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Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

oldpainless posted:

That’s a dumb name for your penis
more like oldmonkeybrainless

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zoux
Apr 28, 2006

https://twitter.com/FINALLEVEL/status/1051827407500582912

THis man is wise

40-Degree Day
Sep 24, 2012


Ice T is a loving legend

zoux
Apr 28, 2006

https://twitter.com/JordanUhl/status/1051684778288787458

Lol, Who is this shadowy Robert and why does he make all the Rules

40-Degree Day posted:

Ice T is a loving legend

https://twitter.com/metaltango/status/1050848808110673920

You don't have to look that hard for them yall

zoux has a new favorite as of 16:17 on Oct 15, 2018

T-man
Aug 22, 2010


Talk shit, get bzzzt.

zoux posted:

https://twitter.com/JordanUhl/status/1051684778288787458

Lol, Who is this shadowy Robert and why does he make all the Rules


https://twitter.com/metaltango/status/1050848808110673920

You don't have to look that hard for them yall

What's on the WOMEN sign?

there wolf
Jan 11, 2015

by Fluffdaddy
gently caress everything else about the bathroom debate. Baby changing station signs should be made mandatory.

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

there wolf posted:

gently caress everything else about the bathroom debate. Baby changing station signs should be made mandatory.

No actual changing station required, just the sign.

Aramoro
Jun 1, 2012





They need to pass a motion that you're only allowed to use 1 size of font, jesus christ who are these anarchists?

Panfilo
Aug 27, 2011
Probation
Can't post for 16 hours!

there wolf posted:

gently caress everything else about the bathroom debate. Baby changing station signs should be made mandatory.

I support making it a law that they have to put the changing stations in both bathrooms and not just one, to ensure any parent is in a position to change their infant. I'm sure the Koala changing table company would appreciate the extra sales. The things fold up against the wall too, so they don't even take up more space.

Biplane
Jul 18, 2005

Panfilo posted:

I support making it a law that they have to put the changing stations in both bathrooms and not just one, to ensure any parent is in a position to change their infant. I'm sure the Koala changing table company would appreciate the extra sales. The things fold up against the wall too, so they don't even take up more space.

when my son was a year and a half I was yelled at in a restaurant for changing his diaper in the womens bathroom. It was the only one with a changing station! misandry is real #MRA

SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

zoux posted:

https://twitter.com/metaltango/status/1050848808110673920

You don't have to look that hard for them yall

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

MizPiz
May 29, 2013

by Athanatos
What are the odds of the bathroom laws being revoked when people start pushing for changing stations in the men's room? It just seems like a sequence of events that could happen.

christmas boots
Oct 15, 2012

To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out
Biscuit Hider
At a minimum I would favor a law mandating that all single occupancy bathrooms be gender neutral because honestly now

Arivia
Mar 17, 2011

fruit BOO!ts posted:

At a minimum I would favor a law mandating that all single occupancy bathrooms be gender neutral because honestly now

but but

then the walls of gender will break down! EVERYTHING WILL BE ANARCHY BECAUSE A PERSON WITH DIFFERENT GENITALS WAS IN THIS ROOM

oldpainless
Oct 30, 2009

This 📆 post brought to you by RAID💥: SHADOW LEGENDS👥.
RAID💥: SHADOW LEGENDS 👥 - It's for your phone📲TM™ #ad📢

It’s not fair only men get to experience the magnificence of my bowel movements when I leave without flushing.

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011

oldpainless posted:

It’s not fair only men get to experience the magnificence of my bowel movements when I leave without flushing.

More like oldfiberless

zoux
Apr 28, 2006

Bird mod don't read this post

https://twitter.com/redditships/status/1051876854062358533

....or was it burder.

https://twitter.com/redditships/status/1051880924764364801

Tardcore
Jan 24, 2011

Not cool enough for the Spider-man club.
That is some straight up Misery poo poo

oldpainless
Oct 30, 2009

This 📆 post brought to you by RAID💥: SHADOW LEGENDS👥.
RAID💥: SHADOW LEGENDS 👥 - It's for your phone📲TM™ #ad📢

Ah I see you read my posts

Accordion Man
Nov 7, 2012


Buglord
Cockatoos are kind of big birds, you're probably not going to "accidentally" step on one and kill it.

She straight up murdered that poor bird in cold blood.

zoux
Apr 28, 2006

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BB4Qhtuxe6A

seiferguy
Jun 9, 2005

FLAWED
INTUITION



Toilet Rascal

Accordion Man posted:

Cockatoos are kind of big birds, you're probably not going to "accidentally" step on one and kill it.

She straight up murdered that poor bird in cold blood.

Also those birds generally don't walk around on the floor. With the way she becomes so heartless in the comments, it's almost a certainty she killed it.

big dyke energy
Jul 29, 2006

Football? Yaaaay
"I'm not abusive!!" *Every post is straight out of abusive behavior.txt*

That poor guy (and bird) hope he knows to loving RUN.

AlbieQuirky
Oct 9, 2012

Just me and my 🌊dragon🐉 hanging out

Ice T's Twitter is a goddamned delight. The time someone was giving him poo poo about eating breakfast at Denny's and he responded with something like, "Do you think there are special millionaire eggs?" and then the Denny's account chimed in...it was chef's kiss perfection.

Air Skwirl
May 13, 2007

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

there wolf posted:

gently caress everything else about the bathroom debate. Baby changing station signs should be made mandatory.

