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Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.
The upside of people that delayed and/or incoherent is that chances are if they haven't put any thought into how to communicate whatever they've said, they certainly aren't going to think about whatever you say to them in return as long as you don't try to make them think about it.

Much like my posting.

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Ouhei
Oct 23, 2008

:minnie: Cat Army :minnie:

value-brand cereal posted:

Anyways, here's some poo poo.



​My [18F] boyfriend's [22M] sister is a sociopath and I can't let her continue abusing him.Non-Romantic
submitted 1 year ago by xxRawrFacexx


https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/4lchut/my_18f_boyfriends_22m_sister_is_a_sociopath_and_i/


I don't understand the incident at all and OP doesn't give much in the comments.

She's 18, he's 22, been dating a year and a half. Totally normal and cool.

tactlessbastard
Feb 4, 2001

Godspeed, post
Fun Shoe

quote:

He knows I tell his mom everything
What the gently caress.




quote:

ve never been in a situation like this before

Yeah, that's going to keep happening for a few years


quote:

I went to my pants after we were done to pick up my wallet and she quickly grabbed me by my hand saying there is no need for that, I insisted to pay but she just smiled and told me she didn't feel like she was working, she enjoyed it herself too. Then she just kissed me on my lips and told me to be in touch with her. 

Dear Penthouse,

LadyPictureShow
Nov 18, 2005

Success!



Me (18f) old supervisor/close friend(29m) confesses feelings

quote:

So the title says it all. My supervisor (29m) and I (18f) became very close during the time we worked together as I was his second at the job we were at. He helped me through a lot of life’s crap by talking things out and I did the same for him.

About two months ago I quit working there because I started an apprenticeship for my local electrical union. Not long after, seeing as there was no longer the risk of dating me when I was one of his coworkers, he confessed that he has deep feelings for me and wants to pursue a relationship. I have feelings for him but I am unsure of all this because of the age gap.

I helped him through his divorce about a year ago and we were close before that, he’s honestly been one of my best friends so that’s another reason I’m nervous. I don’t want to ruin our relationship. I’m currently in the market for house buying so that’s my main focus at the moment. The reason I add to this is because I brought up my concerns about the age difference with him and his reasoning is that I’m more mature for my age, although he recognizes that there are differences and I will likely change as I get older. I graduated high school at sixteen and got an associates degree before starting the trade I’m in now so I’m not very worried about a power imbalance because I’m financially independent.

I am worried about the reactions of other people though especially my family. His best friend (who is twenty years older then him so 49m) is really happy for him because he is happier since being friends with me. His parents also love me and are aware of his interest but I am afraid of what my family will think. TL;dr old boss told me he has feelings and I do to but I’m unsure if I should go for it given the age gap.

17 year old helping a 28 year old get through his divorce... nothing weird about that...

LadyPictureShow fucked around with this message at 15:38 on Apr 30, 2018

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

I'm honestly just mad at her for being in the market to buy a house at age 18

what the gently caress :mad:

MarcusSA
Sep 23, 2007

I mean she doesn’t seem stupid so uh maybe try it? I dunno.

The way she writes it it doesn’t seem like a terrible idea to give it a try.

LadyPictureShow
Nov 18, 2005

Success!



Sorry for posting back-to-back, but yowza!


My boyfriend (20M) left me (23F) high and dry with our newborn baby.

quote:

My (ex) boyfriend (Darren) and I dated for a year, traveling around the country. We had some amazing times, but he was abusive toward me sometimes. The first/worst time, we had a minor disagreement and I was left with an injured nose and two black eyes. Another time, he chucked my guitar that had sentimental value into the river. Both times he was arrested and both times he blamed alcohol. He promised never to touch alcohol again.

The beginning of my pregnancy was great. Darren swore that he was going to step up to be the fantastic father that he never had. He talked to me about marriage, and I began envisioning my future happy little family. We moved in with my parents, he got a job. Over time, he got less nice and kind. I struggled with depression, but Darren would tell me I just needed to "not be so weak", sometimes even taunting me. He was unkind to my parents who took him in and didn't ask anything of us. I tried to talk to him about it, but the moment I tried to say anything he didn't like, he would talk over me and drown me out, telling me that anything I had to say was not worth listening to. Toward the end of my pregnancy, Darren impulsively quit his job, upsetting everyone as I was only weeks from labor and this job was willing to give him everything, even a paternity break. His world revolved around video games now.

