Anonymous Confessions: I had an extremely weird dream that's going to become relevant

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Anonymous Confessions: I had an extremely weird dream that's going to become relevant

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PetraCore: Jul 20, 2017; 👁️🔥👁️👁️👁️BE NOT👄AFRAID👁️👁️👁️🔥👁️

You're 28 you've got a lot of time. Work on your socializing and probably in 5 years you'll be like 'hell this is better than my 20s'.

# ? Apr 12, 2018 18:20

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# ? May 11, 2024 13:54

TehRedWheelbarrow: Mar 16, 2011; Fan of Britches

420 SWAGLORD posted:

Ban anime forever.

# ? Apr 12, 2018 18:25

punk rebel ecks: Dec 11, 2010; A shitty post? This calls for a dance of deduction.

Anime is a gift from God. Anyone who disagrees is a philistine.

# ? Apr 12, 2018 19:32

TehRedWheelbarrow: Mar 16, 2011; Fan of Britches

punk rebel ecks posted:

Anime is a gift from God. Anyone who disagrees is a philistine.

:philistinetear:

# ? Apr 12, 2018 19:37

420 SWAGLORD: Apr 20, 2014; saban bajramovic

punk rebel ecks posted:

Anime is a gift from God. Anyone who disagrees is a philistine.

punk rebel ecks posted:

It works by the male pilots sitting in an upright position, with the female pilots laying on their stomachs directly in front of them in a compromising position, with their butts used as essentially steering wheels.

# ? Apr 12, 2018 19:40

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

Anime was a mistake.

# ? Apr 13, 2018 01:13

vortmax: Sep 24, 2008; In meteorology, vorticity often refers to a measurement of the spin of horizontally flowing air about a vertical axis.

Solice Kirsk posted:

Anime was a mistake.

# ? Apr 13, 2018 01:51

Caganer: Feb 15, 2018

axolotl farmer posted:

that�s really not in the spirit of �yes, and...?�

the spirit of "yes and" leads to a lot of sex my friend.

# ? Apr 13, 2018 02:30

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

quote:

This is the gore confessor from earlier, the one you ableists said "get therapy" to.

I've recently read "The Gift of Fear" and found my dating life has done a lot better. Between this and "How to Win Friends and Influence People" I am getting the sex I deserve, work that pays well, and respect from my coworkers and subordinates. Sometimes I need a little weed to relax but otherwise I'm going quite well. Sure I sometimes watch women get their heads sawed off on Ogrish, but other than that I'm perfectly normal. I've been volunteering and generally building up my social profile, so if someone crosses me and I (nonvioliently!) have to deal with them, no one would believe I could be mean. (Think Carol from Walking Dead).

Anyways, I can't post directly in the thread but if any other goons want to chime in with book suggestions I'm game.

Who knows, maybe I'm a "narcissist" like some claim, but honestly if people would give me respect and politeness they'd never have issues. I have a right to watch whatever I want in the privacy of my home.

I don't have any book recommendations, but I would like to recommend the album "Sports" by Huey Lewis and the News

the whole album has a clear, crisp sound, and a new sheen of consummate professionalism that really gives the songs a big boost

quote:

my best friends are my dogs. sometimes i feel like the loneliest person in the world. I've forgotten what it feels like to be with a woman it's been so long. i've wasted my youth in drug addiction. my dogs are cool as gently caress though. so it's not that bad. I don't know what it is, if facebook has made me hyperconscious or what about my lack of social life so I deleted that bitch. anyway, maybe i'll take up some new hobbies I like to fish. It's just hard in early recovery from heroin addiction when you've burned all the bridges of anyone who really gave a drat about you. I guess if anyone reads this, just temper the use of drugs if you're new to them, my family has no genetic predisposition to them or history of addiction, and I never thought i'd spend a decade of every day chasing the next high but I did, and I've ruined the relationship of people that mattered most, including my offspring. I'm the poster idiot of dead beat parent, drug addict, trying to rehabilitate himself and it's not easy. Everyday something will challenge you and encourage you to give up again, in some form of guilt usually about the past. anyway,

tldr don't use drugs too often and try facing adversity early rather than avoid it and let it compile

Yeah it sounds like you're taking the requisite time to work on yourself. If I were you I'd consider following the AA model of making amends with those you wronged, but take a little more time to get extra clean first

# ? Apr 14, 2018 14:09

therattle: Jul 24, 2007; Soiled Meat

loquacius posted:

I don't have any book recommendations, but I would like to recommend the album "Sports" by Huey Lewis and the News

the whole album has a clear, crisp sound, and a new sheen of consummate professionalism that really gives the songs a big boost

I�ll bet he�s having sex with some real hardbodies.

