- Blueberry Pancakes
- Aug 18, 2012
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Jack in!! MegaMan, Execute!
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Nov 4, 2018 08:05
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 29, 2024 15:27
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- Luffles
- Jul 25, 2007
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The Bird of Hermes Is My Name, Eating My Wings To Make Me Tame
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I saw what they did to Grandma. They could probably beat us up too!
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Nov 4, 2018 16:55
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- Snipee
- Mar 27, 2010
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I saw what they did to Grandma. They could probably beat us up too!
Solid logic. Let’s wait
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Nov 4, 2018 18:14
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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quote:
“Those guys aren’t human,” you tell Ginny and Chuck. You shudder. “I don’t want to try taking them on.”
You, Chuck, and Ginny scrunch down as low as you can behind the trunks. You try to not even breathe.
Then you hear the door slide open again.
Have they left? you wonder. Or did someone else come in?
Only one way to find out.
You crawl between packing crates and boxes, searching for signs of the creatures. As you slide along the floor, something hooks around your ankle.
CRASH! A large, rectangular mirror wrapped in plastic thuds to the floor right behind you.
Oh, no! Did those yellow-eyed creatures hear you? Are you about to be zapped?
quote:
You wait.
Nothing happens.
Phew! You let out your breath. The creatures must have left. You’re safe.
“Are you okay?” Chuck asks, rushing over. You sit up and untangle the packing twine that wraps around your ankle.
“We better move fast,” Ginny warns. “That crash was really loud. Someone might come to see what it was.”
“Yeah,” Chuck agrees. He helps you lift the mirror back upright. Luckily, it didn’t break. “So how are we going to break through the orange force field and grab your grandma?”
You scratch your head. “Hmmmmm,” you murmur. Then the mirror gives you an idea.
quote:
“Help me with this thing,” you instruct Chuck and Ginny. Together, the three of you unwrap the large mirror. Then you carry it over to your frozen grandma.
“If we find the right angle,” you explain, “we should be able to deflect the beams of the force field.”
“What are you doing in here?” a voice demands behind you.
Your head whips around.
They’re back! The two thugs in overcoats and sunglasses!
quote:
“Quick!” you shriek. “Lift!”
You, Chuck, and Ginny hoist the heavy mirror over your heads. It pierces the orange beam. The rays bend and bounce off the mirror – straight at the two thugs.
The two creatures stand frozen in place.
“It’s working!” you cry. “Grab Grandma!”
You lean the mirror against a luggage rack, aiming the beam directly at the creatures. Chuck and Ginny lift Grandma out of the chair. She’s still out cold, but at least you’ve rescued her from the force field.
“Out the back!” you shout. “Hurry!”
Chuck and Ginny drag Grandma out the back door. You follow right behind them.
Oops. You forgot you were in the last car.
“So, genius,” Ginny says as she strains to hold up Grandma. “Now what?”
quote:
You glance around, hoping for an idea. Your eyes land on a ladder leading to the top of the train.
“Up there!” You grab a rung and climb. At the top, you reach down and help lug up Grandma. Your muscles strain with the effort. Chuck and Ginny shove her from below as you yank her limp arms. Finally, you’re all gasping on top of the train.
“We don’t know how long that force field will hold,” you warn. “We better keep moving.”
The three of you drag Grandma across the car-tops. It’s tough going. You’re not sure if this was such a good idea.
“I’ll see if anyone is looking for us. “You scurry to the side of the train. “Grab my ankles.”
Ginny and Chuck grasp your ankles and lower you down headfirst. You peer into the train car window.
And gasp!
The train car is filled with people in sunglasses.
One of them notices you. He points and moves closer to the window. He pulls off his glasses to take a better look.
Yellow ping-pong-ball eyes!
quote:
“Pull me up! Pull me up!” you shriek. Ginny and Chuck lift you back on top of the train.
“They saw me! They know we’re up here!” you yell. “They’ll be after us any second!”
