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It was a good run, but it's time to gas the thread.
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Mar 17, 2018 07:06
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All we need is to give each other a little Elven Love: http://store.steampowered.com/app/798590/Elven_Love/
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Mar 17, 2018 07:10
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Are the elves at least 1000 years old?
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Mar 17, 2018 07:43
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FirstAidKite posted:Really? Is that seriously the argument you're going for, trying to argue against a serious issue by replacing minors with tanks? I'm not trying to argue anything, I just thought it would be funny if that post was about wanting to gently caress tanks instead. Jamfrost posted:All we need is to give each other a little Elven Love: http://store.steampowered.com/app/798590/Elven_Love/ Why do all these lovely porn games have the same bad models?
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Mar 17, 2018 12:00
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Usually when I ask people in a thread to drop a topic they're reasonable and that's that. It wasn't the case this time. From now on anybody who comes back to the lovely anime VN derail will eat a bigger probation. This is a lightweight PYF-style thread about laughing at bad games, there are threads on SA where you can write walls of text fighting about anime VNs all night long, go there and preferably don't come back. Palpek fucked around with this message at 12:56 on Mar 17, 2018 |
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Mar 17, 2018 12:46
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Nothing too horrible today, just a pair of games that decided that when people complained about games being brown and gray...they should double-down on the brown.  "Ah yes, these are the screenshots that will sell my game." And a bonus: I was wondering why this game wanted my birthdate, and... oh. 
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Mar 17, 2018 13:10
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StrixNebulosa posted:Let's leave this discussion behind and start a new one: do any of these games deserve to be here? Why or why not?
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Mar 17, 2018 13:16
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RPG Maker and VN Maker are on sale with a free weekend, which I'm sure will be a huge boon for the thread in weeks to come.
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Mar 17, 2018 13:21
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Palpek posted:I like something about this one but the UI ruins it. Whenever I buy it - because oh yes, I want to play it - I'll write up a trip report, see if there's anything worthwhile in there. It won't be anytime soon though, I'm busy with another terrible game: Precursors.   It's an incredibly janky FPS/RPG with a, um, it's got a translation alright, and all of the voices are in Russian. Except in cutscenes, where you get the worst/best English dub I've ever heard. I was watching this LP/review of it and knew I had to try it myself. The shooting is...almost compelling? It has a weird slow-paced style I'm not used to, and it's just so weird I can't help but be charmed.
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Mar 17, 2018 13:22
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Precursors is fascinatingly janky. I mean, it's a bad game, but what they were going for was neato.
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Mar 17, 2018 13:55
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kirbysuperstar posted:Precursors is fascinatingly janky. I mean, it's a bad game, but what they were going for was neato. It reminds me of a bastard child of Mass Effect and Pathologic so far, which is - well, it's been neat to contrast it against the other shooty game I've been playing, Just Cause 2. JC2 has the depth of a puddle, and the world is essentially empty, just you and the set dressing as you zoom around and destroy/find things, and it's - it's fun! It's good! But it's so empty and lifeless that it can be wearying to play at times. Then I hop over to Precursors and so far this desert planet is just full of people and strange things. It's a corrupt terrible place, but it's human, and that draws me in. ...also, if I want to be really controversial: I played Mass Effect 1 twice and it did not feel like a real place. It felt almost as lifeless as JC2. Not quite that bad, but I never got the sense that these were...people, who lived in a sensible place, etc. Like, you're made to run around the Citadel and it's a neat place, but it's so clearly artificial? I dunno, the scrumminess and terrible urban planning so far in Precursors makes my suspension of disbelief kick in more than Mass Effect's polish/writing did.
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Mar 17, 2018 14:19
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StrixNebulosa posted:Nothing too horrible today, just a pair of games that decided that when people complained about games being brown and gray...they should double-down on the brown. I've never played it myself, but I thought Flotilla is supposed to be pretty good, mechanically? I agree that art style is pretty poo poo, though.
