Bad With Money 2018: When I die, bury me in the blockchain.

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Bad With Money 2018: When I die, bury me in the blockchain.

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KYOON GRIFFEY JR: Apr 12, 2010; Runner-up, TRP Sack Race 2021/22

i knew a girl who didn't match, which was good, because she sucked

she ended up matching the next year though

# ? Jul 20, 2018 00:12

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# ? Jun 7, 2024 23:00

Vox Nihili: May 28, 2008

George H.W. oval office posted:

Becoming a doctor sounds annoying as hell

The whole "permanent, lucrative employment unless you basically murder someone" thing seems pretty good.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 00:13

Darkrenown: Jul 18, 2012; please give me anything to talk about besides the fact that democrats are allowing millions of americans to be evicted from their homes

Not quite as good as being a cop though.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 00:16

OctaviusBeaver: Apr 30, 2009; Say what now?

The people I knew in undergrad who became doctors make me scared to get medical treatment. One sells healing crystals on the side (gwm) and another paid somebody to do his senior project.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 00:26

HelloIAmYourHeart: Dec 29, 2008; Fallen Rib

My partner (34) wants to buy a house. How do I (24) tell him about my trust fund when he holds disdain for "trust fund babies"? https://snew.github.io/r/relationships/comments/8zljuf/my_partner_34_wants_to_buy_a_house_how_do_i_24/

quote:

Hey r/relationships! Hope your day is going swell.

My partner (M, 34) and I (F, 24) have been together for 1.5 years. He's great, we're both committed, and while we think marriage is a bit of a sham and a lot of fuss, we've talked about it and want to be legally bound to each other down the line. Especially because we hold different citizenship. Having said that, it's not a priority for us right now.

We recently moved countries to be closer to his family, and he's looking into buying a house. Finances haven't come up too much between us. He makes good money, I make decent money, and we split bills in accordance with our salaries (we've been living together for 6 months). His plan is to put down the majority of the deposit and pay the mortgage because my salary / personal savings aren't nearly as substantial. The plan is to then rent out the place while we stay in our apartment (2 year lease), which is closer to our jobs and relatively affordable.

Here's the thing - the type of house he wants to buy (in an area we like) is out of his price range by about $150k. We live in a major city in Australia, where housing prices are loving nuts. I have a trust fund of about $200k, soon to be $275k thanks to an inheritance. It's in a bank account back home, he doesn't know about it, and the only time I've ever touched that money was to buy a used car when I moved ($8k).

My partner is very much a self-made person. His parents are cool, but got divorced when he was pretty young and it threw the family into a spin. He never had help with anything, despite them both eventually being pretty well-off. He got scholarships and worked hard to pay off his schooling - a bachelor's, masters, and eventually PhD. He worked his way up from being a teenage punk (who literally dropped out of high school for a while) to a highly respected researcher in his field. He grew up with (and studied) with a number of "trust fund babies" who he has always despised. It's the only group of people he's acted overly judge-y about, or spoke negatively of without any prompt. It's really unlike any of his other opinions and is the closest thing to hatred I've seen him express.

In terms of me / my fund - I actually grew up pretty poor (utilities would get shut off regularly) but my mom's career took off when I was 10. My dad followed shortly after, and by the time I finished highschool we had a household income of $350k. My immigrant parents were always incredibly frugal. Throughout the transition from poor to wealthy, we never moved houses, bought a new car, or splurged on anything except travelling together. They saved everything for me and my younger brother. They wanted us to be able to go to any school, buy a house, have kids without worries, etc. My partner has met my parents and visited my home country, but because my parents still live like poor people, he never asked questions.

