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Blade Runner
Aug 14, 2015

Smirking_Serpent posted:

Boyfriend and I slept through gas leak that evacuated our entire building except us. Landlady basically said if we don't like it we could move out.
This happened in Ontario, Canada.

So this past Friday, our entire apartment building was evacuated after a "bum like person" (landlady's words) broke into the building and busted a gas pipe at around midnight.

I found out about it the next night at work (I work across the street from our building and we're open pretty late) when my coworker asked where my boyfriend and I were the night before. He filled me in on what had happened and that everyone was outside, there were fire trucks, cops, the works.

For more context, on the 24th of October a fire marshal inspected our alarm that's connected to the building and said it needed to be replaced. It has yet to be replaced and when my boyfriend confronted our landlady via text she refused to give us a copy of order for our replacement alarm, blamed us for not hearing the commotion and waking up (I sleep with ear plugs and boyfriend is a heavy sleeper) didn't apologize, and told us if we don't feel comfortable she'd make arrangements for us to move out.

All we asked for was the alarm for our unit. Luckily neither us or our cats are hurt or anything, but if the gas leak had been anymore serious we could've died in our sleep that night.

Boyfriend's dad is a real estate agent and the first thing he cited was the law that landlords need to have an evacuation plan for all tenants and units.

I dislike confrontation and feel like we were too harsh in our texts, but we could have died if it were more serious. My dad is telling me to report the landlady to the tenant tribunal or the fire department. But I don't know. Came here for advice from third parties or someone who knows more about tenant law in Ontario.

EDIT: More direct questions; should we pursue action and report? If we do pursue reporting them, could they evict us? I know it wouldn't be legal for them to evict us over reporting them, but the fear is still in my mind. I could also post the screen shots of the text conversation if anyone would like to read them.

TLDR: Boyfriend and I were only tenants not evacuated during a gas leak and landlady refuses to acknowledge the seriousness of the situation. Basically told us she'd rather us move out than fix our alarm.

This landlord may actually be retarded but god drat is a lawyer somewhere getting a huge boner for reasons unknown to him

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La Brea Carpet
Nov 22, 2007

I have no mouth and I must post
My[~30M] wife[~30F] talks about me in her Facebook Dog group.

quote:

My wife has a close group of friends she met on Reddit. They now talk/post in a Facebook "group". I don't have facebook anymore and don't really understand groups, but I do know that she's in one. She's really into dogs and dog training. It is a big hobby of hers and I have been supportive of it. She works but it's largely my income that allows her to have the dogs she does and do the activities she does with them (everything is very expensive in the dog world, including classes and entering competitions...not to mention all the equipment). I even surprised her with a "dog car" that would fit our dogs and had it fitted with a very nice, crash tested crate.



I love the dogs and I love my wife. I believe I have been very supportive of her hobby even though I don't necessarily want to participate in the hobby myself. I thought things were good as they were. I will come to her events to help her carry stuff and be moral support.



I recently was using her computer and her facebook page was open. It was opened on a picture of our dog so I looked and immediately realized I was reading something she obviously did not intend for me to read. Because it was about me. I went against better judgement, read the whole things, read the comments and my wife's replies, and then went through the group to read everything else she had posted about me.



I feel really upset by what I read. I am often the bunt of her jokes. She often complains about me and portrays me in a negative light. On many occasions she says I am "clueless" about the dogs and that she makes all dog related decisions. Says many times that she only lets me believe I have a say in what breed we choose. There are posts mocking my interactions with the dogs and saying I have no clue how to interact with them. This is really just untrue. I grew up with dogs, I had dogs before I met my wife. She did not introduce me to the concept of dogs. She has owned dogs for fewer years than I have. Do I do agility or show my dogs? No, but I care for them, exercise them, play with them, and love them. I don't think that's anything to mock



She also complains a LOT about my parents. I get it, there's a whole joke about your inlaws. But my parents have never been anything but kind to her and it is upsetting to see her talk about them this way and make up lies about them in order to get more likes and sympathy on her post. She also exaggerated many of her/the dogs accomplishments.



Additionally, she is involved in a sex related facebook group derived from the same dog group. Which is fine, everyone allowed to talk about sex if they want to but it makes me uncomfortable that she's been active in this group for a long time and never mentioned it to me. She discusses our sex life in a lot of detail and maybe this part is wrong of me but it makes me uncomfortable that these women around the country (that I've met before) know all these details about my penis and exactly how I gently caress my wife.