I had a very long and traumatizing labor experience, which ended up in having to get emergency surgery. I woke up in recovery to Darren telling me how beautiful our son was and I swear we fell in love again at that moment. When we were finally able to come home, we had talks about improving our relationship, and I was hopeful, but he obsessively picked up video games again. There I was, post surgery, taking care of the baby, getting no sleep and no recovery. I was livid! I called him out on it, saying that we should definitely take turns because this poo poo was not fair. He got upset for this and lost it on me. Completely sober, he dug his nails deep into my wrists. Then, he got in my face and tried to threaten me. I was completely immobilized by fear. He told me to get up and hit my leg in an area where it hurt my stitches. I was loud and in pain and he panicked. He got the baby and started taking care of him, but next thing we know the cops are at the door. I lied for him because I didn't want him to be jailed just days after our miracle.

Darren begged me to go with him to his mom's a state over with the baby. Any other time, I might have stupidly followed him, but my son really gave me the strength to realize that I couldn't let this continue. [bI tried to calmly talk to him but all he heard was "no" and went around the house, making death threats about my dad (for calling the cops). [/bI]Seeing him react that way made me numb. I used the last of our funds to get him a bus ticket back to where I found him.

Since then, he's been posting hurtful things on social media, posting photos of him with other girls, and has his old girlfriends laugh at me online. All of this has made me emotionally and physically ill, on top of figuring out motherhood and trying to heal from my surgery. I cried myself to sleep every night and ultimately have felt like a horrible mother because of what I've been going through. Darren's mother has told me that it's probably best to block him due to his disrespect toward me on social media. I was trying to avoid that to keep things civil, seeing as he is the father to my child and I never intended to do anything to keep him out of his son's life, but I'm starting to think perhaps that's exactly what I need to do in order to start healing.

People keep telling me perhaps he'll return to us a changed man, but he honestly, desperately needs help and I know he's too stubborn to admit that. Could someone like this ever change? He's a manipulative, immature, and abusive sociopath and blames me for all of his mistakes and bad decisions. Alas, I'm trying to move forward, but goddamn it hurts. I'm thinking about starting therapy, but I desperately want him to seek help.

----

TL;DR abusive boyfriend left our newborn and I after major surgery and has been super petty and hurtful about it on social media. I'm ill and hurt and struggling to find the best course of action on whether to block him out in order to start personally healing, yet potentially keeping him from his son's life, or being a civil person and allowing him to keep communication with me seeing as he is the father of my son. (He says he wants to be a good father, but it's hard to believe him)

Yet another story where ‘blave blan blabortion’ was the answer to everything far before it got to this point.

Gave you two black eyes, chucked your guitar into a river, yeah that’s exactly the guy you want to have unprotected sex with.

E: Baby is 4 days old. Nice going.

LadyPictureShow fucked around with this message at 15:50 on Apr 30, 2018

christmas boots
Oct 15, 2012

To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out
Biscuit Hider

six no substitute posted:

Wow, I cannot believe my mom stooped so low...

My mom called my doctor and said to him "What's the most accurate measurement for weighing?" The doctor said "An underwater weighing test" And just like that, my mom said "Yes. When can my son and my daughter can take it?" and the doc said "Today at 2pm."

So, I didn't bother taking a shower and so did my sister too, so I had to get into a special swimming suit(tight pants...Ugh).
My sister said "Can I pull my hair down to a ponytail?" The doctor said "No." So my sister with her long, blonde hair went underwater with 8 seconds and had she must enjoyed it..but I didn't.

My sister had to wear pants and a bra, so she enjoyed minutes of going underwater. I didn't take a shower and she didn't too.
Before she got into the tank, you see girls 'pretend' to pull their hair into ponytails, but they don't. That's what she did.
The reason for this topic to not get too confusing is that don't you guys like to see teenage girls in a tank with their hair and their body soaked and wet? That's the reason for this topic.

You want a detailed summary of what happened today? Alright, here goes:

My mom wanted to do something instead of weighing myself on a scale. She heard about a underwater weighing test from my doctor last year and she wanted to give it a try to both, myself and my sister.

She called the doctor and wanted to schedule an appointment for my sister and I and today was the only day they could get us in. So my mom told both of us you don't need to take a shower if you don't want to(since I got up at 12pm and she got up at 12:30p.m.) It goes on from there with the underwater weighing at the doctor's office.
My sister constantly talks about her hair. "Should I wash it?" "Should I pull my hair up or leave it down?" Stuff like that. It wasn't my idea to take this underwater weighing thing.

