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fizzymercy posted:"I, as a white male of exception, have never felt pain worse than my own nor can I imagine someone lesser than me experiencing it. Therefore my pain must be the worst ever!" Right, that’s what I’ve been thinking.
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Nov 9, 2018 20:13
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As a cis woman, I get excruciating menstrual cramps monthly. It's like someone's digging out my stomach with a spoon, and I get them 3-4 days every month, without fail. I've heard stories about worse cramps, and better cramps, and overall: as I understand it, men have no equivalent.ToxicSlurpee posted:Pain is totally subjective so it could mean a lot of things. The argument I've heard is that women give birth so they have to be able to tolerate more pain by default. But pain being, you know, subjective makes it impossible to really figure out who does or does not hurt more. So in response to this, I don't know about childbirth, but boy howdy do cis women get to experience pain. StrixNebulosa has a new favorite as of 20:23 on Nov 9, 2018 |
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Nov 9, 2018 20:14
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some men have uteruses and some of them do experience cramps - I think you meant "cis men have no equivalent" which yeah. cis men and cis white men especially. caught in this thing where the message is that men have to be strong and manly and tough and therefore of course the pain men experience is the worst, because "Real Men Are Tough" and surviving pain is manly indeed (that thing they're caught in is called the patriarchy) ChickenOfTomorrow has a new favorite as of 20:20 on Nov 9, 2018 |
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Nov 9, 2018 20:16
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ChickenOfTomorrow posted:some men have uteruses and some of them do experience cramps - I think you meant "cis men" Yeah, you're right. I'm a cis women as well - not all women get cramps.
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Nov 9, 2018 20:18
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Pirate Radar posted:Right, that’s what I’ve been thinking. They don't understand that their experience is not at all universal. E: I had a doctor tell me that being in pain while having a miscarriage is no worse than getting kicked in the balls for hours. People have a difficult time understanding that there is no baseline for pain, and not all pain is experienced the same way. fizzymercury has a new favorite as of 20:21 on Nov 9, 2018 |
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Nov 9, 2018 20:19
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in part because society's message is that their experience _is_ universal. that's getting better over time (for certain values of "better" and "over time") but how many places do you see "man" as the default value. anything other than man is something you have to seek out - a "special" case.StrixNebulosa posted:Yeah, you're right. I'm a cis women as well - not all women get cramps. yeah for instance I have a uterus and don't get cramps because we stuck a piece of plastic in there. (it's an iud.) ChickenOfTomorrow has a new favorite as of 01:43 on Nov 10, 2018 |
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Nov 9, 2018 20:21
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fizzymercy posted:They don't understand that their experience is not at all universal. It's a failure of empathy. They literally can't imagine any mind that is different from theirs. Any experience different from theirs. If they hear of one, they just start inventing reasons why it isn't what it looks like. gently caress that doctor, what a tit.
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Nov 9, 2018 20:23
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ChickenOfTomorrow posted:in part because society's message is that their experience _is_ universal. that's getting better over time but how many places do you see "man" as the default value. anything other than man is something you have to seek out - a "special" case. Cue the old chestnut about how if cis men got menstrual flow, tampons and pads would be free. Instead I get to pay an invisible tax every few months so I have a supply. 
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Nov 9, 2018 20:24
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StrixNebulosa posted:As a woman, I get excruciating menstrual cramps monthly. It's like someone's digging out my stomach with a spoon, and I get them 3-4 days every month, without fail. I've heard stories about worse cramps, and better cramps, and overall: as I understand it, men have no equivalent. There isn't a direct equivalent but there are all sorts of horrid things that can go wrong with the body in general. From what I've heard cluster headaches are one of the most painful things in existence and mostly men get them. I get migraines and holy crap is it hard to explain to people how much those can suck. I have no idea how those compare to menstrual cramps though. Ive never had a cluster headache or a menstrual cramp so yeah. I'm just typing things about pain and I'm sorry you have to hurt that bad every month.