# ? Apr 14, 2018 14:33

Crab Dad: Dec 28, 2002; behold i have tempered and refined thee, but not as silver; as CRAB

�The sex I deserve...�

Lol

# ? Apr 14, 2018 15:54

Splicer: Oct 16, 2006; from hell's heart I cast at thee
🧙🐀🧹🌙🪄🐸

loquacius posted:

getting the sex I deserve

Who knows, maybe I'm a "narcissist" like some claim

"maybe"

# ? Apr 14, 2018 18:58

OutOfPrint: Apr 9, 2009; Fun Shoe

quote:

Sure I sometimes watch women get their heads sawed off on Ogrish, but other than that I'm perfectly normal.

New thread title.

# ? Apr 16, 2018 16:17

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

quote:

I believe my brother has been replaced by an imposter.

Two years ago his wife passed away suddenly and left him raising my seven year old nephew alone. Last year he met a new woman and seems to be working through his grief. The two of the surprised me with the fact they were going on a road trip of the good old USA that was expected to last six weeks and asked me to take care of my nephew. I was happy that my bro was finally moving on with his life.

When he didn't make his flight back, I was worried and contacted the British embassy over there and they contacted the California state police and other local law enforcement, but without evidence of foul play, they didn't look very hard for two missing tourists.

This was an incredible strain on my nephew who is still reeling from losing his mother, and was faced with now having lost his father as well. I delayed for as long as I could in telling him his father wasn't coming back (it had been ten weeks by this point) and what little investigation the police had done had been a dead end (my brother simply drove off into Yosemite and disappeared off the face of the earth).

The very day I had decided to tell my nephew his father wasn't coming back, my brother turned up at my front door looking fine. He and my nephew had an emotional reunion and he promised me he would explain everything about his temporary disappearance.

He has never gotten around to doing this, there's always some excuse or reason to end the conversation. He won't tell me what happened to his new partner, she seemingly hasn't returned to this country (I drove up to her house and it's now For Sale). What's more I'm noticing several strange things about my brother.

-he's wearing his wedding ring on the wrong hand, this is something he'd never do
-he had trouble recalling an inside joke from childhood, he looked puzzled when I said a phrase and didn't respond with the correct reply
-I caught him going through papers in my office late at night (I work for the government, not the army or secret intelligence or anything). When I confronted him, he told me he was looking for an old photo album. I noticed the next day that a file on construction of a new bridge project I was working on is missing)
-he's a lot colder with my nephew who hasn't picked up on it, he's just ecstatic to have his father home.
-my wife has heard him going out late at night. I decided to follow him once and he caught a late bus to the otherside of town and rang the bell on a large gated house and went inside. I couldn't follow him and didn't question him the next day, but this is seriously odd behaviour.

What happened to my brother during his mysterious disappearance? The man living with me is not my brother. I don't feel safe having my family around him.

Alternate explanation that doesn't involve Pod People: your brother's girlfriend was eaten by a bear in Yosemite or something and he's traumatized over it

Or maybe she was kidnapped by ninjas and they're blackmailing him to betray the British Crown; expect MI-6's involvement any day now

quote:

I am a 36 year old man who lives at home with my parents and my brother, but I am a doctor and just choose to stay around and help the family out. My older brother is an obese gamer goon type that hasn't done poo poo with his life. As a disclaimer this happened a long time ago.

Anyway, I have a secret life that without going into details would qualify me to moderate the SA forums. I accidentally stumbled into an obvious honeypot a while ago and started panicking. I knew they had my IP and probably a record of my downloads because I didn't use a VPN/tor (I am very cocky and thought I was covering my tracks well enough). I obviously immediately wiped every storage device I had with the illegal material on it, but that wasn't enough.

