- ShinyBirdTeeth
-
sparkle sparkle sparkle
|
A single, enormous wheat grain baked and dusted with flour
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2018 13:12
|
|
- Adbot
-
ADBOT LOVES YOU
|
|
|
#
?
May 11, 2024 05:08
|
|
- Farecoal
-
There he go
|
BYOB Initial Public Offering
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2018 13:29
|
|
- Kthulhu5000
-
by R. Guyovich
|
Things are going pretty good at your lunch meeting with famed actress Scarlett Johansson. She's charming, down-to-earth, and still seems grounded and in touch despite her fame, success, and wealth.
Then your server arrives with your meals. They place an Asian fusion-style chicken pasta dish in front of you. In front of Scarlett Johansson, they place a silver plate, upon which is a pile of gold nuggets and a salad of Japanese 10,000 yen notes with ruby 'cherry tomatoes', garnished around the edge with shredded $100 bills.
----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2018 19:44
|
|
- alnilam
-
|
I smile into her eyes and say "are you gonna finish that"
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2018 19:47
|
|
- Kthulhu5000
-
by R. Guyovich
|
Remember that TV chef? The French one who was on public television forever? The one who had the calamitous kitchen catastrophes every single episode?
The catastrophes that somehow seemed to always make him lose his pants every time? Turns out that was all intentional. All 129 episodes, risking life and limb just to expose himself.
----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2018 19:51
|
|
- Kthulhu5000
-
by R. Guyovich
|
Tearing up the best seller charts:
You Can Come Back From It: Overcoming Social Anxiety By Intentionally making GBS threads Yourself In Public
----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
|
|
#
?
Jul 15, 2018 23:45
|
|
- Cubone
-
Because it never leaves its bedroom, no one has ever seen this poster's real face.
|
[goon meet] I'll be at Dairy Queen later
|
|
#
?
Jul 16, 2018 00:51
|
|
- krampster2
-
|
Aliens can travel between solar systems to come here and infiltrate our minds, but they can't figure their way past a man with some store brand tin foil on his head.
*Bunch of super-intelligent alien scientists in their lab, gathered around a role of tin foil, scrutinising it and performing various experiments on this high-tech material*
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2018 01:29
|
|
- Kthulhu5000
-
by R. Guyovich
|
In its bid to basically own all media, Disney acquires the NFL. As part of revamping the league to fit the Disney image, they introduce character mascot football uniforms and require players to wear them at all times while in public.
And so we the adoring public will get to be treated to seeing our favorite Disney characters engaging in such family friendly fun as making passes, scoring touchdowns, and emptying illegally acquired MAC-10 machine pistols into the engine block of a Russian businessman's limo outside of a Miami strip club while high on PCP.
----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2018 02:30
|
|
- phantump21
-
Just a tree stump ghost.
|
In its bid to basically own all media, Disney acquires the NFL. As part of revamping the league to fit the Disney image, they introduce character mascot football uniforms and require players to wear them at all times while in public.
And so we the adoring public will get to be treated to seeing our favorite Disney characters engaging in such family friendly fun as making passes, scoring touchdowns, and emptying illegally acquired MAC-10 machine pistols into the engine block of a Russian businessman's limo outside of a Miami strip club while high on PCP.
That’s genius. Especially for the guy wearing the stitch suit. And only wearing a jersey over it. No pants or knee pads.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2018 02:32
|
|
- Farecoal
-
There he go
|
The sequel to Gunsmoke nobody asked for: Weedsmoke
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2018 02:38
|
|
- TheShrike
-
You mechs may have copper wiring to re-route your fear of pain, but I've got nerves of steel.
|
The sequel to Gunsmoke nobody asked for: Weedsmoke
Treesmoke
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2018 02:55
|
|
- got any sevens
-
by Cyrano4747
|
Where there's Gunsmoke there're Firearms
----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2018 02:57
|
|
- Cubone
-
Because it never leaves its bedroom, no one has ever seen this poster's real face.
|
From WBEZ Chicago and Public Radio International, it's This American Life. I'm Ira Glass. Today's program is about peepee
|
|
#
?
Jul 18, 2018 20:46
|
|
- cda
-
by Hand Knit
|
From WBEZ Chicago and Public Radio International, it's This American Life. I'm Ira Glass. Today's program is about peepee
this is a good one, it shoudl be a thread
----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
|
|
#
?
Jul 19, 2018 02:16
|
|
- got any sevens
-
by Cyrano4747
|
first video: slipping down the steps of the pantheon or some long outdoor staircase because it's covered in wild dog and chicken and people poop and piss
----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
|
|
#
?