The doctor puts you in a tank (and I didn't have a shower), makes you do certain things of breathing, and you put your head underwater for a few seconds. Not hard at all.
To answer you question, before my sister and I got into the tank, the doctor did a basic weight test then I got into the tank and did some breathing excerises to see how my lungs would be situated underwater. Then the doctor took the temperature of the water inside the tank. After I taken my underwater tests, I had to stick my head underwater for 8 seconds and it was done. 30 minutes its all it take.

Yeah that’s the stuff

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

LadyPictureShow posted:

Sorry for posting back-to-back, but yowza!


My boyfriend (20M) left me (23F) high and dry with our newborn baby.


Yet another story where ‘blave blan blabortion’ was the answer to everything far before it got to this point.

Gave you two black eyes, chucked your guitar into a river, yeah that’s exactly the guy you want to have unprotected sex with.

E: Baby is 4 days old. Nice going.

I feel like she was justified in giving him another chance when he gave up booze, but it turns out an addict is an addict

Admiral Ray
May 17, 2014

Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

LadyPictureShow posted:

Me (18f) old supervisor/close friend(29m) confesses feelings


17 year old helping a 28 year old get through his divorce... nothing weird about that...


quote:

he’s honestly been one of my best friends so that’s another reason I’m nervous.

:crow:

Veni Vidi Ameche!
Nov 2, 2017

by Fluffdaddy

LadyPictureShow posted:

Me (18f) old supervisor/close friend(29m) confesses feelings


17 year old helping a 28 year old get through his divorce... nothing weird about that...

A ten-year gap when one of the people involved is 18 is pretty ehhhhh, but they're both adults, and he is no longer her supervisor. What the hell. Give it a shot. It probably doesn't go the distance, but she didn't say anything that makes him sound completely insane.

tater_salad
Sep 15, 2007


Lesbian highschool love with a happy ending... Palate cleanser


update: (19f) falling in love with my best friend (19f) but I'm nervous about telling her.


quote:

My original post didn’t get as many replies as I had hoped, but the few pieces of advice that I did get helped me to be less nervous about doing what I had to do for my situation. And now I have an update in case anyone cares to read it (spoiler alert: it’s a happy one).

Today I hung out with Katherine (which is her real name; I called her Katelin in the op because it’s close to her name but not quite the same, but she’s fine with me using her real name in this post). It took me a few hours to mention anything related to my feelings for her, but I decided I’d start out by telling her I’m a lesbian and see how she reacted, to determine what to say next. As soon as the words “I’m a lesbian” left my mouth, Katherine smiled and said “I know, Taylor. I’ve known for years now.” We both paused for a few seconds because I was nervous about how to respond to that, but then she helped me out by asking me “any girls you’ve got your eye on right now?” and then she winked at me, as if to suggest that she knew exactly what else I wanted to tell her.

So I said “yeah...you” and she started rubbing my arm with her hand (as I mentioned in the op she always does), and after another brief pause, I directly asked her “will you be my girlfriend, Katherine?” Her response: “it’s about drat time, Tay” (which I keep reimagining in my head while smiling uncontrollably). Then we kissed a few times (I have no words for how amazing it felt to finally kiss her), and we cuddled in her bed for the rest of the time before I left her house.

I’ve never been happier in my life than I am right now. But for the time being, Katherine and I are going to keep our relationship a secret from most people we know in real life, until we can figure out the best way to come out to our parents. We’re a lot less worried about how hers will react than we are about mine, but we don’t want either of them to find out about our relationship from anyone other than us. So I could still use some more advice on how to come out to my (very conservative) parents, along with what exactly I should plan to do in case they don’t take it so well.

Tl;dr: Best friend has known about me being a lesbian for a long time, and feels the same way about me as I do about her. We’re dating now, but keeping our relationship a secret until we feel comfortable each telling our parents (which I could still use some advice for).


MarcusSA
Sep 23, 2007

Veni Vidi Ameche! posted:

A ten-year gap when one of the people involved is 18 is pretty ehhhhh, but they're both adults, and he is no longer her supervisor. What the hell. Give it a shot. It probably doesn't go the distance, but she didn't say anything that makes him sound completely insane.

