Help! I've turned into a Cat! Let's Play Choice of the Cat!

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > Help! I've turned into a Cat! Let's Play Choice of the Cat!

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AJ_Impy: Jun 17, 2007; SWORD OF SMATTAS. CAN YOU NOT HEAR A WORLD CRY OUT FOR JUSTICE? WHEN WILL YOU DELIVER IT?; Yam Slacker

Corpse pile! Sleep and hide!

# ? Feb 9, 2018 03:32

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# ? Jun 9, 2024 11:07

bibliosabreur: Oct 21, 2017

Corpse pile! I don't know about getting close to the small humanling; it might bite, or drool, or otherwise disrespect us.

# ? Feb 9, 2018 04:42

POOL IS CLOSED: Jul 14, 2011; I'm just exploding with mackerel. This is the aji wo kutta of my discontent.; Pillbug

Feets are for sleeps! A cat knows the warmest spot is the best. Plus there may be blanket mice about.

# ? Feb 9, 2018 04:45

VivaLa Eeveelution: Apr 3, 2011

Where's the option to sit on the human's chest and dig one's claws near her jugular vein...or is that just my cat?

Very well. We shall settle for the feet seat.

dont be mean to me posted:

Morgana is trying to NOT get thrown out of a loving-ish home.

Hmm, true enough. Though I'm inclined to believe it's a coincidence of seasonal timing, my cat's place in the family was properly established before she started pulling that trick. (Purely - too much so in my irrelevant human opinion - in pursuit of warm, it was clear.)

VivaLa Eeveelution fucked around with this message at 09:56 on Feb 9, 2018

# ? Feb 9, 2018 05:36

dont be mean to me: May 2, 2007; I'm interplanetary, bitch
Let's go to Mars

VivaLa Eeveelution posted:

Where's the option to sit on the human's chest and dig one's claws near her jugular vein...or is that just my cat?

Very well. We shall settle for the feet seat.

Morgana is trying to NOT get thrown out of a loving-ish home. And with cat-bashing neighbors, no less.

# ? Feb 9, 2018 05:37

MR. J: Nov 22, 2011; Chuck and Fuck

No cat rear end to face option? In that case sleep under the stars.

# ? Feb 9, 2018 07:38

where the red fern gropes: Aug 24, 2011

feet

# ? Feb 9, 2018 10:11

Comstar: Apr 20, 2007; Are you happy now?

feet.

# ? Feb 9, 2018 10:42

Thesaya: May 17, 2011; I am a Plant.

Thesaya posted:

Moon's room. She seems the least comfortable with us and thus, as a cat, she is who we will want to be closest to, in lieu of any allergic people.

Since this is the reason I voted for her room, I will use the same reason argument for sleeping at her feet.

# ? Feb 9, 2018 17:26

SimplyUnknown1: Aug 18, 2017; Cat Cat Cat

Ok, no one wanted to leave Moon's room, so that made things a bit easier. It was pretty close for a while, but sleeping at Moon's feet pulled ahead with 8 votes to both corpses and window's 4.

quote:

You leap onto Moon's narrow bed, careful not to move enough to wake her. Down near her feet, you turn a few times before settling into a ball.

...Well, that's underwhelming.

quote:

It is probably 7:00 AM when you're assaulted awake by a clumsy hand pummeling your head.

"A bit more gently, dear," says Claire, who's leaning at the door with a smile on her face. "That's it."

But it very much isn't. You might even be seeing stars as you leap off the bed to escape Moon.

"See? I knew you guys could make friends." Claire could not look more pleased with you as you stumble outside to the hall. For your part, you're too groggy to know how to react. You've gone up in Claire's esteem, though�and Moon's too, unfortunately.

You have a feeling day two will be an interesting day.

Well, at least we got Claire and Moon to like us a bit more.

quote:

Chapter 2: The Mystery in the Kitchen
You make your way downstairs, leaving the family to their various morning routines.