I haven't said anything to my wife. I know she'll be mad that I read her Facebook. I would like some advice for how to deal with this and how to deal with anger and the betrayal I feel given she acts very happy and in love around me, only to speak so negatively of me online. Maybe I have nothing to be mad about and I know I hosed up by reading her personal Facebook group. I would like some insight on how to proceed



Editing to add that we have been married 2 years



**TL;DR: read wife's dog facebook where she complains and mocks me to her friends**

TehRedWheelbarrow
Mar 16, 2011



Fan of Britches
poor dude.

he sounds so drat hurt :smithfrog:

number 1 snake fan
Jul 16, 2018


Lol this is just typical lesbian overthinking

Barudak
May 7, 2007

im not saying fraud but Ive never met a Chinese person who would ever willingly refer to Jiaozi as gyoza unless they were actively infiltrating the Japanese government and even them they might blow cover

Edgar Allan Pwned
Apr 4, 2011

Quoth the Raven "I love the power glove. It's so bad..."

La Brea Carpet posted:

My[~30M] wife[~30F] talks about me in her Facebook Dog group.

eehh. it is childish of her, but like clearly she needs a place to vent, and dogs also seem to be where she is most confident so im not surprised she bitches about him in a face book group about his alleged incompetency with dogs.

it got weird when there was a sub sex group but it seems like its only chicks... idk this seems pretty normal to me, the only issue is that she needs to put him down to feel good about herself.

we all dump our personal issues into some crevice in the Internet, lets thank god it was a wholesome community of dog training

A Wizard of Goatse
Dec 14, 2014

poo poo-talking friends and family behind their backs is a scumbag move. poo poo-talk them to their face, and then make up a wholly fabricated life and persona to complain about online for the facebook upvotes.

tactlessbastard
Feb 4, 2001

Godspeed, post
Fun Shoe

Edgar Allan Pwned posted:

eehh. it is childish of her, but like clearly she needs a place to vent, and dogs also seem to be where she is most confident so im not surprised she bitches about him in a face book group about his alleged incompetency with dogs.

it got weird when there was a sub sex group but it seems like its only chicks... idk this seems pretty normal to me, the only issue is that she needs to put him down to feel good about herself.

we all dump our personal issues into some crevice in the Internet, lets thank god it was a wholesome community of dog training

I think it's pretty hosed up to talk poo poo about your spouse on the internet, especially on Facebook. Closed group or not.

Warbadger
Jun 17, 2006

tactlessbastard posted:

I think it's pretty hosed up to talk poo poo about your spouse on the internet, especially on Facebook. Closed group or not.

Yep. Especially if you make poo poo up about them.

MarcusSA
Sep 23, 2007

tactlessbastard posted:

I think it's pretty hosed up to talk poo poo about your spouse on the internet, especially on Facebook. Closed group or not.

Yeah this.

Like reading what the guy wrote I could really feel for him.

Its pretty hosed up what she is doing and its a huge lack of respect for him and the marriage.

Chicken Doodle
May 16, 2007

I like using Facebook to share my day with close friends when something neat happens. But for the first year of our relationship I never ever mentioned who my partner was, or many details at all besides where we went. I asked him for permission before I started including his name, and even then I don’t exactly post intimate details of our sex lives or bitch about things he did. It’s just loving common human decency.

Ah who am I kidding, this is Reddit. There are no humans there.

Pirate Radar
Apr 18, 2008

You're not my Ruthie!
You're not my Debbie!
You're not my Sherry!

Barudak posted:

im not saying fraud but Ive never met a Chinese person who would ever willingly refer to Jiaozi as gyoza unless they were actively infiltrating the Japanese government and even them they might blow cover

Other than that it’s the single most believable r/relationships post ever made

Clark Nova
Jul 18, 2004

Edgar Allan Pwned posted:

it got weird when there was a sub sex group but it seems like its only chicks... idk this seems pretty normal to me, the only issue is that she needs to put him down to feel good about herself.

