Oh no. I'm being sued. Again.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Oh no. I'm being sued. Again.

Bethamphetamine: Oct 29, 2012

Sexual Aluminum posted:

I think they have the Tax over a barrel here. Where is the backup site once this one is liquidated to pay for photo crimes?

There's this website called imgur.com. They have so many hitlers they can't be sued for just one hitler.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:01

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# ? Jun 9, 2024 22:02

Verisimilidude: Dec 20, 2006; Strike quick and hurry at him,
not caring to hit or miss.
So that you dishonor him before the judges

spacetoaster posted:

Also, he's very vocal about liking trump on his tweeter.

Pretty cool dude.

lol to literally no one's surprise

why would the slimeball lawyer legally grifting people out of their money like DJT?

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:02

alnilam: Nov 10, 2009

Sexual Aluminum posted:

I think they have the Tax over a barrel here. Where is the backup site once this one is liquidated to pay for photo crimes?

not just photo crimes... hitler photo crimes!

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:04

Fur20: Nov 14, 2007; すご▞い！
君は働か░い
フ▙▓ズなんだね！

pro tip their email form doesn't have a captcha and doesn't de-fill when you hit back on your browser

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:05

Geemer: Nov 4, 2010

Man this Xenforo unveil ARG is intense!

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:06

alnilam: Nov 10, 2009

Lowtax I believe on these very forums i have seen people call you "literally hitler"... if this is true, perhaps you can countersue for unauthorized use of your likeness??
Best,
alnilam

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:06

curlys gold: Jan 17, 2018

there once was a putz named laurant
whose lovely name came from an aunt
her title is bogus
she hopes for a bonus
passed down from a doughy-faced ponce

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:07

alnilam: Nov 10, 2009

The White Dragon posted:

pro tip their email form doesn't have a captcha and doesn't de-fill when you hit back on your browser

Are you suggesting that these people don't understand the internet very well??

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:07

Blurry Gray Thing: Jun 3, 2009

DoctorStrangelove posted:

I'm a Hitler specialist. Ask me anything.

How many Hitlers can heil on the head of a pin?

And how many of them are legal to post?

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:09

DoctorStrangelove: Jun 7, 2012; IT WOULD NOT BE DIFFICULT MEIN FUHRER!

Blurry Gray Thing posted:

How many Hitlers can heil on the head of a pin?

And how many of them are legal to post?

The answer to the first question is zero.

The answer to the second question is also zero.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:13

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

Lowtax posted:

quote:
Consequently, I would be careful with leading us to litigate this case as it would appear that the merits are different and could lead to this claim being filed in court. It would behoove you to work with us and avoid any possibility of further action.

lol

Moridin920 fucked around with this message at 22:17 on Sep 10, 2018

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:13

Lowtax: Nov 16, 1999; by Skyl3lazer

It. Continues.

quote:

Shauntece Laurant

Mr. Kyanka,

I am not sure if I should continue to be entertained by your petty comments or to advise you that the claim has already been forwarded to our litigation team. If it makes you feel bigger, better or more handsome to continue your insults then by all means.

Your tactics won�t hurt my feelings nor will they distract us from the bigger picture. But hey, you may do what ever makes you feel better.

Best

She (or he) has seen through my clever ruse! I'm done for! I'm over with! I'm... uh... replying!

quote:

Shauntece,

If I am not mistaken, and I never am, you appear to have both been entertained AND informative regarding the claim forwarding. Now that's what I call the best of both worlds! You had your cake and ate it too! Again, I could opt for the obvious joke here that explicitly insinuates you eat urinal cakes, but as I am already both very big and handsome, I will not bother. But I am curious: do you eat urinal cakes? You may take as much time as you like to answer.

I am glad my nefarious tactics are unable to distract you from the "bigger picture," which I am assuming is the one of Hitler, the guy your law firm is threatening to sue me over. Please, do not distract your fellow employees who are diligently researching how many billions of dollars you can sue me for because a member of my forums posted a link to an image hosted on Imgur. Of course a much easier solution here would be to have one of your fellow Higbee human toilet people contact Imgur and request they remove the image. Or contact the person who uploaded the image. But clearly I'm not a high powered lawyer like you fine folks at the Hitler Image Protection Legal Firm.

Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka
CEO and now also PRESIDENT of internet

PS: I am starting to suspect that you might not actually be wishing me "best," as the end of your email claims. Please let me know if I'm off-base here, and it's just a simple misunderstanding. I wish your litigation team the best of luck with their precious Hitler image!

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:13

Palpek: Dec 27, 2008; Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.

A firm with years of experience specializing in internet image copyright law: Who is this Imgur guy you speak of? He's 'holding' photographs for who now? Aunt Rebbit? Mr. Awful, please clarify your affiliations with all those people at once.

Signed, Shauntecella Hitler.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:13

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

Your next reply should be asking them to represent you in a copyright case involving Hitler Goatse (or Hitlerse, for short).

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:17

AllNewJonasSalk: Apr 22, 2017; THUNDERDOME LOSER

"We will not be distracted from our ultimate goal of a Fourth Reich. Lawsuits against every member of the Jew run media until that day when Cyborg Hitler shall stutter step again."

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:18

Palpek: Dec 27, 2008; Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.

Dear Shauntece,

I did nazi that coming.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:19

Bethamphetamine: Oct 29, 2012

I'm definitely probably going to goatse Higbee

and then sue them for viewing the prolapsed image unlawfully

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:21

Zil: Jun 4, 2011; Satanically Summoned Citrus

Your Taint posted:

Your next reply should be asking them to represent you in a copyright case involving Hitler Goatse (or Hitlerse, for short).