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Nov 9, 2018 20:30
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so if you're reading this and you're a cis man: first off, you have my sympathy for the number societal expectations and the patriarchy have done on you. second, when people who are not cis men disagree with you about what it's like to live in this world, please consider that your experience is not universal and it's entirely possible that someone who is not like you would experience things in a very different way to you. generally we're not saying your experience is wrong, but that ours is different and we need you to appreciate that. (the example I often give is meeting someone off tinder: a common fear for cis men might be "what if they're ugly" or "what if I embarrass myself" while for non-men the a common fear might be "what if I get murdered." cis men get murdered too and sometimes worry about it but I don't think it's usually a _common_ worry for the average cis man going on a tinder date)
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Nov 9, 2018 20:32
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fizzymercy posted:They don't understand that their experience is not at all universal. Yeah just generally I find that people have a lot of trouble accepting other people's experiences as valid if they're different than their own.
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Nov 9, 2018 20:39
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ToxicSlurpee posted:Pain is totally subjective so it could mean a lot of things. The argument I've heard is that women give birth so they have to be able to tolerate more pain by default. But pain being, you know, subjective makes it impossible to really figure out who does or does not hurt more. Doesn't the brain purposefully forget how much childbirth hurts so women will keep having babies? I swear I read that one time.
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Nov 9, 2018 20:50
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Wow a whole lotta people itt clearly never been kicked in the balls smh
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Nov 9, 2018 20:56
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fruit BOO!ts posted:Wow a whole lotta people itt clearly never been kicked in the balls smh I'd rather get kicked in the nuts than have a migraine.
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Nov 9, 2018 21:04
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ToxicSlurpee posted:There isn't a direct equivalent but there are all sorts of horrid things that can go wrong with the body in general. From what I've heard cluster headaches are one of the most painful things in existence and mostly men get them. I get migraines and holy crap is it hard to explain to people how much those can suck. I have no idea how those compare to menstrual cramps though. Ive never had a cluster headache or a menstrual cramp so yeah. I'm just typing things about pain and I'm sorry you have to hurt that bad every month. Ibuprofen, tylenol, and other painkillers are god's gift to man, and proof that we as a species have done something right.
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Nov 9, 2018 21:14
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ChickenOfTomorrow posted:yeah for instance I have a uterus and don't get cramps because we stuck a piece of plastic in there. uteruses function under the same rules and principles as alligators' jaws in old cartoons you can also stick a whole ham in there and immediately remove a perfectly clean bone
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Nov 9, 2018 21:14
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Speaking of sex, and unnerving things, longform.org has delivered again Death of a Kinkster: The death of a submissive man-pup and the scrotal silicone injection that killed him. quote:The reason may involve his scrotum. Hafertepen didn't respond to The Stranger's repeated attempts to contact him by e-mail (The Stranger verified we had his correct e-mail address from someone who knows him), and his phone number is not receiving incoming calls. But his Tumblr (as well as the Tumblr accounts of several of his pups) contained numerous images of their engorged scrotums, dramatically increased in size due to liquid silicone injections. In one picture, Tank's testicles dangle outside of his basketball shorts, his nuts roughly the size of two dodgeballs. Spoilered out for  content, think breast implants but for balls
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Nov 9, 2018 21:18
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ToxicSlurpee posted:I'd rather get kicked in the nuts than have a migraine. Ditto.
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Nov 9, 2018 21:24
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Pirate Radar posted:I obviously hate myself for saying this but I actually don’t understand what you mean here. Doesn’t the logic go the other way? White men are fragile therefore they believe other people must feel less pain than them? Yeah, I didn't phrase that clearly enough. The concept wraps around to being a dark self-own on the part of white men which is still, in true white man fashion, more dangerous to everyone else. I'm a straight, white, cis man, but have seen similar poo poo in action with my wife. It took 16 years and 4 doctors for her to get a gynecological deformity identified, but I'm sure if I had something similar in my dick, it would've been solved before I was old enough to remember it. Doctors absolutely treat women and minority populations differently than me, and that's hosed up and stupid. EDIT: StrixNebulosa posted:Death of a Kinkster: The death of a submissive man-pup and the scrotal silicone injection that killed him. There was a scrotal injection scene in Warren Ellis's Crooked Little Vein. I read it in college while waiting for a class to start and was choking back laughter the entire time, hoping no one would ask me what I was laughing about because I really didn't want to have to describe it in a room full of strangers. OutOfPrint has a new favorite as of 21:30 on Nov 9, 2018 |
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Nov 9, 2018 21:25
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Oh poo poo, I recognized someone's name in that Death of a Kinkster article as a relatively famous coder. They talk about it a bit on their twitter (thread) NSFW cause there's a dick pic ofc
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Nov 9, 2018 21:43
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You might want to NWS that inflated dong.
