- crazy cloud
- Nov 7, 2012
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by Cyrano4747
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Lipstick Apathy
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lmao
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Nov 22, 2018 05:01
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 24, 2024 07:41
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- Smirking_Serpent
- Aug 27, 2009
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Not quite in topic but does anyone have that one post telling a woman to dump her air force fiance and graphically describing how their life will be hell
Go ask the career development folks at the MPF. Also pimp the TMO folks and ask them.
The final answer comes from one of those two sources. And in the end you have a 50/50 chance of being told the wrong thing anyway.
But you asked for thoughts, and after smoking a bowl and contemplating things, I had a thought I'd like to share with you.
Have you considered not marrying your fiancee?
I can count on one finger the number of guys that were USAF intel officers that I wouldn't line up outside the gas chambers if the fourth reich became a thing.
A few years from now, when you can't even stand to look at him without feeling a sense of extreme hatred and disappointment simultaneous to realizing that at 28 years old you spend 50% of your day thinking about becoming a divorcee, remember this advice: Run the gently caress away now.
Seriously, there is a 100% chance your fiancee is a tool and a loving nitwit. There is a 100% chance that he will be peer pressured into becoming a distilled version of fighter pilot gay bro'ness not by dudes that fly fighter jets, but other sperged out intel retard officers. He's going to start saying things like "Check, Rodge, Vector, Burner" and other associated lame as gently caress things, while also sometimes randomly wearing a flightsuit to work on Fridays despite his only flight time being the fam flight he poo poo his pants or puked his guts up during.
Also he's going to cheat on you. Oh man is he going to cheat on you. And there is a not too bad chance that it won't be with some good looking gal, but rather some dumb bitch enlisted intel girl that almost got a degree in psychology from her podunk state school before she decided she hated the taste of gargling frat sperm and dropped out and joined up to get a chance at being the hottest little twat in a windowless SCIF in Japan.
But don't worry about that breaking your heart, he'll never tell you. You'll be too busy caring for the 3-4 kids he demands you squeeze out in repayment to the base model BMW 3 series he's going to buy you when he gets to his second assignment at Tinker AFB.
When he's not deep dicking some borderline inbred dipshit Airman who's a civilian 5 and intel 12, he'll be lording over you how his job and career come first, and pray he doesn't make more money than you because that'll come up everytime you sigh audibly at the dinner table where you two will passive aggressively try to grind down each others will to live and breathe.
By this point as a captain he's going to be TDY 1-2 months a year, where he's getting half assed hand jobs from third tier strippers on excursions with the least socially inept enlisted guys in his flight-- this is probably the point where his raging alcoholism will be so clear and obvious to you that you two will start fighting every saturday before kick off when his colleges football team inevitably will take a beating. This fight won't stop until his next TDY when the sweet release of his toothless stripper infidelities and lack of home presence gives you time to bust out your big giant purple *BZZZZZ* friend whenever those walking talking pants making GBS threads machines you call children fall asleep long enough to let you deaden the nerves in your clitoris.
Soon after he'll take his third assignment, the one right before he pins on Major, and suddenly he'll be pressuring you into becoming a fundamentalist christian, and he'll delete all of his whores off of his facebook account and spend his home time posting image macros about 2nd amendment rights, and how jesus spoke english in the bible so these loving mexicans should too. At this point you two will be consigned to bi-annual loving, and only when you've drank enough cheap boxed wind to be able to stand the idea of him pounding away on you missionary style but still refusing to look you in the eyes.
This will also be the point when your oldest childs ADHD and pyromania are diagnosed, and one of your parents die. There is around a 85% chance one of you is going to be eating zoloft and klonopin out of loving pez dispensers, and waking up angry that the sweet release of death hasn't taken one of you out of this loveless hosed up marriage.
Somewhere in here the idea of swinging is going to come up casually as an almost joke when you are both in the blissful release of a nice drunken buzz, and one of you will actually be very open and interested in the idea. The other is going to wind up being an unhappy accomplice wondering why your partner wants to gently caress almost chubby guys with spray on tans, or watch the sacred hole through which your children came into this world be filled with all manner of different ethnicities of cock.