Ginny and Chuck stare at each other. Their faces are white with fear. Yours is too.
“We’re going to have a hard time escaping with your grandmother like that.” Chuck points to Grandma. She looks like a limp ragdoll.
“We can’t waste any time,” you urge. You peek over the side of the train again.
And stare into a pair of yellow eyes gazing up at you.
One of the creatures is leaning out the window.
Do something! Fast!
If you leap from the train before it's too late, turn to PAGE 10.
If you wake Grandma so you can try to crawl away, turn to PAGE 28.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Empty
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Ran face-first into the back of a garbage truck.
Eaten by a giant carnivorous rose.
Blown to bits by a bioengineered alien land mine.
Accidentally ate the alien eggs with implied disastrous results.
Caught spying and cocooned in acidic webbing.
Discovered our friends and their families were all disguised aliens, then got fed to a baby alien.
Achievements
False Start: Got a bad ending on our first choice of the book.
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Nov 5, 2018 01:58
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- Blueberry Pancakes
- Aug 18, 2012
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Jack in!! MegaMan, Execute!
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Jumping off of a moving train sounds silly.
Awaken the grandma.
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Nov 5, 2018 02:28
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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GRANDMA WAKE UP
*slaps grandma*
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Nov 5, 2018 06:39
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- Snipee
- Mar 27, 2010
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Jump from the train!
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Nov 5, 2018 10:07
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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quote:
“We’ve got to wake Grandma,” you tell the others. “We won’t be able to escape any other way.”
You, Ginny, and Chuck rush over to Grandma. You rub her hands and pat her face lightly. Finally, she comes around.
“My, my,” she murmurs. “What am I doing up here?”
You describe everything that has happened. She clucks and shakes her head. “I was afraid they might be onto me.”
Then Grandma tells you an amazing story.
She’s a secret agent specializing in alien investigations!
“I’ve been tracking the evil Mithra-Dithra,” she explains. “Obviously she assumed my identity. That’s why you saw two of us at the train station. And why those creatures captured me.”
Your head swims. This is unbelievable!
But you know your grandma is telling you the truth.
Grandma smiles at you. “You three did very well,” she says. “I have an assignment for you. If you dare.”
If you accept the assignment, turn to PAGE 34.
If you've had enough of aliens and danger, turn to PAGE 46.
What do you know, the title wasn't completely inaccurate after all!
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Empty
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Ran face-first into the back of a garbage truck.
Eaten by a giant carnivorous rose.
Blown to bits by a bioengineered alien land mine.
Accidentally ate the alien eggs with implied disastrous results.
Caught spying and cocooned in acidic webbing.
Discovered our friends and their families were all disguised aliens, then got fed to a baby alien.
Achievements
False Start: Got a bad ending on our first choice of the book.
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Nov 5, 2018 15:10
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- Blueberry Pancakes
- Aug 18, 2012
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Jack in!! MegaMan, Execute!
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Sure, let's save the world.
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Nov 5, 2018 15:13
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- Leraika
- Jun 14, 2015
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Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.
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Nah I want this game to make fun of us for being chickenshit instead
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Nov 5, 2018 15:32
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- Snipee
- Mar 27, 2010
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Nah I want this game to make fun of us for being chickenshit instead
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Nov 5, 2018 16:12
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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Leave and cry!
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Nov 5, 2018 16:14
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- AceOfFlames
- Oct 9, 2012
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Screw this, we're out of here.
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Nov 5, 2018 16:23
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- Luffles
- Jul 25, 2007
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The Bird of Hermes Is My Name, Eating My Wings To Make Me Tame
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we out grandma.
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Nov 6, 2018 03:11
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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All right let's actually do it this time.
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Nov 6, 2018 15:39
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- Blueberry Pancakes
- Aug 18, 2012
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Jack in!! MegaMan, Execute!
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Did Stine just SpongeBob meme us before that was even a thing?