The madness to me is when restaurants or bars only have single occupancy bathrooms but still have gendered signs, and again of course only the women's room has a changing table.

Dienes
Nov 4, 2009

dee
doot doot dee
doot doot doot
doot doot dee
dee doot doot
doot doot dee
dee doot doot


College Slice

I mean, all signs point to it being a complete, unavoidable accident:
-She had a strong motive to kill the bird
-The circumstances around the death hinge on the bird acting completely differently than it should
-She felt there'd be no repercussions to killing the bird
-She has a history of unrepentant abusive and controlling behavior
-She doesn't seem to understand the idea of 'empathy'
-She's hiding as much as she can about the incident

Totally an accident. I hope they work it out.

Air Skwirl
May 13, 2007

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

Jesus gently caress. He has an "unhealthy" attachment to a pet he's had more than a decade. Run dude, run.

LITERALLY A BIRD
Sep 27, 2008

I knew you were trouble
when you flew in

There is absolutely no way she is telling the truth. The only way I would possibly believe she accidentally stepped on a loving cockatoo is if it were accompanied by photos of her missing/mutilated toes as the parrot (which by her own version of events did not die on impact) whipped around to sink its beak into whatever had assaulted it in the dark, as parrots do.

e: I mean, and, you know, all the other signs she's lying :downs:

LITERALLY A BIRD has a new favorite as of 19:55 on Oct 15, 2018

Pharohman777
Jan 14, 2012

by Fluffdaddy
https://twitter.com/IAmAllenBot/status/1051332315018866689

Click on the image to get the full text, but :staredog:

Pharohman777
Jan 14, 2012

by Fluffdaddy
Regarding that abusive girlfriend, this is pretty horrid.

https://twitter.com/MoMoPlaysPoke/status/1051890285251158017

LITERALLY A BIRD
Sep 27, 2008

I knew you were trouble
when you flew in

It's not much of a silver lining but I really really hope the death of his pet/companion is enough impetus for him to GTFO, holy crow

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Me too, this poor gentle bird-man deserves someone who will coo at birds with him. This woman deserves to be locked in a room and stepped on herself.

Admiral Joeslop
Jul 8, 2010




Absurd Alhazred posted:

I knew someone who would refer to some people as NPC's all the way back in the mid-oughts. Incidentally, they were a psychopath.

Unrelated (?):

https://twitter.com/sydneypaige34/status/1050147108974747648

\

She's opened her account back up, is doubling down, and the white knights have charged in.



Cockatoo chat: I seriously doubt this guy would have left the house with the cockatoo out of its cage. I live with one and she would destroy everything in the house, down to the foundation, if she were left out of the cage alone. And the other pets would be dead. Also there would be horrible constant screaming if someone wasn't in the room with her to pay attention.

please send help

SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

That bird murderer is a straight up monster. I wouldn't be able to handle being around someone who hates animals that much. Having an animal adore you is one of the most wholesome and wonderful things in the world and that made me genuinely angry to read. I don't even have a bird so I had to pet my cat sitting next to me instead.

LITERALLY A BIRD
Sep 27, 2008

I knew you were trouble
when you flew in

he's a good cat Princess

zoux
Apr 28, 2006

Dienes posted:

I mean, all signs point to it being a complete, unavoidable accident:
-She had a strong motive to kill the bird
-The circumstances around the death hinge on the bird acting completely differently than it should
-She felt there'd be no repercussions to killing the bird
-She has a history of unrepentant abusive and controlling behavior
-She doesn't seem to understand the idea of 'empathy'
-She's hiding as much as she can about the incident

Totally an accident. I hope they work it out.

The 15 man squad that included a forensic pathologist and bone saw going into the residence tipped me off

AlbieQuirky posted:

Ice T's Twitter is a goddamned delight. The time someone was giving him poo poo about eating breakfast at Denny's and he responded with something like, "Do you think there are special millionaire eggs?" and then the Denny's account chimed in...it was chef's kiss perfection.

Some celebs are just unaccountably good at twitter. Chrissy Teigen. Cher. Ken Jennings.

zoux has a new favorite as of 20:27 on Oct 15, 2018

Mushika
Dec 22, 2010

I couldn't read the entire cockatoo thing. I think I would get too pissed off. My parents have had a cockatoo for many years that is a giant crazy, sweet princess. When I visit, if I've been in the room too long with out paying enough attention to her, she goes in to "pay attention to me!" display mode where she acts and sounds like a raging 15 foot tall dinosaur until I walk over to her. She immediately goes into "I love you!" mode and grabs my hand and starts looking all demure, making cooing noises while I pet and talk to her. She doesn't like to let me go.

So, yeah. That lady was probably a loving burderer.

edit: I read the entire thing and I regret it.

Mushika has a new favorite as of 20:32 on Oct 15, 2018

zoux
Apr 28, 2006

https://twitter.com/piersmorgan/status/1051707168490221568

TIL his wife is Rachel Weisz and she's 48 and I thought that was way too old to have kids

Away all Goats
Jul 5, 2005

Goose's rebellion

IoSM: She will clarify that I love all Jews

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nashona
May 8, 2014

Though she be but little, she is fierce


zoux posted:

https://twitter.com/piersmorgan/status/1051707168490221568

TIL his wife is Rachel Weisz and she's 48 and I thought that was way too old to have kids

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