I'm late to bring this up, but sooner rather than later you're also going to screen positive for HPV, and your intel officer husband is going to take every bit of research skills he has from his job to convince you that you got it from donating blood or sitting on a toilet seat.
You didn't get it from the Red Cross or a trip to the shitter.
As it stands now though, you can walk the gently caress away and enjoy a life that I'm pretty sure would be better than the above. And you'll never have to see the inside of an officers wives meeting which is a lovecraftian hell that makes my description of your future seem like Charlie's trip through the chocolate factory.
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Nov 23, 2018 08:35
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- crazy cloud
- Nov 7, 2012
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by Cyrano4747
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Lipstick Apathy
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Go ask the career development folks at the MPF. Also pimp the TMO folks and ask them.
The final answer comes from one of those two sources. And in the end you have a 50/50 chance of being told the wrong thing anyway.
But you asked for thoughts, and after smoking a bowl and contemplating things, I had a thought I'd like to share with you.
Have you considered not marrying your fiancee?
I can count on one finger the number of guys that were USAF intel officers that I wouldn't line up outside the gas chambers if the fourth reich became a thing.
A few years from now, when you can't even stand to look at him without feeling a sense of extreme hatred and disappointment simultaneous to realizing that at 28 years old you spend 50% of your day thinking about becoming a divorcee, remember this advice: Run the gently caress away now.
Seriously, there is a 100% chance your fiancee is a tool and a loving nitwit. There is a 100% chance that he will be peer pressured into becoming a distilled version of fighter pilot gay bro'ness not by dudes that fly fighter jets, but other sperged out intel retard officers. He's going to start saying things like "Check, Rodge, Vector, Burner" and other associated lame as gently caress things, while also sometimes randomly wearing a flightsuit to work on Fridays despite his only flight time being the fam flight he poo poo his pants or puked his guts up during.
Also he's going to cheat on you. Oh man is he going to cheat on you. And there is a not too bad chance that it won't be with some good looking gal, but rather some dumb bitch enlisted intel girl that almost got a degree in psychology from her podunk state school before she decided she hated the taste of gargling frat sperm and dropped out and joined up to get a chance at being the hottest little twat in a windowless SCIF in Japan.
But don't worry about that breaking your heart, he'll never tell you. You'll be too busy caring for the 3-4 kids he demands you squeeze out in repayment to the base model BMW 3 series he's going to buy you when he gets to his second assignment at Tinker AFB.
When he's not deep dicking some borderline inbred dipshit Airman who's a civilian 5 and intel 12, he'll be lording over you how his job and career come first, and pray he doesn't make more money than you because that'll come up everytime you sigh audibly at the dinner table where you two will passive aggressively try to grind down each others will to live and breathe.
By this point as a captain he's going to be TDY 1-2 months a year, where he's getting half assed hand jobs from third tier strippers on excursions with the least socially inept enlisted guys in his flight-- this is probably the point where his raging alcoholism will be so clear and obvious to you that you two will start fighting every saturday before kick off when his colleges football team inevitably will take a beating. This fight won't stop until his next TDY when the sweet release of his toothless stripper infidelities and lack of home presence gives you time to bust out your big giant purple *BZZZZZ* friend whenever those walking talking pants making GBS threads machines you call children fall asleep long enough to let you deaden the nerves in your clitoris.
Soon after he'll take his third assignment, the one right before he pins on Major, and suddenly he'll be pressuring you into becoming a fundamentalist christian, and he'll delete all of his whores off of his facebook account and spend his home time posting image macros about 2nd amendment rights, and how jesus spoke english in the bible so these loving mexicans should too. At this point you two will be consigned to bi-annual loving, and only when you've drank enough cheap boxed wind to be able to stand the idea of him pounding away on you missionary style but still refusing to look you in the eyes.
This will also be the point when your oldest childs ADHD and pyromania are diagnosed, and one of your parents die. There is around a 85% chance one of you is going to be eating zoloft and klonopin out of loving pez dispensers, and waking up angry that the sweet release of death hasn't taken one of you out of this loveless hosed up marriage.