The living-room door is open, and you take the opportunity to use the litter box in peace and quiet. When you're done, you stretch, pointing each leg in turn out behind you as far as it will go. The mute screen of the television reflects your feline form, and you wander over to sniff its cool, flat surface.

You're hungry. Somewhere around, there'll be a room where all the food lives. It means there are still doors you need to train these humans to open�doors like�with a sense of discomfort, it occurs to you that the only door that's been closed the entire time you've been here is the room with the snuffling noises. All other rooms have showed no signs or smell of proper food stores�no big white appliances for making food cold, no strange magic surfaces for making food cooked.

As you're wondering what to do, Claire's silk robe swishes past your whiskers. She's on a mission for some coffee, which will mean she's actually heading for the food room. You trot behind her�she's an escort and potentially a guard. The thought emboldens you, and you make it to the shut door before she does. As she blearily fails to catch up, you:

-Start scratching at the door as a blatant command that Claire should open it.
-Steer her by getting under her feet, thus subtly ensuring she goes where I want her to.
-Sit staring at her expectantly. My very existence should remind her of her responsibilities.
-Frantically find a place to hide in the laundry room until Claire has gone in first.

Ok, we made it to chapter 2! YAY! Now, what do we do with Claire? Do we:

1. Start scratching at the door as a blatant command that Claire should open it.
2. Steer her by getting under her feet, thus subtly ensuring she goes where I want her to.
3. Sit staring at her expectantly. My very existence should remind her of her responsibilities.
4. Frantically find a place to hide in the laundry room until Claire has gone in first.

quote:

Cat Treats Acquired: 2
Mice Hunted: 0
Contempt: 37% Affection: 63%
Audacious: 52% Cautious: 48%
Manipulative: 49% Demanding: 51%
Self-Interested: 59% Loyal: 41%
Feral: 53% Domesticated: 47%
Fun-Loving: 55% Comfort-Seeking: 45%
Logical: 45% Intuitive: 55%
Claire's Dislike: 33% Claire's Like: 67%
Andre's Dislike: 39% Andre's Like: 61%
Moon: is intrigued by you.
Bene: hasn't met you yet.
Maddox: hasn't met you yet.

# ? Feb 10, 2018 15:20

Thesaya: May 17, 2011; I am a Plant.

Stare

# ? Feb 10, 2018 16:01

AJ_Impy: Jun 17, 2007; SWORD OF SMATTAS. CAN YOU NOT HEAR A WORLD CRY OUT FOR JUSTICE? WHEN WILL YOU DELIVER IT?; Yam Slacker

Human, I'm looking at you.

# ? Feb 10, 2018 16:20

ultrafilter: Aug 23, 2007; It's okay if you have any questions.

Scratch.

# ? Feb 10, 2018 16:51

achtungnight: Oct 5, 2014; I get my fun here. Enjoy!

Stare

# ? Feb 10, 2018 17:35

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

The obvious choice is :catstare:

# ? Feb 10, 2018 17:59

dont be mean to me: May 2, 2007; I'm interplanetary, bitch
Let's go to Mars

# ? Feb 10, 2018 18:44

Avalerion: Oct 19, 2012

Stare.

# ? Feb 10, 2018 20:02

Deadmeat5150: Nov 21, 2005; OLD MAN YELLS AT CLAN

I go by what both my cats do. :catstare:

# ? Feb 10, 2018 20:54

Comstar: Apr 20, 2007; Are you happy now?

1. Start scratching at the door as a blatant command that Claire should open it.

# ? Feb 10, 2018 23:57

Space Kablooey: May 6, 2009

Stare

# ? Feb 11, 2018 00:25

Slaan: Mar 16, 2009; ASHERAH DEMANDS I FEAST, I VOTE FOR A FEAST OF FLESH

# ? Feb 11, 2018 03:42

SimplyUnknown1: Aug 18, 2017; Cat Cat Cat

...Ok, is my cat the only one who tries to steer me places? Because no one voted for that or hiding. Two people voted for scratching at the door, but staring pulled ahead with 9 votes. So now, we must stare! :stare:

quote:

"Aw. You're hungry, aren't you, Morgana? Let's find something nice for you." You hope she hasn't forgotten the total lack of cat food.

