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Neddy Seagoon posted:Elves aren't guests. They're more of a nuisance that are tolerated so long as they bring booze to trade. The goblin in question was described as visiting, which means that rules of hospitality should have been applied. Had it been trespassing, the rules would been forfeited and the miscreant could been disposed off without acting like no good elves. The rules of law is what separates us from elves. And beards of course. Our craftsmanship. And booze. Mining. Cheese making. Disdain of trees. Brutal honesty. Zero tolerance of prancing. And all other qualities that separates dwarf from elf. But mostly the rules of law.
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Apr 10, 2018 23:20
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New migrants arrived today. As they might not know how things work around here, I gave them a tour. I took them straight to the just finished barracks. This is the mettle testing zone. Put this metal on and go test it for two months every year. I assigned them all on the spot to the Reserves.  Facebook Aunt gave birth. Another potential legendary warrior.  I noticed DivineCoffeeBinge withdrawing herself from society. I know what this means. So I followed her to see what workshop she will choose. Please make a legendary battleaxe! She claimed a Carpenter's Workshop. Oh. OK, who cares.  Word must have spread about our mighty strength! A traveling band of warriors, vagabonds, mercenaries, and other souls of war have arrived.  Autumn has arrived. I told everybody it was now Infrastructure Season!  I found everything working so well that I spent my free time improving the home of my warriors. I increased the capacity of the storage areas. I also decided to deal with the vomit problem. Not because of the smell or sight or amount of it, but because of the inefficiency of it all. Good food was being wasted and combat potential was badly affected. I stood in the central area of the fortress, looked at redneck nazgul, pointed straight up and said, "start digging".  It's been almost 3 months and all of the metal I wanted melted was unmelted! I ordered more magma smelters and forges. Some of the leaders around here wondered if my position gave me power to make such demands. I spent a day following them around, telling them about all of the dangerous horrors that live outside and want to get inside. They finally did it, but it was too much hassle. Later, when I needed to temporarily increase our leather output, I built them in the barracks.   I have heard some rumors about our treatment of the goblin visitor. It was inevitable. "All the greatest dwarves commit Actions." "The world explains injust balance." The dwarves came to trade today, 15th of Limestone, 567. Great men of knowledge and wisdom. I better see shiny things when they unload.   Very good trading. Those old smelters and leather shops were a bottleneck. Not any more! Later that day, once the melting began in earnest, Corbeau came to see me. He was very concerned with his masterworks being melted. I told him that his trinkets would not protect the fortress. Before he saves them, he should first save himself. In other news, Zebrin was doing a good job as the mayor and the lands around Olileshom became a duchy.    Even more migrants arrived. Perfect, I gave them pickaxes, chisels, needles, hammers, and told them to get to work. Must be done before winter! And goodbye, brave dwarves. Pay respects to the "indomitable spirit" of Yeol on your way out.  After a few days, I noticed nobody on Leather work duties. I found mojangles and a few civilians not working so I put them to work! It has been months since I last heard from my parents. I only sent them on a week long mission. Perhaps I should send a squad out to investigate. The squad tombs are coming along great. The rest will require more work to be done. Something to keep me busy during winter. The central tomb of each chamber is made of silver and is for the commander. The soldiers all surround the commander, guarding them even in death. The large area to the south will be for statues of these great warriors and their heroic deeds. And, of course, my tomb as well.   The skylight shaft was finally finished after a month. I knew it was finished when I could smell the vomit from the barracks. However, I was informed that we lacked the sand and glass to properly seal it. And the temperature has been getting colder for weeks now. I made that a priority, sending strong soldiers up and down the mountain to fetch sand.  Winter is upon us!  Some portions transcribed by Tunicate as dictated by Lpzie.
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Apr 11, 2018 02:57
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It took me a few seconds to realize we had a diagonal skylight.
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Apr 11, 2018 03:13
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chitoryu12 posted:It took me a few seconds to realize we had a diagonal skylight. Truly the creativity of children is wonderous.