Somewhere in here the idea of swinging is going to come up casually as an almost joke when you are both in the blissful release of a nice drunken buzz, and one of you will actually be very open and interested in the idea. The other is going to wind up being an unhappy accomplice wondering why your partner wants to gently caress almost chubby guys with spray on tans, or watch the sacred hole through which your children came into this world be filled with all manner of different ethnicities of cock.
I'm late to bring this up, but sooner rather than later you're also going to screen positive for HPV, and your intel officer husband is going to take every bit of research skills he has from his job to convince you that you got it from donating blood or sitting on a toilet seat.
You didn't get it from the Red Cross or a trip to the shitter.
As it stands now though, you can walk the gently caress away and enjoy a life that I'm pretty sure would be better than the above. And you'll never have to see the inside of an officers wives meeting which is a lovecraftian hell that makes my description of your future seem like Charlie's trip through the chocolate factory.
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Nov 23, 2018 16:00
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- old.flv
- Jan 28, 2017
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A good lad who likes his Anna's.
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Go ask the career development folks at the MPF. Also pimp the TMO folks and ask them.
The final answer comes from one of those two sources. And in the end you have a 50/50 chance of being told the wrong thing anyway.
But you asked for thoughts, and after smoking a bowl and contemplating things, I had a thought I'd like to share with you.
Have you considered not marrying your fiancee?
I can count on one finger the number of guys that were USAF intel officers that I wouldn't line up outside the gas chambers if the fourth reich became a thing.
A few years from now, when you can't even stand to look at him without feeling a sense of extreme hatred and disappointment simultaneous to realizing that at 28 years old you spend 50% of your day thinking about becoming a divorcee, remember this advice: Run the gently caress away now.
Seriously, there is a 100% chance your fiancee is a tool and a loving nitwit. There is a 100% chance that he will be peer pressured into becoming a distilled version of fighter pilot gay bro'ness not by dudes that fly fighter jets, but other sperged out intel retard officers. He's going to start saying things like "Check, Rodge, Vector, Burner" and other associated lame as gently caress things, while also sometimes randomly wearing a flightsuit to work on Fridays despite his only flight time being the fam flight he poo poo his pants or puked his guts up during.
Also he's going to cheat on you. Oh man is he going to cheat on you. And there is a not too bad chance that it won't be with some good looking gal, but rather some dumb bitch enlisted intel girl that almost got a degree in psychology from her podunk state school before she decided she hated the taste of gargling frat sperm and dropped out and joined up to get a chance at being the hottest little twat in a windowless SCIF in Japan.
But don't worry about that breaking your heart, he'll never tell you. You'll be too busy caring for the 3-4 kids he demands you squeeze out in repayment to the base model BMW 3 series he's going to buy you when he gets to his second assignment at Tinker AFB.
When he's not deep dicking some borderline inbred dipshit Airman who's a civilian 5 and intel 12, he'll be lording over you how his job and career come first, and pray he doesn't make more money than you because that'll come up everytime you sigh audibly at the dinner table where you two will passive aggressively try to grind down each others will to live and breathe.
By this point as a captain he's going to be TDY 1-2 months a year, where he's getting half assed hand jobs from third tier strippers on excursions with the least socially inept enlisted guys in his flight-- this is probably the point where his raging alcoholism will be so clear and obvious to you that you two will start fighting every saturday before kick off when his colleges football team inevitably will take a beating. This fight won't stop until his next TDY when the sweet release of his toothless stripper infidelities and lack of home presence gives you time to bust out your big giant purple *BZZZZZ* friend whenever those walking talking pants making GBS threads machines you call children fall asleep long enough to let you deaden the nerves in your clitoris.
Soon after he'll take his third assignment, the one right before he pins on Major, and suddenly he'll be pressuring you into becoming a fundamentalist christian, and he'll delete all of his whores off of his facebook account and spend his home time posting image macros about 2nd amendment rights, and how jesus spoke english in the bible so these loving mexicans should too. At this point you two will be consigned to bi-annual loving, and only when you've drank enough cheap boxed wind to be able to stand the idea of him pounding away on you missionary style but still refusing to look you in the eyes.
This will also be the point when your oldest childs ADHD and pyromania are diagnosed, and one of your parents die. There is around a 85% chance one of you is going to be eating zoloft and klonopin out of loving pez dispensers, and waking up angry that the sweet release of death hasn't taken one of you out of this loveless hosed up marriage.
