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Azza Bamboo
Apr 7, 2018


THUNDERDOME LOSER 2021
What?!

I haven't been on these forums long and I'm not sure I want to stay after hearing this.

But I need to get my moneys worth goddamnit.

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VanSandman
Feb 16, 2011
SWAP.AVI EXCHANGER
Can’t a pilonoidal cyst turn into a second rear end in a top hat?

bob dobbs is dead
Oct 8, 2017

I love peeps
Nap Ghost

Azza Bamboo posted:

What?!

I haven't been on these forums long and I'm not sure I want to stay after hearing this.

But I need to get my moneys worth goddamnit.

a new user?

an actual goddamn new user to sa in tyool 2018?

Solice Kirsk
Jun 1, 2004

.

bob dobbs is dead posted:

a new user?

an actual goddamn new user to sa in tyool 2018?

Already has an anime avatar. Classic rereg move.

wesleywillis
Dec 30, 2016

SUCK A MALE CAMEL'S DICK WITH MIRACLE WHIP!!
I'm a rereg too. But I'm from 2016. No anime avs for me.

McSpanky
Jan 16, 2005






Solice Kirsk posted:

Remember that goon that told the story about how he would wipe the sweat/discharge off of his pilonidal cyst and wiped it on his bedpost all the time and sent the picture of the bedpost and it was this weird discolored streak? Think that was in one of the bachelor threads.

Unfortunately.

A psychologist of strong stomach could make a case study, there appears to be a trend.

TehRedWheelbarrow
Mar 16, 2011



Fan of Britches
:psyduck:

new people? whaaat?

kalel
Jun 19, 2012

haha, oh man, I really love that a radioactive meteor gave me the power to just erase mental images from my mind. absolutely great, just fantastic, to not have to remember reading gross poo poo about the human body ever

...which is what I would say if I could do that

bell jar
Feb 25, 2009

just pick up a trendy alcohol habit

Azza Bamboo
Apr 7, 2018


THUNDERDOME LOSER 2021
Bad memories are stored in the dick.

SniperWoreConverse
Mar 20, 2010



Gun Saliva

yeah I eat rear end posted:

you better not be trying to get in on this. I've worked hard to become the world's premiere eater of rear end and I won't let an amateur like you encroach on my territory.

See, this is bullshit. No love for the art. You think goatse has this attitude? No. He's been the top player in his field for decades, but he does it knowing one day he will be surpassed


VanSandman posted:

Can’t a pilonoidal cyst turn into a second rear end in a top hat?

Yes

crazy cloud
Nov 7, 2012

by Cyrano4747
Lipstick Apathy

loquacius posted:

"smh" is an acronym which in this case stands for "sever my hog"

Bees on Wheat
Jul 18, 2007

I've never been happy



QUAIL DIVISION
Buglord

wesleywillis posted:

That wasn't the same guy that used a shop vac to suck the poo poo out of his taint boil was it?

Pretty sure leaky rear end guy and taint boil guy were two different posters, but here have this anyway:

scapulataf posted:

Bachelor? Yeah, maybe.
Disgusting?? Oh gently caress yeah.

I've had a boil on my taint for a few days and its been bugging the gently caress out of me. It hurt to sit, it hurt to poo poo, it hurt to do a lot of things.

I tried scrubbing the area with alcohol, and then poking a pin through it, but it wasn't working. First squatting over a mirror and then propping the mirror up on a hamper full of dirty laundry.
I tried the boiling bottle technique, but I don't think I was patient enough.

So, today I had a great idea. I got out the antiseptics, and disinfectants, and the alcohol, and the vacuum. Its a Hoover wind tunnel since someone will ask.

The first shot I didn't quite get it centred where I wanted it but it was still over the mark. Even though it was on that spot for maybe half a second there was still evil juices flowing from my taint. When I got it centred properly, and left it for several seconds I could practically feel the magic as the juices were flowing from my body and into the vacuum hose, coating the inside of it. I'm going to have a hard time making my vacuum not look like a crime scene. But relief is upon me!!

Theophany
Jul 22, 2014

SUCCHIAMI IL MIO CAZZO DA DIETRO, RANA RAGAZZO



2022 FIA Formula 1 WDC

Bees on Wheat posted:

Pretty sure leaky rear end guy and taint boil guy were two different posters, but here have this anyway:

:eyepop:

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO
Feb 28, 1985


Any links to that goon depravity?

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.

Solice Kirsk posted:

Already has an anime avatar. Classic rereg move.

Steven Universe is... actually pretty drat anime. And gay. Gaynime.

Sally
Jan 9, 2007


Don't post Small Dash!

