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Splicer
Oct 16, 2006

from hell's heart I cast at thee
🧙🐀🧹🌙🪄🐸

loquacius posted:

Just the one today


"It helps with my depression" is not a good reason to continue substance abuse. You've got to find a more healthy coping mechanism that's not killing you.
Have you considered getting actual depression medication?

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sugar free jazz
Mar 5, 2008

Grizzly goon, try cutting your dick off. It would be both healthier and less gross than dipping

Saeku
Sep 22, 2010
See a psychiatrist AND/OR talk to your GP about nicotine replacements.

McSpanky
Jan 16, 2005






sugar free jazz posted:

Grizzly goon, try cutting your dick off. It would be both healthier and less gross than dipping

Cut your dick off and then dip that

A_Bug_That_Thinks
Mar 16, 2011


ASK ME ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE BIG SAGGY POKEMON TITS
Just use snus

Leave
Feb 7, 2012

Taking the term "Koopaling" to a whole new level since 2016.
Cut open one of your balls and put your dip in there. You'll lose pee storage, but nobody can see your filthy habit.

Sagebrush
Feb 26, 2012

get one of those juul things the kids are all about these days. at least then you won't be giving yourself cancer, probably

Son of Man
Jan 29, 2003

by Azathoth
hurricane is an 8 or 10% abv malt liquor, so drinking two 40s in two hours every night is pretty drat heavy. get help if you need it. there's no shame in being an alcoholic, this world is a gay hell toilet.


that's a weird way to dip tho , never heard of anyone doing that. switch to smoking?

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

This is one of the rare scenarios where "switch to smoking" is good advice

Hell, honestly, if it's about the high, switch to weed, you can vape it and you don't need to literally stuff your head full of carcinogens to feel anything from it even if you do it a lot

yeah I eat ass
Mar 14, 2005

only people who enjoy my posting can replace this avatar

Son of Man posted:

hurricane is an 8 or 10% abv malt liquor, so drinking two 40s in two hours every night is pretty drat heavy. get help if you need it. there's no shame in being an alcoholic, this world is a gay hell toilet.


I think it says something about me that I consider that to be barely a warmup and if I stopped there I would wake up feeling as if I had a sober night.

spookykid
Apr 28, 2006

I am an awkward fellow
after all

Son of Man posted:

hurricane is an 8 or 10% abv malt liquor, so drinking two 40s in two hours every night is pretty drat heavy.

24oz=! 40oz

HugeGrossBurrito
Mar 20, 2018

Dannywilson posted:

24oz=! 40oz

you have a sweet av man

Bust Rodd
Oct 21, 2008

by VideoGames
Once I had really dope sex with this creepy woman who did a lot of chew. Afterwards my lips, my nipples, my dick... basically anything she put her mouth on was buzzing, like a low grade ginseng/icy-hot sort of thing and I was halfway back home, freaking the gently caress out in my car that I caught some new kind of full body burning sensation STD when I realized it was the loving menthol in her gross chew tobacco.

Modus Pwnens
Dec 29, 2004
I don't smoke weed at all. Smoke weed.

Son of Man
Jan 29, 2003

by Azathoth

Bust Rodd posted:

Once I had really dope sex with this creepy woman who did a lot of chew. Afterwards my lips, my nipples, my dick... basically anything she put her mouth on was buzzing, like a low grade ginseng/icy-hot sort of thing and I was halfway back home, freaking the gently caress out in my car that I caught some new kind of full body burning sensation STD when I realized it was the loving menthol in her gross chew tobacco.

these are supposed to be anonymous!

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.

Hauki posted:

I’m not particularly shocked, but I am puzzled at the relative economy of pc vs. console there. A decent gaming pc here literally cost me 3-4 times what a PS4 pro would, and that’s just buying components and building it myself, no software, no peripherals. Sure, PC games on average are cheaper given sales and such, but it would take a lot of game purchases for that initial overhead to pay off.

Brazil has insane tariffs on imported electronics iirc, trying to encourage domestic industry. It's why Sega's been making Master Systems or something there for decades after they were discontinued elsewhere, and Brazillians are infamously common on free-to-play online games. It's cheaper to go on a trip to the US and buy games there for some people.

Also, the missing piece of the puzzle you're looking for is :filez:

wesleywillis
Dec 30, 2016

SUCK A MALE CAMEL'S DICK WITH MIRACLE WHIP!!

yeah I eat rear end posted:

I think it says something about me that I consider that to be barely a warmup and if I stopped there I would wake up feeling as if I had a sober night.

