/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

God you�re a loving baby

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:01

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# ? Jun 11, 2024 20:40

zakharov: Nov 30, 2002; Tater Love

Blade Runner posted:

All the people saying "just don't go to the party!" as though that will go over entirely fine with the kind of person who literally goes to her room and cries over her husband bringing beer to a party

It wasn't bringing beer, it was purposefully turning the event into the exact thing his wife didn't want. If he'd just put beer in the fridge I doubt she would have cared.

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:02

andrew smash: Jun 26, 2006; smooth soul

Blade Runner posted:

All the people saying "just don't go to the party!" as though that will go over entirely fine with the kind of person who literally goes to her room and cries over her husband bringing beer to a party

if it's not immediately clear to you why a hypothetical situation in which all her friends responded "this sounds boring, gently caress you" and she then posted about how her friends didn't want to come to her party on reddit is different from what actually happened you are real stupid

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:03

DLC Inc: Jun 1, 2011

lol at thinking that going to "retarded bullshit" sounds supportive tho

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:03

Danaru: Jun 5, 2012; 何 ??

Honestly I'd happily go to a friend's wine and cheese party, but I'd still roast them about how bougie the concept of a wine and cheese in suits party is. Husband's a massive douchebag and I feel like the friends didn't realize it wasn't part of her plan considering they told her what a great time they had.

"Cheese Questionnaire" is just such a beautiful combination of words though. cheese questionnaire

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:04

Crespolini: Mar 9, 2014

if you can't stand to indulge your partner for one night maybe just save everybody some time and break up. like sit in the corner with some merlot in a sippy cup for the three hours or whatever this thing is gonna last

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:04

Clark Nova: Jul 18, 2004

DLC Inc posted:

lol at thinking that going to "retarded bullshit" sounds supportive tho

You don�t tell them their bullshit is retarded :ssh:

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:05

boner confessor: Apr 25, 2013; by R. Guyovich

Crimpolioni posted:

if you can't stand to indulge your partner for one night maybe just save everybody some time and break up. like sit in the corner with some merlot in a sippy cup for the three hours or whatever this thing is gonna last

yeah in between goons arguing about what kind of party is objectively best we're missing the point that assuming this totally not fake story actually happened these two are cruising for a divorce simply because the husband is a dudebro

cant wait for their next post about how he farted continuously and loudly during the opera his wife dragged him to

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:06

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

DLC Inc posted:

lol at thinking that going to "retarded bullshit" sounds supportive tho

Steampunk

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:07

Blade Runner: Aug 14, 2015

luv 2 question cheese

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:07

Skutter: Apr 8, 2007; Well you can fuck that sky high!

Danaru posted:

Honestly I'd happily go to a friend's wine and cheese party, but I'd still roast them about how bougie the concept of a wine and cheese in suits party is. Husband's a massive douchebag and I feel like the friends didn't realize it wasn't part of her plan considering they told her what a great time they had.

"Cheese Questionnaire" is just such a beautiful combination of words though. cheese questionnaire

The pro move there would have been to bring a block of Velveeta and a 1.5L bottle of Arbor Mist.

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:08

Motronic: Nov 6, 2009

Al Borland Corp. posted:

I hate it when Onslo busts in with beer, looks around, loudly says "Aw nice" and ruins my candlelight suppers. My sister Violet was mortified. No, no, Violet, with a Porsche and a hot tub and room for a pony. Though not in the hot tub of course!

Cheese questionnaire.

Also. It's bouquet.

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:09

LadyPictureShow: Nov 18, 2005; Success!

Admiral Ray posted:

Posting this based on the title alone.

I [20/F] found out my boyfriend [23/M] has been poking holes in our condoms.. now I'm pregnant. Relationships (self.relationships)

edit: loving murder him

I feel so bad for her. Feeling guilty because she feels like she should have what... had the foresight that he would sabotage their birth control.

Listen to mom, report him to command, also to the police if possible (is sexual deception/�stealthing� a punishable offense?), get the abortion, get a restraining order.

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:09

andrew smash: Jun 26, 2006; smooth soul

Pick posted:

Steampunk

if you're not a steampunk person and you get invited to a steampunk party, what do you wear? Do you just hot glue some plastic cogs to a vest and call it a night?

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:10

Barudak: May 7, 2007

Its all about knowing the audience, if he had shown up with all 3 franzia flavors and shouted out �Whose ready for the Tour de Franzia� it would have gone better.

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:10

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

In fact it is possible to have wine, cheese, beer, and hip-hop at the same party, without it being stuffy or a college rager. I am assuming her party was dumb and stuffy because of how eager her friends were to pound some buds and start dancing. Perhaps that isn't a fair assumption.