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Mar 17, 2018 15:18
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Keeshhound posted:I've never played it myself, but I thought Flotilla is supposed to be pretty good, mechanically? I agree that art style is pretty poo poo, though. Flotilla is pretty good mechanically, yeah, but the conceit driving the plot gave an annoyingly hard time limit that I was never able to figure out how to get past. Edit: Said conceit being you are dying of space cancer, so it's time for one last adventure! Unfortunately the time limit being what it was I was never able to get even close to the end of the thing (presuming there was a proper end, anyway) MShadowy fucked around with this message at 15:35 on Mar 17, 2018 |
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Mar 17, 2018 15:28
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Flotilla was underwhelming but it does not belong in this thread.    It was a bizarre proto-FTL run-based game with Homeworld-style movement and pausable real-time combat.It wasn't great, but it was silly and fun. From the guys that make that kind of game.
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Mar 17, 2018 16:27
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It also came out years and years ago and is not part of the current sewage flood
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Mar 17, 2018 16:32
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Hemingway To Go! posted:It also came out years and years ago and is not part of the current sewage flood I try to be date agnostic when looking through my queue - it's a game in front of me now, and am I going to bother scrolling down to read about it, or will I hit next? Flotilla, alas, has a terrible visual design that I felt was mock-worthy. Dark_Swordmaster posted:Flotilla was underwhelming but it does not belong in this thread. I love being wrong about whether a game is bad, though - I don't know if I want to play Flotilla, but man. Toucans. 
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Mar 17, 2018 16:42
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The MSJ posted:Perhaps these VN makers can ease our minds by writing songs about not sexualizing minors. I think they would inadvertently write something like Jerry Lee Lewis's Great Balls of Fire, which is a cute song about sex at first, but then learn it's all about Lewis wanting to bang his 13 year old niece.
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Mar 17, 2018 18:37
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Literally every song is like that though.
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Mar 17, 2018 19:13
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OutOfPrint posted:I think they would inadvertently write something like Jerry Lee Lewis's Great Balls of Fire, which is a cute song about sex at first, but then learn it's all about Lewis wanting to bang his 13 year old niece. Jerry Lee Lewis performed Great Balls of Fire, he did not write it.
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Mar 17, 2018 19:21
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exploded mummy posted:Jerry Lee Lewis performed Great Balls of Fire, he did not write it. Sure, it was written by his biographer.
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Mar 17, 2018 19:23
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StrixNebulosa posted:Precursors *a/u
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Mar 17, 2018 19:25
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anilEhilated posted:Isn't that Xenus 3? Because these games are a classic among j*nk connoiseurs. Yup! I saw the LP/reviews for Boiling Point and White Gold and was curious but not enough to play 'em until I saw Precursors. Weird sci-fi stuff is my jam. 
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Mar 17, 2018 19:28
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Subjunctive posted:Sure, it was written by his biographer. It was written by Otis Blackwell who was an African American musician and songwriter. He was big in the Memphis scene and did work for Sun Records. He wrote a lot of Elvis's early hits.
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Mar 17, 2018 19:29
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exploded mummy posted:It was written by Otis Blackwell who was an African American musician and songwriter. Right, but he was thinking of Lewis at the time.
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Mar 17, 2018 19:40
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OutOfPrint posted:I think they would inadvertently write something like Jerry Lee Lewis's Great Balls of Fire, which is a cute song about sex at first, but then learn it's all about Lewis wanting to bang his 13 year old niece. This one cool French novel I read had a bit about Joyce that said Finnegans Wake was about his shame over his repressed attraction to his young daughters so maybe it's impossible to consume any media, whether it's the dead white guy literary canon or fate/stay night e: It was Zone which mostly an atrocity history of Europe and the Serbo-Croatian war and not about child loving
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Mar 17, 2018 19:58
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I dunno that spaceship one has all the important bits (spaceships, projectiles, lines for some UI purpose) picked out in a variety of bright colors. Having the important information in high contrast (whether color or value) over a dull background is just a basic way to make visual information easily readable. Ex if you look at CAVE games a lot of them have very detailed backgrounds but they're in fairly desaturated colors and go from like a 2-8 light to dark instead of a 0-10. I'm not saying that's the dull color I'd pick in the dev's shoes but I don't think it warrants comparison to the big wave of brown and grey criticism where most of the included games wouldn't have any of the colors the ships are in and also I think was as much a criticism of homogenous modern military/near future/ruined urban settings with no color in them.
