google: dad I hate myself and this phone is garbage

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > google: dad I hate myself and this phone is garbage

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BangersInMyKnickers: Nov 3, 2004; I have a thing for courageous dongles

I got a 10ms roundtrip on fiber to Chicago I could probably have a onlive service work well enough. If GPON gets more common then they would have a market for it

# ? Jun 29, 2018 20:14

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# ? May 30, 2024 13:58

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

whoa i just found out my provider is actually a nonprofit

i guess that might explain why i pay ~10 bucks for 1Gbps duplex

# ? Jun 29, 2018 20:42

anthonypants: May 6, 2007; by Nyc_Tattoo; Dinosaur Gum

ugh chrome 68 does the windows 10 native notifications

# ? Jun 29, 2018 23:22

TwoDice: Feb 11, 2005; Not one, two.; Grimey Drawer

BangersInMyKnickers posted:

I got a 10ms roundtrip on fiber to Chicago I could probably have a onlive service work well enough. If GPON gets more common then they would have a market for it

if you can get 10ms e2e latency to a data center on a low latency display that�d probably be good for most games
idk if that�s feasible tho

# ? Jun 29, 2018 23:27

Lambert: Apr 15, 2018; by Fluffdaddy; Fallen Rib

anthonypants posted:

ugh chrome 68 does the windows 10 native notifications

And that's a good thing.

TwoDice posted:

if you can get 10ms e2e latency to a data center on a low latency display that�d probably be good for most games
idk if that�s feasible tho

With how much the government is investing in FTTH, everyone will be on fiber very soon. Oh, wait.

# ? Jun 29, 2018 23:29

Cocoa Crispies: Jul 20, 2001; Vehicular Manslaughter!; Pillbug

TwoDice posted:

if you can get 10ms e2e latency to a data center on a low latency display that�d probably be good for most games
idk if that�s feasible tho

android can�t even get 10ms latency for scrolling text lol

# ? Jun 30, 2018 05:22

PleasureKevin: Jan 2, 2011

this thread sounds exactly like DYP

Jabor posted:

200ms server latency is playable, you just get shot around corners a bit (because you weren't around the corner yet on the other guy's screen). not ideal but it's still workable.

hell it's even playable without lag compensation, you just get used to leading even your hitscan shots. then you go to lan and start potatoing everything because you're leading people too much, lmao

exactly, folks play emulated games with bluetooth controllers on TVs that process the image and add further delay. people adjust to the lag because our brains can apparently do that.

but discuss it online and gaming is just not possible unless you have whatever the latest product on the shelf is from the companies with the biggest marketing budgets 🤔. this stays perpetually true even though technology is known to advance over time.

oddly these same idiots will talk endlessly about old home micro-computers, consoles and videos games while calling every platform or PC configuration different than their own unplayable garbage. this is because the part of our brain that�s responds to marketing has turned the part of our brain that feels nostalgia into it�s bitch. maybe because so much of nostalgia isn�t actually recalling anything into memory so much as getting hyped about re-makes, re-releases, sequels and minified versions of things.

for example, if i were to go into a forum that�s colour palette is intentionally limited to monochrome colours and say �goldeneye was an FPS that should have required low latency and tight controls but it ran at about 5fps in multiplayer and used terribly flaky joystick for controls, yet it was a critical and commercial success that no one has an ill word about� the very next comment would likely be one saying that it�s not worth playing anything on less than a 4K display with HDR.

this is because their main sources of dopamine are shopping, researching and arguing on the Internet about what computer thing is the best and most powerful. and some of them have been doing it for 15 to 20 years. trying to convince anyone here that they don�t actually need to keep up this habit is like trying to convince someone in the crackhead clubhouse that they have a cocaine problem.

or like trying to convince anyone on any sub forum or IRC channel that clearly has a cocaine problem that they have a cocaine problem.

# ? Jun 30, 2018 10:19

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

this is the least pleasurable stock tip ever kevin

# ? Jun 30, 2018 10:47

flakeloaf: Feb 26, 2003; Still better than android clock

PleasureKevin posted:

oddly these same idiots will talk endlessly about old home micro-computers, consoles and videos games while calling every platform or PC configuration different than their own unplayable garbage. this is because the part of our brain that�s responds to marketing has turned the part of our brain that feels nostalgia into it�s bitch. maybe because so much of nostalgia isn�t actually recalling anything into memory so much as getting hyped about re-makes, re-releases, sequels and minified versions of things.

the past is very comfortable where it is, asleep and vaguely present but also not

look at it once in a while if you want to but don't try to wake it up

# ? Jun 30, 2018 16:21

The MUMPSorceress: Jan 6, 2012; ^SHTPSTS; Gary’s Answer

PleasureKevin posted:

this thread sounds exactly like DYP

exactly, folks play emulated games with bluetooth controllers on TVs that process the image and add further delay. people adjust to the lag because our brains can apparently do that.