He should feel extremely blessed that she is talking about his weird dick and not weird dog dicks

A Wizard of Goatse
Dec 14, 2014

that's her Tumblr dumdum, nobody talks about that poo poo on Facebook

loquacius
Oct 21, 2008

Everybody hates when I constantly say nice things about my wife on the Internet and never shut up, so I guess it would make sense that constantly talking poo poo about your spouse on the Internet would get you likes and comments and LOL reactions

tactlessbastard
Feb 4, 2001

Godspeed, post
Fun Shoe

loquacius posted:

Everybody hates when I constantly say nice things about my wife on the Internet and never shut up, so I guess it would make sense that constantly talking poo poo about your spouse on the Internet would get you likes and comments and LOL reactions

Yeah, that's just garden variety obnoxious.

Danaru
Jun 5, 2012

何 ??
When my boyfriend does something to upset me, I generally talk to HIM about it rather than needing to vent about it to a bunch of online randos. Maybe I'm the weird one

Freudian
Mar 23, 2011

Danaru posted:

When my boyfriend does something to upset me, I generally talk to HIM about it rather than needing to vent about it to a bunch of online randos. Maybe I'm the weird one

If people didn't vent to online randos about their problems then we wouldn't have this thread.

Danaru
Jun 5, 2012

何 ??

Freudian posted:

If people didn't vent to online randos about their problems then we wouldn't have this thread.

That's fair, honestly

zakharov
Nov 30, 2002

:kimchi: Tater Love :kimchi:
another winner from Prudie

quote:

Q. Body image: My wife is well-endowed and skinny but is ashamed of her body. We’ve been married 30 years and now have an empty nest. I’m trying to spark a little fire and honestly I want to enjoy her body. I have bought her some low-cut shirts and dresses and have told her it would make me happy if she would occasionally wear them, like once in a while on a Friday night. She refuses to even try them on. She says she will buy her own clothing, but it has been about a year since I first asked her and she’s done nothing. It’s like having a fabulous bottle of wine put on the table every night and being told you can’t drink it. Thoughts? Ideas? Web sites?

quote:

A: Your wife’s body is not a bottle of wine; it’s her body. Her body is not a consumable good designed to be enjoyed by someone else and then filed away as a treasured memory—it’s what she lives in. She doesn’t want to wear the clothes you bought her. While there may be some people who enjoy being dressed up by their husband of 30 years, my guess is that she feels pressured and ignored by the outfits you got her and turned off by your repeated attempts to wear her down. You need to let it go. You’ve spent the last year trying to get what you want from her in your empty nest; I think you should knock it off and ask her what’s something she’d like to do. The answer may have nothing to do with sex or dressing up for you, and you should pay attention to whatever she says. It doesn’t sound like you’ve been listening very attentively in the past, and I encourage you to change that habit, lest you find your empty nest even emptier.

tactlessbastard
Feb 4, 2001

Godspeed, post
Fun Shoe

zakharov posted:

another winner from Prudie

Yeah but if his wife didn't feel great about her body and he said yeah I see why you feel that way then he'd also be the rear end in a top hat so what exactly is he supposed to do? Start loving his way through the secretary pool?

A Wizard of Goatse
Dec 14, 2014

loquacius posted:

Everybody hates when I constantly say nice things about my wife on the Internet and never shut up, so I guess it would make sense that constantly talking poo poo about your spouse on the Internet would get you likes and comments and LOL reactions

It just reminds me of the coworker I used to have whose favorite conversational topics were his stupid nagging bitch of a wife and how great an idea it'd be if the government would declare a "caveman day" (basically, the Purge before the Purge movies came out) so he could rape who he wanted and murder his stupid nagging bitch of a wife. I don't think anyone ever responded positively to this once, but he still kept bringing it up

Burt Sexual
Jan 26, 2006

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Switchblade Switcharoo

tactlessbastard posted:

Yeah but if his wife didn't feel great about her body and he said yeah I see why you feel that way then he'd also be the rear end in a top hat so what exactly is he supposed to do? Start loving his way through the secretary pool?

Are you serious?

zakharov
Nov 30, 2002

:kimchi: Tater Love :kimchi:

tactlessbastard posted:

Yeah but if his wife didn't feel great about her body and he said yeah I see why you feel that way then he'd also be the rear end in a top hat so what exactly is he supposed to do? Start loving his way through the secretary pool?