Claire turns the handle.

"Ugh!" She falls back a step as a leaping yellow beast hits her paws-first in the chest. As she struggles with its great, licking jaws, you feel all of your hair stand on end. A wet nose. Massive eyes. A smell that is utterly, reekingly, unmistakably dog.

Oh boy. Looks like we've got a rival for "Best Pet" in this household.

quote:

"I know, Bene, I know," says Claire. "A whole night by yourself just waiting to meet Morgana." The dog called Bene has made Claire's morning brighter in one wag of that tail, despite what looks to you more like a wrestling match than the cross-species hug it actually is. She rubs Bene's shoulders vigorously with both hands before taking his paws and placing them gently on the carpet. Bene continues to wash her face with his tongue until Claire straightens up.

"Good dog, good dog," Claire says, wiping her mouth as Bene opts for dashing around on all fours instead. She grabs him, soothing his excitement as best she can as she leads him farther into the kitchen. "Patience, my love. You can meet Morgana when you're less likely to freak her out with your enthusiasm."

She turns and locates you with her eyes.

Bene slips out of his collar.

"Bene, no!" Claire calls after him as his flapping ears and lumbering paws head for you. "Come here!"

But Bene does not come here. In fact, there's almost no time to think about whether he's a potential ally or whether it's safer to scare him into obedience. No sooner has Claire cried out a warning�that Bene "just wants to be friends"�than this great canine creature is upon you, tongue lolling, a jovial spring in his step. He is:

-Obviously going to crush me.
-Clearly keen to play.
-A graceless, slavering fool in need of a lesson.
-Overwhelming, whatever the hell he is thinking.

From the sound of it, Bene is probably a labrador or a golden retriever. Either way, he's bigger than us. So what do we think of Bene? Do we think he is:

1. Obviously going to crush me.
2. Clearly keen to play.
3. A graceless, slavering fool in need of a lesson.
4. Overwhelming, whatever the hell he is thinking.

quote:

Cat Treats Acquired: 2
Mice Hunted: 0
Contempt: 37% Affection: 63%
Audacious: 52% Cautious: 48%
Manipulative: 49% Demanding: 51%
Self-Interested: 63% Loyal: 37%
Feral: 53% Domesticated: 47%
Fun-Loving: 55% Comfort-Seeking: 45%
Logical: 45% Intuitive: 55%
Claire's Dislike: 33% Claire's Like: 67%
Andre's Dislike: 39% Andre's Like: 61%
Moon: is intrigued by you.
Bene: is amenable to you, for now.
Maddox: hasn't met you yet.

...Well, that's ominous.

# ? Feb 12, 2018 22:57

Avalerion: Oct 19, 2012

Keen to play!

# ? Feb 12, 2018 23:00

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

He needs to be taught a lesson. :catstare:

# ? Feb 12, 2018 23:03

Slaan: Mar 16, 2009; ASHERAH DEMANDS I FEAST, I VOTE FOR A FEAST OF FLESH

Haifisch posted:

He needs to be taught a lesson.

The slavering fool

# ? Feb 12, 2018 23:09

achtungnight: Oct 5, 2014; I get my fun here. Enjoy!

Teach him a lesson CLAWS!

My cats steer me sometimes, although they usually stare or yowl to get my attention while doing so.

# ? Feb 12, 2018 23:25

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

My cat's a "meow as frequently and loudly as possible until I get what I want" type, but that wasn't an option for the last vote so I went with the next best thing.

# ? Feb 12, 2018 23:27

dont be mean to me: May 2, 2007; I'm interplanetary, bitch
Let's go to Mars

This is 'Let's Play', is it not.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 00:04

ultrafilter: Aug 23, 2007; It's okay if you have any questions.

