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Non anon fesh - I've been ill and binged this whole thread in like a week. Thread title change was pretty hilarious.
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Jul 21, 2018 14:36
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Jul 21, 2018 14:38
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loquacius posted:prier Also yeah being unemployed sucks beyond the money part. Get a job, even if it's a lovely job. How middle of nowhere are we talking? Even just picking up a few hours at the local diner or something will give you a routine to settle into, which will help with everything else. The positive benefits of having a reliable reason to get up and get out of the house cannot be overstated. If it's completely not an option, get a project and work on it a little bit every day. Doesn't have to be anything big, doesn't have to be anything important, doesn't even have to be anything you can finish. Something that is explicitly stupid and useless may actually be better than something functional that you care about, because there's less pressure and intimidation.
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Jul 21, 2018 14:42
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Wedding goon - don't make a scene. Don't profess your love until you're the best version of you that you can be. Realistically you only get one chance and you don't want to gently caress it up by being a mess. Start taking care of yourself and lose that weight, by the time you get to 200lb~ you might have met someone on your weight loss journey or you might just completely move on from this girl. Even if this girl is a bad influence on you, making sure you're the best version of you before you profess your love and put yourself out there is the best idea.
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Jul 21, 2018 15:44
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Wedding Goon, please post again after you make a scene at the wedding and the groomsmen beat the poo poo out of you and the bride tells you to gently caress off to hell.
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Jul 21, 2018 15:47
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Waltzing Along posted:Wedding Goon, please post again after you make a scene at the wedding and the groomsmen beat the poo poo out of you and the bride tells you to gently caress off to hell. or this plz even i didnt explore that timeline
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Jul 21, 2018 15:50
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gently caress up the wedding fatty
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Jul 21, 2018 15:53
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HugeGrossBurrito posted:gently caress up the wedding fatty despite the general nature of the current title this would also make a swell thread title.
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Jul 21, 2018 15:54
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I've ran sound at a bunch of weddings and not once has anyone actually asked the audience if anyone has an objection
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Jul 21, 2018 15:56
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CheesyDog posted:I've ran sound at a bunch of weddings and not once has anyone actually asked the audience if anyone has an objection Yeah. I was thinking it is just something you see on TV.
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Jul 21, 2018 15:56
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i didnt have it in either of mine thats just asking for it.
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Jul 21, 2018 15:58
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Wedding goon, refer to thread title
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Jul 21, 2018 16:07
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The only actual jealous meltdown I've seen at one involved some brief, unclear shouting at the wedding party table during the reception and a guy storming out, but he couldn't actually leave because everyone was double-parked so he was still sitting sullenly in his car 40 minutes later
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Jul 21, 2018 16:08
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Overweight goon, try cutting your dick off. do it at the wedding, make it look like an accident. Slipped and fell in the kitchen sorta thing. Sue the caterer, get a big settlement, suddenly you have all this money and that’ll help you lose weight and better yourself
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Jul 21, 2018 16:11
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Just Cut Your loving Weight Off
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Jul 21, 2018 16:13
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He met her online, but I met her in an institution that places children of a similar age within a small geographic area together
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Jul 21, 2018 16:26
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Jul 21, 2018 16:29
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Waltzing Along posted:Yeah. I was thinking it is just something you see on TV. I understand that it's an archaic holdover from back before telephones or cars when it was plausible that the groom might already be married two towns over and nobody else knew about it, or the bride wasn't a virgin, or one was a heathen, or they were long-lost siblings, etc
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Jul 21, 2018 16:50
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Play a romantic trumpet solo in the middle of the wedding op
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Jul 21, 2018 16:57
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so many solid ideas itt
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Jul 21, 2018 16:59
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sticksy posted:Play a romantic trumpet solo in the middle of the wedding op
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Jul 21, 2018 17:01
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sticksy posted:Play a romantic trumpet solo in the middle of the wedding op If only they had played flugelhorn this could forever be known as “The Chuck Mangione Incident” and become part of the internet lore segment when VH1 has “I Remember the 2010s”. I will be filing this under missed golden opportunities. Your only hope is the solo from the Green Hornet.