Yeah that’s my thinking. It’s probably not ever going to work but neither of them sound totally insane so gently caress it.

But Rocks Hurt Head
Jun 30, 2003

by Hand Knit
Pillbug

tater_salad posted:

Lesbian highschool love with a happy ending... Palate cleanser


update: (19f) falling in love with my best friend (19f) but I'm nervous about telling her.

Awwww, I hope she gets some good advice on coming out to her folks, although given how her girlfriend reacted she might not be as closeted as she thinks

Doc Hawkins
Jun 15, 2010

Dashing? But I'm not even moving!


How do I ask classmates to stop asking me to hang out?
saying-no friendship sweden


quote:

Two classmates often phone me, asking if I want to hang out. The times I have done so, I did not enjoy myself at all. We don't seem to share any hobbies/interests.

What I have already tried (didn't work in the long run):

telling them that I am being somewhere else, and can't come (and it's true when I do)
telling them that I'm too tired (does not have to be very tired at all)
saying that I'll call later (which I usualy don't do)

I think if I continue using the beforementioned approaches, then eventually they will stop asking. But those are all indirect approaches and - even if they stop - I fear they will think of me badly. I also think it is dishonest of me using these white lies to get excused of hanging out with them.

Question: How can I ask them to stop asking me to hang out?

Goals:
- I do not want to burn any bridges, since I will still see them regularly in class.
- If it is possible without burning bridges, I would like to explain it honestly (I just don't like hanging out with them) and not rely on lies.
- I want to keep it as polite as possible
- They accept that I don't want to hang out with them, but are not mad at me.

The obvious approach is just telling them "Sorry but I don't like hanging out with you", but I fear that they will be mad at me or think that I don't like (or even hate) them - which could have negative repercussions, seeing that there already is some bullying going on in my class.
To be clear: I think they are nice people but I just don't like hanging out with them.
Additional info:

Country: Sweden
Age: 12-13
The mentioned classmates are not involved in current mobbing

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost
Hang out with your friends you snobby little bitch

Jeza
Feb 13, 2011

The cries of the dead are terrible indeed; you should try not to hear them.

Pick posted:

Hang out with your friends you snobby little bitch

what if these 'friends' are aspergers and can't read the signals that he doesn't want to be their friend


a conundrum

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost
Cure their burgs with love, as you do

tactlessbastard
Feb 4, 2001

Godspeed, post
Fun Shoe

LadyPictureShow posted:

Me (18f) old supervisor/close friend(29m) confesses feelings

. I don’t want to ruin our relationship. 

That relationship is already dead, child.

Jeza
Feb 13, 2011

The cries of the dead are terrible indeed; you should try not to hear them.

Pick posted:

Cure their burgs with love, as you do

As ships are to bergs, friendships are to 'burgs.

venus de lmao
Apr 30, 2007

Call me "pixeltits"

Why can't the Swedish tween (sween?) just say "no thanks"? I think it's nej, tack in Swedish.

La Brea Carpet
Nov 22, 2007

I have no mouth and I must post
My [21 M] girlfriend [22 F] acts like rules don't apply to her, and it makes me uncomfortable

quote:

I was brought up to always respect laws and rules, my parents are pretty strict on that kind of stuff. And even now, I’m not comfortable “bending” the rules.

My girlfriend Emma is pretty much the opposite; she told me that her dad always taught her to question authority, and question whether it is just. And her mom had grown up in poverty and had a kinda “Do what you need to get an advantage” view on life.

——

When she was applying to college, she didn’t know much math, but she had her friend take her entrance exam (edit - placement exam, not entrance exam. She had already been accepted to college) she could be placed in Physics and Calculus her first semester instead of having to take remedial classes, and having to pay way more in tuition for an extra semester. She actually managed to teach herself the Algebra skills she was lacking, and get all As her freshman classes. When she told me about this, I thought it was a breach of academic honesty, and she defended herself saying “Well yeah, but I’m paying enough in tuition already, and I passed my actual classes without cheating, didn’t I?

She casually mentioned how when she was young, her mom used her to help shoplift. Basically, her mom would give her something to “play with” and then walk out with. And if anyone saw, her mom would act all shocked and embarrassed, like “Emma, that’s not yours to take, come back inside and apologize.” She said that she stopped doing it what she was 14 or so, but she can’t break the habit of scoping out camera angles, even if she doesn’t mean to steal anything, it’s like a puzzle to her.