but discuss it online and gaming is just not possible unless you have whatever the latest product on the shelf is from the companies with the biggest marketing budgets 🤔. this stays perpetually true even though technology is known to advance over time.

oddly these same idiots will talk endlessly about old home micro-computers, consoles and videos games while calling every platform or PC configuration different than their own unplayable garbage. this is because the part of our brain that’s responds to marketing has turned the part of our brain that feels nostalgia into it’s bitch. maybe because so much of nostalgia isn’t actually recalling anything into memory so much as getting hyped about re-makes, re-releases, sequels and minified versions of things.

for example, if i were to go into a forum that’s colour palette is intentionally limited to monochrome colours and say “goldeneye was an FPS that should have required low latency and tight controls but it ran at about 5fps in multiplayer and used terribly flaky joystick for controls, yet it was a critical and commercial success that no one has an ill word about” the very next comment would likely be one saying that it’s not worth playing anything on less than a 4K display with HDR.

this is because their main sources of dopamine are shopping, researching and arguing on the Internet about what computer thing is the best and most powerful. and some of them have been doing it for 15 to 20 years. trying to convince anyone here that they don’t actually need to keep up this habit is like trying to convince someone in the crackhead clubhouse that they have a cocaine problem.

or like trying to convince anyone on any sub forum or IRC channel that clearly has a cocaine problem that they have a cocaine problem.

And then these same idiots make fun of "grills" for doing frivolous things like shopping for fashionable clothes. Gaming hardware is Armani Exchange for toxic nerds.

# ? Jun 30, 2018 22:14

jeffery: Jan 1, 2013

intra-proletariat class warfare

# ? Jun 30, 2018 22:15

Lambert: Apr 15, 2018; by Fluffdaddy; Fallen Rib

jit bull transpile posted:

And then these same idiots make fun of "grills" for doing frivolous things like shopping for fashionable clothes. Gaming hardware is Armani Exchange for toxic nerds.

Or, just maybe, there's an actual reason game streaming hasn't taken off so far and that reason is latency makes streamed games feel terrible?

# ? Jun 30, 2018 22:53

ClassActionFursuit: Mar 15, 2006

kevin is giving me a lot of pleasure itt

# ? Jun 30, 2018 23:11

anthonypants: May 6, 2007; by Nyc_Tattoo; Dinosaur Gum

lol https://medium.com/@serverpunch/why-you-should-not-use-google-cloud-75ea2aec00de

# ? Jul 1, 2018 23:41

fishmech: Jul 16, 2006; by VideoGames; Salad Prong

PleasureKevin posted:

this thread sounds exactly like DYP

exactly, folks play emulated games with bluetooth controllers on TVs that process the image and add further delay. people adjust to the lag because our brains can apparently do that.

but discuss it online and gaming is just not possible unless you have whatever the latest product on the shelf is from the companies with the biggest marketing budgets 🤔. this stays perpetually true even though technology is known to advance over time.

oddly these same idiots will talk endlessly about old home micro-computers, consoles and videos games while calling every platform or PC configuration different than their own unplayable garbage. this is because the part of our brain that’s responds to marketing has turned the part of our brain that feels nostalgia into it’s bitch. maybe because so much of nostalgia isn’t actually recalling anything into memory so much as getting hyped about re-makes, re-releases, sequels and minified versions of things.

for example, if i were to go into a forum that’s colour palette is intentionally limited to monochrome colours and say “goldeneye was an FPS that should have required low latency and tight controls but it ran at about 5fps in multiplayer and used terribly flaky joystick for controls, yet it was a critical and commercial success that no one has an ill word about” the very next comment would likely be one saying that it’s not worth playing anything on less than a 4K display with HDR.

this is because their main sources of dopamine are shopping, researching and arguing on the Internet about what computer thing is the best and most powerful. and some of them have been doing it for 15 to 20 years. trying to convince anyone here that they don’t actually need to keep up this habit is like trying to convince someone in the crackhead clubhouse that they have a cocaine problem.

or like trying to convince anyone on any sub forum or IRC channel that clearly has a cocaine problem that they have a cocaine problem.

your bad at video games

# ? Jul 1, 2018 23:47

Fiedler: Jun 29, 2002; I, for one, welcome our new mouse overlords.

anthonypants posted:

lol https://medium.com/@serverpunch/why-you-should-not-use-google-cloud-75ea2aec00de

somewhere in google: hey we send out a lot of automated mails notifying users that we're closing their accounts and deleting all of their data... i bet we could sell some ad space in those mails!

# ? Jul 2, 2018 02:29

hobbesmaster: Jan 28, 2008

anthonypants posted:

lol https://medium.com/@serverpunch/why-you-should-not-use-google-cloud-75ea2aec00de

woah a rare good reddit comment!

quote:

Customers don't want customer service, they want another chat app

-Google

# ? Jul 2, 2018 03:43

The Management: Jan 2, 2010; sup, bitch?

anthonypants posted:

lol https://medium.com/@serverpunch/why-you-should-not-use-google-cloud-75ea2aec00de

gently caress. remember that the google account death penalty can shut down everything. so if your company runs on google apps, the person who would be seeing the failure notifications might not even be able to access their email to analyze they problem, may be unreachable on chat, and you can�t access the company contacts to find their phone number.