I planted some videos on my brother's PC to keep them from looking into me at all. He was an easy scapegoat and will save my parents a lot of money. The police bought it and he's in prison for a few years now (they could only get him on the possession charges).

Do I feel bad about it? Not really. I'll throw anyone and everyone under the bus if it benefits me. I mean he probably looked at the stuff too given how he looked and the fact that he never went on a single date in his life.

This reminds me vaguely of Fargo season 1

# ? Apr 16, 2018 16:25

Caganer: Feb 15, 2018

loquacius posted:

they're blackmailing him to betray the British Crown; expect MI-6's involvement any day now

mi6 is international, mi5 is domestic

# ? Apr 16, 2018 16:41

Splicer: Oct 16, 2006; from hell's heart I cast at thee
🧙🐀🧹🌙🪄🐸

loquacius posted:

Pod People

Steal his blood and get a fraternity test. I assume they're a thing. Anyone who says they're not is in on it, steal their blood too.

# ? Apr 16, 2018 17:45

punk rebel ecks: Dec 11, 2010; A shitty post? This calls for a dance of deduction.

Yeah some serious poo poo must have happened in California. It's likely that your sister in law was killed if not kidnapped.

# ? Apr 16, 2018 18:18

Faded Mars: Jul 1, 2004; It is I, his chronicler, who alone can tell thee of his saga.

loquacius posted:

Pod person.

Sorry about your Capgras Delusion, crazed goon.

# ? Apr 16, 2018 18:20

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

Caganer posted:

mi6 is international, mi5 is domestic

well yes, these were Yosemite ninjas

# ? Apr 16, 2018 18:28

McGavin: Sep 18, 2012

He's probably still your brother, just the Russians or Chinese got to him.

# ? Apr 16, 2018 21:02

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

quote:

I have gender dysphoria and I knew it from a very young age. When I was 12 I had a cousin get into reselling drugs and I had no idea about it, but he started stealing from the drug dealers. My cousin got murdered in the slums and since I was very close to him, I got very close to being executed as well. Because I looked and acted in a feminine manner I got raped instead, and one of the drug dealers liked me and decided not to kill me on the condition that I returned to them whenever they called. They threatened me and my family.

It lasted six months before they stopped bothering me, and this happened a lifetime ago, but ever since then, I feel like I live on borrowed time. I still close my eyes and see the gun aimed towards me, I still close my eyes and experience all the violence that I experienced that time and others during my childhood. I knew they would kill me, I was sure they would kill me, and over time I learned to accept it. Part of me let go. When nothing happened and it started to dawn upon me that I was alive, that I had to live, it was like I got out of shock and the pain came in all at once.

I never had a career. I whored myself because that was the only way I could cope with the pain. I ran headfirst into it, and to my dismay as I turn 30 that was really the only career I ever had. I freelanced some, worked from home at times, but I never held a job. All the real money I ever made came from selling my body, and I live off of it to this day. I couldn't finish college. I actively promoted transgender laws in my country more than a decade ago, but I never got aided by any of it. After what happened I loathed my body, I loathed my identity, I loathed everything. I loathed that I was alive because of it. Over time, I loathed that I didn't get killed.

It's been nearly 20 years now and I still see that gun. I still feel everything and every abuse. Only recently some of my scars went away. For so many years I saw so much violence and it scares me to this day. I've been under so many drugs and so many meds to keep myself less anxious. I have trouble holding my concentration for very long and have had before the meds.

I can't shrug off that feeling that I shouldn't be here. I can't shrug the self-loathing. I can't shrug that my body isn't mine. I can't shrug off that I shouldn't be here. I'm on the "lucky" side of statistics in what has been a life of miserable events, so >why< didn't I die there and then, >why?< I don't have suicidal tendencies, but I have a looming feeling that death is right there, and can happen anytime. I once read that most humans don't think about their own deaths much so as to make life more bearable. That feeling I had back then that I was gonna die, it stuck with me. It's been 20 years, and I alternate between panic attacks and stress and an acceptance of my impending death, but never unawareness of it. I feel like I'm trapped in those six months. I don't wanna die, but sometimes I wish I'd never been born at all.