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:11

andrew smash: Jun 26, 2006; smooth soul

Barudak posted:

Its all about knowing the audience, if he had shown up with all 3 franzia flavors and shouted out �Whose ready for the Tour de Franzia� it would have gone better.

lmao

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:11

welcome to hell: Jun 9, 2006

the resulting party sounds pretty decent. start with something fancy, then later get trashed. but that isn't what was agreed on and the husband was an rear end in a top hat for purposely going against the wife's plans.

cheese questionnaire reminds me of this story that has probably been reposted a few times but is still hilarious.

[25 F] My Fiance Does Not Respect My Wishes/Lifestyle

quote:

Hello everyone, I have a bit of a conundrum. My fianc� is a great guy and we agree on most matters. However, he's gotten increasingly mean about my hobby/lifestyle (if that's what it can be called).

BACKGROUND (you can skip this): I'll give some background to try and explain the situation more, if it helps any. We both grew up in stable middle class households. During my junior year I was feeling very lost, depressed and didn't really have much I was passionate about. Weirdly enough, I came across a story about Emily Post and etiquette. I really liked the little rules and information on manners and started following her teachings. I never understood what was going on with me, but what clothes to wear to a wedding versus a party made sense and was easy to comprehend. I've never forced it on anyone else or looked down on other people for not following 'manners' like I do. I just really enjoy living my life like this and from time to time I might sit down with an etiquette book.

PROBLEM (you can skim the first part of this as well): Now to the problem. My fianc� doesn't have much interest in etiquette and I don't blame him. I don't force much on him or rant about how he's classless or something. I think it's polite to hang up your coat and hat, and at the beginning of the relationship my fianc� would. Now he'll walk past the coat hanger and just toss his things on my couch, or just drop them at the door. Every week I like to set up a formal dinner. I'll set the table with the multiple forks and spoons. I make sure not to do too many courses to overwhelm or confuse my fianc�.

I always try to be polite and understanding, as I realize these are things not everyone does. Before if I set up a formal dinner I'd explain through out the meal very quickly how things worked, like I'd say, "oh that's dinner knife because it's the largest one you'll wait until the entree to use it." He was nice about it at first, and he learned quickly. Now he'll use random spoons and forks for things, and I've learned to accept it because if I say anything he'll say I'm being annoying or posh or stupid and that it doesn't matter. Just last week though, I made a three course meal (salad, steak and a tart). Instead of allowing me to bring the items out like you normally do, he took all the food and put it on his plate at once. I told him this made me a bit upset, as I put a lot of time cooking the food from scratch and was hoping to have a nice dinner. He responded by getting up, taking his food and throwing it away saying, "if that's how I was going to be he wouldn't eat any of my food again". This really hurt my feelings and I ended up crying in the bathroom. He apologized in the morning and said he had a stressful day at work before leaving really early.

Tonight he was awful. I have a friend, Mary, who likes doing things like I do. We went to her place tonight and she had set up a lovely five course meal, I explained to her my fianc� isn't too good at table manners beforehand and she said it's not a problem. We began with salad. My fianc� ate the salad with the oyster fork, when I gently pointed out that it's for oysters and not salad even though it's further on the outside he said, "I know I just don't give a drat," really loudly. I smiled and apologized for bothering him. Dinner was very awkward after that, as he refused to talk much and pretty much ignored Mary and her husband. When we left he started yelling I was always badgering him on stupid etiquette and he doesn't need to be told how to eat and that I'm a low class bastard pretending to be some royal person.

TLDR: I'm really into etiquette, my fianc� is not. I've tried to get him to do basic stuff, like know what spoon to use in a multiple course dinner and he's gotten very hostile and mean about it.

What can I do to remedy this problem? Should I just stop pushing him?

EDIT: Fiance is 25 male.'

UPDATE: I will talk to my fiance tonight and discuss stopping the dinners or modifying them to make him more uncomfortable. Due to some comments I realized it wasn't okay for him to insult me or call me names and I will talk to him about that as well. Thank you for the nice people who actually gave advice, instead of insulting me and offering nothing constructive. I won't correct him in public anymore, but I'm not quite sure it's equal to him calling me a bastard, as some people seem to glaze over.

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:11

CheesyDog: Jul 4, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

Obviously they should have done exit polling

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:12

boner confessor: Apr 25, 2013; by R. Guyovich

therobit posted:

I am assuming her party was dumb and stuffy because of how eager her friends were to pound some buds and start dancing. Perhaps that isn't a fair assumption.

people will do anything if you get them drunk enough. just because the party shifted doesn't mean people weren't having fun at the previous version of the party, this is an assumption people make based on their own party preferences (largely based on age)

the wife is upset because she feels like her party was hijacked by her loutish husband. whether or not the party enjoyment was optimized doesn't matter

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:13

LadyPictureShow: Nov 18, 2005; Success!