Whenever she buys something expensive, she’ll fold the box flat, put the receipt in the box, and stick it all in a drawer. So if the thing ever breaks, she’ll go return it. She does that a lot, stuff like returning something she had for a year and broke, or stopped using.

——-

The stuff that bothers me the most is when it affects me.

A few weeks ago, she wanted to go to Chipotle for dinner, and I wanted to go to Panera. We couldn’t agree on where to go, so she said “You get Panera, and meet me at Chipotle to eat.” I said I wasn’t comfortable bringing outside food into another restaurant, it was really rude. She then said she’d join me at Panera after picking up a burrito at Chipotle, which I was just as uncomfortable with.

She also keeps her student ID on her all the time, even though she’s graduated, to get student discounts. Whenever we go buy stuff, she’ll ask about student discounts, and she’ll even ride free on the city’s public transit with her old ID, and visit campus gyms. (When someone sees the ID doesn’t scan correctly since it’s expired, she just complains about it being worn out) When I go somewhere with her, I get kinda uncomfortable about that.

We went to a concert and she brought a flask so she didn’t have to pay for drinks there, and offered it to me even though I said I didn’t want her to have brought it.

——-

She calls me uptight, but this stuff really does make me uncomfortable.

TLDR - My girlfriend and are on the opposite ends of the spectrum, when it comes to following rules.

The test thing is lovely, but the rest of it reveals how much of an uptight loser the OP is.

John Wick of Dogs
Mar 4, 2017

A real hellraiser


His girlfriend sounds extremely cool, what is she doing with this loser.

I bet she BRINGS OUTSIDE SNACKS TO MOVIES.

oh no you can't eat Chipotles in this Panera, what if we get in t-t-trouble?!

bamhand
Apr 15, 2010

La Brea Carpet posted:

My [21 M] girlfriend [22 F] acts like rules don't apply to her, and it makes me uncomfortable


The test thing is lovely, but the rest of it reveals how much of an uptight loser the OP is.

It kind of is but drat, if you can ace college level calc and physics after cheating to get placed into the classes, good for you.

Jeza
Feb 13, 2011

The cries of the dead are terrible indeed; you should try not to hear them.
I was expecting the list of rule violations to get worse, not more pathetic as the post went on. Smuggles drink into concert? Uses an expired student ID? Give me loving strength lmao.

Smirking_Serpent
Aug 27, 2009

someone asks the dude if they were born in different socioeconomic classes:

Kinda. Her parents weren't poor but they also aren't college educated, they just worked their asses off to get where they are. Emma definitely got her work ethic from them.

My parents are both in academia.

Now that I think of it, her family background has affected the way she thinks about a lot of things. Like she was being sexually harassed at work (She's an electrical engineer at a well known company), and she believed she couldn't report it because she'd just get hosed over to sweep it under the rug.

When her friends finally convinced her to report it, she was shocked the company didn't screw her over, because apparently that was what would have happened at the places her parents and aunt worked; someone complains, they get fired.

It upset me that what sounds like basic decency to me came as a shock to her, she genuinely believed she was going to lose her job.

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:

La Brea Carpet posted:

My [21 M] girlfriend [22 F] acts like rules don't apply to her, and it makes me uncomfortable


The test thing is lovely, but the rest of it reveals how much of an uptight loser the OP is.

I used my student ID for loving years after I graduated to get cheap movie tickets and poo poo. Finally had to stop when the details wore out. Rip cheap movie tickets.

E: ^^^ You'd think an electrical engineer with little morals would be able to deal with workplace harassment in a more direct manner. Bzzzzt.

Outrail fucked around with this message at 17:33 on Apr 30, 2018

La Brea Carpet
Nov 22, 2007

I have no mouth and I must post

Smirking_Serpent posted:

someone asks the dude if they were born in different socioeconomic classes:

Kinda. Her parents weren't poor but they also aren't college educated, they just worked their asses off to get where they are. Emma definitely got her work ethic from them.

My parents are both in academia.

Now that I think of it, her family background has affected the way she thinks about a lot of things. Like she was being sexually harassed at work (She's an electrical engineer at a well known company), and she believed she couldn't report it because she'd just get hosed over to sweep it under the rug.

When her friends finally convinced her to report it, she was shocked the company didn't screw her over, because apparently that was what would have happened at the places her parents and aunt worked; someone complains, they get fired.

