Communist Walrus posted:

I wrote an unauthorized prequel novel that reveals Jay Gatsby never actually fought in World War I and instead received a letter of marque from the French and used it to raid Ottoman shipping, having many adventures both heroic and romantic. Follow me on Twitter @greatgatsbyauthor

Anne Frank Funk posted:

@duneauthor wishes he had the balls to go on camera and admit that he is raping his dad like that weird dude from Mexico did.

Pham Nuwen posted:

I'm sure I've posted this before but, well, it's from 2003 and as someone who was reading Dune, the Herbert/Anderson Dune books, and Penny Arcade at that time, it seemed pretty correct:



(Having read my share of Tycho's purple prose bullshit blog posts in my time, though, he doesn't have a lot of room to bitch about bad writing)

priznat posted:

D-wolves = Dick Wolves?

Whoa

(P-A deep cut ITT)

phasmid posted:

We should all just start calling ourselves @duneauthor. It makes sense. We have just as good - if not better - a grasp of the source material than that cheating sperm that calls itself Brian Herbert. Let us denounce them and all their works and write our own canon. Based loosely on the Encyclopedia and the original stories (dune and non-dune) by Frank Herbert @realLETOIIPBUH.

priznat posted:

It’s me, I’m the @duneauthor.

@DuneAuthor posted:

Concurrently, the no-ship, the Ithaca, was captured by the Machines and brought to Synchrony, as well. The Machine leaders believed that the end of the age, or Kralizec, was upon the galaxies. To strongly influence this universal change in their favor, they wanted to capture the Ultimate Kwisatz Haderach, whom Erasmus' complex "mathematical projections", showed to be on the Ithaca. As a back-up plan, they had secretly, 13 years earlier, created a clone of the first super-being, Paul Atreides, whom they named Paolo. They had him brought up and trained by Vladimir Harkonnen for a cruel personality, and Erasmus trained him in fighting skills.

@DuneAuthor posted:

As the teenage ghola of Paul Atreides was captured on the Ithaca, and brought to the capital of Synchrony, the Cathedral; so too, was Paolo brought to the heart of the Machine World-city. Omnius announced that Paul and Paolo would fight to the death, and the winner would be given the cache of ultraspice. Paolo near-fatally wounded Paul, and was declared the winner of the duel. Paolo quickly imbibed a huge portion of the super-potent melange, and found his prescience increased to super-human levels. Paolo quickly found that the ultraspice caused his prescience to go into a type of overdose, and he fell into an irreversible trance-like coma, and ended up starving and thirsting to death.

It is not know if ultraspice was ever used again.

@DuneAuthor posted:

Seaworms were genetically altered sandworms produced by the ghola of the Tleilaxu Master Tylwyth Waff while aboard a Guild heighliner, which was also being used as a research ship. Waff successfully stopped the altered sandworm from turning into a water-imploding creature, and instead turned the creature into one which naturally lived in deep oceans.

To test the success of the seaworms, Waff had a group of seaworms delivered to the ocean world of Buzzell. Not only did the seaworms survive in the seas of the planet, but they thrived and quickly dominated the eco-system; displacing and eating the native cholisters, and the half-fish/half-men Phibians.

Milkfred E. Moore posted:

The pain! It burns!

basic hitler posted:

both of your lists have their merits, i could agree with either of them if i was in a good mood.

basic hitler posted:

@duneauthor

Cheap Trick posted:

Y'all left out this masterpiece:



Sure its humour is dated as expected (and as a non-American, slightly incomprehensible without the aid of Wikipedia) but it's still one of my favorite books.

Ghost Leviathan posted:

I'm the legendary Super Fremen

Cheap Trick posted:

Y'all left out this masterpiece:



Sure its humour is dated as expected (and as a non-American, slightly incomprehensible without the aid of Wikipedia) but it's still one of my favorite books.

priznat posted:

It’s me, I’m the @duneauthor.

quote:

LORD CYBERTREX-9000 gestured towards the ultraspice hoard.
"As agreed, Paolo, the ultraspice is yours."
Paolo lunged at the heap of refined melange, imbibing it by the fistful. Soon his body began to tremble, and he turned towards his machine master.
"My lord, I'm so high right now."
A grinding, mechanical chortle issued forth from LORD CYBERTREX-9000's sound port.
"Fool!" said the robot, "It is only oregano!"

Shageletic posted:

Joe Chill posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=35PWRL0GquM