Which brings us to today. I have enough money to go in on this investment with my partner, and secure a house that we'd be happy to turn into a forever home down the line. I know it can be a bit complicated if we're not married, but I don't really want to rush that. My main concern is - what's the best way to bring up this trust fund and the idea of going in on the house together? I'm worried he'll outright reject it as "help / influence from my parents", or some weird leverage thing (his Dad offered once to help with finances but it turned out to be a bit of a power play). He might also be upset that I haven't mentioned the fund before. To be honest I've never known how to bring it up, and never brainstormed a plan to. Worst case scenario, he denounces me outright for being a trust fund baby and thinks it de-legitimizes the other things I've earned / achieved. That one's a bit drastic, but I'm jut putting it out there for good measure.

So reddit - how do I bring up this topic with my partner? What's a good way to prep / phrase the situation and avoid potential triggers?

TLDR; My partner hates trust fund babies and doesn't know that I am one. He wants to buy a house and I can help, how do I tell him about my trust fund and convince him to accept it?

Sure, spend your parents' hard earned cash on a house for a guy that you've been dating for less than two years and who is 10 years older than you and that you have no intention of marrying anytime soon. I see no downside here.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 00:32

GoGoGadgetChris: Mar 18, 2010; i powder a
granite monument
in a soundless flash

showering the grass
with molten drops of
its gold inlay

sending smoking
chips of stone
skipping into the fog

Oh gee how will she break the news of her incredibly vast $150k (USD) fortune

# ? Jul 20, 2018 00:38

Weatherman: Jul 30, 2003; WARBLEKLONK

GoGoGadgetShitpost!

# ? Jul 20, 2018 00:44

baquerd: Jul 2, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

HelloIAmYourHeart posted:

Sure, spend your parents' hard earned cash on a house for a guy that you've been dating for less than two years and who is 10 years older than you and that you have no intention of marrying anytime soon. I see no downside here.

It will, if nothing else, solidify his view of trust fund babies as incapable.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 00:45

Guinness: Sep 15, 2004

Buying a home with someone that you aren't married to is pretty up there on the BWM list. Just setting yourself up for pain.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 00:50

Mocking Bird: Aug 17, 2011

# ? Jul 20, 2018 01:35

the talent deficit: Dec 20, 2003; self-deprecation is a very british trait, and problems can arise when the british attempt to do so with a foreign culture

KYOON GRIFFEY JR posted:

I think it's a true violation and not mental health because she says "intense circumstances" and not "personal health reasons" but it's way less fun if the dude just had a breakdown.

why would he have to repeat 4th year if it's just a match violation? i guess he could have cheated on step or something but that seems more like you're forever barred from being a doctor

# ? Jul 20, 2018 01:35

KingSlime: Mar 20, 2007; Wake up with the Kin-OH GOD WHAT IS THAT?!

drat, Bill Dixon taking on that loan is just a massive parenting failure. You're supposed to teach your children that the world is a cold, predatory hellscape!

This is like being a living organism 101....

# ? Jul 20, 2018 01:47

Colin Mockery: Jun 24, 2007; Rawr

baquerd posted:

It will, if nothing else, solidify his view of trust fund babies as incapable.

I thought you had to be fully provided for by your trust fund to count as a trust fund baby.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 01:48

Inept: Jul 8, 2003

GoGoGadgetChris posted:

My wealthy peers in the $101,000+ caste typically have a solid 750+ too due to low utilization and their primary/vacation home mortgages

GoGoGadgetChris posted:

He sounds a lot more like an anchor than she does, imho.

But I've said it before and I'll say it again - never marry below your caste

GoGoGadgetChris posted:

This is why you never marry outside your caste

GoGoGadgetChris posted:

Both in 6 figure debt

Bot low income

Same economic caste confirmed

Marriage approved

This is weird.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 01:49

Spokes: Jan 9, 2010; Thanks for a MONSTER of an avatar, Awful Survivor Mods!