It upset me that what sounds like basic decency to me came as a shock to her, she genuinely believed she was going to lose her job.

This is one of the times where this dude should literally check his privilege because lol.

Admiral Ray
May 17, 2014

Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

La Brea Carpet posted:

My [21 M] girlfriend [22 F] acts like rules don't apply to her, and it makes me uncomfortable


The test thing is lovely, but the rest of it reveals how much of an uptight loser the OP is.

Wow this lady seems like a real hardened criminal when she *squints* brings Chipotle into Panera.

quote:

When she was applying to college, she didn’t know much math, but she had her friend take her entrance exam (edit - placement exam, not entrance exam. She had already been accepted to college) she could be placed in Physics and Calculus her first semester instead of having to take remedial classes, and having to pay way more in tuition for an extra semester. She actually managed to teach herself the Algebra skills she was lacking, and get all As her freshman classes

That's pretty impressive and you're a dumb loving square that should never leave your house.

Clark Nova
Jul 18, 2004

Oh heavens, you've brought Chipotle into my pure, clean Panera Bread :lofty:

The shoplifting thing is the only one that kind of bugs me. The placement exam thing is rad as gently caress because she managed to pull it off.

efb, mostly

Admiral Ray
May 17, 2014

Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

quote:

[–]SouthYam6
[S] [score hidden] 5 minutes ago
Even if it's not hurting anyone directly, it's always super embarrassing when she does stuff like pretending to be a student or sneaking a flask somewhere, especially if people we know are around.

I get she had a different upbringing and maybe this stuff feels normal to her, but a lot of people I know would find it trashy.

Oh hell yeah there it is.

Mill Town
Apr 17, 2006

Doc Hawkins posted:

The mentioned classmates are not involved in current mobbing

The gently caress is current mobbing?

venus de lmao
Apr 30, 2007

Call me "pixeltits"

I am legitimately autistic, diagnosed by a nationally recognized expert, and even I think this guy is an uptight goober.

His girlfriend sounds extremely cool and smart. The shoplifting thing is pretty hosed up, but that's obviously klepto mom exploiting a kid to steal poo poo and homeboy makes out like it's her fault.

Baronjutter
Dec 31, 2007

"Tiny Trains"

There's a certain breed of upper middle class folk who are like this. The poor and the rich both know you basically have to break the rules to survive (or become super rich) so are fine bending the rules here and there. But upper middle class folk are often never exposed to the struggles of the poor or the machinations of the rich and honestly think they live in a just-world, a meritocracy that rewards hard work within the rules. They are taught that breaking rules isn't just morally wrong, but it leads to "poor life outcomes" or whatever. If they do everything in their life good and rule abiding they will enjoy a very nice and good life too.

They're often insufferable because they don't believe nearly 100% of the wealthy got what they got through rule breaking/bending, clearly those folk just worked harder. They also often don't believe the poor need to ever break rules just to survive, in fact that's probably why they're poor.

La Brea Carpet
Nov 22, 2007

I have no mouth and I must post
Help! My (31M) girlfriend (30f) is pregnant and keeps eating and drinking food that is on the "no list"!

quote:

I am at the end of my rope here. My girlfriend is 5 months pregnant with our first child. I am over the moon and am looking forward to fatherhood.

The problem is that she refuses to change her diet to protect the health of our baby. She keeps eating all the food that doctors say to avoid while pregnant.

She goes out to an oyster bar every week and eats raw shellfish.

Her lunch is usually salad with cheeses on the no list (she loves blue cheese) or sushi.

She will only eat rare or even completely uncooked beef and runny egg yolks. Refuses to eat them if they are cooked thoroughly.

She still drinks a few cups of coffee or tea every day.

Yesterday we got into a huge fight because she went out to brunch and had alcohol with her meal.

I'm so worried she is going to harm our baby with her behavior. What can I do?

quote:

EDIT: A few people mentioned that one of my comments should be in my OP so I'll just copy and paste that here:

"I probably should have put that in my OP too. She absolutely refuses to take prenatal vitamins. She does eat healthy overall, drinks water, and does light exercise. She's gone to her appointments, i think maybe rescheduling one or two.

She wanted to terminate because she didn't think we were ready for a child. We talked it over, I crunched the numbers and showed her we could handle it. Then she just said "ok". I don't think she was excited at first but she is getting more and more into it. Except for the whole food thing."

