Star Trek: *hits blunt* The higher, the fewerrrrrr

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > TV IV > Star Trek: *hits blunt* The higher, the fewerrrrrr

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Blast Fantasto: Sep 18, 2007; USAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Beyond was good and the only Kelvin movie that felt like Star Trek. Made me wish Pegg had co-written the other two.

# ? Jan 16, 2019 20:58

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# ? May 15, 2024 05:47

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

You know, now that I think about it a temporal cold war makes total sense. If time travel's easy, and anyone can do it, the only way everything survives is if nobody uses it, but Starfleet's as bad as the Romulans when it comes to pushing that red button and meddling.

Damit, Enterprise, you really Voyagered that plot.

# ? Jan 16, 2019 21:14

bull3964: Nov 18, 2000; DO YOU HEAR THAT? THAT'S THE SOUND OF ME PATTING MYSELF ON THE BACK.

Blast Fantasto posted:

Beyond was good and the only Kelvin movie that felt like Star Trek. Made me wish Pegg had co-written the other two.

Shame about that last act though.

Since generations, every single star trek movie ended with fisticuffs, mostly in precarious surroundings. It sucks.

# ? Jan 16, 2019 21:31

qirex: Feb 15, 2001

Star Trek used to be the franchise where they used gimmicky problem solving but now it's just an excuse for punching. The best was Kirk literally kicking the warp core back into alignment in Into Darkness.

# ? Jan 16, 2019 22:06

Name Change: Oct 9, 2005

spincube posted:

...and that's how WW2 ended up being fought entirely by people trying to kill Hitler, and people trying to stop people trying to kill Hitler.

# ? Jan 16, 2019 22:17

bull3964: Nov 18, 2000; DO YOU HEAR THAT? THAT'S THE SOUND OF ME PATTING MYSELF ON THE BACK.

Like, I'm not even saying the movie can't end with an action sequence. It's just that they've all been a one on one slugfest up on some catwalk/high place, with some arbitrary timer in the background.

The fight ending to beyond didn't even add anything to the movie, it felt completely tacked on.

Reminder that Kirk and Kahn were never even in the same room as each other in ST:II and only communicated directly with each other in two scenes.

Aside from a one way taunt, to get them into the nebula, the last time Kirk and Kahn actually talk is when there's still 50 minutes of movie left.

# ? Jan 16, 2019 22:19

qirex: Feb 15, 2001

It is kind of funny that they come up with these insane excuses for physical violence to be the answer. The other modern convention of the new movies/shows is that you need a constant existential threat. The lives of millions or billions of people must be at stake to add tension but I think people are getting over it.

Maybe we'll even be back to episodic instead of serial tv shows at some point.

# ? Jan 16, 2019 22:26

Sash!: Mar 16, 2001

I don't know if it is modern, really. Which Star Trek movie isn't about stopping some alien force from killing everyone, stopping someone from getting control of a superweapon to kill everyone, or some combination thereof?

# ? Jan 16, 2019 22:37

Cat Hatter: Oct 24, 2006; Hatters gonna hat.

qirex posted:

...
The other modern convention of the new movies/shows is that you need a constant existential threat. The lives of millions or billions of people must be at stake to add tension but I think people are getting over it.
...

Going down the list there's 1, 4, 7, 8, 10, JJTrek, and Beyond. Probably could add 3, 6, and Into Darkness if you squint. An argument could be made for 5 but I'd disagree.

# ? Jan 16, 2019 22:50

bull3964: Nov 18, 2000; DO YOU HEAR THAT? THAT'S THE SOUND OF ME PATTING MYSELF ON THE BACK.

Stakes in II weren't that high in the grand scheme of things. Khan wanted to kill Kirk. Otherwise, he would have taken Genesis and made his own world to rule.

He wasn't going to hold the federation hostage or anything like that. It was really only the end goal of Space Seed with a bit of revenge tossed in.

Similarly, stakes in III weren't that high. Kruge could have never gotten what he wanted out of anyone present. You can't just verbally give the secret of Genesis. Once the Enterprise went boom, there was no galactic threat.

IV had the most start trek ending possible, the alien was essentially talked away (by the whales.). The novelization gives more context, but it was never malevolent. It literally thought there was no intelligent life left on the planet and was sanitizing it to start over. Billions were at risk, just not out of the motivation of a big bad.

V maybe possibly could have been super high stakes if the alien got off the planet, but Kirk was having none of that from the start, so the stakes never materialised.

