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Citcon
Aug 31, 2018

by R. Guyovich

Beet Goblin posted:

can someone explain what the gently caress this is supposed to mean?



literally nothing and only a fool would read into it at all. Its a graph to fill out the powerpoint presentation the lower level scammers were asked to make up.

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Turkina_Prime
Oct 26, 2013

Store Citizer: What is release?

Drunk Theory
Aug 20, 2016


Oven Wrangler
Every year, every loving year power point is broken for this man. Jesus.

Chill out everybody.

Tokamak
Dec 22, 2004

"What is release?"

lol

Inkel
Feb 19, 2004

College Slice
Chris drunk as gently caress

Kosumo
Apr 9, 2016

#imwastedwithchris

Thoatse
Feb 29, 2016

Lol said the scorpion, lmao
paunch citizen

Drunk Theory
Aug 20, 2016


Oven Wrangler
Oh my god, is he leading this to being "its' already released here"

Hav
Dec 11, 2009

Fun Shoe

Citcon posted:

Everyone watching legit loved it. SC fans loved seeing the new stuff and trolls loved to pick at it. Everyone was entertained and it was so strong that their loving sales website crashed from the traffic.

This isn't hyperbole


Everyone predicting this wouldbe a crash and burn are again owned into corncobbing excuses.

I wanna see the price of the kraken, and give it a couple of days after the con, first.

This is literally a high pressure sales meeting of peers and people who want to be peers. The first thing Sandi asked was who was in an org, and apparently it was everyone. These are the faithful, the elevated who can attend the convocation and receive blessings from the source and be urged to keep the faith.




Let us adore him.

MarcusSA
Sep 23, 2007

Game is released.

ITS DONE.

Hahaha

Orange Carlisle
Jul 14, 2007

"How the game plays now"

It doesn't

Drunk Theory
Aug 20, 2016


Oven Wrangler
He's really doing this. He's commenting "what is release". What is the core experience.

Oh my god, he's defining this as released.

You got an Engine Room. You got a bed.

Inkel
Feb 19, 2004

College Slice
The game has already been released!

Thoatse
Feb 29, 2016

Lol said the scorpion, lmao

Beet Goblin posted:

can someone explain what the gently caress this is supposed to mean?



i'm the identical colors for different graph categories

trucutru
Jul 9, 2003

by Fluffdaddy
Real tactile physicallized ship

Tokamak
Dec 22, 2004

NO REFUNDS

Drunk Theory
Aug 20, 2016


Oven Wrangler
You got an engine room, you got a bed. You can dogfight. And 64 bit. It's released everyone!

Sarsapariller
Aug 14, 2015

Occasional vampire queen


What is "A game you can play without crashing," anyway. What does that really mean?

Orange Carlisle
Jul 14, 2007

lol most game engines struggle with big areas

No - just ones meant for corridor shooters that you are trying to crowbar into an MMO, dipshit

SoftNum
Mar 31, 2011

Thoatse posted:

i'm the identical colors for different graph categories

I'm the pretty much textbook example of why vis experts tell people not to use pie charts.

Drunk Theory
Aug 20, 2016


Oven Wrangler
And this is the powerpoint they'll be showing to the judge in a few months.

Hav
Dec 11, 2009

Fun Shoe

Drunk Theory posted:

Look everyone. Space, it only took..."looks at watch"

Do you know how big the fucker is? You can’t just snap your fingers, etc.

MarcusSA
Sep 23, 2007

lol game is done.

Get hosed Nerds.

Thoatse
Feb 29, 2016

Lol said the scorpion, lmao
NO FAKE LOADING SCREENS



...only real ones :smug:

Drunk Theory
Aug 20, 2016


Oven Wrangler
Yah, this feels like, "Here's why I have legally designed a game."

Orange Carlisle
Jul 14, 2007

All of this poo poo is super basic

"Making the gun shoot where it's aiming"

"Object persistence"

SoftNum
Mar 31, 2011

OMG they saved your location coordinates!

Also I love how they're still loving talking up proc planets, when they aren't even using it right.

Beet Wagon
Oct 19, 2015





Inkel posted:

The game has already been released!

is this real?

Orange Carlisle
Jul 14, 2007

Beet Goblin posted:

is this real?

Or is it just fantasy

caught in the last slide

without virtual reality

Thoatse
Feb 29, 2016

Lol said the scorpion, lmao
stop the threadstepping already

Ghostlight
Sep 25, 2009

maybe for one second you can pause; try to step into another person's perspective, and understand that a watermelon is cursing me



this is one of those blind men and the elephant proverbs

Citcon
Aug 31, 2018

by R. Guyovich

Beet Goblin posted:

is this real?

legally speaking its been released since dec 2015. You spend money and receive a license to use the product. Alpha,beta,whatever means literally nothing legally.

SoftNum
Mar 31, 2011

It's not out or done but we're gonna cross it out anyway.

And man chris' voice doesn't sound like it should come from his face.

I mean, legally speaking people were promised a product with certain features and are entitled to that product or their money back before delivery. That's how this works. hth

Thoatse
Feb 29, 2016

Lol said the scorpion, lmao
next big pillar: BUYING SHIPS

Beet Wagon
Oct 19, 2015





confirmed, the game loop is "make money, buy bigger ship"

boyo all those guys making GBS threads on Elite are gonna have to do some gymnastics here

Orange Carlisle
Jul 14, 2007

7 years in and still saying "We still have to figure out how that will work"

Sarsapariller
Aug 14, 2015

Occasional vampire queen


Chris just promised full ship store and earning/persistence in 3.3

That'll be the promised date that will never, ever happen. One more off the list.

Sarsapariller posted:

some squares:

  • Prerendered cutscene is passed off as gameplay
  • Sale made exclusively available to people who bought a ticket
  • Livestream fails to start on time, by more than 10 minutes
  • Livestream is plagued by technical failures
  • Obviously heavily scripted in-game demo is performed by live employees with cheesy miltac speak
  • Chris shouts directions at poor beleaguered intern working the in-game camera controls
  • A flashy new feature is demo'd that will never, ever be released
  • A flashy new hardware or third-party app tie-in is demo'd that adds nothing to an already bloated product
  • Citizens do victory laps through this and other "Doubter" threads despite no significant feature release
  • Release (###) is rushed out for the con as a bug-riddled lovely mess, no one notices, it contains no significant features
  • (Free square) New Money Only
  • Chris makes at least one ill-advised new feature promise seemingly out of the blue during his presentation
  • Chris gives at least one obviously false upcoming date and Citizens latch onto it until it passes
  • Somehow the tracker passes 200m, giving them a big round number for shill articles
  • Squadron 42? What's that?
  • Sandi's twitter is composed of nothing but setup/take-down/community photos for the next two weeks, Sandi is not present in any shots
  • All of the sideshow streams are basically devs speculating on systems they have yet to develop
  • A BRAND NEW THING FOR SALE
  • ***
  • A BRAND NEW THING FOR SALE PT 2

Thoatse
Feb 29, 2016

Lol said the scorpion, lmao
Timeshare!

SoftNum
Mar 31, 2011

I'm the crossed out things that aren't done.

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Scruffyhawk
Jun 30, 2005

FHNNNNNNN
Ramrod XTreme
What exactly is he doing right now? Is this all poo poo that's got an actual release date or is it just more "here's a laundry list of poo poo we've been saying is coming for the last 5 years"?

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