Somewhere in here the idea of swinging is going to come up casually as an almost joke when you are both in the blissful release of a nice drunken buzz, and one of you will actually be very open and interested in the idea. The other is going to wind up being an unhappy accomplice wondering why your partner wants to gently caress almost chubby guys with spray on tans, or watch the sacred hole through which your children came into this world be filled with all manner of different ethnicities of cock.
I'm late to bring this up, but sooner rather than later you're also going to screen positive for HPV, and your intel officer husband is going to take every bit of research skills he has from his job to convince you that you got it from donating blood or sitting on a toilet seat.
You didn't get it from the Red Cross or a trip to the shitter.
As it stands now though, you can walk the gently caress away and enjoy a life that I'm pretty sure would be better than the above. And you'll never have to see the inside of an officers wives meeting which is a lovecraftian hell that makes my description of your future seem like Charlie's trip through the chocolate factory.
I read the whole thing - this was great.
I'm in the USAF
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Nov 23, 2018 17:09
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- Dreddout
- Oct 1, 2015
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You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.
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I read the whole thing - this was great.
I'm in the USAF
Congrats on your happy marriage
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Nov 23, 2018 18:10
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- Dreddout
- Oct 1, 2015
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You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.
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https://mobile.twitter.com/MaoistRebelNews/status/1011921452847820805
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Nov 23, 2018 21:21
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- MikeCrotch
- Nov 5, 2011
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I AM UNJUSTIFIABLY PROUD OF MY SPAGHETTI BOLOGNESE RECIPE
YES, IT IS AN INCREDIBLY SIMPLE DISH
NO, IT IS NOT NORMAL TO USE A PEPPERAMI INSTEAD OF MINCED MEAT
YES, THERE IS TOO MUCH SALT IN MY RECIPE
NO, I WON'T STOP SHARING IT
more like BOLLOCKnese
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Hillary Clinton just liked my post on instagram where I complained about how poo poo she was for this take
Hillary Clinton: Europe must curb immigration to stop right wing populists
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Nov 23, 2018 21:50
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- 01011001
- Dec 26, 2012
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Go ask the career development folks at the MPF. Also pimp the TMO folks and ask them.
The final answer comes from one of those two sources. And in the end you have a 50/50 chance of being told the wrong thing anyway.
But you asked for thoughts, and after smoking a bowl and contemplating things, I had a thought I'd like to share with you.
Have you considered not marrying your fiancee?
I can count on one finger the number of guys that were USAF intel officers that I wouldn't line up outside the gas chambers if the fourth reich became a thing.
A few years from now, when you can't even stand to look at him without feeling a sense of extreme hatred and disappointment simultaneous to realizing that at 28 years old you spend 50% of your day thinking about becoming a divorcee, remember this advice: Run the gently caress away now.
Seriously, there is a 100% chance your fiancee is a tool and a loving nitwit. There is a 100% chance that he will be peer pressured into becoming a distilled version of fighter pilot gay bro'ness not by dudes that fly fighter jets, but other sperged out intel retard officers. He's going to start saying things like "Check, Rodge, Vector, Burner" and other associated lame as gently caress things, while also sometimes randomly wearing a flightsuit to work on Fridays despite his only flight time being the fam flight he poo poo his pants or puked his guts up during.
Also he's going to cheat on you. Oh man is he going to cheat on you. And there is a not too bad chance that it won't be with some good looking gal, but rather some dumb bitch enlisted intel girl that almost got a degree in psychology from her podunk state school before she decided she hated the taste of gargling frat sperm and dropped out and joined up to get a chance at being the hottest little twat in a windowless SCIF in Japan.
But don't worry about that breaking your heart, he'll never tell you. You'll be too busy caring for the 3-4 kids he demands you squeeze out in repayment to the base model BMW 3 series he's going to buy you when he gets to his second assignment at Tinker AFB.
When he's not deep dicking some borderline inbred dipshit Airman who's a civilian 5 and intel 12, he'll be lording over you how his job and career come first, and pray he doesn't make more money than you because that'll come up everytime you sigh audibly at the dinner table where you two will passive aggressively try to grind down each others will to live and breathe.