Slowly I've become more recluse as I run out of energy to put up masks. My sleep cycle is a complete mess. Over my life I've been a victim of racism, sexism, but everything now feels distant to me. I've never had a pleasurable sexual experience in my life, but I had to learn to fake it. While that may have at some point been a concern, it now feels distant as well. I sometimes don't care. I sometimes care too much about things that are irrelevant. These are the ones that still connect me to reality. When I hear my ex complaining about a game she lost and how angry that gets her, I feel jealous, because when something gets me worked up and it's not a horrible flashback, I feel alive. I eventually attended art college because art and entertainment ironically ended up being the only things that connect me to reality, but I couldn't finish it. When depression strikes I can't focus, I can't really do anything. It sucks.

I've come to terms with things that I'll never have. I gave up on my sexuality long ago. After so many years around hopping from therapist to therapist, taking meds, visiting doctors, psychiatrists, psychologists, neurologists, and eventually just reading about trauma victims on my own, I came to terms with the fact I'm stuck in a horrifying loop that will probably never fully go away. At this point I very slowly pull myself towards some goals that are adapted to my reality. I try to play competitive games and put a lot of effort into them and that helps me connect with reality as well, in a way that nothing else did. It gives me energy and determination to work on art, and selling it to make money in a more regular way. I try to stay connected, to feel like despite all survivor's guilt, I should be here. I work on personal projects and that gives me a sense of connection with reality. I guess I invest in these things to extract some sort of pride, which the world has tried so hard to strip from me. I'm slowly cutting down on meds, dealing with some of the withdrawal effects, but long term I think it'll improve my life, and despite my pains I still want to try to think long term.

Well poo poo :stare:

This one's a bit above my pay grade. All I can really say is that you seem, from your last paragraph, to be getting some kind of a handle on your life, which is good, and I hope you find a groove that works for you. You know what your personal goals are, which is a pretty good start.

Puppetmaster sent in another fesh claiming to secretly be a woman but there wasn't anything else to it so whatever at this point

# ? Apr 17, 2018 17:43

Clockwerk: Apr 6, 2005

puppetmaster tame, so what

# ? Apr 17, 2018 22:34

SniperWoreConverse: Mar 20, 2010; Gun Saliva

loquacius posted:

I don't have any book recommendations, but I would like to recommend the album "Sports" by Huey Lewis and the News

the whole album has a clear, crisp sound, and a new sheen of consummate professionalism that really gives the songs a big boost

gore goon sounds like the kinda guy who should get heavy into imago sequence type stuff

# ? Apr 18, 2018 19:25

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

quote:

I purposefully obstructed the search for a serial rapist/murderer.

Like a couple other confessors, I've always loved serial killers, forensics shows, true crime, that sort of thing. I also have a bit of a temper, but through therapy I've learned to control it.

Anyways, while I would never rape or murder someone I'd have to admit it gives me a bit of a thrill reading about it. The getting-away-with-it aspect more than the violence.

Anyways, there was serial rapist operating in my area. A sketch had gone out, which was pretty generic. White guy, 20 year age range, bald or shaved head, average height. Basically a huge chunk of the populace in my area.

The police started doing "voluntary" dna swaps all over, including at DUI checkpoints, one of which I rolled through. I refused and did the youtube style "am I being detained". I could tell the police were angry and suspicious, but they did let me go.

Later that evening a couple detectives showed up at my apartment. They said that they understood I was in a hurry but I don't seem to be doing anything so I must have time now to do a swab. I refused again ("No thanks").

They ended up getting a little threatening, insinuating I may be pulled over more in the future, etc.

The next day, a marked police car was outside my apartment and followed me to work.

Anyways, long story short they followed me every time I left my apartment for a few days... during which another rape occurred... and this time, a body was found.

A police officer asked me to meet at the local police station, and I agreed (but brought an attorney).

They basically hosed up and threatened to charge me with "obstruction of justice" for refusing to consent (which is not a thing). They also stupidly repeated the insinuations they would harass me.

I was purposefully disrespectful and flippant, knowing that the reason they were acting out was one of the victims had a close connection to the department, and long story short one of the detectives grabbed me (battery) in front of my attorney.