VI had big stakes though. However it's wasn't "everyone is going to die" it was just prevention of the Federation and Klingons signing peace accords.

It honestly wasn't even about all out war. Both sides conspired with each other. They just wanted to maintain the military industrial complex to justify their existence, not actually genocide.

bull3964 fucked around with this message at 23:01 on Jan 16, 2019

# ? Jan 16, 2019 22:59

Name Change: Oct 9, 2005

bull3964 posted:

Stakes in II weren't that high in the grand scheme of things. Khan wanted to kill Kirk. Otherwise, he would have taken Genesis and made his own world to rule.

Well, because we know Khan is an unhinged megalomaniac barbarian, that would be Very Bad

# ? Jan 16, 2019 23:23

qirex: Feb 15, 2001

My point is what I like about Star Trek is the unknown, "boldly going" and all that and I'm hoping at some point the franchise returns to that instead of protecting the federation against a threat [that they probably created] for the 999th time. The fact that they're making a Section 31 series is the opposite of that.

# ? Jan 16, 2019 23:29

bull3964: Nov 18, 2000; DO YOU HEAR THAT? THAT'S THE SOUND OF ME PATTING MYSELF ON THE BACK.

Sodomy Hussein posted:

Well, because we know Khan is an unhinged megalomaniac barbarian, that would be Very Bad

It's unlikely he would have become uncontained in his lifetime.

Khan wouldn't have even been a threat in ST:II if there would have been another ship around.

# ? Jan 16, 2019 23:39

Senor Tron: May 26, 2006

bull3964 posted:

IV had the most start trek ending possible, the alien was essentially talked away (by the whales.). The novelization gives more context, but it was never malevolent. It literally thought there was no intelligent life left on the planet and was sanitizing it to start over. Billions were at risk, just not out of the motivation of a big bad.

I want to see some more of this really mysterious totally alien stuff in Trek. I think the closest we have got in the past 30 years is the very first appearances of the Borg.

# ? Jan 17, 2019 00:13

qirex: Feb 15, 2001

Senor Tron posted:

I want to see some more of this really mysterious totally alien stuff in Trek. I think the closest we have got in the past 30 years is the very first appearances of the Borg.

I think that's what Voyager was supposed to be but they kept going back to the well on the Borg and other random Alpha quadrant ships they encountered. The only new things I remember from it was the reskinned Klingons who became literal nazis and the biomemetic fake fungus crew.

# ? Jan 17, 2019 00:19

FlamingLiberal: Jan 18, 2009; Would you like to play a game?

bull3964 posted:

Stakes in II weren't that high in the grand scheme of things. Khan wanted to kill Kirk. Otherwise, he would have taken Genesis and made his own world to rule.

He wasn't going to hold the federation hostage or anything like that. It was really only the end goal of Space Seed with a bit of revenge tossed in.

Similarly, stakes in III weren't that high. Kruge could have never gotten what he wanted out of anyone present. You can't just verbally give the secret of Genesis. Once the Enterprise went boom, there was no galactic threat.

IV had the most start trek ending possible, the alien was essentially talked away (by the whales.). The novelization gives more context, but it was never malevolent. It literally thought there was no intelligent life left on the planet and was sanitizing it to start over. Billions were at risk, just not out of the motivation of a big bad.

V maybe possibly could have been super high stakes if the alien got off the planet, but Kirk was having none of that from the start, so the stakes never materialised.

VI had big stakes though. However it's wasn't "everyone is going to die" it was just prevention of the Federation and Klingons signing peace accords.

It honestly wasn't even about all out war. Both sides conspired with each other. They just wanted to maintain the military industrial complex to justify their existence, not actually genocide.

I feel like in ST6 if the conspirators had succeeded in assassinating the Klingon Chancellor and the UFP President, that likely would have triggered a war

# ? Jan 17, 2019 00:22

The Bloop: Jul 5, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

qirex posted:

I think that's what Voyager was supposed to be but they kept going back to the well on the Borg and other random Alpha quadrant ships they encountered. The only new things I remember from it was the reskinned Klingons who became literal nazis and the biomemetic fake fungus crew.

I mean they had 8472 but they used that as an excuse to have Voyager at goddamn Starfleet Academy

# ? Jan 17, 2019 01:38

Mister Kingdom: Dec 14, 2005; And the tears that fall
On the city wall
Will fade away
With the rays of morning light

The Bloop posted:

I mean they had 8472 but they used that as an excuse to have Voyager at goddamn Starfleet Academy

Did somebody say Starfleet Academy?

