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paranoid randroid
Mar 4, 2007
max scrote

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brugroffil
Nov 30, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 11 hours!

https://twitter.com/daveweigel/status/1082704541919911939

pathetic little tramp
Dec 12, 2005

by Hillary Clinton's assassins
Fallen Rib
https://twitter.com/csymrl/status/1082704020622389248

lol go the gently caress away

Mons Hubris
Aug 29, 2004

fanci flup :)



whoopi bout to get pooped on

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

Nichael posted:

it's not like we have a pressing crisis on our hands that will literally cause the species to go extinct if we don't deal with it in the next ten years
yeah, it's called a bunch of inexperienced socialist children trying to tell the grown-ups what to do

ASenileAnimal
Dec 21, 2017

DO IT TO IT posted:

These posts suddenly reminded me of the thing that broke me away from religion as a kid: when my hardcore lutheran mom started warning me not to forget that my nice jewish friend was going to hell.

yikes. hearing stuff like this makes me really appreciate my parents for thinking church was a bunch of boring bullshit and letting me spend sunday playing :krad: snes instead

paranoid randroid
Mar 4, 2007
welp thats my joke for the year folks, ill be flying on autopilot from here out

Drunkboxer
Jun 30, 2007

Intel&Sebastian posted:

Yeah more or less the same.

I also distinctly remember the time in Evangelical church when the pastor broke out the super classic "actually when Jesus said it's easier for a camel to fit through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to go to heaven he was referencing a specific gate to the city where camels have to kneel to get in, so don't worry congregation full of rich white people, you're all good" and thinking "holy smokes this is all total bullshit lmao"

I also remember one time falling asleep during a sermon and being startled awake by the pastors loud declaration to the teens in the audience that "MUTUAL MASTURBATION IS. SEX."

Well, it kinda is. Just a lovely version of it.

Durf
Aug 16, 2017




Epic High Five posted:

bitch I'm bringin the tonsure back

ready to show those Roman Catholics what for

Rah!
Feb 21, 2006


i just remembered this time when i was 10 and i was riding a new rollercoaster at six flags and had to sit next to this large bodied rocker dude in a leather vest who looked kinda like steven segal and he kept giggling thru the whole ride and saying "THIS IS BAD, MANNNNNN YEAHHHH THIS IS BAD" and thats when i learned that even people outside of movies say "bad" to mean cool i hope that man didnt vote for trum but i dont why id expect that from steven segals clone

UFOTacoMan
Sep 22, 2005

Thanks easter bunny!
bok bok!
wanna toot that boot

Cao Ni Ma
May 25, 2010




Lol AOC triggering rich leftist like corbyn

brugroffil
Nov 30, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 11 hours!

Anime Schoolgirl posted:

the calvinists were also pretty huge serial rapists

uh, were?

Quotey
Aug 16, 2006

We went out for lunch and then we stopped for some bubble tea.
Word Mark TRUMP TOUCH

Zerg Mans
Oct 19, 2006

fun fact, ever water bear of the same species has the exact same amount of cells. They're preprogrammed to only divide a specific amount of times

Inspector Hound
Jul 14, 2003


Schnorkles
Apr 30, 2015

It's a little bit juvenile, but it's simple and it's timeless.

We let it be known that Schnorkles, for a snack, eats tiny pieces of shit.

You're picturing it and you're talking about it. That's a win in my book.
mormon horndogs participate in 'marinating' which is exactly what it sounds like and extremely lmao

Schmeichy
Apr 22, 2007

2spooky4u


Smellrose

Pomp posted:

When my brother shot himself my grandmother told my youngest brother that he was going to hell

I'm mad for you, I'm sorry

Rah!
Feb 21, 2006


Ragequit
Jun 1, 2006


Lipstick Apathy

Skynet except the robots keep stabbing each other in the back

juche avocado
Dec 23, 2009





Feldegast42 posted:

One of the big things that broke me off from an evangelical view of religion was thinking about some uncontacted island tribe in the middle of the pacific and how no matter how decent or morally upright of a life you led you were still going to hell at the end of it just because you never got the word of Jesus

