SA's Greatest Sagas: careful that's a load-bearing slur

The Something Awful Forums > Main > Post Your Favorite: Carefully Curated > SA's Greatest Sagas: careful that's a load-bearing slur

«‹›798 »

CharlestheHammer: Jun 26, 2011; YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!

Being off a decade in politics is a pretty big deal.

# ? Sep 4, 2018 20:57

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 1, 2024 03:58

Ariong: Jun 25, 2012; Get bashed, platonist!

Fleta Mcgurn posted:

Is it this?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1h0wLhCqUwI

# ? Sep 4, 2018 21:05

purple death ray: Jul 28, 2007; me omw 2 steal ur girl

Look I don't know anything about this guy, obviously there's a lot of yall who do, and I'm sure he was a huge dipshit and deserved to be banned, but that's still a wild rear end thing to read in 2018.

# ? Sep 4, 2018 21:13

Subjunctive: Sep 12, 2006; ✨sparkle and shine✨

You�re going to love this Nostradamus guy.

# ? Sep 4, 2018 21:15

Moon Slayer: Jun 19, 2007

Yeah you're really reaching.

# ? Sep 4, 2018 22:12

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

I bet our next few presidents will be in their late 60's early 70s and we'll never see a president younger than 60 before the French Chinese Coalition conquers New Iowa and burns the federal capital of Des Moines.

# ? Sep 4, 2018 22:47

syscall girl: Nov 7, 2009; by FactsAreUseless; Fun Shoe

Solice Kirsk posted:

I bet our next few presidents will be in their late 60's early 70s and we'll never see a president younger than 60 before the French Chinese Coalition conquers New Iowa and burns the federal capital of Des Moines.

I bet you're a lot of fun at parties

# ? Sep 4, 2018 22:52

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

Solice Kirsk posted:

I bet our next few presidents will be in their late 60's early 70s and we'll never see a president younger than 60 before the French Chinese Coalition conquers New Iowa and burns the federal capital of Des Moines.

AOC will just about qualify for the presidency in the 2024 elections. I'm already dreaming of a fun twitter President. :unsmith:

# ? Sep 4, 2018 22:54

DicktheCat: Feb 15, 2011

Applesnots posted:

Anyone remember that goon that was trying to grow giant bugs in a high oxygen atmosphere? I thought it was neat and then lost the thread a few years back.

Wasn't that Gensesplicer doing that for his classroom? I never saw the end of that thread.

# ? Sep 4, 2018 23:05

andrew smash: Jun 26, 2006; smooth soul

P Ex is a lunatic and nobody should ever take him seriously. He was still right about Hillary and ron paul (yeah, I know, but he gets a little nod for calling ron paul�s bullshit when he was still popular in main D&D here)

# ? Sep 4, 2018 23:55

Mr. Fall Down Terror: Jan 24, 2018; by Fluffdaddy

purple death ray posted:

Look I don't know anything about this guy, obviously there's a lot of yall who do, and I'm sure he was a huge dipshit and deserved to be banned, but that's still a wild rear end thing to read in 2018.

paradol ex coiled the phrase "wrap it up obamailures" which isn't as popular around here as it used to be

also he had a nervous breakdown about professional wrestling when wrestler chris benoit murdered his family

andrew smash posted:

P Ex is a lunatic and nobody should ever take him seriously. He was still right about Hillary and ron paul (yeah, I know, but he gets a little nod for calling ron paul’s bullshit when he was still popular in main D&D here)

eh 2008 was peak "gently caress ron paul"

# ? Sep 5, 2018 00:04

Improbable Lobster: Jan 6, 2012; "From each according to his ability" said Ares. It sounded like a quotation.; Buglord

purple death ray posted:

He just had the names and years wrong - an extremely popular democratic candidate ran a campaign funded by his legions of supporters giving tiny donations, said candidate did in fact lose the nomination because of entrenched power structures, and Hillary was then completely owned by a corporate republican rear end in a top hat boss type guy in the general.