Do it.
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Nov 6, 2018 23:29
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- Luffles
- Jul 25, 2007
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The Bird of Hermes Is My Name, Eating My Wings To Make Me Tame
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You gotta know when to hold em, and when to accept grandma's request to serve our.. country?
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Nov 7, 2018 01:00
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- Snipee
- Mar 27, 2010
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Why is the government making use of unpaid child soldiers in a secret war against aliens?
Anyways, sure why not. Grandma will protect us.
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Nov 7, 2018 08:56
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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quote:
Become an official investigator of aliens?
“You bet!” you exclaim. Ginny and Chuck nod enthusiastically.
“Great!” Grandma beams at you. “I’m going to go after Mithra-Dithra. But I need you to stay on this train.”
You try to hide your disappointment. “Can’t we go with you to defeat the evil alien?” you ask.
Grandma shakes her head. “I need you to track another set of aliens. You see, I discovered why there are so many aliens on this train. They’re all heading for a big meeting a few miles up.”
Chuck lets out a low whistle. “Like some kind of alien convention?” he asks.
“In a way.” Grandma smiles. “They meet every few years on a centrally located planet. This year, they’re coming to Earth.”
Ginny shutters. “To do what?”
Grandma leans forward. “That’s what I need you three to find out!”
quote:
You, Ginny, and Chuck arrive at the alien meeting. Grandma has given each of you a disguise. You think your two blue heads look really cool!
But, unfortunately, this assignment turns out to be totally boring.
It really is a convention. These aliens get together to vote on galaxy parking rules, real estate taxes, and planetary trade pacts.
It’s so dull, both of your blue heads fall asleep. The five-armed orange security guard has to throw you out. Your snoring is disturbing the guest speaker.
Oh, well. Sometimes even aliens turn out to be dull in
THE END.
I distinctly remember this choice being the first time I ever put down one of these books and thought "Well, gently caress you too." Still, we rescued Grandma and made it out alive and intact, so I'm not counting this as a bad ending.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Empty
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Ran face-first into the back of a garbage truck.
Eaten by a giant carnivorous rose.
Blown to bits by a bioengineered alien land mine.
Accidentally ate the alien eggs with implied disastrous results.
Caught spying and cocooned in acidic webbing.
Discovered our friends and their families were all disguised aliens, then got fed to a baby alien.
Got mocked out of the book for not wanting to go on an alien spy mission.
Achievements
False Start: Got a bad ending on our first choice of the book.
 Phantom Menace: Fell asleep listening to an extraterrestrial parliamentary debate.
Our options posted:
- Ask for help decoding the message.
- Introduce your friends to Grandma.
- Find and rescue your real Grandma.
- Call the authorities right away.
- Jump out the bedroom window.
- Ask Grandma what's going on.
- Tell someone on the train what you saw.
- Explain things to the conductor.
- Attack the yellow-eyed creatures.
- Jump off the train.
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Nov 8, 2018 01:11
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- Blueberry Pancakes
- Aug 18, 2012
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Jack in!! MegaMan, Execute!
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I was just about to say it'd be funny if they were just discussing taxes or something.
Attack!
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Nov 8, 2018 01:35
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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I....what?
Attack the creatures
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Nov 8, 2018 01:39
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- Luffles
- Jul 25, 2007
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The Bird of Hermes Is My Name, Eating My Wings To Make Me Tame
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I'm too dumb to figure out what empleh means. let's ask for help
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Nov 8, 2018 19:55
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- Snipee
- Mar 27, 2010
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I'm too dumb to figure out what empleh means. let's ask for help
Please, kind stranger, empleh, I don’t understand what it means.
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Nov 9, 2018 06:38
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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quote:
“I’ve got an idea,” you whisper.
You outline your plan to Chuck and Ginny. “Wait for my signal,” you say. They nod.
You grab a small box lying beside you and toss it to the other side of the compartment. The creatures’ heads whip around. Their bodies tense and they move toward the noise.