Are you not seeing the difference between thinking your wife is beautiful and telling her so and trying to dress her up like a doll

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

It just reminds me of the coworker I used to have whose favorite conversational topics were his stupid nagging bitch of a wife and how great an idea it'd be if the government would declare a "caveman day" (basically, the Purge before the Purge movies came out) so he could rape who he wanted and murder his stupid nagging bitch of a wife. I don't think anyone ever responded positively to this once, but he still kept bringing it up

unleash mastodons and saber toothed tigers into the streets and turn off the electricity

My Linux Rig
Mar 27, 2010
Probation
Can't post for 6 years!

tactlessbastard posted:

Yeah but if his wife didn't feel great about her body and he said yeah I see why you feel that way then he'd also be the rear end in a top hat so what exactly is he supposed to do? Start loving his way through the secretary pool?

nah if she refuses to put on the dress and gently caress him like a porn Star then he should get a gun and just rape her at gun point cause he complimented her and is owed sex now

blarzgh
Apr 14, 2009

SNITCHIN' RANDY
Grimey Drawer

LadyPictureShow posted:

My(22F) fiance(29M) of 4 years is a major mamas boy, and now I have sooo much resentment toward his mom(53F) BTW. We currently live with her, and yes he pays the rent himself. So she’s basically living with us.

I’m going to be spending the rest of my life with him

No, you're not.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.
Also, thought of you people:

Ariong posted:

My [57M] ex-BF [62M] turned most of my robots evil. What should I do?

blarzgh
Apr 14, 2009

SNITCHIN' RANDY
Grimey Drawer

La Brea Carpet posted:

My[~30M] wife[~30F] talks about me in her Facebook Dog group.

Wow what a bitch, putting her husband in such a hairy situation. That's what he gets for digging I guess ok this bit sucks

Pirate Radar
Apr 18, 2008

You're not my Ruthie!
You're not my Debbie!
You're not my Sherry!

Ghost Leviathan posted:

unleash mastodons and saber toothed tigers into the streets and turn off the electricity

You can recreate this for yourself any day you want if you’re slick enough to sneak into a safari park after hours

Beachcomber
May 21, 2007

Another day in paradise.


Slippery Tilde

LadyPictureShow posted:

My(22F) fiance(29M) of 4 years is a major mamas boy, and now I have sooo much resentment toward his mom(53F) BTW. We currently live with her, and yes he pays the rent himself. So she’s basically living with us.

Wait just a goddamn minute.


quote:

I (22F) am in love with a mamas boy (29m). His mom was a single mom, and he grew up with him, his mom, and his older brother. I’m guessing this is why he is soo close to his mother.(53f) Honestly, they’ve lived in this house for 4 years now, and i moved in with them 3 years ago. So I was the one who moved in with them first, not his mom. He does pay all of the rent though. BTW we have a 9 month old now. 

SOME OF THE THINGS THEY DO WHICH BOTHER THE HELL OUT OF ME. His mom will walk around and get out of the shower naked in front of him. She won’t even have any modesty and grab a towel before getting into the shower, she’ll just run out naked in front of him. She’ll vacuum the floor in her panties like she’s the wife. Honestly I moved in here after she was already living here with him, so it’s basically her house so I just stay in the bedroom with my 9 month old. 



Also, "please wear this dress once" is not a big ask, so their relationship must be all kinds of hosed up.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.

Pirate Radar posted:

You can recreate this for yourself any day you want if you’re slick enough to sneak into a safari park after hours

Add nudity and a brutal hangover and you have movie material

Drunk Nerds
Jan 25, 2011

Just close your eyes
Fun Shoe
I too have complaints about my skinny, hot wife

Veni Vidi Ameche!
Nov 2, 2017

by Fluffdaddy
Q: Honey, after thirty years of marriage, I still love your body, and think you're hot, and would love for you to show off to me.

A: You piece of trash. You utter loving scumbag. You gross loser.

A Wizard of Goatse
Dec 14, 2014

The fine wine analogy was pretty gross but whatever they're both from like 1920, it was a different time

Wrath of the Bitch King
May 11, 2005

Research confirms that black is a color like silver is a color, and that beyond black is clarity.

Veni Vidi Ameche! posted:

Q: Honey, after thirty years of marriage, I still love your body, and think you're hot, and would love for you to show off to me.

A: You piece of trash. You utter loving scumbag. You gross loser.

Yeah, that's a weird one. I think people are reading into it that this dude just bothered the gently caress out of her for an entire year when it actually sounds like he mentioned it once.

Seems fairly reasonable to me, and there's some projection into it, like:

quote:

my guess is that she feels pressured and ignored by the outfits you got her and turned off by your repeated attempts to wear her down. You need to let it go. You’ve spent the last year trying to get what you want from her in your empty nest; I think you should knock it off and ask her what’s something she’d like to do.