I got a smallish settlement (six figures). Since then I've become somewhat of a professional litigant as a side gig. I'm actually considering making it my full time job. It's relatively easy to goad people... just refuse to produce a receipt, film a public location, stay silent when pulled over, etc.|

I was also smart and moved away from the police I sued, unlike Steven fuckin Avery, dumbass extraordinaire.

When you sue someone, they can't bring up the other lawsuits usually to the jury/judge, unless they're going to try to say you've lied or done something dishonest in the past. All my lawsuits were successful and fact based, so impugning someone for exercising their rights is highly frowned upon. These are not slip and falls, these are incidents that are 100% in control of the defendant.

Anyways, thought I'd share.

Interesting story I guess, I was worried at first that this was gonna turn creepy but you seem to be just kinda sleazy rather than an outright dangerous person :shrug:

Personally I'd prefer if you kept your targeted lawsuits aimed at the cops though

# ? Apr 18, 2018 19:33

otter: Jul 23, 2007; Ask me about my XCOM and controller collection

word.

Ghost Leviathan posted:

I have to wonder how much helper monkeys were ever actually a thing beyond glorified gimmick pets in a less thoughtful age.

One of my work manuals specifically cites the deductibility of income spent on procurement, training and feeding for helper monkeys as an assistant to the elderly and disabled. So who knows. In a decade of working for the government I have yet to come across a case where someone says, � hey, make sure I get my helper monkey deduction� but stranger things have happened. (Daily)

# ? Apr 18, 2018 19:56

pop fly to McGillicutty: Feb 2, 2004; A peckish little mouse!

Hey I just want to say to Pod Person Goon:

It sounds to me like your brother is a murderer and doesn't want anyone involved. Good luck sleeping!

# ? Apr 18, 2018 20:34

Kim Jong ill: Jul 28, 2010; NORTH KOREA IS ONLY KOREA.

SniperWoreConverse posted:

gore goon sounds like the kinda guy who should get heavy into imago sequence type stuff

You don't get the reference do you?

# ? Apr 18, 2018 23:48

SniperWoreConverse: Mar 20, 2010; Gun Saliva

nah guess I got puppetmastered

# ? Apr 19, 2018 07:22

Son of Man: Jan 29, 2003; by Azathoth

lawsuit goon you did nothing wrong in fact you are a patriot and hero for standing up for his/our rights

I'm not afraid to say I'm against rape but DNA checkpoints are some fascist poo poo. not to mention that running "voluntary" DNA checks on the populace is an admission on the part of the police that they aren't even bothering to conduct a real investigation

# ? Apr 19, 2018 15:53

punk rebel ecks: Dec 11, 2010; A shitty post? This calls for a dance of deduction.

Lawsuit goon was cool and good until he decided to make a living off gaming the system.

# ? Apr 19, 2018 17:01

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

I mostly just didn't like the part where he provoked people who weren't cops into doing things he could sue them over

# ? Apr 19, 2018 17:06

SpazmasterX: Jul 13, 2006; Wrong about everything XIV related
~fartz~

punk rebel ecks posted:

Lawsuit goon was cool and good until he decided to make a living off gaming the system.

Is it gaming the system really if all the other person has to do is not break the law?

# ? Apr 19, 2018 17:18

blarzgh: Apr 14, 2009; SNITCHIN' RANDY; Grimey Drawer

Lawsuit goon is a goddamn weirdo and a douche, but also not wrong about refusing to give DNA or suing for getting his rear end kicked. "No refusal weekend" and "DNA sweeps" are ridiculous fascist bullshit, but also cops should be allowed to lie to suspects about anything outside of Miranda, but should not be allowed to kick people's asses and if you're so emotionally invested in a case then you're probably compromised to the point that you're not doing your job effectively.

HE"S NOT THE HERO THIS THREAD DESERVES

# ? Apr 19, 2018 17:25

punk rebel ecks: Dec 11, 2010; A shitty post? This calls for a dance of deduction.

SpazmasterX posted:

Is it gaming the system really if all the other person has to do is not break the law?

You can get anyone to break the law if you push them hard enough.