How sober or drunk do you have to be to eat rear end?
Is it something you started doing when drunk and then you began doing it sober?
Is it better drunk or sober?
Do you have a particular drink of choice before you do it?
Do you eat rear end on the first date?

burial
Sep 13, 2002

actually, that won't be necessary.

wesleywillis posted:

How sober or drunk do you have to be to eat rear end?
Is it something you started doing when drunk and then you began doing it sober?
Is it better drunk or sober?
Do you have a particular drink of choice before you do it?
Do you eat rear end on the first date?

These are all good questions, but a gentleman doesn’t eat rear end and tell.

So let’s see those answers?

Bust Rodd
Oct 21, 2008

by VideoGames

wesleywillis posted:

How sober or drunk do you have to be to eat rear end?
Is it something you started doing when drunk and then you began doing it sober?
Is it better drunk or sober?
Do you have a particular drink of choice before you do it?
Do you eat rear end on the first date?

2-3 drinks, or rolling on E or Meth
Yes
Drunk, a lot
Tequila or a rum & coke
Bitch I’ll do anything on the first date that doesn’t require diapers or bandages.

wesleywillis
Dec 30, 2016

SUCK A MALE CAMEL'S DICK WITH MIRACLE WHIP!!
Well..... I was specifically asking user yeah I eat rear end, but if anyone else wants to answer, I guess its ok.

I just figured since he's the foremost goon authority on the subject, I'd see what his criteria are.

Leave
Feb 7, 2012

Taking the term "Koopaling" to a whole new level since 2016.
I don't know if he'll reveal his secrets so easily. He's like the final boss of eating rear end, so you've probably got a lot more to do before you can even hear about his rear end eating technique.

wesleywillis
Dec 30, 2016

SUCK A MALE CAMEL'S DICK WITH MIRACLE WHIP!!
Whoa now, I'm not asking for techniques. I'd never ask a magician to reveal his secrets. I just am looking at how drunk/ what kind of drinks etc....

He is of course, free to answer only the questions he feels comfortable with.

yeah I eat ass
Mar 14, 2005

only people who enjoy my posting can replace this avatar

wesleywillis posted:

How sober or drunk do you have to be to eat rear end?
Is it something you started doing when drunk and then you began doing it sober?
Is it better drunk or sober?
Do you have a particular drink of choice before you do it?
Do you eat rear end on the first date?

I will not reveal my trade secrets.

The only one I will answer is the last one - I will not eat rear end until marriage, as decreed by the lord.

bell jar
Feb 25, 2009

I bought MHW for PS4 and then, also, just bought it on PC. Because it's a good game and I want G-Rank :colbert:

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

quote:

Hello anonymous thread person, I'm sure people called fake before on me but I don't really care anymore.

I sent you an email some time ago, it feels like. I was the guy taking care of his stage four mother and contemplating just suiciding after fulfilling her burial wishes since I was ill myself. As things turned out, she didn't really last that much longer after I sent that and my idiot brother accidentally killed himself on a mix of drugs and alcohol not much later. Glorious me, the executor of two estates! I ended up having them both cremated and spread their ashes down in the Caribbean since...whatever at that point. But, since I literally had nothing left I spent some time just wanting to experience some new things while doing the morbid thought stuff and drinking heavily. I met someone who was on a cruise and things went eerily well, and kind of quick. We exchanged information after a few days, since her cruise was leaving and we talked a great deal for several weeks and all that jazz.

Basically, its dumb but I thought I would just throw you some of the good news since I was in a terrible place before. I'm now married to a lovely and successful German woman I'm infatuated with and between what I ended up with after liquidating everything and what I could con out of the state to carry me through initiation of treatment (and doing all the paperwork for foreign spouses and settling with/into the healthcare system) I am, I'm told at least, in remission. Kind of broke the bank, but I still have some funds. We're back in the states right now because she wanted to meet my godparents, since they're the only (formerly? My spouse has four siblings and at least a dozen cousins I've met which is strange to inherit) relatives I really have now. Military service kept them from my small wedding, but they wouldn't have been happy to see how terrible I looked at that point anyway.

The worst part is really getting through the language at this point. I guess I shouldn't have taken French, huh? At least the countryside is nice and her parents are mildly obsessed with fattening me back up between language lessons. Hopefully My mother would be happy for me.

Aw, glad to know you've turned things around :unsmith: German is kind of a bitch to learn, but you've got a good reason for it, congrats

quote:

My wife recently hosted a bachelorette party and picked up several cases of wine coolers for the girls. After the party ended we had 20 wine coolers left in the house. Curious, I drank one.

It was delicious - called Jamaican Me Crazy. I drank 5 that evening and finished all 20 by the middle of that following week.