Is just a bunch of poo poo that it's assumed he did for whatever reason. Maybe it was the fine wine comment that did it? It's a little gross.

La Brea Carpet
Nov 22, 2007

I have no mouth and I must post
I [24f] dated a man [40m], not knowing he was married. His wife [??f] is demanding I repay the $6,200 he spent on me

quote:

I knew a guy, Clarence, from my old job that I left about a year ago. I didn't know him well when I worked there, I worked with him occasionally but we didn't talk outside of work. He presented himself as single, didn't wear a ring or talk about a girlfriend or wife.

After I left that job, I went out for happy hour with my old coworkers a few times to catch up with some friends. Clarence was there, and after one of those events he asked me out. I accepted, but made it clear that I wasn't looking for anything serious or long term. I was in a transitional part of my life, spending a lot of time on my career, physical fitness, and general self improvement, so a relationship wasn't in the cards.

He was fine with that, and the first time we went out I suggested we go somewhere cheap, like the local dive bar with $2 beers and $6 meals, because I was on a tight budget. He said that he didn't want to go to a college bar, he was happy to treat me to something nicer. His idea of "nicer" was kind of ridiculous to me, each of my drinks cost $40... And that became a pattern, I'd suggest going somewhere within my budget so I could cover the bill for once, he'd refuse and take me somewhere mad expensive.

We were hooking up through all this btw.

He also started gifting me stuff, perfume, makeup, spa and massage and manicure vouchers, and wouldn't let me refuse. He'd say stuff like "I already bought this, what am I going to do with make up?" But I don't wear makeup much, or perfume, and I'm not super relaxed during massages because it's awkward being rubbed by a stranger. So I'd start quietly re-gifting those things to my female friends. The only thing that I kept was a designer coat.

I started feeling more and more uncomfortable, it felt like he was trying to buy my attention, and he wanted something more than casual hookups. My friends were making fun of me all the time for having a "sugar daddy". I felt like he wanted me to be something I'm not; all perfumed and made up, and dressed up for fancy dates, when I would have had more fun hanging out in a dive bar, or going and doing something active.

So I ended things, saying that it felt like he wanted me to be someone I'm not. He tried to get me to reconsider a few times, but I didn't. I thought that was all in the past, until I got a text from a stranger.

She said she was Clarence's wife, her name was Zoey, and she'd found out about me. She was pretty angry, calling me a homewrecker and cussing me out in a way I'd rather not repeat.

I told her I was really sorry, this was the first I'd heard about him being married, the few months he'd been taking me out, he'd presented himself as single. And I hadn't seen him in months, I'd ended things with him for my own reasons.

She sent me another bunch of texts, saying she didn't believe me, and saying I owed her $6,200. Apparently she had gone through the bank statements and tallied up everything he spent on me, over the months we were seeing each other. She said that the money he spent was their joint money, and I had no right to things bought with money that was their marital property. She hinted at taking legal action against me.

I haven't replied yet.

I don't have the money to give her. And while I feel awful he stole from her, and cheated on her with me... Honestly that was his decision, not mine.

I don't know whether to reply to her and say I don't have that kind of money laying around and I've regifted almost everything he gave me.

Or if I should contact Clarence and tell him he needs to sort out his own marital issues without dragging me into it.

Or if I should just ghost them both, and wash my hands of it all, unless I actually do hear from a lawyer? (Which I think is unlikely tbh)

TLDR - I dated an older man, I didn't know he was married. I broke things off for my own reasons. Several months later, his wife contacted me, demanding I repay the $6,200 he apparently spent on me.

QuarkJets
Sep 8, 2008

blarzgh posted:

No, you're not.

You don't know that

The creepy mom could kill her in her sleep

QuarkJets
Sep 8, 2008

Danaru posted:

When my boyfriend does something to upset me, I generally talk to HIM about it rather than needing to vent about it to a bunch of online randos. Maybe I'm the weird one

Apparently many of them aren't randos but are actually people they know irl. So it's basically her lying to her friends about her husband, which is weird

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therobit
Aug 19, 2008

I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

La Brea Carpet posted:

I [24f] dated a man [40m], not knowing he was married. His wife [??f] is demanding I repay the $6,200 he spent on me

Was this an r/relationships post or an r/legaladvice post?

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