Goatler.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:22

Burt Sexual: Jan 26, 2006; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS; Switchblade Switcharoo

Someone has a crush on LowTax, Someone has a crush on LowTax, Someone has a crush on LowTax!

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:22

HugeGrossBurrito: Mar 20, 2018

My extremely legit lawfirm that engages in pointless back and forth emails instead of just going to court and moving on.
:hmmyes:

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:23

deedee megadoodoo: Sep 28, 2000; Two roads diverged in a wood, and I, I took the one to Flavortown, and that has made all the difference.

All of this sounds extremely legitimate. Both sides.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:24

Lowtax: Nov 16, 1999; by Skyl3lazer

I decided to toss in a free bonus email to them, out of the pure kindness of my heart.

quote:

Oh, and since I'm such a swell guy, I'll send you a little graphic explaining Imgur's copyright and linking policies, which clearly dictates the copyright responsibility for each and every image is the sole responsibility of the individual who uploaded it. I'm sure it was just a freak accident that you guys somehow missed the literal first search result for "copyright law and internet image links imgur," but it's not like you guys are lawyers whose sole job is to do such things as required by the law. Here's the link as well; let me know if you require explicit, step by step instructions detailing how to click internet links.

https://help.imgur.com/hc/en-us/articles/202062328-Can-I-use-images-I-find-here-on-my-TV-show-blog-news-article-etc-

Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka
Owner and founder of Imgur, Your One Stop Source For All Images Hitler.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:25

Xenocides: Jan 14, 2008; This world looks very scary....

Sexual Aluminum posted:

I think they have the Tax over a barrel here. Where is the backup site once this one is liquidated to pay for photo crimes?

We will have to retreat to the darkweb with dire prophecies of our return for vengeance in a hundred years.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:25

Zil: Jun 4, 2011; Satanically Summoned Citrus

Xenocides posted:

We will have to retreat to the darkweb with dire prophecies of our return for vengeance in a hundred years.

Do we have a wiki set up for this migration yet?

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:27

Sophy Wackles: Dec 17, 2000; > access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.

Bethamphetamine posted:

I'm definitely probably going to goatse Higbee

and then sue them for viewing the prolapsed image unlawfully

I wonder if this firm would take on the difficult and important case of defending the IP of goatse.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:27

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

This is noted garbage person Shauntice Laurant (I don't care if I misspelled that)

I'm not a creeper it's from her linkedin which is literally the first result if you Google her name.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:28

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

Zil posted:

Goatler.

I will fight you.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:29

Lowtax: Nov 16, 1999; by Skyl3lazer

Your Taint posted:

This is noted garbage person Shauntice Laurant (I don't care if I misspelled that)

I'm not a creeper it's from her linkedin which is literally the first result if you Google her name.

Googling peoples' names is illegal. Higbee and Associates will have your hide for this, bub.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:29

Kia Soul Enthusias: May 9, 2004; zoom-zoom; Toilet Rascal

I'm not a fan of making fun of people's names and now I see looking up their pictures. Come on.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:29

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

Lowtax posted:

Googling peoples' names is illegal. Higbee and Associates will have your hide for this, bub.

poo poo. Can I get Leonard "J" Krabs on retainer?

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:30

Palpek: Dec 27, 2008; Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.

Lowtax, you're warming up to this Shauntece lady with each e-mail. You used a hell of an opening line at first but I foresee that in 20-30 responses you could have a shot.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:31

Lowtax: Nov 16, 1999; by Skyl3lazer

Charles posted:

I'm not a fan of making fun of people's names and now I see looking up their pictures. Come on.

I'm not a fan of scam law firms trying to extort money from me, but hey, here we are.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:31

Node: May 20, 2001; KICKED IN THE COOTER; Taco Defender

Who could have known that, in the end, it was Hitler that had the last laugh.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:32

Da Mott Man: Aug 3, 2012

Chick with a stupid name and low intelligence? Shes prob hot.

EDIT: OH GOD I LINKED SOMETHING FROM IMGUR PLEASE DONT ACTUALLY SUE ME

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:32

Professor of Cats: Mar 22, 2009

BUT WHAT ABOUT THEIR FEELINGS????

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:33

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

Node posted:

Who could have known that, in the end, it was Hitler that had the last laugh.

The real Hitler was the one inside us all along.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:34

Lowtax: Nov 16, 1999; by Skyl3lazer

Da Mott Man posted:

Chick with a stupid name and low intelligence? Shes prob hot.

I don't know how to break this to you man......

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:34

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

Your Taint posted:

This is noted garbage person Shauntice Laurant (I don't care if I misspelled that)

I'm not a creeper it's from her linkedin which is literally the first result if you Google her name.

The image linking continues!!!!!!!!!

Da Mott Man posted:

Chick with a stupid name and low intelligence? Shes prob hot.

EDIT: OH GOD I LINKED SOMETHING FROM IMGUR PLEASE DONT ACTUALLY SUE ME

You're so litigated now
Da Mott Man versus USA

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:36

Da Mott Man: Aug 3, 2012

Lowtax posted:

I don't know how to break this to you man......

Oh, just saw someone posted a picture. Thats what I get for cruising these here ol' interpipes for witty 90's style jiff images, sure does take a while with this 56k modem.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:37

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# ? Jun 9, 2024 22:02

BigBallChunkyTime: Nov 25, 2011; Kyle Schwarber: World Series hero, Beefy Lad, better than you.; Illegal Hen

She's wearing one of them fancy scientist coats. You know, like you wear when doing science.

# ? Sep 10, 2018 22:37

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Oh no. I'm being sued. Again.

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