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Nov 10, 2018 00:05
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ToxicSlurpee posted:There isn't a direct equivalent but there are all sorts of horrid things that can go wrong with the body in general. From what I've heard cluster headaches are one of the most painful things in existence and mostly men get them. I get migraines and holy crap is it hard to explain to people how much those can suck. I have no idea how those compare to menstrual cramps though. Ive never had a cluster headache or a menstrual cramp so yeah. I'm just typing things about pain and I'm sorry you have to hurt that bad every month. Gout is pretty terrible. I’ve considered cutting my big toe off during the more severe episodes. It can get so bad that a light sheet or even a breeze can cause excruciating pain. I’d rather pass another kidney stone than have another session of gout. I’m guessing cluster headaches and severe menstrual cramps are a step or two worse.
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Nov 10, 2018 01:17
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please the poo poo i have to take after eating two dozen spicy wings and washing it down with a pitcher of budweiser hurts worse than any little period ouchie
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Nov 10, 2018 02:34
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HORMELCHILI posted:please the poo poo i have to take after eating two dozen spicy wings and washing it down with a pitcher of budweiser hurts worse than any little period ouchie My advice to you is to not do that to yourself
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Nov 10, 2018 02:36
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HORMELCHILI posted:please the poo poo i have to take after eating two dozen spicy wings and washing it down with a pitcher of budweiser hurts worse than any little period ouchie Eat more fiber.
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Nov 10, 2018 02:40
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Pvt.Scott posted:Gout is pretty terrible. I’ve considered cutting my big toe off during the more severe episodes. It can get so bad that a light sheet or even a breeze can cause excruciating pain. I’d rather pass another kidney stone than have another session of gout. My dad had gout and was somehow proud of it “Do you know how actively awful you have to treat your body to be that malnourished?? In 2016? Wow!”
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Nov 10, 2018 03:06
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wanna hug the pain sufferers itt the only really excruciating pain I ever felt, I'm quite sure, had a psychosomatic component to it, because it only started after my grandmother came home from her brain surgery and she and Grandpa were living with my mother and me in a house that barely had room for two people and everything was loud and cramped and smelly and nobody knew it would spiral out into the years of 24/7 caregiving it became but lord, I wouldn't wish that pain on anyone, not even a little bit also, anyone here who has to deal with menstrual cramping: oddly enough, mine diminished significantly (although they were never that bad to start with) once I switched to using a cup, and they'll save you money in the long run
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Nov 10, 2018 03:10
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Aesop Poprock posted:My dad had gout and was somehow proud of it “It’s an affliction which comes from living well.”
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Nov 10, 2018 03:15
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ParserGirl posted:“It’s an affliction which comes from living well.” He’s in great shape in terms of exercise but he eats nothing but trash. He ate two butter cakes in New Jersey when we were at the beach like 5 years ago and then hiked for two hours and came back and had a heart attack and ate a loving cheesesteak when he got out of surgery getting like 4 stents put in
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Nov 10, 2018 03:19
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Pastry of the Year posted:uteruses function under the same rules and principles as alligators' jaws in old cartoons Wasn't this a lovely horror movie back in the 70s or something? Also, the worst pain I've ever had was getting an abscess debrided without painkillers, but my migraines came close. Other than that I'm lucky I guess because I either have stupid good tolerance for pain or just haven't had anything else really bad. Beyond toothaches, gently caress that poo poo and gently caress this human body gimme my robot stuff. Aesop Poprock posted:He’s in great shape in terms of exercise but he eats nothing but trash. He ate two butter cakes in New Jersey when we were at the beach like 5 years ago and then hiked for two hours and came back and had a heart attack and ate a loving cheesesteak when he got out of surgery getting like 4 stents put in My entire immediate family other than me were doing a really good job ceasing their smoking habits then my stepdad got diagnosed with brain cancer and everyone fell back into the habit immediately from the stress. Gonna give a real bitter laugh if he beats it and gets lung cancer later, tell you what.
