE UNITED STATES DRESS CODE AT ALL COSTS!

This message paid for by the Men's Wearhouse& Jos A Bank Lobbying Group

Abugadu posted:

Learn how to disc golf.

Also, my job today - land records comes up with a handful of probate/deeds, situation is:

A dies, having owned a large tract of land, with 5 heirs. Instead of a probate, there's a civil suit among the heirs, with confusing language that says 'Heir B gets a 1/5 share of the tract, consisting of Lot X'

Heir B then dies, with 4 heirs - but their attorney screws up and says they each get a 1/20th share of Lot X.

One of those heirs, C, dies and that probate gives his 1/20th share to the single heir (thank god) of that estate, D.

D does a warranty deed via sale of 1/20th of Lot X to E.

E does a warranty deed via sale of 1/20th of Lot X to F.

Attorneys for B then realize their mistake and correct the probate to say 1/4th share of Lot X for the heirs of B.

One of C's co-heirs is now coming in asking for a certificate of title that reflects the current state of affairs.

Also, my desk is bereft of whiskey.

Last Thursday I had to tell a client of mine that even though we had a court order allowing it, and even with his family putting up the money, the Sheriff wouldn't let any of his deputies volunteer for overtime so my client could be escorted from the jail to a funeral to say goodbye to his father.

I would rather have that conversation 10 more times before I dealt with an inter-family land squabble like this poo poo.

# ? Feb 14, 2018 02:15

Toona the Cat: Jun 9, 2004; The Greatest

mastershakeman posted:

lets wait 40 more pages

# ? Feb 14, 2018 07:29

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Discendo Vox fucked around with this message at 03:55 on Jul 13, 2021

# ? Feb 14, 2018 08:23

Nice piece of fish: Jan 29, 2008; Ultra Carp

Abugadu posted:

Learn how to disc golf.

Also, my job today - land records comes up with a handful of probate/deeds, situation is:

A dies, having owned a large tract of land, with 5 heirs. Instead of a probate, there's a civil suit among the heirs, with confusing language that says 'Heir B gets a 1/5 share of the tract, consisting of Lot X'

Heir B then dies, with 4 heirs - but their attorney screws up and says they each get a 1/20th share of Lot X.

One of those heirs, C, dies and that probate gives his 1/20th share to the single heir (thank god) of that estate, D.

D does a warranty deed via sale of 1/20th of Lot X to E.

E does a warranty deed via sale of 1/20th of Lot X to F.

Attorneys for B then realize their mistake and correct the probate to say 1/4th share of Lot X for the heirs of B.

One of C's co-heirs is now coming in asking for a certificate of title that reflects the current state of affairs.

Also, my desk is bereft of whiskey.

Jesus. My worst ever was 1/128th of a title, took me two years because heirs kept dying and whiskey was absolutely required.

mastershakeman posted:

lets wait 40 more pages

Had to google this and :stare:

# ? Feb 14, 2018 08:43

Hot Dog Day #91: Jun 19, 2003

Gonna need an explainer on 40 pages guys.

# ? Feb 14, 2018 15:13

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# ? May 29, 2024 08:46

ulmont: Sep 15, 2010; IF I EVER MISS VOTING IN AN ELECTION (EVEN AMERICAN IDOL) ,OR HAVE UNPAID PARKING TICKETS, PLEASE TAKE AWAY MY FRANCHISE

Hot Dog Day #91 posted:

Gonna need an explainer on 40 pages guys.

You should be able to figure out why page 14/88 would be the right one to raise the Jewish Question.

# ? Feb 14, 2018 15:17

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Lawyer & Law School Megathread #12: Started Out Barrister, Ended Up Barista

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