# ? Apr 19, 2018 17:43

yeah I eat ass: Mar 14, 2005; only people who enjoy my posting can replace this avatar

I don't really mind DNA sweeps assuming they ONLY use it to test for that one specific case and nothing else. Maybe it is that way, I don't know.

That doesn't mean that confessor was wrong with exercising his rights though. The way he wrote makes it seem like he was needlessly confrontational and agitated them because that's what the guys on youtube do, but being a dick isn't a crime.

All that said, I don't believe it actually happened the way he said it did. A lot of cops are stupid but not THAT stupid. From my extensive viewing of law & order, there's no way they'd devote that amount of money/time surveilling a dick from a DUI checkpoint. also he seemed to not only find a criminal attorney but also one to sue the department pretty fast.

# ? Apr 19, 2018 17:57

kalel: Jun 19, 2012

Moonlight goon, good on you for making your way to a better place. It's a long journey but a worthwhile one. All my love.

# ? Apr 19, 2018 17:59

Sagebrush: Feb 26, 2012

yeah I eat rear end posted:

I don't really mind DNA sweeps assuming they ONLY use it to test for that one specific case and nothing else. Maybe it is that way, I don't know.

don't worry, if there's one thing that the police are good at, it's respecting boundaries and not overstepping their authohahahahhahahahhahaaahahhahahahhahhahahahahhaaa

# ? Apr 19, 2018 18:57

blarzgh: Apr 14, 2009; SNITCHIN' RANDY; Grimey Drawer

yeah I eat rear end posted:

All that said, I don't believe it actually happened the way he said it did. A lot of cops are stupid but not THAT stupid. From my extensive viewing of law & order, there's no way they'd devote that amount of money/time surveilling a dick from a DUI checkpoint. also he seemed to not only find a criminal attorney but also one to sue the department pretty fast.

Asking someone for their DNA is basically a pop quiz to the citizen on their rights. If you fail the quiz, its kinda on you for not knowing.

I'll see your Law & Order experience, and raise you the book "Mindhunter" which details the FBI's involvement in tons of cases of profiling and tracking down serial killers all throughout local jurisdictions, and I want to say one locality actually did a big DNA sweep in one case, but regardless its totally believable.

# ? Apr 19, 2018 19:10

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

Took the weekend off, but I return, with content

quote:

My sharing begins this past summer, in July of 2017. I�d been living with my roomates for five months, and we had been friends for another fiveish months before that. They were a couple. N, the dude, and T the girl. At this time, I held them in contempt because she was a bully and he didn�t have the spine to stand up to her. I described her to myself as �Having a mind as small as her heart.� Our evening consisted of silence, more or less.

So, go forward a month, and I try methamphetamine. One small line, and 2 hits from a pipe. In the effect of the drug my thinking about them switches up, and I start wanting to be friends with them again. In the case of T, I wanted to be more than friends. I saw how one sided their relationship was, I decided I didn�t mind trying to break it apart.

It started with looks. I�d make eye contact with her, and hold if for a significant period of time. This is in addition to my opening up to them again in friendship. This continues for about a week or two. One night, I come home exceptionally late (around 3:00 am) and they�ve locked the chain lock on the door. The noise wakes them up. They argue with each other, as I shower. I go into the living room and T is there. We talk outside for a bit as she tells me her problems. How�s she�s still afraid of the dark, and N refuses to comfort her over something that�s irrational, etc. Eventually, she turns it around on me, and asks me how my life is. Am I talking to any ladies? I work up my nerve, and tell her that I�ve become interested in her, and that she should drop the zero and get with the hero. She�s flattered, but she loves N. She leaves the door open for me to continue my attentions, though.

Over the next two weeks, we become close. We share secrets. Mine consist mainly of sad sack stories concerning my hellish love life. Hers are more varied, and include her failed attempts to become a stripper, and the two times she smuggled humans past a check point.

During this time, I also begin rubbing and kissing her feet. Before the first time, I tell her explicitly that this is sexual for me as I am attracted to her feet. She okays it. Often, my hands and lips wonder away from her feet, onto her legs, arm, belly, and neck. She never touches me, I only touch her. She always tells me to stop eventually. I always respond with �Do you Really want me to stop?�, as she is obviously aroused at this point. She always says yes, that she wants me to stop, and that we need to think of N.