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Jul 21, 2018 17:02
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That fat wedding goon is just going to be humiliated if he makes a scene. Everyone else will see some enormous fat dude telling a girl she is wrong for loving someone that isn't him just because he's been obsessed with her for decades. It's almost too much of a parody of the stereotypical "nice guy" to be believable. I can't believe there are still people who think that if you are "nice" to a girl for long enough she owes you anything on a romantic/sexual level. Also yeah everyone who has said a girl didn't bring out the best of you if you ballooned to 375 pounds and made you think the only way you could be with her is if she became a landwhale too and was forced to settle with you. Newsflash: your lack of self-confidence is exactly why she never viewed you as a romantic partner before even getting in to the physical aspect of it.
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Jul 21, 2018 17:31
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You work at Arby's, so you better be able to offer her all the beef and cheddar she can handle for the rest of her life. That's also a euphemism for humping your tubby body.
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Jul 21, 2018 19:04
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Make sure somebody films it. That way if it works out you have the video of when you professed your love to grandma to show your grandkids and if it doesn't you can put it on repeat on the TV in the room you hang yourself in. (But post it here first plz) (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
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Jul 21, 2018 21:06
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some of the replies to the wannabe wedding crasher are just mean and cruel, come on he's a dumb gently caress but still D-Pad posted:if it doesn't you can put it on repeat on the TV in the room you hang yourself in stuff like this isn't justified
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Jul 21, 2018 21:30
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necroid posted:some of the replies to the wannabe wedding crasher are just mean and cruel, come on welcome to gibbis
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Jul 21, 2018 21:38
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necroid posted:some of the replies to the wannabe wedding crasher are just mean and cruel, come on He is planning to ruin what should be the happiest moment in his supposed "friend"'s life because he thinks he put in more work to "get" her than her future husband. How is that not mean and cruel? He is not only ruining her wedding day, he's outing himself as an rear end in a top hat who can't take no for an answer and is coming to collect his debt of niceness tokens deposited into gril. Besides, the suggestion is totally unrealistic. Given how fat he is there's no way a simple rope is going to support his weight so hanging is out of the question.
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Jul 21, 2018 22:12
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yeah I eat rear end posted:Besides, the suggestion is totally unrealistic. Given how fat he is there's no way a simple rope is going to support his weight so hanging is out of the question. He could use the fly system of a local theatre.
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Jul 21, 2018 22:21
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It's Followup Sunday today in the feshthread! First up is Darkweb Goon: quote:Hey thread, thanks for the support. This one is a followup from someone identifying themselves as "the miserable marriage affair goon" which honestly is not specific enough in a thread like this but based on the permanent-residency comment I'm pretty sure it's the second one from this post. quote:To address the comments: Spoiler alert: she isn't Anyway, you're making progress from last time in that you're getting out of your marriage and you're not with your ex either, which are the two big points from my response, so that's good. I'm glad you're trying to move on with your life, too; don't be discouraged that it's not an instantaneous process. Keep forging ahead; this is as good a course of action as you can really take.
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Jul 22, 2018 18:13
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She's not your perfect woman. I don't know you, but you deserve better than that. Nobody deserves to be with a cheater, and nobody should think that's who they deserve to be with.
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Jul 22, 2018 19:07
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A big part of this thread for me is like going through my life being like “my problems... woe is me” and then I read fleshes about affaires and child abuse and child support and I’m like “nah I’ll stick with my problems, yikes”
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Jul 22, 2018 19:14
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or just more like "man. glad im not that stupid anymore"
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Jul 22, 2018 19:15
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CheesyDog posted:I've ran sound at a bunch of weddings and not once has anyone actually asked the audience if anyone has an objection I think it’s a U.K. legal requirement. But the phrase here is something like quote:if anyone has any reason why these two may not legally be wed
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Jul 22, 2018 22:04
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Bust Rodd posted:fleshes
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Jul 22, 2018 22:19
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Man I hope the FailWhale ruins that wedding.
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Jul 22, 2018 22:23
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He'll chicken out and sit there in silence. They don't actually even ask the question anymore in US weddings anyway.
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Jul 22, 2018 22:38
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He should practice ruin a few other people’s weddings first
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Jul 22, 2018 22:40
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Already ruined his parents'
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Jul 22, 2018 22:57
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Miserable marriage guy and his ex deserve each other so much. I'd love to read a dark web post. I know almost nothing about it, and don't want to commit any crimes, but it would be cool to read about other's exploits there.
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Jul 22, 2018 23:13
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