Tl;Dr Pregnant girlfriend doesn't follow doctor guidelines about her diet.

Brother Entropy
Dec 27, 2009

the keeping the box + receipt thing isn't even mildly shady like sneaking a flask or w/e, bougie bitch is even embarrassed when she's doing something smart and pragmatic like keeping track of expensive purchases

LadyPictureShow
Nov 18, 2005

Success!



I (27f) found some stuff on my guy's (42m) phone

quote:

Hi everyone,
So I've been with my guy for about 2 years. We've gotten along so well and have been very happy for the most part. However, our relationship is unusual due to the fact he has a medically handicapped girl he takes care of. They met in high school and was his first girlfriend. However because of her health issues, he feels obligated and feels he owes her to take care of her. They have no romantic relationship whatsoever but do care about each other. For that reason, he's always dated outside of his relationship with her (with her permission), and pursued me. Note that she doesn't know anything about me, despite her letting him date because she says she'd rather not know.
So back to the guy. Obviously I had initial doubts about him... He's so much older, he is already bound to his other girl... But I thought "why not? Let's have some fun", so what was supposed to be a casual hookup became a full blown passionate relationship.
This is where it gets weird.. A month ago when was travelling with him, I noticed he was pointing his phone downwards at a girls rear end and quickly moving his thumb as if hes capturing photos. But his phone screen is blank. This is where I decided to confront him and after a really awkward conversation, he's admitted to taking photos of girls legs and feet using a secret spy cam. He was so embarrassed and he claimed he feels no attraction to these girls other than their physical feature he's taking a photo of, and he loves me and only me. I was devastated, but he promised to never do it again and begged me to forgive him. Of course, we are now traveling again and in the middle of the night, instincts kicked in... again. I checked his phone and what do i find? Lots of secret zoomed in photos of girls feet, legs in booty shorts, and rear end. SO MANY OF IT, at least over 50. Note these girls looked young too, judging by their bodies and how they dressed, probably around teenage years. So he's lied to me, and he's obsessed with a sick hobby. And the fact he made a big deal about deleting the secret spy cam and reinstalling it makes me sick.
Reddit, I am so torn. I love him to death, and I know that ultimately he loves me too. I forgave him before, and he can't help but do it again. I feel like a fool and I've given him my life. How can he claim to love me if he's doing this behind my back and lies so easily. A part of me wants to expose him, out of sheer anger, I want him to hurt like how he's hurt me. I am having a difficult time thinking logically. What's the best way to overcome this? Should I confront him again?
Tldr: my guy took secret photos of girls rear end, feet, and legs using a spy cam app on his phone. I caught him, he claimed he's sorry and he'll never do it again, I found evidence he did it again within a month.

I can’t muster any response other than ‘ewwwwwww’.

tactlessbastard
Feb 4, 2001

Godspeed, post
Fun Shoe

Bertrand Hustle posted:

I am legitimately autistic, diagnosed by a nationally recognized expert, and even I think this guy is an uptight goober.

His girlfriend sounds extremely cool and smart. The shoplifting thing is pretty hosed up, but that's obviously klepto mom exploiting a kid to steal poo poo and homeboy makes out like it's her fault.

Look at this guy lording his legitimate autism over the rest of us


Edit: :

quote:


She wanted to terminate because she didn't think we were ready for a child. We talked it over, I crunched the numbers and showed her we could handle it. 

Oh well in that case

tactlessbastard fucked around with this message at 17:41 on Apr 30, 2018

Clark Nova
Jul 18, 2004

La Brea Carpet posted:

Help! My (31M) girlfriend (30f) is pregnant and keeps eating and drinking food that is on the "no list"!

Congrats on browbeating this lady into carrying your larvae to term using only a spreadsheet. Maybe don't expect too much more than the minimum here?

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Admiral Ray
May 17, 2014

Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

La Brea Carpet posted:

Help! My (31M) girlfriend (30f) is pregnant and keeps eating and drinking food that is on the "no list"!

quote:

[–]sheeatswrong
[S] [score hidden] 41 minutes ago
She won't really talk to me about why she wants to keep eating this stuff. She just says "I will feed myself how I see fit" and ends the conversation.

I just want our kid to be healthy. It's driving me mad to see her prioritizing her happiness over our kid's health nearly every drat day.

She should have terminated the relationship then terminated the pregnancy.

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