That's honestly pretty solid prediction just based on the general tone & direction of national discourse in 2008. He was off a decade but he fuckin called this poo poo

It wasn't, he didn't

# ? Sep 5, 2018 01:01

Aesop Poprock: Oct 21, 2008; Grimey Drawer

luxury handset posted:

paradol ex coiled the phrase "wrap it up obamailures" which isn't as popular around here as it used to be

also he had a nervous breakdown about professional wrestling when wrestler chris benoit murdered his family

eh 2008 was peak "gently caress ron paul"

His Chris Benoit meltdown was amazing and I still struggle to read through it without physically cringing

# ? Sep 5, 2018 15:40

Spanish Manlove: Aug 31, 2008; HAILGAYSATAN

Aesop Poprock posted:

His Chris Benoit meltdown was amazing and I still struggle to read through it without physically cringing

Does anyone have a link to that?

# ? Sep 5, 2018 15:59

DJ Fuckboy Supreme: Feb 10, 2011; And when you stare long into the abyss, you become aggressively, terminally chill

Aesop Poprock posted:

His Chris Benoit meltdown was amazing and I still struggle to read through it without physically cringing

For those of us without archives it would be lovely to link it for posterity tia

# ? Sep 5, 2018 15:59

Ghost Leviathan: Mar 2, 2017; Exploration is ill-advised.

IIRC someone on the Hilary team did note the eerie similarities that Trump was running a campaign similar to Obama's against Hillary, an outsider with bold new ideas against the entrenched establishment. But then again that's not exactly a new or rare political story.

# ? Sep 5, 2018 18:26

FactsAreUseless: Feb 16, 2011

Ghost Leviathan posted:

IIRC someone on the Hilary team did note the eerie similarities that Trump was running a campaign similar to Obama's against Hillary, an outsider with bold new ideas against the entrenched establishment. But then again that's not exactly a new or rare political story.

Unfortunately, Hillary Clinton decided to run a campaign similar to Hillary Clinton's.

# ? Sep 5, 2018 20:25

joylessdivision: Jun 15, 2013

DJ Fuckboy Supreme posted:

For those of us without archives it would be lovely to link it for posterity tia

Or for those of us with archives. I need to see this.

# ? Sep 6, 2018 00:14

the escape goat: Apr 16, 2008

Thread-
https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2535847

Meltdown-
https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2535847&userid=68254

# ? Sep 6, 2018 00:28

Alaois: Feb 7, 2012

the escape goat posted:

Thread-
https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2535847

Meltdown-
https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2535847&userid=68254

This doesn't have The Post though, that's what everyone is looking for

# ? Sep 6, 2018 00:33

Ariong: Jun 25, 2012; Get bashed, platonist!

Maybe I'm missing something, but that doesn't really read like a meltdown to me, so much as just a person coming to terms with the fact that someone they looked up to did something really horrible and tragic. Even if it was a meltdown, that seems like an appropriate time to have one.

# ? Sep 6, 2018 00:38

oldpainless: Oct 30, 2009; This 📆 post brought to you by RAID💥: SHADOW LEGENDS👥.
RAID💥: SHADOW LEGENDS 👥 - It's for your phone📲^TM� #ad📢

He just couldn�t accept it

# ? Sep 6, 2018 00:44

andrew smash: Jun 26, 2006; smooth soul

Does anybody have the post where he offered to fight any goon troop who wanted to, and guaranteed he would win because he successfully completed wrestling camp

# ? Sep 6, 2018 01:49

Ugly In The Morning: Jul 1, 2010; Pillbug

andrew smash posted:

Does anybody have the post where he offered to fight any goon troop who wanted to, and guaranteed he would win because he successfully completed wrestling camp

Are you sure you�re not mixing it up with Caro wanting to box a cop?

# ? Sep 6, 2018 03:19

Vincent Van Goatse: Nov 8, 2006; Enjoy every sandwich.; Smellrose

Alaois posted:

This doesn't have The Post though, that's what everyone is looking for

Here y'all go:

Paradol Ex posted:

I was trying to go to sleep a few minutes ago and for some reason the enormity of these events finally hit me and I couldn't stop crying. I have no real life friends who give a poo poo about professional wrestling, so this is basically the only place I have to express these feelings, but I really feel the need to express them.

I would like this thread to be about our personal feelings about the death of Chris Benoit, and how it has personally affected us. Just TV-IVing about the details as they come in, or wondering about the WWE's future, and all of that bullshit has no place here. I need to write about my feelings about Chris Benoit. Obviously these posts will be mocked elsewhere on the forums, but gently caress em. If you feel the need to say anything, say it.