“Now!” you shout. You and Chuck jump up and grab the rungs of the overhead luggage rack. With a grunt, you swing up onto the rack. Bags and boxes tip over, landing on top of the thugs.
Chuck clambers up beside you. Together you bury the creeps with luggage. Ginny pelts them with parcels and bags.
“We’re winning!” you cry. “Keep throwing!”
Suitcases burst open as they hit the ground. Clothes fly everywhere. Bottles shatter and tubes ooze, spilling their contents all over the floor. But even in the chaos, your grandma sits staring straight ahead, imprisoned by the orange light.
“Rrrraaagghhhhhhh!” With a deafening roar the creatures explode out of the pile of luggage. They head straight for Ginny.
“Oh, no!” you shriek. Your eyes dart along the empty luggage racks. “We’ve run out of ammunition!”
quote:
“Ginny!” you shout. “Look out!”
Ginny scrambles over a pile of smashed suitcases. She trips on a broken crate and sprawls on the floor. “Help me!” she shrieks.
The yellow-eyed thugs stalk closer.
Chuck crawls along the luggage rack, hurling down the few remaining boxes. The creatures are inches from Ginny.
You have to help her! You swing your legs over the side of the rack and drop to the floor. “Leave her alone!” you scream.
The door behind you flies open. The conductor bursts in.
Great! You might have a chance now.
“Help us!” you beg the startled conductor. “You’ve got to help us, please!”
Your heart stops as his head explodes! Right in front of you!
quote:
“Aaahhhhhhh!” you shriek in horror.
Chuck falls to the ground, shaking with fear. Ginny sinks into the pile of bags.
You can’t tear your eyes from the terrifying sight. Flesh-colored globs splat onto the floor. Pieces of the conductor’s face dangle around his neck.
But even more revolting is the disgusting new head that rises from his conductor’s collar. A hairless, misshapen skull with lidless eyes. Yellow eyes. The size of ping-pong balls.
Tentacles shoot out from his sleeves. One wraps around your arm. The other grabs Ginny. A third bursts from the center of his chest. Right through the conductor’s uniform. It yanks Chuck to his feet.
The tentacle is working its way up your arm toward your face. You’ve got to do something! But what?
[i]If you haul off and punch the creature with your free hand, turn to PAGE 67.
If you bite the tentacles as hard as you can, turn to PAGE 47.
Well, that escalated quickly. Which is impressive, since our starting point was "grandmother kidnapped by aliens on a train and paralyzed with a force field".
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Empty
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Ran face-first into the back of a garbage truck.
Eaten by a giant carnivorous rose.
Blown to bits by a bioengineered alien land mine.
Accidentally ate the alien eggs with implied disastrous results.
Caught spying and cocooned in acidic webbing.
Discovered our friends and their families were all disguised aliens, then got fed to a baby alien.
Got mocked out of the book for not wanting to go on an alien spy mission.
Achievements
False Start: Got a bad ending on our first choice of the book.
Phantom Menace: Fell asleep listening to an extraterrestrial parliamentary debate.
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Nov 10, 2018 17:34
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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quote:
It would be useless to hit the powerful creature. Your fist is too small. It would feel like a gnat slugging an elephant.
But can you do it? Can you actually sink your teeth into that slimy tentacle?
You have no choice. It’s wrapping around your throat.
You shut your eyes and chomp down on the squirming flesh.
Hmmm. Not bad. Kind of tastes like chicken.
You dig your teeth in deeper. The creature howls and drops Ginny and Chuck. You hang on with your teeth. Flailing tentacles smash into the walls and the ceiling. The two other creatures duck out of the way as the tentacles flip around.
CRASH! A strange-looking piece of equipment falls to the floor. The orange light instantly shuts off.
The ex-conductor’s tentacles must have smashed the light that makes the force field, you realize. You glance at Grandma.