This continues until the second week of October. She�s helping me print some papers in color for work, and N is already out of the house, in class. I�m playing with her, after having smoked marijuana, as is my custom in the morning. I tell her �T, there�s something in your bathroom that I have to show you.� She leads me to their bathroom, and turns around to look at me with what I interpret as expectation/desire. So, I pick her up and place her on the counter before continuing to kiss and touch her body. I go farther than ever before, and I touch her vagina. She vocalizes for a bit, mixed in with �stop�s. Her mouth is parted, but she doesn�t return my kisses or open her mouth wider. She doesn�t try to close her legs. I could have spent all day there, but I had to go to work.

I return from work, and we have a sit down. As we talk, we smoke more marijuana, again as is our custom (out of my stash, of course). She tells me that we went too far, and we have to stop. I make my argument with my hands and mouth. She gets up, and walks away from me. I follow her. This turns into me chasing her around the house. I�m reminded of playing keep away with my first girlfriend. At one point, I grab her, and throw her onto my bed. Quick as spit, she worms away from me, and out of the room. I catch her again, and put her on the couch. She doesn�t worm away, but she does tell me to stop, as she always had before. I ask her, like I always had before, �Do you really want me to stop?� Only, instead of giving her usual answer of �Yes, stop.�, she bites her lip and looks up, baring her neck to me. So, I go for it. I kiss and nibble, and touch. She moves around on the couch, but doesn�t get up again. She says �Don�t take off my pants�, so I don�t. After a bit she says �don�t take off my panties�. Well, I think to myself, why would that be an issue if I don�t take off her pants? So, I take off her pants (this I feel bad about). When I do, she says �That�s not what I meant�. Eventually her panties come off too. During this time, she�s been whispering �stop�, and I stopped 3 more times to ask her if she wanted me to stop or continue. Each time, she was completely silent. I am very careful not to pin her down.

So, she�s naked below the waist, and I begin to perform oral sex on her. After some time, I�m also naked below the waste. She won�t touch me, but I�m rubbing up against her, and I say �T, tell me that you don�t want to get hosed� and she says �I don�t want to get hosed�. I back off. We separate, and she goes to pick up N from class.

The next day, she and I are getting groceries (I think), and when we�re driving back, she says �If you had left evidence in me, I would have gone to the police�. I find this to be unnerving, but it makes sense. She was, after all, very clear that she didn�t want that. Mixed in with this, is jokes about the size of my penis, and her telling me that at least I�m good at arousing her. The next day, she grabs me by the throat, and asks if I told N, because he was acting �weird�. I told her no, and that was that. I try to continue my affections, but she tells me that it makes her feel gross and scummy, and tells me a story about how she had a reputation in highschool, and that she didn�t want to have sex with N when they first started talking but that she was on xanax, and so on. I back off.

Two weeks later, it�s Halloween. We continue to be friends, texting often. On Halloween, she helps me make my costume by drawing Asian lettering on one arm, and a tribal armband on the other (I was Chad). We also take two pictures embracing, using her phone. While at the bar, I take a shot out of her top (She was Laura Croft). Later in the night, she says that it made N angry, and he assured her he would say something but he never did. He did, however, prevent me from taking a shot from her bottom. A few days later, I�m hanging out with a different friend, and she texts me the pictures, telling me �I know you�d want to show these to R�.

Two weeks later, it�s my birthday. While driving back home from R�s house (1 block!) the cops stop us, and see my birthday weed in my pocket. I go to jail. T is the one who bailed me out, and it was R and T who went at two in the morning to pick me up from county. When I get out, we have a big hug, and she tells me how worried she was, and we laugh about my mug shot, etc.

I don�t remember if it was before or after this, but one day she, in a playful manner, says �what if I tell people you sexually assaulted me�. This puts me on the spot. I have to answer back playfully, but in a way that leaves no doubt that I don�t want her to continue this line of thought. I didn�t have much time to think, so I say something that I�m ashamed of. I said �https://www.no-onewillbelieveyou.com

It�s two weeks after my arrest, and we try to have a date, but N gets out of class early. The dinners she�s cooking include me in them. I don�t appreciate it enough (legitimately, I should have appreciated it more) and we start arguing. And Arguing. And arguing. One day, it gets pretty bad, and N takes my side, telling her that she often targets me and that he finds it annoying. She gets deathly quiet, and I go to sit down to await my mother, as we had a lunch date. Before I go, she slips me a note that just says �SEXUAL ASSAULT�. We text as I�m with my mother, and the next day, we talk.

