SKULL.GIF posted:

https://twitter.com/timkmak/status/1049694756090068995

Shear Modulus posted:

conservative intellectuals have always been a total sham

Pancakes posted:

and all, but get an exercise bike (I recommend magnetic resistance so you minimize noise in case of neighbors) and a tablet and then shitpost while biking. Easy 45-90 minutes of cardio daily there. I guess also stream poo poo if C-SPAM doesn�t sustain you.

mormonpartyboat posted:

tho in the original HCA story shrek was uncircumcised

Xaris posted:

wait the party that advocates lead brain damage and can't critically think or do anything, and has been advocating return to slavery and indentured servitude, women as inferior beings, and phrenology for the last 100+ years is a sham?

n..noo....i can't believe it how could this have happened??

Rah! posted:

POOP

(punch oall ougly pnazis)

tenderjerk posted:

yall rmemeber when bari's little sister didn't get into the schools she wanted and so she got a WSJ op-ed space handed to her to complain about it

sloppo posted:

i just... i don't understand

how do you make a career out of writing or speaking about political or intellectual things with brazen confidence

and then be like "oh geez i guess i was wrong. prob shouldve done the reading"

who are these people? what are they like in the rest of their lives??

Cao Ni Ma posted:

Why did Haely get pushed out?

Cao Ni Ma posted:

Why did Haely get pushed out?

Al! posted:

no lol, did she blame the blacks?

Flavius Aetass posted:

cilizza is dumb as rocks. he's an incredible indictment of modern society

MysteriousStranger posted:

Let this man tell you why gay people are bad, traditional gender norms are needed, Christianity is needed for freedom from sex and thus demons and how Satan caused Anthony Bourdain to kill himself. Intellectualism at it's finest!!

https://www.theamericanconservative.com/dreher/the-shrink-who-assists-exorcists/

Shear Modulus posted:

being incredibly stupid is a big plus if you want to be a talking head because anyone with two brain cells to rub together would have the urge to interrogate the pile of bullshit that you have to print to get ahead. start asking questions and your job will go to someone who wont

the two ways to become a pundit are to be incredibly stupid or incredibly dishonest

Flavius Aetass posted:

cilizza is dumb as rocks. he's an incredible indictment of modern society

MysteriousStranger posted:

Let this man tell you why gay people are bad, traditional gender norms are needed, Christianity is needed for freedom from sex and thus demons and how Satan caused Anthony Bourdain to kill himself. Intellectualism at it's finest!!

https://www.theamericanconservative.com/dreher/the-shrink-who-assists-exorcists/

SKULL.GIF posted:

https://twitter.com/timkmak/status/1049694756090068995

Al! posted:

no lol, did she blame the blacks?

quote:

If only I had a tiger mom or started a fake charity.

By Suzy Lee Weiss

March 29, 2013 6:31 p.m. ET

Like me, millions of high-school seniors with sour grapes are asking themselves this week how they failed to get into the colleges of their dreams. It's simple: For years, they�we�were lied to.

Colleges tell you, "Just be yourself." That is great advice, as long as yourself has nine extracurriculars, six leadership positions, three varsity sports, killer SAT scores and two moms. Then by all means, be yourself! If you work at a local pizza shop and are the slowest person on the cross-country team, consider taking your business elsewhere.

What could I have done differently over the past years?

For starters, had I known two years ago what I know now, I would have gladly worn a headdress to school. Show me to any closet, and I would've happily come out of it. "Diversity!" I offer about as much diversity as a saltine cracker. If it were up to me, I would've been any of the diversities: Navajo, Pacific Islander, anything. Sen. Elizabeth Warren, I salute you and your 1/32 Cherokee heritage.

I also probably should have started a fake charity. Providing veterinary services for homeless people's pets. Collecting donations for the underprivileged chimpanzees of the Congo. Raising awareness for Chapped-Lips-in-the-Winter Syndrome. Fun-runs, dance-a-thons, bake sales�as long as you're using someone else's misfortunes to try to propel yourself into the Ivy League, you're golden.

Having a tiger mom helps, too. As the youngest of four daughters, I noticed long ago that my parents gave up on parenting me. It has been great in certain ways: Instead of "Be home by 11," it's "Don't wake us up when you come through the door, we're trying to sleep." But my parents also left me with a dearth of hobbies that make admissions committees salivate. I've never sat down at a piano, never plucked a violin. Karate lasted about a week and the swim team didn't last past the first lap. Why couldn't Amy Chua have adopted me as one of her cubs?

Then there was summer camp. I should've done what I knew was best�go to Africa, scoop up some suffering child, take a few pictures, and write my essays about how spending that afternoon with Kinto changed my life. Because everyone knows that if you don't have anything difficult going on in your own life, you should just hop on a plane so you're able to talk about what other people have to deal with.

Or at least hop to an internship. Get a precocious-sounding title to put on your resume. "Assistant Director of Mail Services." "Chairwoman of Coffee Logistics." I could have been a gopher in the office of someone I was related to. Work experience!

To those kids who by age 14 got their doctorate, cured a disease, or discovered a guilt-free brownie recipe: My parents make me watch your "60 Minutes" segments, and they've clipped your newspaper articles for me to read before bed. You make us mere mortals look bad. (Also, I am desperately jealous and willing to pay a lot to learn your secrets.)

To those claiming that I am bitter�you bet I am! An underachieving selfish teenager making excuses for her own failures? That too! To those of you disgusted by this, shocked that I take for granted the wonderful gifts I have been afforded, I say shhhh�"The Real Housewives" is on.

Ms. Weiss is a senior at Taylor Allderdice High School in Pittsburgh.

Phone posted:

tenderjerk posted:

i dont think so, but i think she blamed every other race?

e:

Xaris posted:

remidns me of the mid 2000s handwringing of daily show where the (very rare) occurrence in which a neocon went on with stewart he'd just throw dumb softballs. and then post justification was "well if he was too mean to them they wouldn't go on the show! / wouldn't get invited to interviews"

like yeah no poo poo but dont give them free aire time to begin wtih then

Xaris posted:

remidns me of the mid 2000s handwringing of daily show where the (very rare) occurrence in which a neocon went on with stewart he'd just throw dumb softballs. and then post justification was "well if he was too mean to them they wouldn't go on the show! / wouldn't get invited to interviews"

like yeah no poo poo but dont give them free aire time to begin wtih then

tenderjerk posted:

this is why i miss jindal, i don't think we have a national "you literally have demons inside your body and im going get those demons out" conservative in this vein anymore

Thoguh posted:

My understanding is that when the big cargo ships are out to sea the stuff they burn is basically one step above tar and that's a big reason they pollute so much.

MysteriousStranger posted:

and then whatever residual enthusiasm I felt for the venture dissipated, with shocking speed, as she nibbled at my ear and whispered��You know, I�m on the pill��[/i]

Inspector Hound posted:

The secret to a six pack better be doing situps while holding a bigass weight or I'm in loving agony for nothing

tenderjerk posted:

this is why i miss jindal, i don't think we have a national "you literally have demons inside your body and im going get those demons out" conservative in this vein anymore

Inspector Hound posted:

The secret to a six pack better be doing situps while holding a bigass weight or I'm in loving agony for nothing

Dr_0ctag0n posted:

A good cardio workout is eating as many plates of Chinese buffet as you can before you become short of breath.