I have started drinking nothing but wine coolers since then. One in the morning before work, one at lunch that I sneak in my bag and drink in the car, 2 at home before my wife gets home. They help me relax and feel like I’m on a tropical vacation from my life, which is not great right now.

I realize they have very little alcohol in them. But I still feel the beast awakening in me, the monster known as addiction. I had an addiction to online gaming in my 20s and this feels exactly the same. Drinking to relieve stress, to escape from reality. Drinking before sex to help relax and get in the mood. Drinking at work to handle the day.

The depressing part is how “girly” the drinks are, and yes I’ve seen that Kids in the Hall skit.

For some reason I have too (despite having seen basically no others) and I thought of it immediately, linking for the thread

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8C4TGGtPzBU

it is basically this confession on the nose, yeah

tactlessbastard
Feb 4, 2001

Godspeed, post
Fun Shoe
Lmao get a real addiction, chump

The Walrus
Jul 9, 2002

by Fluffdaddy
sugar is a real addiction

kalel
Jun 19, 2012

I'm glad the guy who lost his family found love, and I'm also glad he's in remission

The wine cooler guy, though? He can just get the fudge outta here

Son of Man
Jan 29, 2003

by Azathoth
wine is fine but liquor is quicker

Nocheez
Sep 5, 2000

Can you spare a little cheddar?
Nap Ghost

Son of Man posted:

wine is fine but liquor is quicker

Candy is dandy, Mr. Nash.

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

quote:

I’m a foot fetishist.

I’ve stolen shoes and socks from many places. Just this weekend I stole several flip flops from a women’s softball league tournament happening in my local park. These girls just leave their precious shoes out for anyone to grab, so long as you’re stealthy enough.

I have ruined multiple relationships because, during sex, I can only focus on feet and refuse to ejaculate anywhere but ON the feet. I understand this is odd but please see from my perspective.

Tonight I plan to do my regular Monday night event, stealing socks and shoes from the fitting rooms at Old Navy. So many cute teen girls, so many fragrant socks. So much spilled semen lol.

why do so many of these guys steal people's poo poo

Like, this is definitely far from the first "I literally steal footwear so I can jerk off with it" fesh we've gotten and my response as usual is "why can't you weirdos just look at Internet pictures like everybody else"

quote:

Hey Loq,

This is probably the worst confession in the entire thread and I'm sorry for what I am about to write.






Whenever we go out to eat by ourselves, my boyfriend and I sit on the SAME SIDE OF THE TABLE.

Sincerely,
A Bad Person

:monocle:

No but seriously my wife and I do this whenever we're seated at a table that was obviously designed for four, and one time we went to a fancy restaurant where all the two-person tables were designed to be sat at like this, it's a pro move

P-Mack
Nov 10, 2007

What a sick twisted freak, wanting to converse with your spouse at a normal volume.

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO
Feb 28, 1985


loquacius posted:

I understand this is odd but please see from my perspective.
No

Cnidario
Mar 22, 2013

I gagged at the word ‘fragrant’

William Henry Hairytaint
Oct 29, 2011



Reminds me of another foot guy, it may have been in this very thread, that said managing to snag the shoe of a little girl was like "finding a truffle". Foot fetish dudes are weird, it's like they're trying to make up for having such a tame turn on.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.
Sounds like their equivalent of panty-stealing. At that point it isn't really about the feet. Trophies as a substitute for intimacy?

PetraCore
Jul 20, 2017

👁️🔥👁️👁️👁️BE NOT👄AFRAID👁️👁️👁️🔥👁️

Nothing wrong with foot fetish but everything wrong with stealing people's shoes to wank in and everything SUPER wrong with specifically targeting teenagers. Congrats on being a serial sexual predator, dude.

Azza Bamboo
Apr 7, 2018


THUNDERDOME LOSER 2021

quote:

refuse to ejaculate anywhere but ON the feet

Is this a voluntary refusal or does your dick not fire unless it's pointing at the feet?

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

Azza Bamboo posted:

Is this a voluntary refusal or does your dick not fire unless it's pointing at the feet?

it's a funnier image than I initially gave it credit for

like, he's having sex with a girl, having carefully picked a position that allows him to stare intently at her feet the whole time ofc, and she tells him to finish inside her but he's like "NO, madam; I refuse, because I have PRINCIPLES"

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SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

loquacius posted:

it's a funnier image than I initially gave it credit for

like, he's having sex with a girl, having carefully picked a position that allows him to stare intently at her feet the whole time ofc, and she tells him to finish inside her but he's like "NO, madam; I refuse, because I have PRINCIPLES"

he has prickciples

they're not great, but dammit, they're his

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