She blinks three times. She looks dazed.
The tentacled conductor-creature shrieks and writhes. But the two other creatures leap toward your grandma.
You release your teeth from the tentacle. “No!” you holler.
quote:
“Grandma! Look out!” you race toward her.
But Grandma doesn’t need any help! She leaps to her feet and assumes a karate stance. With a swift kick, she knocks one creature to the ground. It’s out cold.
The other creature jumps her from behind. Grandma bends sharply at the waist and flips the creature over her back. It falls in a crumpled heap.
With a howl, the conductor-creature reaches for grandma. But she’s ready for it. She ducks, then grabs one of its tentacles. She jerks the creature hard and it tumbles over. In a smooth move, she uses the tentacles to tie all three creatures together.
Your mouth drops open in awe.
“Whoa!” You let out a long, low whistle. “Some action!”
“That was awesome!” Ginny agrees.
“Totally!” adds Chuck.
Grandma beams at you. She rubs her hands together. “That was fun!” she exclaims.
You stare at her.
Is this amazing woman really your grandmother?
quote:
“What a mess!” Grandma glances around the wrecked baggage car. “Help me find my suitcases. Then we can get out of here.”
You spot a suitcase with your grandmother’s name on it. The top is popped open. Papers slide out of it onto the floor.
“Found one!” you call. As you place the papers back into the suitcase, several files catch your eye.
TOP SECRET! CONFIDENTIAL! SPECIAL GOVERNMENT DOCUMENTS! are stamped all over the files.
Grandma darts over and snatches the files out of your hands.
“Thanks,” she says. She shoves the papers into the suitcase and snaps the lid shut.
You stare at her. What is your grandmother doing with secret government files?
You’re about to ask her when the door flies open again.
“Thank goodness I found you before it’s too late!” a voice cries.
It’s the other Grandma!
quote:
“Stay away from her!” the new Grandma warns. “She’s evil!”
“Don’t listen to her,” the other Grandma yells. “She’s an imposter!”
Your head spins. Ginny’s gaze shoots back and forth between the identical Grandmas. Chuck stares with his mouth open so wide you can see the rubber bands on the inside of his braces.
Grandma #1 – the one who fought the three creatures – leaps into her martial-arts stance again. “Don’t mess with me,” she snarls.
The new Grandma – Grandma #2 – cowers by the door to the baggage compartment. “Oh, no!” she whispers. “She’s going to get me. She’ll get all of us!”
“Shut up, you fake!” Grandma #1 snaps. “These kids are too smart to fall for your act. Right?”
She gazes straight at you.
Which Grandma is your grandma?
If you think Grandma #2 is your real grandma, turn to PAGE 23.
If you choose Grandma #1, turn to PAGE 52.
To minimize confusion, Grandma #1 is the Grandma who beat up the aliens, and Grandma #2 is the one who just showed up. And no, I don't know why they chose to list Grandma #2 first.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Empty
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Ran face-first into the back of a garbage truck.
Eaten by a giant carnivorous rose.
Blown to bits by a bioengineered alien land mine.
Accidentally ate the alien eggs with implied disastrous results.
Caught spying and cocooned in acidic webbing.
Discovered our friends and their families were all disguised aliens, then got fed to a baby alien.
Got mocked out of the book for not wanting to go on an alien spy mission.
Achievements
False Start: Got a bad ending on our first choice of the book.
Phantom Menace: Fell asleep listening to an extraterrestrial parliamentary debate.
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#
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Nov 11, 2018 23:08
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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Obviously it's Grandma #1 and there's no way Goosebumps would suddenly shift reality just to make you lose!
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Nov 11, 2018 23:35
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- Blueberry Pancakes
- Aug 18, 2012
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Jack in!! MegaMan, Execute!
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Grandma #2.
Adults aren't allowed to be cool in Goosebumps.
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Nov 12, 2018 00:24
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- Leraika
- Jun 14, 2015
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Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.