HelloIAmYourHeart posted:

My partner (34) wants to buy a house. How do I (24) tell him about my trust fund when he holds disdain for "trust fund babies"? https://snew.github.io/r/relationships/comments/8zljuf/my_partner_34_wants_to_buy_a_house_how_do_i_24/

Sure, spend your parents' hard earned cash on a house for a guy that you've been dating for less than two years and who is 10 years older than you and that you have no intention of marrying anytime soon. I see no downside here.

sssssseeeeeeeeeevvvvvvvvvveeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

# ? Jul 20, 2018 01:49

GoGoGadgetChris: Mar 18, 2010; i powder a
granite monument
in a soundless flash

showering the grass
with molten drops of
its gold inlay

sending smoking
chips of stone
skipping into the fog

Literally all of those posts were snide responses to gross "they need to break up because 1 is poor and 1 is not" posts

# ? Jul 20, 2018 01:50

Inept: Jul 8, 2003

GoGoGadgetChris posted:

Literally all of those posts were snide responses to gross "they need to break up because 1 is poor and 1 is not" posts

Saying it's a bad idea to get married to someone whose financial goals do not align with yours is not gross (these posts are almost always about huge ignored debts of one partner/spouse and not differences in income or earning potential), and talking about it like it's a caste system is weird and inaccurate.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 01:58

GoGoGadgetChris: Mar 18, 2010; i powder a
granite monument
in a soundless flash

showering the grass
with molten drops of
its gold inlay

sending smoking
chips of stone
skipping into the fog

Inept posted:

Saying it's a bad idea to get married to someone whose financial goals do not align with yours is not gross

Put your Sherlock hat back on and hop back into my post history to see I'm not responding to the very reasonable posts you're describing here.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 02:04

RC and Moon Pie: May 5, 2011

A Jeopardy contestant tonight revealed she collects designer purses. I can't remember the exact comment, but she indicated a lot had been spent on those purses. Chanel was her favorite.

Here are discount Chanel bags.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 03:01

potatoducks: Jan 26, 2006

Any reason to think she couldn�t afford it?

# ? Jul 20, 2018 03:24

Eldred: Feb 19, 2004; Weight gain is impossible.

Since they're often limited edition designer handbags might hold value pretty well. Better than an expensive car, at any rate.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 03:29

Dik Hz: Feb 22, 2004; Fun with Science

Inept posted:

Saying it's a bad idea to get married to someone whose financial goals do not align with yours is not gross (these posts are almost always about huge ignored debts of one partner/spouse and not differences in income or earning potential), and talking about it like it's a caste system is weird and inaccurate.

The trust fund in question is like 1-2 years' salary. It's not like its life-changing money.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 04:06

Harry: Jun 13, 2003; I do solemnly swear that in the year 2015 I will theorycraft my wallet as well as my WoW

Weatherman posted:

GoGoGadgetShitpost!

A $150k trust fund is like winning a lottery scratch off ticket and getting $2,000. A waste of luck.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 04:08

Tipps: Apr 18, 2006; party in the front

business in the back

potatoducks posted:

Any reason to think she couldn’t afford it?

She was a stay at home mom.

she ended up in 3rd place

# ? Jul 20, 2018 04:10

boop the snoot: Jun 3, 2016

Harry posted:

A $150k trust fund is like winning a lottery scratch off ticket and getting $2,000. A waste of luck.

Well if your luck ever gets wasted just pass it my way.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 04:14

Krispy Wafer: Jul 26, 2002; I shouted out "Free the exposed 67"
But they stood on my hair and told me I was fat; Grimey Drawer

Harry posted:

A $150k trust fund is like winning a lottery scratch off ticket and getting $2,000. A waste of luck.

In the right hands it's life changing.