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Apr 11, 2018 03:16
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chitoryu12 posted:It took me a few seconds to realize we had a diagonal skylight. No, thats just how steep the mountain is. (In other news I think ZDR has finally un-un-fixed the forums dealing with large posts and I can finally update the list)
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Apr 11, 2018 06:20
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sadly df light only travels straight down, never diagonally i suppose this means that the sun is always straight overhead and it simply doesn't shine during the night
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Apr 11, 2018 12:22
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Diary of the Dwarf Foul Ole Ron. (no date) Entry 1 I don't know what to say, I lost me gods dammed old diary on the way to this zuffiing place and since then everything is just out of me control or so it seems. Pages of memories that I am already finding hard to re-call, gods dammed head of mine. I can remember working with in the smithy back home, I remember the accident, but thankfully not the pain. I remember waking up to me parents dead. I also woke up to some mad dwarf who called himself a head thinkerer saying I was lucky to survive. Yeah lucky. Stuck in a flaming mountain as a spear dwarf under some madcap infant general. Lucky enough that part of me brains dead... the head thinkerer called it something... what even was his name again? Gasto? Grafter? Anyways I can't even write down how I got here or why I am here. Funny thing is I seem to able to remember things while I am here, but the past tis murky. Im a bloody shade of meself. Still the medicine I have seems to be ample and the note attached seems to say a small drop in me beer, so least I can keep the headaches at bay. This place is bloody odd though, not like the lands i remember. Certainly no zuffin reanimating ..well ... EVERYTHING!... or so i think. not so sure anymore. Valleysilences, what a gods dam mess of a place... tis funny, thought I recognized the name, like an old memory from long ago.... meh, time to drink!
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Apr 11, 2018 15:51
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Prav posted:sadly df light only travels straight down, never diagonally Maybe the DF sun is stationary dead overhead and "night" is simply some other celestial body passing in the way and obscuring it.
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Apr 11, 2018 17:46
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quote:The Last Questions: The First Answers Local medical dwarf doesn't even worship either of our two murdergods, but does still pray to Doren, the "come and murder me if you can" god. Clearly, the squad's question and answer are the same thing: The goal of all life is death.
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Apr 11, 2018 20:53
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StrangeAeon posted:Local medical dwarf doesn't even worship either of our two murdergods, but does still pray to Doren, the "come and murder me if you can" god. ...and sandwiches.
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Apr 11, 2018 21:01
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PurpleXVI posted:Maybe the DF sun is stationary dead overhead and "night" is simply some other celestial body passing in the way and obscuring it.
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Apr 12, 2018 00:51
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Lpzie posted:The squad tombs are coming along great. The rest will require more work to be done. Something to keep me busy during winter. The central tomb of each chamber is made of silver and is for the commander. The soldiers all surround the commander, guarding them even in death. The large area to the south will be for statues of these great warriors and their heroic deeds. And, of course, my tomb as well. Diary of Osroct, Commander of The Large Metals You know, when Boss Baby first told me we wouldn't be replacing lost members of our squads, I had my doubts. I was sure that the smaller unit sizes would result in far greater casualties as we slowly became less and less capable of fending off both goblin horde and innumerable undead. And I am right. But knowing I have a silver sarcophagus waiting for me at the end of it kinda takes away the sting from that. I ride to Geshud shiny and
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Apr 12, 2018 05:01
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A very slow winter. "Idleness leads to defileness." The barracks are officially complete. Each squad as their own training area, place to store equipment, and beds. All is well. New squads should only be created when a previous one is completely destroyed. Their training area, beds, equipment may be given to the new squad.  After not hearing back from my parents for many months, I sent a squad to investigate. As to not attract attention, I sent The Large Metals. Their bulging muscles and puffy ears will not give them away. It was sometime later that I received word that my parents were being held prisoners. That's not what I planned for them at all -- I could have done that here if I wanted. No, they must be free to wander the earth until they die of old age! I may have to order a rescue mission. Something to think about in the Spring.  The world is a dangerous place. Us dwarves are at war with the elves, one particular group of humans, and the goblins. We are only peaceful with the other group of humans (for now). We must remain strong and smart, slow to anger yet swift to completely annihilate.  It came to my attention that the fisherdwarves were unable to catch fish. They said the fish were acting strange. Later they refused to fish in the underground area. With the surface swamps frozen, and fish being my favorite dish, I had to solve this problem. After a day down there, I heard some distant flapping and sliding and growling. A large creature, for sure. I assigned The Helmed Spears and The Rough Toes to guard the area. After two weeks without incident, I sent 2 soldiers there and let the rest return to training. Things were back to normal for now.  With the patrols set up, I removed the indoors restriction. Dwarves were free to go anywhere they wanted. The military response time has been improved to 1 day. Any self-respecting dwarf should be able to survive a day before help arrives. Spring as arrived. The skylight is almost done. A few more green glass blocks, which are still being made. The squad tombs are almost done as well. A few more coffins, a few more assignments. The rooms should be fully engraved only after the squad members are all resting in their coffins. Statues of each of the commanders have been ordered. They are to be placed around my tomb. Something should also be done about all the stone in the fortress. It is getting in the way! The vomit should probably be cleaned at some point. And hopefully The Large Metals come back soon, although I fear they suffer the same fate as my parents. Unacceptable! How dare the humans keep my soldiers from their training schedule? More experienced soldiers will have to be sent.    As for me, I will continue training these dabbling axedwarves. They may not seem like much now, but one day they will conquer all that the eye can see. As the great books say, "the practical impracticality of whimsical folly self-destructs civilizations". Some portions transcribed by Tunicate as dictated by Lpzie.