Here�s an actually funny story about sabotage!

Can I [25m] ask my girlfriend [20f] to sign an abortion agreement?

quote:

My girlfriend is 20 and I'm 25. We met on OkCupid and have been in a long-distance relationship for 8 months. We are talking about going on a vacation to Hawaii in September, but I am getting nervous.

I am worried that she will use this as an opportunity to get pregnant and force me to be a part of her life forever, drastically altering my life in every way conceivable. We haven't met or had sex together yet, and I'm a virgin. I do trust her in general, but not in the concept of birth control. She says she will go to her OB/GYN around July to get birth control, which seems way too casual. She does not want me to use a condom, and I feel like even if I do insist, she will find a way to sabotage my condoms. It's putting a whole bunch of stress on my life (which is loving great and a baby in the near future would ruin it).

I am worried that nine months after this vacation I will suddenly have a child across the country that I can't ever visit and have to pay child support (that I can't afford) for because my girlfriend took initiative.

Is there a way I can create a legal agreement signed by both of us that says we both consent to and will arrange an abortion if a pregnancy occurs? What if she doesn't abort it?

tl;dr - I am worried that my girlfriend may try to get pregnant without my consent or knowledge

Luckily everyone was calling him goddamn insane.

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:15

Vargatron: Apr 19, 2008; MRAZZLE DAZZLE

CheesyDog posted:

*puts on Frank Sinatra playlist*

I have declared this party...
CLASSY

Things kind of fell apart when Ruff Ryder's Anthem appeared on the playlist.

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:15

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

andrew smash posted:

if you're not a steampunk person and you get invited to a steampunk party, what do you wear? Do you just hot glue some plastic cogs to a vest and call it a night?

dolce & gabbana circa 2004

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:15

Blade Runner: Aug 14, 2015

welcome to hell posted:

the resulting party sounds pretty decent. start with something fancy, then later get trashed. but that isn't what was agreed on and the husband was an rear end in a top hat for purposely going against the wife's plans.

cheese questionnaire reminds me of this story that has probably been reposted a few times but is still hilarious.

[25 F] My Fiance Does Not Respect My Wishes/Lifestyle

Get Duff Man on this

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:16

John Wick of Dogs: Mar 4, 2017; A real hellraiser

If he's that worried he can get a vasectomy. They can be undone

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:16

AnoHito: May 8, 2014

The husband's exact level of douchiness (maximum) aside, can we at least all agree that that party was short at least three guillotines?

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:17

Clark Nova: Jul 18, 2004

Asking a woman to sign an abortion contract has got to be the most effective form of birth control ever devised.

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:17

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Oh poo poo, gently caress, 2006. 2006!! God! What a blunder!! :doh:

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:18

Vargatron: Apr 19, 2008; MRAZZLE DAZZLE

Pick posted:

dolce & gabbana circa 2004

No, RiFF RAFF circa 2013

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxLS-cpgbe0

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:18

tactlessbastard: Feb 4, 2001; Godspeed, post; Fun Shoe

I see a lot of brave heroes of the proletariat here striking a principled blow against wine and cheese :ussr:

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:19

andrew smash: Jun 26, 2006; smooth soul

Pick posted:

dolce & gabbana circa 2004

i googled this because i have no idea what that looks like
a. you're right
b. it linked to this, which i don't even have words for https://www.vogue.com/fashion-shows/fall-2018-menswear/dolce-gabbana/slideshow/collection

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:21

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

andrew smash posted:

i googled this because i have no idea what that looks like
a. you're right
b. it linked to this, which i don't even have words for https://www.vogue.com/fashion-shows/fall-2018-menswear/dolce-gabbana/slideshow/collection

Seriously though, it was 2006

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:22

andrew smash: Jun 26, 2006; smooth soul

it's like regency with a lil bit of warhammer 40k for flavor

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:26

DACK FAYDEN: Feb 25, 2013; Bear Witness

Danaru posted:

"Cheese Questionnaire" is just such a beautiful combination of words though. cheese questionnaire

pretend I took the effort to mock up "steamed hams but it's calling a 'ballot' a 'cheese questionnaire' in Wisconsin"

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:27

Cough Drop The Beat: Jan 22, 2012; by Lowtax

Admiral Ray posted:

I [20/F] found out my boyfriend [23/M] has been poking holes in our condoms.. now I'm pregnant. Relationships (self.relationships)

Just call the cops, push hard for a restraining order, and get an abortion immediately. Don't keep posting on reddit. Don't pass Go. Get the gently caress out of that relationship and don't look back.

# ? Feb 27, 2018 19:27