Two...count'em two Ford Raptors.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 06:23

tomapot: Apr 7, 2005; Suppose you're thinkin' about a plate o' shrimp. Suddenly someone'll say, like, plate, or shrimp, or plate o' shrimp out of the blue, no explanation. No point in lookin' for one, either. It's all part of a cosmic unconciousness.; Oven Wrangler

I was just on a business trip and flipping around radio stations. There was an ad on a Christian talk radio station, one that does bible studies, that kind of thing. The commercial was for day trading courses/training. The hook was that you could get a second income �for free� which allows you to provide for your family and fund your favorite ministries. Nice hook for that audience.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 07:02

Loan Dusty Road: Feb 27, 2007

Did we all read the same thing? Her parents are still alive making $350k a year and live like they are poor? On top of a quarter million trust fund that she's already received.

quote:

by the time I finished highschool we had a household income of $350k. My immigrant parents were always incredibly frugal. Throughout the transition from poor to wealthy, we never moved houses, bought a new car, or splurged on anything except travelling together. They saved everything for me and my younger brother. They wanted us to be able to go to any school, buy a house, have kids without worries, etc. My partner has met my parents and visited my home country, but because my parents still live like poor people, he never asked questions.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 08:16

Suspicious Lump: Mar 11, 2004

DEMAG posted:

Buy what you like. Simple as that. Even if you don't buy anything just looking around is a good way to use your time.

Thinking about some kawaii animu girl with her panties on display. Maybe no pantsu.

"Absolutely not. Here's what I bought. Spent 6 hours traipsing all over Akihabara for her."

<--- this is what he bought.

:stare:

he also says:

quote:

Might pick up a waifu pillow or something.

Suspicious Lump fucked around with this message at 09:22 on Jul 20, 2018

# ? Jul 20, 2018 09:20

Leon Trotsky 2012: Aug 27, 2009; YOU CAN TRUST ME!*

_{*Israeli Government-affiliated poster}

Wolfy posted:

Husband racks up $400K in medical school debt, decides he wants to make $48K a year doing research.

https://www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/comments/906m2l/fiance_has_390000_in_student_loan_debt_how_on/?st=JJSZOHHH&sh=7369e88a

Gotta C&P the body.

The truly embarrassing ones where everyone comes out hard against the OP always get deleted in shame.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 14:10

Leon Trotsky 2012: Aug 27, 2009; YOU CAN TRUST ME!*

_{*Israeli Government-affiliated poster}

Maybe Millennials and Boomers aren't so different after all.

I do kind of love that less than half the people who have a mortgage that is >40% of their gross income think they made a financial mistake.

And so many people agree to waive a home inspection to make their bid more attractive.

quote:

Almost 70% of millennials regret buying their homes.

About four in 10 millennials are already homeowners, according to a new survey of over 600 millennials (age 21-34) by Bank of the West. Yet it turns out that 68 percent of them are feeling buyer�s remorse � almost double the amount of Baby Boomers who say they have regrets.

�Millennials are so eager to become homeowners that some may be inadvertently cutting off their nose to spite their face,� says Ryan Bailey, head of Bank of the West�s retail banking.

Here are the biggest areas of remorse.

Roughly four in 10 millennials felt they made poor financial choices when it came to purchasing their home. Part of the problem seems to revolve around the down payment. The survey found one in three millennials dipped into their retirement accounts to pay for their homes � a trend Bailey calls �alarming.�

One of the biggest issues is buyers "falling in love" with a house before looking at prices. To keep from getting squeezed, think about what you can afford as a monthly payment, and don't forget to include taxes and insurance in your calculations, Danielle Hale, chief economist for Realtor.com, tells CNBC Make It. "Don't fall in love with something that's already out of your price range," Hale says.

Millennials understand basic costs, such heating and electric bills, but over two-thirds of them underestimated the annual expenses and time that maintenance costs. Bailey recommends also considering how much time and money it could take to mow the lawn, clean the house or deal with leaky faucet.

�When you�re a homeowner, you can�t call your landlord to fix things, so you want to make sure you have a little extra cash in the bank,� Hale says.

It's a big transition going from renter to homeowner, so make sure to take some time to learn about the maintenance costs associated with potential homes.

Finding the right fit is as important as having the right budget when it comes to home ownership. The survey found that about half of millennials had regrets about the home itself.

One in five said they were frustrated by damages they found after moving in, while others said they discovered the house didn't end up working well for their family.