Solice Kirsk posted:

Remember that goon that told the story about how he would wipe the sweat/discharge off of his pilonidal cyst and wiped it on his bedpost all the time and sent the picture of the bedpost and it was this weird discolored streak? Think that was in one of the bachelor threads.

what the gently caress now i have this image in my head you bastard no i dont want to remember it

fins
May 31, 2011

Floss Finder

loquacius posted:

yikes

I might have missed that post in the r/r thread, so I can't link it, sorry


gross

found it, for consanguinamory is a phrase that isnt easy to forget (regardless of how much you try!)


Caganer posted:

Looks like the real gold is in /r/legaladvice:

Cps allegations(self.legaladvice)


The comments are gold:


The OP also posts in /r/consanguinamory:

Beefed Owl
Sep 13, 2007

Come at me scrub-lord I'm ripped!

Ghost Leviathan posted:

Steven Universe is... actually pretty drat anime. And gay. Gaynime.

So in other words... anime

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

Warning, this one is kind of similar to the last one in that it's someone who is way into their own butt in a slightly different way than usual

quote:

I am a sweaty cyclist. When I've been riding for a while my butt gets this itch. It isn't on the cheek, it's on the sides of the buttcrack just above the poophole. It's right in the sides of the valley. When I scratch this itch it feels amazing. It's sensational.

My confession is that I spend a lot of time imagining what it'd be like to have someone else scratch my butt. I mean, if I'm jerking myself off then I know exactly how it's going to happen, but if someone else does it it feels so much better. This would be the same. I just want someone to scratch my rear end for me. I think it'd be really hot. If I could just find someone who has fingernails and get them to claw in there, I think that'd do it for me.

quote:

I took 2 days off work to play monster hunter world

I've been waiting years for this

see y'all later nerds

I feel like I could have just paraphrased this one but the actual fesh itself wasn't much longer so I just posted it

coolskull
Nov 11, 2007

the answer for both of those people is “craigslist”.

Anne Whateley
Feb 11, 2007
:unsmith: i like nice words
Craigslist took all that poo poo down months back because of SESTA/FOSTA :rip:

Question Time
Sep 12, 2010



I don't understand all the excitement about monster hunter world. I guess it just released on PC, but was on PS4 for months beforehand? If you can afford a PC that can run it, and you're very excited about it, why not just get a PS4 and play it there months ago?

yeah I eat ass
Mar 14, 2005

only people who enjoy my posting can replace this avatar
I don't even know what monster hunter world is. I have taken over a week off (unannounced and unexplained to anyone, I just didn't go) to play hearthstone so I can't judge though.

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

Butt Discussin posted:

I don't understand all the excitement about monster hunter world. I guess it just released on PC, but was on PS4 for months beforehand? If you can afford a PC that can run it, and you're very excited about it, why not just get a PS4 and play it there months ago?

A certain kind of game is always better on PC because you can mod PC games; dunno if this is one of them

Monster Hunter World has kind of been on the edges of my radar for a while but honestly I bought like three PS4 games with my console last Black Friday and I'm still not done with the third one yet

Not a Children
Oct 9, 2012

Don't need a holster if you never stop shooting.

Butt Discussin posted:

I don't understand all the excitement about monster hunter world. I guess it just released on PC, but was on PS4 for months beforehand? If you can afford a PC that can run it, and you're very excited about it, why not just get a PS4 and play it there months ago?

Not everyone wants to spend $250 on top of the $1k they already spent on a pc in order to play a game half a year earlier

Elentor
Dec 14, 2004

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Butt Discussin posted:

I don't understand all the excitement about monster hunter world. I guess it just released on PC, but was on PS4 for months beforehand? If you can afford a PC that can run it, and you're very excited about it, why not just get a PS4 and play it there months ago?

Let me see, I can buy a new PS4 for R$1,979
And then MHW for a PS4 for R$149

For a total of R$ 2,128, which is twice as much the minimum wage for 2 months work.

Or I can buy it for R$129 on the steam store, which will probably look better for 6% the value.

I can pay over 16 times more to play a game that will run worse on a console, or just wait a few months. MHW looks fun and exciting but not five hundred dollars worth of fun and excitement.

Elentor fucked around with this message at 16:51 on Aug 10, 2018

Miserable Maid
Apr 22, 2010

:minnie: Cat Army :minnie:
What hosed up country are you from where a PS4 and game cost two months pay

Elentor
Dec 14, 2004

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Welcome to Brazil, where cars are a life investment and game consoles costs are laughably high.

Edit: Also there are apparently only 3 places in the world where a hamburger costs more than here.