Jul 19, 2018 02:40
|
|
- got any sevens
-
by Cyrano4747
|
A company whose service is to go around at night shaving a little of chair and table legs off at restaurants so they're uneven.
----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
|
|
#
?
Jul 19, 2018 03:16
|
|
- Abugadu
-
1st Sgt. Matthews and the men have Procured for me a cummerbund from a traveling gypsy, who screeched Victory shall come at a Terrible price. i am Honored.
|
A company whose service is to go around at night shaving a little of chair and table legs off at restaurants so they're uneven.
*camera flips to the factory where they make thin disposable coasters for drinks*
Chairman, overlooking production line: Yes, yeeesssss, it's all coming to fruition. Our production has doubled. Small investment, big payouts. And they doubted me.
Underling: The LegShavin' Inc. company that we use has just increased it's rates 7% due to its recent collective bargaining agreement after the workers unionized.
Chairman, his eyes yellowing and unhinging his jaw: *HHHHHSSSSSKKKKKKKKKK*
|
|
#
?
Jul 19, 2018 16:20
|
|
- slowm
-
live slow, die whenevs
|
Instead of wiping front to back try figure eights or light dabbing effect.
|
|
#
?
Jul 20, 2018 15:20
|
|
- slowm
-
live slow, die whenevs
|
Telling your 4chan/Reddit friends you paid $10 dollars just to post on somethingawful.com the website, and then telling them avatars are extra.
|
|
#
?
Jul 20, 2018 15:27
|
|
- slowm
-
live slow, die whenevs
|
Someone whose erogenous zone is the pineal gland.
|
|
#
?
Jul 20, 2018 15:49
|
|
- ShinyBirdTeeth
-
sparkle sparkle sparkle
|
Telling your 4chan/Reddit friends you paid $10 dollars just to post on somethingawful.com the website, and then telling them avatars are extra.
Having 4chan friends
|
|
#
?
Jul 20, 2018 15:55
|
|
- slowm
-
live slow, die whenevs
|
Having friends
|
|
#
?
Jul 20, 2018 20:45
|
|
- ShinyBirdTeeth
-
sparkle sparkle sparkle
|
Friends are the worst *cuddles my plant Rooterick*
|
|
#
?
Jul 20, 2018 20:57
|
|
- ShinyBirdTeeth
-
sparkle sparkle sparkle
|
I'm not lonely," I say as I purchase .5 lbs of deli meat.
|
|
#
?
Jul 20, 2018 20:58
|
|
- ShinyBirdTeeth
-
sparkle sparkle sparkle
|
I always planned to grow up this way and tape googley eyes on my turtles.
|
|
#
?
Jul 20, 2018 20:58
|
|
- alnilam
-
|
People who listen to the gentle giant album "glass house" shouldn't get stoned
|
|
#
?
Jul 20, 2018 21:32
|
|
- Dorothy Lynch
-
|
The Metamorphosis except instead of waking up a bug, he wakes up with blackface he cant get off.
|
|
#
?
Jul 21, 2018 18:59
|
|
- DavidAlltheTime
-
All David...all the TIME!
|
People who listen to the gentle giant album "glass house" shouldn't get stoned
You can't tell me what to do!
|
|
#
?
Jul 21, 2018 19:03
|
|
- got any sevens
-
by Cyrano4747
|
The Metamorphosis except instead of waking up a bug, he wakes up with blackface he cant get off.
woke up thuggin'
----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
|
|
#
?
Jul 21, 2018 19:28
|
|
- cda
-
by Hand Knit
|
this is a good one, it shoudl be a thread
ok, enough time has passed and you didnt make the thread, so i'm going to
----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
|
|
#
?
Jul 21, 2018 19:47
|
|
- ShinyBirdTeeth
-
sparkle sparkle sparkle
|
An ice cream man, but for meat salads. Get you a cone of chicken salad. it has grapes in it!
|
|
#
?
Jul 21, 2018 20:06
|
|
- DragQueenofAngmar
-
You shall not pass!
|
An ice cream man, but for meat salads. Get you a cone of chicken salad. it has grapes in it!
a savory slice of ham, wrapped delicately around a quivering whipped tower of sumptuous mayonnaise
|
|
#
?
Jul 21, 2018 21:37
|
|
- Adbot
-
ADBOT LOVES YOU
|
|
|
#
?
May 11, 2024 05:08
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2018 13:12
Awesome winter sig by Symbolic, love it!