What a fool.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 01:31

Space Kablooey: May 6, 2009

He is going to crush me

Space Kablooey fucked around with this message at 02:23 on Feb 13, 2018

# ? Feb 13, 2018 01:40

POOL IS CLOSED: Jul 14, 2011; I'm just exploding with mackerel. This is the aji wo kutta of my discontent.; Pillbug

dont be mean to me posted:

This is 'Let's Play', is it not.

My cat had a dog friend. :3:

LP with Bene.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 01:46

where the red fern gropes: Aug 24, 2011

dont be mean to me posted:

This is 'Let's Play', is it not.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 02:19

AJ_Impy: Jun 17, 2007; SWORD OF SMATTAS. CAN YOU NOT HEAR A WORLD CRY OUT FOR JUSTICE? WHEN WILL YOU DELIVER IT?; Yam Slacker

3. When our second cat was a kitten, he reacted to our much, much bigger first cat by being considerably more aggressive. The bigger they are, the harder they yipe when you swipe.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 02:20

bibliosabreur: Oct 21, 2017

Heart says to teach the great fool a lesson, but head says to play with the big thing. We can always manipulate the lummox later on when we've gotten its affection. _{My cat and my dog, both strictly outdoors pets, have taken to snuggling against each other when sleeping and it is so incredibly cute}

# ? Feb 13, 2018 03:25

nonrev: Jul 15, 2012

Let's Play

# ? Feb 13, 2018 04:44

Willie Tomg: Feb 2, 2006

Play all day.

# ? Feb 13, 2018 22:53

Gwaint: Oct 22, 2010; "Music is the truth. Just listen..."

Let's play!

# ? Feb 14, 2018 17:37

Aesculus: Mar 22, 2013

Let us play. Please may we play. Allow us to play.

# ? Feb 14, 2018 21:36

SimplyUnknown1: Aug 18, 2017; Cat Cat Cat

Ok, no one thought of Bene as overwhelming and only one person thinks that he'll crush us. Teaching him a lesson pulled an early lead with 5 votes, but was soundly trounced by those who wanted to play with a total of 9. So Let's Play!

quote:

As Bene comes hurtling toward you, you're unsure if he'll stop or if he'll bowl you into orbit. Surely a dog as keen to be playmates as this one could not be that stupid. At least, that's what you think in the milliseconds you have to consider it. The abrupt halt must be coming�and he'll do that thing that all dogs do, where they sniff all the bits of you that humans find smelly or offensive.

All things so quickly considered, you decide to:

Hold my ground so he can sniff me. I'm sure we can be friends.
Dive out of the way. My instincts scream that his friendship could be dangerous.
Play a fun chasing game with him (which surreptitiously doubles as running away).

Ok so we've decided that we want to make friends. How will we make friends? Do we:

1. Hold my ground so he can sniff me. I'm sure we can be friends.
2. Dive out of the way. My instincts scream that his friendship could be dangerous.
3. Play a fun chasing game with him (which surreptitiously doubles as running away).

quote:

Cat Treats Acquired: 2
Mice Hunted: 0
Contempt: 37% Affection: 63%
Audacious: 52% Cautious: 48%
Manipulative: 49% Demanding: 51%
Self-Interested: 63% Loyal: 37%
Feral: 53% Domesticated: 47%
Fun-Loving: 55% Comfort-Seeking: 45%
Logical: 45% Intuitive: 55%
Claire's Dislike: 33% Claire's Like: 67%
Andre's Dislike: 39% Andre's Like: 61%
Moon: is intrigued by you.
Bene: is amenable to you, for now.
Maddox: hasn't met you yet.

And that also did nothing.

# ? Feb 14, 2018 22:55

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# ? Jun 9, 2024 11:07

achtungnight: Oct 5, 2014; I get my fun here. Enjoy!

Chasing game! Preferably as destructive as possible, this home could use some excitement methinks.

# ? Feb 14, 2018 23:05

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > Help! I've turned into a Cat! Let's Play Choice of the Cat!

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