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Mar 17, 2018 20:10
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OutOfPrint posted:I think they would inadvertently write something like Jerry Lee Lewis's Great Balls of Fire, which is a cute song about sex at first, but then learn it's all about Lewis wanting to bang his 13 year old niece. The song isn't about her at all, but he DID marry his 13-year-old cousin.
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Mar 17, 2018 22:44
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can we just stop talking about sex with underaged people I want to post a terrible steam game, but I went to steam and everything either looked incredibly generic or like the sort of thing that would only make this derail worse
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Mar 18, 2018 23:53
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hexwren posted:I want to post a terrible steam game, but I went to steam and everything either looked incredibly generic or like the sort of thing that would only make this derail worse To find terrible games that suit this thread, go to your queue and hit next until you spot something. Make a new queue whenever you run out. With this method, you too can enjoy the miles of garbage Steam has in it (and you can find actually interesting looking stuff, too!)   
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Mar 19, 2018 00:14
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What the gently caress is it with all these bad games themed specifically around poop Like, is it a glimmer of self-awareness? Are they made by literal 12-year-olds? Or maybe just dudes with the minds of 12-year-olds?
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Mar 19, 2018 00:22
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megane posted:What the gently caress is it with all these bad games themed specifically around poop Have you ever played games on Newsgrounds? That's basically what we're looking at on Steam - an unholy amalgamation of an actually good storefront, an appstore, and Newsgrounds/Kongregate/Armor games. Which is to say, yes!
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Mar 19, 2018 00:25
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Elections Simulator 2018quote:Are you under the age of 18? You do not have 18? You do not vote simply because you are too lazy? You can do this in the Simulator 2018 Election!    A depressing horrifically dirty gym? Lit like a cheap horror flick and completely empty? This is too real.
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Mar 19, 2018 00:36
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megane posted:Or maybe just dudes with the minds of 12-year-olds? Digital Homicide used to make one, so yes.
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Mar 19, 2018 03:05
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Crazzers - this game is about a guy who met girls on the street, told them nice words and drove to the hotel for closer communication. The goal of the game is to bring as many girls to the hotel in 10 minutes. This can be done only if the girls are in a very good mood, but that would raise their spirits required to tell them nice phrases and not to confuse with nasty phrases, otherwise the girl will be offended, will leave you alone, and she will go to home. The game will teach you a very beautiful phrases that girls like. But if you have so many "fans", then you'll need nasty phrases to "cut off"them. Game features: - You'll learn how to communicate with the right girl! - 12 pleasant and 12 nasty phrases that you will need in your life. - Beautiful girls. - Free access to the hotel.   It seems to be basically a sprite-based knockoff of that PUA game, only shittier.
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Mar 19, 2018 10:35
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When I read these hosed up game descriptions, I like to imagine it in the thickest Russian accent I can.
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Mar 19, 2018 13:13
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Tobermory posted:Crazzers - this game is about a guy who met girls on the street, told them nice words and drove to the hotel for closer communication. A good poster posted:When I read these hosed up game descriptions, I like to imagine it in the thickest Russian accent I can. The same developer that made Crazzers also made the lovely Football Russian 20!8. Football Russian 20!8 posted:What do you think, in what conditions do you play football in Russia in small towns and villages? In this game, you can enjoy the Russian atmosphere of football and punch a penalty to the intoxicated goalkeeper!
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Mar 19, 2018 14:12
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Well, poo poo, I learned a lot today. Should've figured a white guy wouldn't write a hit rock and roll original. My Steam queue last night was entirely made of Unity demos. Steam Direct was an awful, awful idea. Like banging your 13 year old cousin.
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Mar 19, 2018 16:25
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OutOfPrint posted:Well, poo poo, I learned a lot today. Should've figured a white guy wouldn't write a hit rock and roll original. But it does feature over 1000 achievements and trading cards!
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Mar 19, 2018 16:34
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Catching up with the thread from months ago but it looks like this Stranger Things knockoff got a new name just a couple days ago... I almost gave them the benefit of the doubt that it was just poorly thought out but I saw the achievements and welp.
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Mar 19, 2018 19:51
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Dunk Bot 3000 posted:Catching up with the thread from months ago but it looks like this Stranger Things knockoff got a new name just a couple days ago... I almost gave them the benefit of the doubt that it was just poorly thought out but I saw the achievements and welp.  Yikes
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Mar 19, 2018 20:22
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