By this point as a captain he's going to be TDY 1-2 months a year, where he's getting half assed hand jobs from third tier strippers on excursions with the least socially inept enlisted guys in his flight-- this is probably the point where his raging alcoholism will be so clear and obvious to you that you two will start fighting every saturday before kick off when his colleges football team inevitably will take a beating. This fight won't stop until his next TDY when the sweet release of his toothless stripper infidelities and lack of home presence gives you time to bust out your big giant purple *BZZZZZ* friend whenever those walking talking pants making GBS threads machines you call children fall asleep long enough to let you deaden the nerves in your clitoris.
Soon after he'll take his third assignment, the one right before he pins on Major, and suddenly he'll be pressuring you into becoming a fundamentalist christian, and he'll delete all of his whores off of his facebook account and spend his home time posting image macros about 2nd amendment rights, and how jesus spoke english in the bible so these loving mexicans should too. At this point you two will be consigned to bi-annual loving, and only when you've drank enough cheap boxed wind to be able to stand the idea of him pounding away on you missionary style but still refusing to look you in the eyes.
This will also be the point when your oldest childs ADHD and pyromania are diagnosed, and one of your parents die. There is around a 85% chance one of you is going to be eating zoloft and klonopin out of loving pez dispensers, and waking up angry that the sweet release of death hasn't taken one of you out of this loveless hosed up marriage.
Somewhere in here the idea of swinging is going to come up casually as an almost joke when you are both in the blissful release of a nice drunken buzz, and one of you will actually be very open and interested in the idea. The other is going to wind up being an unhappy accomplice wondering why your partner wants to gently caress almost chubby guys with spray on tans, or watch the sacred hole through which your children came into this world be filled with all manner of different ethnicities of cock.
I'm late to bring this up, but sooner rather than later you're also going to screen positive for HPV, and your intel officer husband is going to take every bit of research skills he has from his job to convince you that you got it from donating blood or sitting on a toilet seat.
You didn't get it from the Red Cross or a trip to the shitter.
As it stands now though, you can walk the gently caress away and enjoy a life that I'm pretty sure would be better than the above. And you'll never have to see the inside of an officers wives meeting which is a lovecraftian hell that makes my description of your future seem like Charlie's trip through the chocolate factory.
lol
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Nov 24, 2018 00:01
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- sleep with the vicious
- Apr 2, 2010
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that time now-canadian prime minister justin trudeau fought now-convicted sex offender senator patrick brazeau in a legit boxing match on sun news network (canada fox news lite) and won convincingly
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Nov 24, 2018 01:47
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- Flavius Aetass
- Mar 30, 2011
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mother by danzig is about tipper and al gore
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Nov 24, 2018 01:48
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- im on the net me boys
- Feb 19, 2017
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Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhjjhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhjhhhhhhjhhhhhhhhhjjjhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh cannabis
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that time now-canadian prime minister justin trudeau fought now-convicted sex offender senator patrick brazeau in a legit boxing match on sun news network (canada fox news lite) and won convincingly
What the gently caress
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Nov 24, 2018 05:19
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- MikeCrotch
- Nov 5, 2011
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I AM UNJUSTIFIABLY PROUD OF MY SPAGHETTI BOLOGNESE RECIPE
YES, IT IS AN INCREDIBLY SIMPLE DISH
NO, IT IS NOT NORMAL TO USE A PEPPERAMI INSTEAD OF MINCED MEAT
YES, THERE IS TOO MUCH SALT IN MY RECIPE
NO, I WON'T STOP SHARING IT
more like BOLLOCKnese
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Justin Trudeau is Fidel Castro's illegitimate son
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Nov 24, 2018 10:34
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- old.flv
- Jan 28, 2017
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A good lad who likes his Anna's.
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John Edwards
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Nov 24, 2018 22:29
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- Filthy Hans
- Jun 27, 2008
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by Fluffdaddy(and can't post for 10 years!)
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Baghdad Bob
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Nov 25, 2018 04:42
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- exmarx
- Feb 18, 2012
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The experience over the years
of nothing getting better
only worse.