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Apr 12, 2018 23:24
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Journal of Gnoman, Tyrant This vessel seems to be annoyingly concerned with the proper cartography of this city, and failing to demonstrate this obsession would draw suspicion. I have badgered one of the scholars into producing an updated map. http://mkv25.net/dfma/map-12796-valleysilences
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Apr 13, 2018 00:15
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Huh. I am really old. Like, if I don't get killed, there is actually a fairly decent chance of me dying of old age. Dwarves live to 150 right? Well, better death in battle then that slow indignity. The fact that I am leading a group of dwarves in a squad called the Hell's Bells is pretty cool too. Here is to hoping my old dude gets to kill a lot of poo poo before he gets killed and thrown into the volcano! Also mayor. What?
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Apr 13, 2018 07:22
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Zebrin posted:Also mayor. What? Whoever has the most friends gets elected mayor, so you must have lots of friends! That means lots of people will be upset when you die.
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Apr 13, 2018 11:02
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From the Journal of Oddom "DivineCoffeeBinge" Mersethzulban, Chef, Legendary Carpenter, Jeweler, Fortress Founder Is it considered bad form to call yourself a Legendary Carpenter? Everyone assures me I am. I made a grate. I have a confession to make, journal. I wasn't even planning on making the item that now bears the proud title of Doren Tudrug. I was thinking about grated cheese, see. But, well, one thing led to another and suddenly it's all "Oh DivineCoffeeBinge no one cuts tree corpses into interesting shapes like you do!" So that was a thing that happened. D'you think it makes life here any easier? Like hell it does; our Overseer is a literal child who has apparently decided that almost all of us are in the army now. I ducked out of that little detail, thankfully, but the place is a veritable military encampment all of a sudden. And people keep showing up! How long do you think it's going to take for some knife-ear to be all "it was bad enough they walled up our buddies and drowned them in lava or whatever the hell else it is they did, but now they're amassing great numbers and a huge army we have to destroy them before they destroy us"?!? Oh, but it's okay, because Overseer Toddler read some books. The kid can't tie his own bootlaces and misses the toilet half the time but he claims to be reading books and everyone's all "oh, okay then" and no one even bothers to ask "wait what's this book nonsense why aren't you learning by reading the engraved surfaces of the dining hall like a good dwarf should" no it's books this, books that. Don't worry, guys, we've got a military genius running things, let's hope he doesn't misplace his binkie and have to sit in time-out for the rest of the invasion! We know the mountain is cursed, what with the whole 'dead things rising and trying to murder us' bit, but we all stick around anyways. Maybe that's part of the curse. Or maybe I'm as much a hooplehead as the rest of 'em. This is a seriously sweet grate, though. If I ever have kids I'll pass it down to them. Better grates than books.
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Apr 13, 2018 11:33
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Dwarf me please. Engraver or military preferably but I'll take whatever comes up. Happy to see another one of these.
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Apr 13, 2018 13:31
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Boski, please report to the Discord.
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Apr 14, 2018 23:30
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Can undead goats fall down and smash the glass ceiling if they have enough momentum?
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Apr 15, 2018 21:14
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Rincewinds posted:Can undead goats fall down and smash the glass ceiling if they have enough momentum? No, constructions are currently immune to that sort of damage. You could build a floor out of bars of soap and fill the room with lava and falling goats and everything will be fine.