She seems really upset, and goes on about how she�s had to carry this secret around with her for months, and that she had to drop her classes, and that she couldn�t say no to my advances because they depended on my rent money, and I belittled her when she tried to talk to me about it, and on and on. At this point, I believe her. When woman you care about comes to you in distress and tells you that you caused it, it�s hard not to believe her. So, I�m like a whipped dog. I�m so sorry, it will stop, sure you can get the third cat, etc. She wants me to tell N what happened. I tell her to let old bones lie, and that I really Really didn�t want to, but that if she was adamant, I would. She says that she�ll tell him.

Well, she told him Something, but it wasn�t the truth. We argued about a month later, and he was like �I know what happened between you and T, and I don�t care. It�s about how you�re a lovely roommate�.�. So, he got told some kinda story. By the time I move out at the end of Feb. she�s told him another story, this one closer to the truth. She told him that I sexually assaulted her. She also told our neighbor, and are mutual friends. At this point, I think about how she was during and after the event, and I no longer believe it was an assault.
And that�s where I�m at. I wish that she would go to the cops, because then I�d be able to defend myself in court. I�ve determined that she hasn�t told people in my professional life, as far as I can tell. I don�t have a twitter, but I�m trying to see if she put my name on #metoo.

Of the people I�ve told, they�re almost on my side, including the women. The one who's not is her good friend from highschool. One even suggested that I try and sue her first, for blackmailing me. This poo poo is hanging over my head like a sword, and I just want to confront it already. I�m confident of my ability to survive in court, but outside of it, it�s her word vs mine, and that will damage me severely, regardless of who comes out �on top�. What if I win an award in my field, or try to run for office? She just has to say those two words. If I find she�s slandered me on twitter, I want to sue her for defamation. I would go to the cops, but what would I say? "My former friend is privately accusing me of sexually assaulting her, but I don't think I did?" Why would a cop care if she's not formally accusing me?

What�s your interpretation of this?

My interpretation of it is that you made this decision that you wanted to target your roommate's girlfriend while you were high on meth, and ignored a whole bunch of red flags that you should stop, and kept going anyway because their relationship was lovely to begin with, as though this were a justification for any action on your part other than telling him you think their relationship is lovely and they should break up. I know that you don't feel what you did is sexual assault, but if she did take it to court, and you told them what you told us, it would fit the definition, and you would be in trouble. My advice to you is to apologize to everyone involved, as sincerely as you can make it sound.

quote:

I'm one of the guys in charge of looking for asteroids at NASA. I get the feeling that there isn't much oversight so I decided to run a test.

A few years back, I discovered an upcoming near miss event and never reported it. I never heard anything about it from my supervisors so I just spend my workday browsing the forums or looking through the digital archives for top-secret alien poo poo or whatever else. 99% of it is pretty boring but it's cool just reading about the early days when NASA was sending people to the moon.

Long story short I still flag a few asteroids every month for review but can't be bothered to spend my days looking for things that have a .0000001 percent chance of happening. What are we going to do if a asteroid hits us anyway? Nuke it? Hit it with a puny satellite? I figure we have a better chance of destroying ourselves as a civilization so why bother?

PS you know how every once in a while you hear about asteroids that will have a chance of hitting the earth 1000+ years from now? That's me too. Media eats that poo poo up.

Remember when someone sent in a fesh claiming that a giant meteor would hit the Earth in like two weeks' time or something

That was a fun time

# ? Apr 23, 2018 15:14

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# ? May 11, 2024 13:54

MarcusSA: Sep 23, 2007

Meth is one hell of a drug.

Also I know we hate to call fake but some of that seems like it was typed 1 handed.

If not then well... don�t do meth!

# ? Apr 23, 2018 15:30

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Anonymous Confessions: I had an extremely weird dream that's going to become relevant

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