-----

Chris Benoit is a murderer. He killed his wife and child. We will probably never know exactly what he was thinking. Obviously I did not know Chris Benoit. I never saw him in person and never spoke to him. But he represented something very special to me. In such a cut-throat, dirty, dark, often disgusting, business he was one of the good ones. When people talked poo poo about wrestling and the bastards involved in it, you could always muffin out Chris Benoit as the exception to the rule. He was the one you could muffin to as a true professional who honored the sport he loved, who was passionate about it, who proved that you could dedicate your life to professional wrestling without being insane or scum or a monster. He was the ace in the hole. He was the one who wasn't in it for the pussy or because he was a failed jock in another sport or because he wanted to get rich quick or because he wanted to be a movie star or because he saw wrestling as a means to an end. He was in it for professional wrestling. He was dedicated to being the best professional wrestler he could be, and it showed in the ring.

I wanted to be a professional wrestler since I was a little kid, and one of the very worst moments of my life was a cold night in San Antonio when I was on the phone to my girlfriend a thousand miles away and finally admitted to myself and to her that coming to Texas to be a wrestler had been a mistake. Coming to grips that I was simply not athletically or charismatically talented enough to be a professional wrestler was one of the worst moments of my life. The business glorifies the boyhood dreams that come true. My boyhood dream wasn't going to come true, and it was an upsetting, soul-crushing revelation that upsets and discourages me to this day.

Since then I lived vicariously through Chris Benoit in a lot of ways. He wasn't a man who was destined to be a WWE champion. He couldn't talk. He wasn't charismatic in the usual way. He was quiet. He was short. The only thing he had going for him was his work ethic. He wasn't a third generation wrestler. He wasn't physically gifted. He wasn't someone who had words come easy to him. But through sheer effort he was able to become one of the greatest professional wrestlers in history. By 40 years-old.

Chris Benoit was only forty, and he was already a legend on the verge of myth. That's how talented he was, and how respected.

I cannot reconcile in my mind that the man who unnecessarily gave back so much to the sport could end his life the way he did. I can't understand how a man could spend weeks and months trying to give back to younger guys like MVP, putting forth the care and effort to help them find their voice in the ring, and that that same man could strangle his wife and child only weeks later. It doesn't make sense. It shouldn't have happened this way. Not for him, not for Nancy, and not for their child.

Chris Benoit owed me nothing. But I still feel the loss. I selfishly lived through many of his accomplishments and now feel lost. I can only speak for myself, but I feel that for a lot of us Mondays and Fridays are rocks of stability in a storm of stress and uncertainty. Every week the show goes on. Every week the show is from somewhere new, somewhere in the world, but every week it comes into our homes.

And that will continue. But Chris Benoit is dead. And he died a murderer. And whether it be insanity, drugs, or just the actions of a clear-eyed monster, what is done is done. And one of the pillars for the guys backstage and one of the pillars for fans is gone. And everything that pillar held up is tainted and dripping with blood.

Chris Benoit was a murderer. And I don't know how to accept that.

# ? Sep 6, 2018 03:33

andrew smash: Jun 26, 2006; smooth soul

Ugly In The Morning posted:

Are you sure you�re not mixing it up with Caro wanting to box a cop?

No, P. Ex absolutely issued an open challenge to fight any military goon and said he was certain he�d win because he trained as a pro wrestler hopeful.

Edit: he alluded to his wrestler training in the Benoit post above

# ? Sep 6, 2018 03:39

Ghost Leviathan: Mar 2, 2017; Exploration is ill-advised.

FactsAreUseless posted:

Unfortunately, Hillary Clinton decided to run a campaign similar to Hillary Clinton's.

This belongs in C-SPAM. [/IndianaJones]

# ? Sep 6, 2018 05:38

Applesnots: Oct 22, 2010; MERRY YOBMAS

DicktheCat posted:

Wasn't that Gensesplicer doing that for his classroom? I never saw the end of that thread.

Sounds familiar, think he is still posting these days. Maybe.

# ? Sep 6, 2018 05:48

RFC2324: Jun 7, 2012; http 418

Applesnots posted:

Sounds familiar, think he is still posting these days. Maybe.

He is mod of gbs, so he likely posts occasionally

# ? Sep 6, 2018 05:50

joylessdivision: Jun 15, 2013

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

Here y'all go:

Thanks.