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I want Karate Grandma to be my real grandma
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Nov 12, 2018 00:39
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- AweStriker
- Oct 6, 2014
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The real grandma is clearly Krav Ma-Grandma.
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Nov 12, 2018 07:22
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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Obviously it's Grandma #1 and there's no way Goosebumps would suddenly shift reality just to make you lose!
I can assure you, this time it's not going to suddenly shift reality to make us lose.
quote:
You rush to Grandma #1 and assume a martial-arts position just like hers.
“How could you, Cookie?” Grandma #2 wails. “Why would you choose that fiend over me, your sweet ol’ grandma?”
“My parents told me my grandma was unusual,” you explain. “And full of surprises.”
“That certainly describes me!” Grandma #1 boasts.
“And I don’t think my real grandma would call me that terrible nickname. Especially since I’m not a little kid anymore!” you finish.
Ginny and Chuck slap high fives. “Way to go!” Chuck cheers.
“Sorry,” Grandma #1 tells the other Grandma. “But don’t feel too bad about not being believed. The original is always better than the copy.”
Huh? What’s she talking about?
Before you can ask, three more women charge through the door.
More Grandmas!
quote:
The three new Grandmas chatter at once. “So there you are!”
“Hope number three didn’t cause trouble!”
“Is everyone all right in here?”
“What’s going on?” you scream.
Silence fills the train car.
All of the Grandmas stare at you. So do Chuck and Ginny.
“Excuse me for yelling,” you say. “But would someone please explain to me what’s happening here?”
Grandma #1 laughs. “I was just getting to that!” she tells you. “Allow me to introduce my clones.”
Then she explains the whole unbelievable story.
Your grandma is a top government scientist working on a secret cloning project. A project everyone seems to want to get their hands on! That’s why she’s coming to stay with you – to hide out.
You’re the luckiest kid in the world. For the next month you have five Grandmas. And they all spoil you!
THE END
Shifting reality to make your victory suddenly make no sense, on the other hand, is only natural!
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Empty
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Ran face-first into the back of a garbage truck.
Eaten by a giant carnivorous rose.
Blown to bits by a bioengineered alien land mine.
Accidentally ate the alien eggs with implied disastrous results.
Caught spying and cocooned in acidic webbing.
Discovered our friends and their families were all disguised aliens, then got fed to a baby alien.
Got mocked out of the book for not wanting to go on an alien spy mission.
Achievements
False Start: Got a bad ending on our first choice of the book.
Phantom Menace: Fell asleep listening to an extraterrestrial parliamentary debate.
Oodles of Octogenarians: Somehow got involved in a Grandma-cloning experiment.
Our options posted:
- Ask for help decoding the message.
- Introduce your friends to Grandma.
- Find and rescue your real Grandma.
- Call the authorities right away.
- Jump out the bedroom window.
- Ask Grandma what's going on.
- Tell someone on the train what you saw.
- Explain things to the conductor.
- Jump off the train.
- Punch the tentacled alien.
- Pick Grandma #2.
Gee, that sure is a lot of options we haven't picked! We should probably explore some of those, and I'm definitely not just saying that because we're getting way too close to the end and I'm trying to buy time to get more of a head start transcribing later books...
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Nov 12, 2018 15:32
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- AweStriker
- Oct 6, 2014
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Ask for help interpreting a request for help.
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Nov 12, 2018 15:43
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- Blueberry Pancakes
- Aug 18, 2012
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Jack in!! MegaMan, Execute!
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a-alright
Ask for help!
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Nov 12, 2018 16:15
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- Android Blues
- Nov 22, 2008
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Boy, oh boy! Five grandmas! We're the luckiest kid in the world!
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#
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Nov 12, 2018 16:19
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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#
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May 29, 2024 15:27
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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.....I got nothing.
Find and rescue your real grandma
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Nov 13, 2018 01:14
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Nov 4, 2018 08:05