I can't comprehend a God that would drat people for hell for absolutely no fault in their own, which also brings me against pre-destination, another evangelical favorite which states that you are already destined to heaven or hell and there is no way you can change which way you are going

Man gently caress white evangelicals and fundementalists

to the extent that all religiosity questions are impossible to be right/wrong:

this poo poo, the "you're only saved if you've heard and accepted the Word" stuff, is a perversion that really speaks to, imo, the psychology of those who hold the opinion. it's very victim-blamey. it's the fault of the people who haven't been contacted? okay. bullshit

that rests on the assumption that the original point of the command to "Go Out And Tell The Good News!" was about adding more sheep to the flock. well what if it wasn't? what if the act of preaching the gospel is itself both worshipful and soul-savey-----but not saving of the listeners' soul(s), but rather yours?

what if the responsibility is yours, having heard the good news, to share it? that the onus is on you; that it's your responsibility, now that you know. that you cannot be saved unless you share with others what you now know, irrespective of whether they join your big gay flock or not

:sigh:

*fun fact about this reading and how all things can be perverted: this is more or less the justification for why those assholes who scream about how jesus is lord and god loves IEDs etc., etc., on busy street corners are, in fact, keeping with god's word

in summation and conclusion,
theology is a land of contrasts

Anime Schoolgirl
Nov 28, 2002

you're right, they still technically exist masquerading as other sects

univbee
Jun 3, 2004





Also good advice to that guy who posted on /r/relationships about his wife wanting to eat his poo poo.

Rah!
Feb 21, 2006


whoopi goldberg more like

whoopiss gargleblast

brugroffil
Nov 30, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 11 hours!
https://twitter.com/ZoeTillman/status/1082706040272154624

sincx
Jul 13, 2012

furiously masturbating to anime titties

Rich person afraid of 70% tax rates, news at 11.

Floor is lava
May 14, 2007

Fallen Rib

what whoopi is saying is that "This sister act-in like a fool. 3"

juche avocado
Dec 23, 2009





hmmm i wonder if the hill has done some contorting to make that more enraging

HugeGrossBurrito
Mar 20, 2018

univbee posted:

Also good advice to that guy who posted on /r/relationships about his wife wanting to eat his poo poo.

i knew there was a joke that made sense in there somewhere

pathetic little tramp
Dec 12, 2005

by Hillary Clinton's assassins
Fallen Rib
https://twitter.com/nytimes/status/1082577684314632192

Silicon Valley figures out taxes

Nichael
Mar 30, 2011


I'd love to see how how crazy the media would go if you got an actual radical leftist elected. I want someone to start popularizing the idea of wealth caps, and abolishing the Senate.

UFOTacoMan
Sep 22, 2005

Thanks easter bunny!
bok bok!

Schnorkles posted:

mormon horndogs participate in 'marinating' which is exactly what it sounds like and extremely lmao

wanna soak some caulk

Epic High Five
Jun 5, 2004




This is the guy who seems to have a decent amount of progressive ideas but nobody will ever trust him because he's a billionaire hedge fund manager right

Not a Children
Oct 9, 2012

Don't need a holster if you never stop shooting.

Schnorkles posted:

mormon horndogs participate in 'marinating' which is exactly what it sounds like and extremely lmao

no amount of sex ed would save brains this broken

pathetic little tramp
Dec 12, 2005

by Hillary Clinton's assassins
Fallen Rib
https://twitter.com/kaitlancollins/status/1082706491591745536

Do it you fat fat bitch

juche avocado
Dec 23, 2009





having read the full piece and the full quote

yep

Schnorkles
Apr 30, 2015

It's a little bit juvenile, but it's simple and it's timeless.

We let it be known that Schnorkles, for a snack, eats tiny pieces of shit.

You're picturing it and you're talking about it. That's a win in my book.
https://twitter.com/rachaelmbade/status/1082700242615705600

:thunk: I can't loving believe this is happen -

oh wait i can extremely believe that this, the dumbest possible option, is happening.

Zerg Mans
Oct 19, 2006


nothing will ever top their invention of the bus

Scrub-Niggurath
Nov 27, 2007


lol

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Mariana Horchata
Jun 30, 2008

College Slice
max bootlicker can take a poo poo in his hat

lol if u subscribe to nyt/wapo

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