Question Time
Sep 12, 2010



Sure, for most people waiting would be fine. But I've seen several posts where people are really, really excited. If you're excited enough to take multiple days off work, I would think you'd be excited enough to spend more. I guess if you're the right combination of poor and nerdy, though, always waiting for PC might be the best balance.

Blaze Dragon
Aug 28, 2013
LOWTAX'S SPINE FUND

Miserable Maid posted:

What hosed up country are you from where a PS4 and game cost two months pay

This will be shocking to you, I'm sure, but the moment you leave the first world quality of life goes down the shitter. I'm from Brazil's neighbour Argentina and it's just as bad here, stuff is just impossibly expensive and only gets worse.

Stevie Lee
Oct 8, 2007
god bless america :smugdon:

kill me

Son of Man
Jan 29, 2003

by Azathoth

Stevie Lee posted:

god bless america :smugdon:

kill me

trump's execution squad is on its way! thank you for using our service!

PetraCore
Jul 20, 2017

👁️🔥👁️👁️👁️BE NOT👄AFRAID👁️👁️👁️🔥👁️

bob dobbs is dead posted:

a new user?

an actual goddamn new user to sa in tyool 2018?
Hey, I joined for real in 2017.

Hauki
May 11, 2010


Blaze Dragon posted:

This will be shocking to you, I'm sure, but the moment you leave the first world quality of life goes down the shitter. I'm from Brazil's neighbour Argentina and it's just as bad here, stuff is just impossibly expensive and only gets worse.

I’m not particularly shocked, but I am puzzled at the relative economy of pc vs. console there. A decent gaming pc here literally cost me 3-4 times what a PS4 pro would, and that’s just buying components and building it myself, no software, no peripherals. Sure, PC games on average are cheaper given sales and such, but it would take a lot of game purchases for that initial overhead to pay off.

bob dobbs is dead
Oct 8, 2017

I love peeps
Nap Ghost

PetraCore posted:

Hey, I joined for real in 2017.

i took a 9 year break before returning in 2015

kalel
Jun 19, 2012

bob dobbs is dead posted:

i took a 9 year break before returning in 2015

we're glad to have you back

kalel fucked around with this message at 14:44 on Aug 11, 2018

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

Just the one today

quote:

7 years ago, I graduated college and moved home. I was super depressed, living with my parents, and in an emotionally abusive relationship. My parents suggested I get connected with a pretty open-minded local church with a lot of young singles, so I did just that.

I went to the gatherings they held on Thursday nights pretty consistently and got pretty well connected. Usually we drank a ton of beer, ate a ton of good food, and shot the poo poo for the evening.

After a few months of these gatherings, several of the guys were dipping out on the front porch. After a few beers, they asked me if I had ever dipped, and I said no. Basically, they coaxed me into trying it, and, never having used any tobacco before, I tried it. The head rush was amazing. Closest thing to a high I have ever experienced. Went home, didn’t think anything of it until a year later when I was living in my own place.

I started drinking a couple beers (graduating to a forty or two) while I was playing WoW and TF2, then punctuating the night by putting a few pouches of Grizzly in. Eventually that wasn’t enough, and, a few months later, I was stuffing my mouth with two cans’ worth of Grizzly. I would run to the bathroom and spit it all out within 5 min or so. The “high” was worth it all, though.

Fast forward to today— I have been doing his about once a night for the last few years. I limited myself to one can instead of two after two 24oz cans of malt liquors. I’m now happily married, have two kids, and a decent job. I’m not sure how much longer I’ll be able to keep it up— my wife caught me doing this pretty early on in the marriage (leading to about a year in which I abstained from using Grizzly).

I have come to terms with the fact that this is a ridiculous habit and that eventually it’s going to catch up with me. It’s basically turned into two hours of stress release punctuated by 5 minutes of nicotine high. Even though I’m only keeping the Grizzly in for a few minutes per night, I’m scared I’m going to get mouth cancer, but I’m having trouble kicking the habit since it’s tied to the way I have been functioning and coping with my depression— not to mention the nostalgia associated with the games I’ve been playing for the last seven years.

TL;DR I’m a stupid idiot who is drinking copious amounts of Hurricane and poisoning my mouth with Grizzly five minutes a night.

"It helps with my depression" is not a good reason to continue substance abuse. You've got to find a more healthy coping mechanism that's not killing you.

Solice Kirsk
Jun 1, 2004

.
Yeah, go to a psychiatrist and get prescribed substances to help with your depression.

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Azza Bamboo
Apr 7, 2018


THUNDERDOME LOSER 2021
I've seen too many of my relatives drink and smoke themselves into an early grave, or worse, prolonged suffering for everyone.

Please get help.

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