To avoid unexpected expenses, experts recommend getting a home inspection before finalizing the sale. "Especially if you're a first-time buyer or new to home ownership, you may not even know what to look for, so you definitely want to have the expert on your side," Hale says.

It can also help to nail down what you really need in a home. Make a list of your must-haves before you start looking and know what you're willing to compromise on, Hale says.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 14:18

Harry: Jun 13, 2003; I do solemnly swear that in the year 2015 I will theorycraft my wallet as well as my WoW

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:

Gotta C&P the body.

The truly embarrassing ones where everyone comes out hard against the OP always get deleted in shame.

Replacing the "r" in the reddit with "c" will usually bring it back.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 14:24

MisterOblivious: Mar 17, 2010; by sebmojo

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:

Gotta C&P the body.

The truly embarrassing ones where everyone comes out hard against the OP always get deleted in shame.

Just stick Move in the URL. Or use ceddit (there's a link to ceddit on removeddit). You might need to hit the show all posts button if it's defaulting to a dumb display setting again.

https://www.removeddit.com/r/personalfinance/comments/906m2l/fiance_has_390000_in_student_loan_debt_how_on/?st=JJSZOHHH&sh=7369e88a

https://ceddit.com/r/personalfinance/comments/906m2l/fiance_has_390000_in_student_loan_debt_how_on/?st=JJSZOHHH&sh=7369e88a

# ? Jul 20, 2018 14:30

Sock The Great: Oct 1, 2006; It's Lonely At The Top. But It's Comforting To Look Down Upon Everyone At The Bottom; Grimey Drawer

I always thought the lender required you to have the home inspected prior to approving the loan. Who would borrow that kind of money without having the house inspected.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 14:37

mastershakeman: Oct 28, 2008; by vyelkin

quote:

The survey found one in three millennials dipped into their retirement accounts to pay for their homes

Yeah right, millennials don't have retirement accounts

# ? Jul 20, 2018 14:39

BEHOLD: MY CAPE: Jan 11, 2004

Sock The Great posted:

I always thought the lender required you to have the home inspected prior to approving the loan. Who would borrow that kind of money without having the house inspected.

Lender requires an appraisal which isn't really the same thing

# ? Jul 20, 2018 15:00

metallicaeg: Nov 28, 2005; Evil Red Wings Owner Wario Lemieux Steals Stanley Cup

Sock The Great posted:

I always thought the lender required you to have the home inspected prior to approving the loan. Who would borrow that kind of money without having the house inspected.

I thought so as well, which made me particularly surprised at the shitter of a house my cousin just bought recently that failed so badly that his insurance won't insure the house until a list of items are fixed or replaced.

v: that makes more sense then, as I went FHA

metallicaeg fucked around with this message at 15:04 on Jul 20, 2018

# ? Jul 20, 2018 15:01

Leon Trotsky 2012: Aug 27, 2009; YOU CAN TRUST ME!*

_{*Israeli Government-affiliated poster}

metallicaeg posted:

I thought so as well, which made me particularly surprised at the shitter of a house my cousin just bought recently that failed so badly that his insurance won't insure the house until a list of items are fixed or replaced.

I believe that FHA and VA loans are the only kind with an actual hard requirement of a home inspection.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 15:02

Baxate: Feb 1, 2011

Sock The Great posted:

I always thought the lender required you to have the home inspected prior to approving the loan. Who would borrow that kind of money without having the house inspected.

My lender only required inspections of termites and radon. Anything beyond that was optional.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 15:03

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# ? Jun 7, 2024 23:00

Hoodwinker: Nov 7, 2005

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:

Maybe Millennials and Boomers aren't so different after all.

I do kind of love that less than half the people who have a mortgage that is >40% of their gross income think they made a financial mistake.

And so many people agree to waive a home inspection to make their bid more attractive.

A couple of posters rightfully pointed out that the sample size is horribly small and the wording of the questions was misrepresented in the title.

# ? Jul 20, 2018 15:04

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Bad With Money 2018: When I die, bury me in the blockchain.

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