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ninjahedgehog
Feb 17, 2011

It's time to kick the tires and light the fires, Big Bird.


3 almost always, but I'll crank it up to 5 if I'm looking at a pretty bad regency.

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Ivan Shitskin
Nov 29, 2002

Crusader Kings II: A full playthrough of satanic lesbian rulers

Sticky Nate
Jan 9, 2012

finished my Ireland-Germany-Sicily-Greece playthrough. The O'Brien dynasty has inbred idiots on most of the thrones in Europe, and I got bored at the end and converted to Buddhism. Cath rules everything around me.

ElGroucho
Nov 1, 2005

We already - What about sticking our middle fingers up... That was insane
Fun Shoe
Help

I can't stop playing as the Irish

Orv
May 4, 2011

ElGroucho posted:

Help

I can't stop playing as the Irish

The first step is admitting you have a problem.

The second step is playing some Zoroastrians.

chaosapiant
Oct 10, 2012

White Line Fever

Ok, so i'll try full speed ahead mode tonite when I play. Game is overwhelming but it looks like it kinda just plays it self in a way with you guiding what's happening? I want to be like every cool King Robert and get rich, bang whores, and take over land.

Orv
May 4, 2011

chaosapiant posted:

Ok, so i'll try full speed ahead mode tonite when I play. Game is overwhelming but it looks like it kinda just plays it self in a way with you guiding what's happening? I want to be like every cool King Robert and get rich, bang whores, and take over land.

Basically the only time you're not bouncing from one event to the next you can typically set up something to ensure that you won't miss critical points in your various machinations. The keep on eye on this person button is good and you should use it.

Dwesa
Jul 19, 2016

Maybe I'll go where I can see stars

Orv posted:

The second step is playing some Zoroastrians.
ew

Orv
May 4, 2011

What I should recommend Semien?

Ms Adequate
Oct 30, 2011

Baby even when I'm dead and gone
You will always be my only one, my only one
When the night is calling
No matter who I become
You will always be my only one, my only one, my only one
When the night is calling



The Bold Kobold posted:

Honestly, unless I'm trying to time armies to arrive at the same day or slowing down/pausing to focus on something, I'm always on speed 5.

:yeah: :same:

Tuxedo Catfish
Mar 17, 2007

You've got guts! Come to my village, I'll buy you lunch.
I rarely go past speed 3 unless I'm in a war where I have outrageous superiority but can't get anything done till the war is over.

Crow Jane
Oct 18, 2012

nothin' wrong with a lady drinkin' alone in her room
Top speed all the way.

chaosapiant
Oct 10, 2012

White Line Fever

Is there a Goon Discord for either CK2 or Paradox grand strategy in general?

Sticky Nate
Jan 9, 2012

speed 3 for the first ten years or during wartime. speed 5 for the rest.

Honky Dong Country
Feb 11, 2015

chaosapiant posted:

Is there a Goon Discord for either CK2 or Paradox grand strategy in general?

Not that I've seen. Might be able to get whoever runs the SA server to set one up though.

Dwesa
Jul 19, 2016

Maybe I'll go where I can see stars

Orv posted:

What I should recommend Semien?
No, I just remembered all those inbred babies.

Orv
May 4, 2011

Dwesa posted:

No, I just remembered all those inbred babies.

It's not ideal but I figure it's a (not really) middle ground between pushing out of the nest and pushing out of the nest into the Marianas Trench with concrete shoes.

Honky Dong Country
Feb 11, 2015

That's why as a Zoro you marry a relative past child bearing age and breed through concubines.

GO FUCK YOURSELF
Aug 19, 2004

"I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who beat you, and pray for them to beat the shit out of the Buckeyes" - The Book of Witten

Honky Dong Country posted:

Not that I've seen. Might be able to get whoever runs the SA server to set one up though.

https://discord.gg/RS9fJgV

Mr. Fall Down Terror
Jan 24, 2018

by Fluffdaddy

ElGroucho posted:

Help

I can't stop playing as the Irish

install after the end :twisted:

Main Paineframe
Oct 27, 2010
I usually run on speed 4 or 5, occasionally bumping it down to 3 if I'm in a micro-heavy war. If I actually want to do anything even remotely time-critical, I pause the clock to take care of it, so if the clock is moving at all then it's because there isn't anything I want to do right now. I tweak my notification settings so that anything I'm likely to be interested in will pause the clock, too.

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Honky Dong Country posted:

That's why as a Zoro you marry a relative past child bearing age and breed through concubines.

The Mark of Zoro makes you mainly immune to inbreeding penalties, doesn't it?

Dwesa
Jul 19, 2016

Maybe I'll go where I can see stars

Jedit posted:

The Mark of Zoro makes you mainly immune to inbreeding penalties, doesn't it?
afaik, Paradox developer confirmed that Zoros don't have any immunity to inbreeding mentioned in code

Edit: Holy Fury looks really good so far.

Dwesa fucked around with this message at 13:17 on Jul 27, 2018

Goon Danton
May 24, 2012

Don't forget to show my shitposts to the people. They're well worth seeing.

New Dev Diary just got posted, about the "special" crusades: Children's, Shepard's, and Fourth.

https://pdxint.at/2LFDsVf

Torrannor
Apr 27, 2013

---FAGNER---
TEAM-MATE
Once I get around to play the Byzantines in Holy Fury, I will try to blind every doge of Venice!

Dwesa
Jul 19, 2016

Maybe I'll go where I can see stars

Torrannor posted:

Once I get around to play the Byzantines in Holy Fury, I will try to blind every doge of Venice!
It couldn't stop Enrico Dandolo though.