# ? Jul 3, 2018 15:24

flakeloaf: Feb 26, 2003; Still better than android clock

single sign-off

# ? Jul 3, 2018 15:40

Shaggar: Apr 26, 2006

anthonypants posted:

lol https://medium.com/@serverpunch/why-you-should-not-use-google-cloud-75ea2aec00de

lol

# ? Jul 3, 2018 15:45

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

google does not understand the concept of "business critical", runs everything like their free email platform

# ? Jul 3, 2018 16:10

flakeloaf: Feb 26, 2003; Still better than android clock

google: where complimentary and critical mean the same thing

# ? Jul 3, 2018 16:13

Gynocentric Regime: Jun 9, 2010; by Cyrano4747

infernal machines posted:

google does not understand the concept of "business critical", runs everything like their free email platform

They do, it's just that the only business that is critical is theirs.

vvv Yeah but Google guarantees five nines too and it's cheaper! :downs:

vvv

Gynocentric Regime fucked around with this message at 18:08 on Jul 3, 2018

# ? Jul 3, 2018 16:14

hobbesmaster: Jan 28, 2008

infernal machines posted:

google does not understand the concept of "business critical", runs everything like their free email platform

yeah i work with iot customers and the options is always aws or azure, gcs is a joke

# ? Jul 3, 2018 16:29

ADINSX: Sep 9, 2003; Wanna run with my crew huh? Rule cyberspace and crunch numbers like I do?

hobbesmaster posted:

yeah i work with iot customers and the options is always aws or azure, gcs is a joke

We're using the joke option

# ? Jul 3, 2018 19:14

fishmech: Jul 16, 2006; by VideoGames; Salad Prong

The Management posted:

gently caress. remember that the google account death penalty can shut down everything. so if your company runs on google apps, the person who would be seeing the failure notifications might not even be able to access their email to analyze they problem, may be unreachable on chat, and you can�t access the company contacts to find their phone number.

i purportedly make millions of dollars a day but cant spend a few thousand a year to make sure i have someone on call with my account credentials

# ? Jul 3, 2018 19:40

anthonypants: May 6, 2007; by Nyc_Tattoo; Dinosaur Gum

fishmech posted:

i purportedly make millions of dollars a day but cant spend a few thousand a year to make sure i have someone on call with my account credentials

yes, it is weird that google doesn't do this

# ? Jul 3, 2018 20:00

Jose Valasquez: Apr 8, 2005

anthonypants posted:

yes, it is weird that google doesn't do this

GCP has 24x7 customer support but you have to pay extra for it

# ? Jul 3, 2018 20:15

Cocoa Crispies: Jul 20, 2001; Vehicular Manslaughter!; Pillbug

Jose Valasquez posted:

GCP has 24x7 customer support but you have to pay extra for it

tbf so does AWS and probably azure and if you're not charging for support, you're leaving money on the table

# ? Jul 3, 2018 20:20

The Management: Jan 2, 2010; sup, bitch?

Jose Valasquez posted:

GCP has 24x7 customer support but you have to pay extra for it

does that protect you from having a google robot randomly shutting down your account?

# ? Jul 3, 2018 21:05

fishmech: Jul 16, 2006; by VideoGames; Salad Prong

anthonypants posted:

yes, it is weird that google doesn't do this

google has support, these morons pretending to be a real company apparently didn't pay for it and they were also too stupid to have their vital verification info be more than "the card one guy carries with him all the time without any sort of oncall responsibility"

# ? Jul 3, 2018 21:34

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

i'm socked, SHOCKED, that a company using gcp for business critical infrastructure would also fail to have even basic business continuity processes

infernal machines fucked around with this message at 21:56 on Jul 3, 2018

# ? Jul 3, 2018 21:39

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

i mean what are the odds?

# ? Jul 3, 2018 21:39

hobbesmaster: Jan 28, 2008

Jose Valasquez posted:

GCP has 24x7 customer support but you have to pay extra for it

i thought they did pay for it; but theres a lot of different levels you can pay for

# ? Jul 3, 2018 21:45

anthonypants: May 6, 2007; by Nyc_Tattoo; Dinosaur Gum

since the first email was from google payments i think it's a very safe assumption that if they did have gcp support they were directed to google payments customer support, for which no phone number exists

# ? Jul 3, 2018 21:52

PleasureKevin: Jan 2, 2011

i hate when youtube demonetizes my uh wind turbines

# ? Jul 3, 2018 21:54

hobbesmaster: Jan 28, 2008

anthonypants posted:

since the first email was from google payments i think it's a very safe assumption that if they did have gcp support they were directed to google payments customer support, for which no phone number exists