To derail slightly, I remember when the Benoit thing happened because I was just sliding out of a heavy phase of being a wrestling fan.

Eddie Guerrero's death had soured me on the whole thing, and so when Benoit happened it was sad but just another reminder that Wrestling is still a carney rear end businesses with a long trail of bodies in it's wake.

Also, LOL pointing to Benoit as being one of the "Good Ones" loving Mick Foley comes to mind immediately for "Wrestler who isn't a giant scum gently caress". I mean yeah, Benoit was a fairly normal dude as far as everyone knew. You know except for the massive brain trauma he had because of wrestling.

Sorry for the wrestling derail, I just had to get that out of my system. Now I'm bummed out because wrestling is a nightmare business.

# ? Sep 6, 2018 06:28

Screaming Idiot: Nov 26, 2007; JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.

joylessdivision posted:

Thanks.

To derail slightly, I remember when the Benoit thing happened because I was just sliding out of a heavy phase of being a wrestling fan.

Eddie Guerrero's death had soured me on the whole thing, and so when Benoit happened it was sad but just another reminder that Wrestling is still a carney rear end businesses with a long trail of bodies in it's wake.

Also, LOL pointing to Benoit as being one of the "Good Ones" loving Mick Foley comes to mind immediately for "Wrestler who isn't a giant scum gently caress". I mean yeah, Benoit was a fairly normal dude as far as everyone knew. You know except for the massive brain trauma he had because of wrestling.

Sorry for the wrestling derail, I just had to get that out of my system. Now I'm bummed out because wrestling is a nightmare business.

Just remember that New Day exists and rest easy in the knowledge that Ginyu Squad is real.

TOKUSENTAI!!!

# ? Sep 6, 2018 06:40

the escape goat: Apr 16, 2008

The whole thing seemed like a meltdown to me; the legit troubling part was when he mentioned he was hoping Nancy killed the kid and that it set Chris off. Like... What the poo poo?

# ? Sep 6, 2018 06:42

GoutPatrol: Oct 17, 2009; *Stupid Babby*

the escape goat posted:

The whole thing seemed like a meltdown to me; the legit troubling part was when he mentioned he was hoping Nancy killed the kid and that it set Chris off. Like... What the poo poo?

If you go into every benoit thread on every message board in the world you'll find those posts. These were people who desperately, desperately wanted to hold on to the idea that the wrestler they loved wasn't a murderer. Like it meant so much to them.

# ? Sep 6, 2018 07:02

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

With a little effort they could have spun it into a storyline. Ball dropped WWE.

# ? Sep 6, 2018 14:26

sweet geek swag: Mar 29, 2006; Adjust lasers to FUN!

GoutPatrol posted:

If you go into every benoit thread on every message board in the world you'll find those posts. These were people who desperately, desperately wanted to hold on to the idea that the wrestler they loved wasn't a murderer. Like it meant so much to them.

I mean no one wants to see their heroes turned into monsters, right? You can argue that having a professional wrestler as a hero is stupid (and I'd agree), but this is just human nature. It's either denial or bargaining from the five stages of grief. This isn't so much funny as it is horribly pathetic, because why would you put so much of your self worth in a fake wrestler?

# ? Sep 6, 2018 15:43

WeedlordGoku69: Feb 12, 2015; by Cyrano4747

feeling bad over Chris Benoit makes you a bad person, real non-virgin chads laugh whenever they think of his hanging corpse

# ? Sep 6, 2018 16:20

TheKennedys: Sep 23, 2006; By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet

I went to read through the Internet Whore and Jammer Jones threads again (thanks Fleta) because it's been over a decade, and hooooooly poo poo has goon behavior ca. mid-2000s not aged well at all. I kinda expected it from the Internet Whore one, because c'mon, it was mid-2000s SA and the whole schtick was to call each other slurs in new and creative ways, but the lengths people went to to insult the (plain but otherwise perfectly ordinary looking) OP's looks in the Jammer Jones thread was a lot even for goons. The constant "well honey, maybe if you put on some makeup and wore heels you'd be prettier" patter in there, dead sincere, is the poo poo we make fun of today. And that's without even getting into the insane doxxing in the Internet Whore thread.

# ? Sep 6, 2018 18:19