ElGroucho
Nov 1, 2005

We already - What about sticking our middle fingers up... That was insane
Fun Shoe
I need my slut wife to get to work cucking me, because my current ruler seems to be impotent

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

ElGroucho posted:

I need my slut wife to get to work cucking me, because my current ruler seems to be impotent

To Play Crusader Kings is a cuck book!

DisgracelandUSA
Aug 11, 2011

Yeah, I gets down with the homies

ElGroucho posted:

I need my slut wife to get to work cucking me, because my current ruler seems to be impotent

Just throw an old fashioned gang bang by bribing a bunch of lustful Chads to your court and you'll have an heir in no time!

Crow Jane
Oct 18, 2012

nothin' wrong with a lady drinkin' alone in her room
I've had my court doctor offer me fertility treatments once or twice, but that seems to be a rare-ish event

Devo
Jul 9, 2001

:siren:Caught Cubs Posting:siren:

Crow Jane posted:

I've had my court doctor offer me fertility treatments once or twice, but that seems to be a rare-ish event

Mine always seems to offer them to me like right after I turn 16 and I'm not worried about it yet. The one time I said yes I'm pretty sure my dick fell off or something.

Azhais
Feb 5, 2007
Switchblade Switcharoo

Devo posted:

Mine always seems to offer them to me like right after I turn 16 and I'm not worried about it yet. The one time I said yes I'm pretty sure my dick fell off or something.

That only happens to me when I ask him for a gout treatment

Randarkman
Jul 18, 2011

Sadly no Albigensian Crusade it seems. Would be a pretty cool event chain to have. It could target a region (kingdom or duchy?) with high heresy and call a crusade on it. Best if it actually served the purpose of the real life Albigensian Crusade which was extending the real control and power of the king of France to the south. So maybe for the event to fire it would have to target a kingdom tier title ruled by a character whose capital is not in the kingdom and which as at least a couple of heretic provinces. When the Crusade begins the rulers in this region secedes and one of them, preferably a heretic is given a temporary title. Upon Crusade success Catholicism gains a boost to moral authority and converts at least 1 heretic county in the target region, the king imprisons all enemy heretic vassals and can gains revoke reason, and the kingdom the crusade was declared against is destroyed and becomes dejure land of the king's primary title (maybe also raise crown authority if it was previously lower than high). Furthermore the land is devastated and all participants gain plunder. Upon loss the heretics secede and Catholicism suffers a big hit to moral authority.

Something like that, it'd be somewhat circumstantial (an independent heretic realm could have a normal crusade called against it I assume, so no use for a special event chain there), but cool and flavorful.

I also really feel like many heresies, particularly Catharism, should be modelled as underground societies in addition to being heretic religions, the first step for a character joining the society would be to secretly convert to catharism, thus you have an actual conspiracy. Maybe make it only possible to join the society if you have a Cathar character in your court or you hold a Cathar county or a county with a special modifier. That could help to make it more regionally focused. Catharism essentially operated as a secret societies with doctrine and dogma being revealed as one progressed IIRC.

Randarkman fucked around with this message at 18:34 on Jul 27, 2018

Elias_Maluco
Aug 23, 2007
I need to sleep
This DLC is the first CK2 DLC to get me really excited since conclave

Ivan Shitskin
Nov 29, 2002

I've been playing a game as the Ottomans in the 1337 start date. Almost right away, a jihad was called against Portugal, and then a few years in, before the Muslim armies made much progress, a crusade was called on Jerusalem. Crusader armies gradually filtered into the holy land and almost won the war while the Muslims were scattered and distracted from the jihad. Portugal was taken with almost no resistance, and when the Muslim armies began returning home from the jihad, and big battles started flaring up in the holy land, the black death suddenly swept through and caused a hilarious clusterfuck orgy of death and destruction, right at the height of the crusade.

For a while, the biggest Christian army was actually outrunning the black death as it headed south. Eventually the plague and the Muslims caught up to it and decimated it in a long series of battles right on the frontier of the black death, right next to Jerusalem. The Christians were eventually ground to a halt, but both sides were devastated by the plague. The Christians had a very high war score, and it took many years to grind it back down again, and I watched countless thousands more crusaders march through my lands on the way to their deaths in the plague-hellscape holy land. The pope eventually called off the crusade in a white peace. All that death and devastation for nothing. The most metal crusade I've seen in this game. :black101:

Strudel Man
May 19, 2003
ROME DID NOT HAVE ROBOTS, FUCKWIT

Dwesa posted:

afaik, Paradox developer confirmed that Zoros don't have any immunity to inbreeding mentioned in code

Edit: Holy Fury looks really good so far.
Yeah. They ought to fix that, but they probably won't. Only the mod-used "divine blood" dynasty attribute has an effect there.

Roland Jones
Aug 18, 2011

by Nyc_Tattoo
I think that might have been added so the GoT mod could use it for the Targaryens, rather than planning to use it themselves, since presumably it was easy for them but would have been less so for modders.

Mantis42
Jul 26, 2010
Probation
Can't post for 6 hours!
Unpopular opinion: You shouldn't gently caress your sister.

Tuxedo Catfish
Mar 17, 2007

You've got guts! Come to my village, I'll buy you lunch.

Mantis42 posted:

Unpopular opinion: You shouldn't gently caress your sister.

Yeah, that's an inefficient use of dynasty assets. Use your sister to form alliances, marry your mother.

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Randarkman
Jul 18, 2011

Strudel Man posted:

Yeah. They ought to fix that, but they probably won't. Only the mod-used "divine blood" dynasty attribute has an effect there.

Why should Zoroastrians be immune to in-breeding? They can breed non-malformed kids with their concubines.

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