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https://twitter.com/HillaryClinton/status/791263939015376902
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Nov 25, 2018 11:12
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- paul_soccer10
- Mar 28, 2016
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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lol
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Nov 25, 2018 14:45
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- old.flv
- Jan 28, 2017
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A good lad who likes his Anna's.
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She tempted the wrath from high atop the thing.
Remember when the only actual President Clinton spooged on an intern in the oval office? The literal actual elected president was boning down on his staff in conditions of questionable consent in the living memory of probably a bunch of this thread, lol what a stupid species we are in general
He stuck a cigar up her pussy - Bubba always got what he wanted.
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Nov 25, 2018 18:14
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- old.flv
- Jan 28, 2017
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A good lad who likes his Anna's.
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The best bit is that Clinton loving an intern led to Gore not winning the election (because he ran away from him in the general election which didn't help his already boring paste persona in an election decided by a few hundred votes) which led to Bush getting elected which led to 9/11 which lead to Iraq and the Great Recession which ultimately all culminated into TRUMP! (Who could write off being a rapist sex pest because of what old Slick Willy did)
Our current hellworld is mostly because Bill couldn't keep his dick in his pants
you can also trace it to a recent sex-pest in Anthony Weiner lmao
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Nov 26, 2018 02:08
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- Absurd Alhazred
- Mar 27, 2010
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by Athanatos
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you can also trace it to a recent sex-pest in Anthony Weiner lmao
Hillary Clinton just can't avoid surrounding herself with sexpests.
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Nov 26, 2018 02:11
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- MikeCrotch
- Nov 5, 2011
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I AM UNJUSTIFIABLY PROUD OF MY SPAGHETTI BOLOGNESE RECIPE
YES, IT IS AN INCREDIBLY SIMPLE DISH
NO, IT IS NOT NORMAL TO USE A PEPPERAMI INSTEAD OF MINCED MEAT
YES, THERE IS TOO MUCH SALT IN MY RECIPE
NO, I WON'T STOP SHARING IT
more like BOLLOCKnese
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Got a request - anyone got the video where Jim Cramer from Mad Money talks about how he used to be a Spartacist in college and how people were going to start hanging bankers to his increasingly nervous co-host
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Nov 26, 2018 13:23
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- Cactus Jack
- Nov 16, 2005
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If you even try to throw to my side of the field in a dream, you better wake up and apologize.
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Got a request - anyone got the video where Jim Cramer from Mad Money talks about how he used to be a Spartacist in college and how people were going to start hanging bankers to his increasingly nervous co-host
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YJe86RQq8lQ
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Nov 26, 2018 13:34
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- GalacticAcid
- Apr 8, 2013
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NEW YORK VALUES
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Liz Boo!nig
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Nov 26, 2018 21:31
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- paul_soccer10
- Mar 28, 2016
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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lmao
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Nov 26, 2018 22:32
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- ikanreed
- Sep 25, 2009
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I honestly I have no idea who cannibal[SIC] is and I do not know why I should know.
syq dude, just syq!
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Lol remember that time Trump won.
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Nov 26, 2018 22:42
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- ikanreed
- Sep 25, 2009
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I honestly I have no idea who cannibal[SIC] is and I do not know why I should know.
syq dude, just syq!
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Really the funniest part was Hillary losing
Only because she lost twice.
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Nov 26, 2018 22:59
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- quite stretched out
- Feb 17, 2011
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the chillest
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Nov 26, 2018 23:57
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- The Crotch
- Oct 16, 2012
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by Nyc_Tattoo
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Paul Martin spent over a decade angling for the job of Prime Minister of Canada, spending most of that time as the Jean Chretien's austerity-loving finance minister. He eventually succeeded in 2003, but was almost immediately kneecapped in the election of 2004 when his party was reduced to a minority government. He retired from politics in 2006 after losing what most people thought was a gimme election, resulting in a decade of Conservative Party rule in the country.
Trump 2020.
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Nov 27, 2018 05:01
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 24, 2024 07:41
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- Ayatollah Hermione
- Apr 3, 2007
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by Cyrano4747
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Only because she lost twice.
the loss to trump was funnier bc it proved that 08 wasn't just because obama was great and she actually sucked all along
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Nov 27, 2018 05:08
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