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Nov 10, 2018 03:27
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Aleph Null posted:Eat more fiber. If the wings are the right level of spicy no amount of fiber is going to matter. "Dont do that to yourself " you might as well ask ballerinas not to run their body to the bone dancing. Aesthetic perfection is worth it
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Nov 10, 2018 03:55
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ParserGirl posted:“It’s an affliction which comes from living well.” It's not, necessarily. Some people just can't metabolize purines in moderate or even limited amounts. I know a vegan who got gout and had to stop eating legumes entirely (also lots of fruits and a few vegetables, including tomatoes).
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Nov 10, 2018 03:56
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HORMELCHILI posted:please the poo poo i have to take after eating two dozen spicy wings and washing it down with a pitcher of budweiser hurts worse than any little period ouchie Good username/post combo.
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Nov 10, 2018 04:17
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Aesop Poprock posted:My dad had gout and was somehow proud of it Your dad doesn't know how gout works. Maybe he was thinking of scurvy or rickets? Gout is when you can't metabolize purines properly and they build up in your joints, causing inflammation. Your diet can affect how often you get attacks but it has nothing to do with being malnourished. e: AlbieQuirky posted:It's not, necessarily. Some people just can't metabolize purines in moderate or even limited amounts. I know a vegan who got gout and had to stop eating legumes entirely (also lots of fruits and a few vegetables, including tomatoes). Yeah, being a vegan with gout sucks, because beans are a fantastic source of protein and vitamins but also a fantastic source of purines. SneezeOfTheDecade has a new favorite as of 04:30 on Nov 10, 2018 |
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Nov 10, 2018 04:28
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I get some weird version of cluster headaches and I wouldn't wish that level of pain on anyone. Your world basically collapses down to doing anything possible to lessen the pain even a little bit. The good news is that after like three years of trying over the counter and prescription meds I finally found one that works.
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Nov 10, 2018 04:38
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StrixNebulosa posted:Speaking of sex, and unnerving things, longform.org has delivered again I know we don't talk about the bird offsite but they actually have a very good thread on the murderer. Dylan is completely despicable (there's evidence that Jack died days before he sad he did).
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Nov 10, 2018 04:54
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AlbieQuirky posted:It's not, necessarily. Some people just can't metabolize purines in moderate or even limited amounts. I know a vegan who got gout and had to stop eating legumes entirely (also lots of fruits and a few vegetables, including tomatoes). I didn’t expect anyone to get the reference and I wasn’t disappointed.
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Nov 10, 2018 04:54
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ParserGirl posted:I didn’t expect anyone to get the reference and I wasn’t disappointed. What is the reference? Google turned up nothing for me.
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Nov 10, 2018 05:00
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Besesoth posted:Your dad doesn't know how gout works. Maybe he was thinking of scurvy or rickets? Gout is when you can't metabolize purines properly and they build up in your joints, causing inflammation. Your diet can affect how often you get attacks but it has nothing to do with being malnourished. My dad is one of those "if I think it's right than it's right" people but I also apparently didn't know how it works so I'm just as bad
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Nov 10, 2018 05:53
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I envy women who don't get horrible period pains every month. Fact: I was in my early 20s and didn't get that I had a week 14 miscarriage, because the pain was nothing compared to what I considered a normal period cramp. Only got that something might be wrong because of the blood. Still waited two more days before seeking help, because it really wasn't that bad pain or blood wise. So maybe it was just a light spotting? Which was when the doctors finally realised that maybe I hadn't been exaggerating about how bad my periods were. Turned out I have endometriosis. Had only been crying about the pain, and amount of blood since I was 14! Got my first period at 10, but around 13 was when it started getting horribly painful. I honestly believed the doctors message of "Everything is normal, you just have to learn to deal with normal pain". Hint: If you need to use two pads at the time, and change them every 3 hours, day and night, for 6-8 days? That is not normal, and absolutely counts as excessive bleeding. If you don't notice you have two broken toes because your tummy hurts more than your toes? This is not a normal pain level for periods.
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Nov 10, 2018 13:44
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