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Apr 15, 2018 22:51
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would dwarves freak out if they walked under a glass roof covered in reanimated goat-bits?
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Apr 15, 2018 23:46
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Nope. As far as the game's concerned, glass constructions are opaque. The one exception to this is windows.
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Apr 16, 2018 00:16
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Prav posted:would dwarves freak out if they walked under a glass roof covered in reanimated goat-bits? No, glass constructions are the same as any other constructions and not actually transparent in the game mechanics. You could build the roof our of sandy loam and granite and it would have the same effect, because the way sunlight works is if a square is exposed to sunlight once, it is henceforth considered to be lit by the sun forever. People tend to use glass for more role playing purposes, and to make the sunlight mechanics less nonsensical.
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Apr 16, 2018 00:17
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What does the skylight expose to the sun?
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Apr 16, 2018 04:31
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the large intersection on the main floor, where a lot of dwarves pass through to go outside, or reach the trade depot, or use some of the workshops, or the barracks.
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Apr 16, 2018 10:12
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counterfeitsaint posted:No, glass constructions are the same as any other constructions and not actually transparent in the game mechanics. You could build the roof our of sandy loam and granite and it would have the same effect, because the way sunlight works is if a square is exposed to sunlight once, it is henceforth considered to be lit by the sun forever. People tend to use glass for more role playing purposes, and to make the sunlight mechanics less nonsensical. One day Toady will decide to more accurately model light. Unfortunately this will involved calculating the behavior of each individual photon.
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Apr 16, 2018 13:45
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raytracing, but with ascii graphics
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Apr 16, 2018 14:09
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The light ray strikes the fisherdwarf in the third toe, right foot, but the light is deflected by her +octopus leather high boot+!
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Apr 16, 2018 14:48
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Lpzie posted:the large intersection on the main floor, where a lot of dwarves pass through to go outside, or reach the trade depot, or use some of the workshops, or the barracks. The future vomitorium, in other words.
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Apr 16, 2018 15:23
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megane posted:The light ray strikes the fisherdwarf in the third toe, right foot, but the light is deflected by her +octopus leather high boot+!
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Apr 16, 2018 16:56
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The photon hits the =crystalline silicon plate= in the first electron, 3p orbital, and the severed part sails off along a line! The =crystalline silicon plate= devours the photon. The electron slams into the electrode.
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Apr 16, 2018 18:50
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a 1.2 eV photon hits the 5-pound *iron breastplate* (x 29,500,000,000,000,000,000,000) Urist has been found dead, dehydrated.
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Apr 16, 2018 21:44
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Ustuth prefers to drink dwarven light beer.
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Apr 16, 2018 21:59
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Dying of dehydration because you can't withstand the withering pummeling of trillions of photons also describes hangovers pretty well.
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Apr 17, 2018 04:57
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Haifisch, it might be a good idea for you to pop into the discord.. Just in case.
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Apr 17, 2018 22:07
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Yeah, uh, the update that should've been up by now obviously isn't. Hopefully it'll be up soon though. In the meantime, is there any particular thing from the Legends you want to see? If I make the next update I'll make another little lore update too to accompany it.
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Apr 17, 2018 22:12
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Are there any interesting monsters that exist in the world? Maybe some of the forgotten beasts kicking around in the caverns? Or maybe there's more to about those tortoise demons that helped bring death and murder into the world? Also please dwarf me as whatever.
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Apr 17, 2018 23:42
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crimea posted:Are there any interesting monsters that exist in the world? Maybe some of the forgotten beasts kicking around in the caverns? Or maybe there's more to about those tortoise demons that helped bring death and murder into the world? There’s almost certainly interesting forgotten beasts somewhere, I just hope that they make an appearance in our fort. I liked that one succession lp where the vampire dwarves fought that one forgotten beast that melted all their limbs, and they couldn’t die so they were stuck in the caverns forever, all melted and helpless. That was metal.
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Apr 18, 2018 04:10
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Cathode Raymond posted:I liked that one succession lp where the vampire dwarves fought that one forgotten beast that melted all their limbs, and they couldn’t die so they were stuck in the caverns forever, all melted and helpless. That was metal. Do you know the name of that succession LP? Doesn't sound like one I've read yet.
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Apr 19, 2018 16:22
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