It lasted a whole 19 issues.

# ? Jan 17, 2019 02:31

Blade_of_tyshalle: Jul 12, 2009; If you think that, along the way, you're not going to fail... you're blind.

There's no one I've ever met, no matter how successful they are, who hasn't said they had their failures along the way.

What, the Andorian doesn't get a phaser?

# ? Jan 17, 2019 02:39

Brawnfire: Jul 13, 2004; 🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Blade_of_tyshalle posted:

What, the Andorian doesn't get a phaser?

She knows vershaan

# ? Jan 17, 2019 02:41

Nullsmack: Dec 7, 2001; Digital apocalypse

Blade_of_tyshalle posted:

What, the Andorian doesn't get a phaser?

Apparently she has claws (just going by the cover)

# ? Jan 17, 2019 02:42

Phylodox: Mar 30, 2006; College Slice

Jesus Christ, "Real Life".

B'ELANNA: Computer, add some randomized variables to the Doctor's family.

COMPUTER:

# ? Jan 17, 2019 03:25

skasion: Feb 13, 2012; Why don't you perform zazen, facing a wall?

Mister Kingdom posted:

Did somebody say Starfleet Academy?

It lasted a whole 19 issues.

This is the one where they team up with wheelchair Pike to fight the Jemhadar, right?

# ? Jan 17, 2019 03:28

Chickenwalker: Apr 21, 2011; by FactsAreUseless

Did the Enterprise-E itself (or a Sovereign-class model) ever show up on any of the shows? I know DS9 and Voyager were still airing by the time First Contact came out, and crew members guest starred on each of those shows.

# ? Jan 17, 2019 03:52

ashpanash: Apr 9, 2008; I can see when you are lying.

Nope, it was reserved for the movies, because some idiot executives thought that would be important, I guess.

# ? Jan 17, 2019 03:54

FlamingLiberal: Jan 18, 2009; Would you like to play a game?

The Sovereign is the only one that never shows up outside of the movies. All of the other ships they introduced in First Contact appeared later on DS9 or Voyager even if it was just a background shot

# ? Jan 17, 2019 04:04

MikeJF: Dec 20, 2003

FlamingLiberal posted:

The Sovereign is the only one that never shows up outside of the movies. All of the other ships they introduced in First Contact appeared later on DS9 or Voyager even if it was just a background shot

The Norway class from First Contact never showed up again, for technical reasons. Either the model was lost or it was too much effort to fix it up for TV.

# ? Jan 17, 2019 04:07

ashpanash: Apr 9, 2008; I can see when you are lying.

yeah but they kept the sovereign for movies only because I guess they figured that people wouldn't have been as excited about nemesis if they had seen other similarly shaped objects pew pewing on their tv screens

# ? Jan 17, 2019 04:07

Astroman: Apr 8, 2001

Mister Kingdom posted:

Did somebody say Starfleet Academy?

It lasted a whole 19 issues.

Three-Dimensional Twister, the Ultimate Evolution of Children's Games

# ? Jan 17, 2019 04:25

Delsaber: Oct 1, 2013; This may or may not be correct.

Mister Kingdom posted:

Did somebody say Starfleet Academy?

It lasted a whole 19 issues.

RED SQUAD RED SQUAD RED SQUAD RED SQUAD

# ? Jan 17, 2019 04:37

The Bloop: Jul 5, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

Delsaber posted:

DEAD SQUAD DEAD SQUAD DEAD SQUAD DEAD SQUAD

# ? Jan 17, 2019 04:46

Cat Hatter: Oct 24, 2006; Hatters gonna hat.

ashpanash posted:

yeah but they kept the sovereign for movies only because I guess they figured that people wouldn't have been as excited about nemesis if they had seen other similarly shaped objects pew pewing on their tv screens

Maybe they were afraid of getting people riled up at destroying "the Enterprise" again after what happened to the Odyssey. Not that it stopped them from using Galaxies throughout the war.

# ? Jan 17, 2019 05:23

Ghost Leviathan: Mar 2, 2017; Exploration is ill-advised.

Senor Tron posted:

I want to see some more of this really mysterious totally alien stuff in Trek. I think the closest we have got in the past 30 years is the very first appearances of the Borg.

Wasn't there at least an Enterprise episode where some weird aliens board the Enterprise, do unknown stuff to people and leave without the crew ever learning what the gently caress?

# ? Jan 17, 2019 05:44

Cythereal: Nov 8, 2009; I love the potoo,
and the potoo loves you.

Ghost Leviathan posted:

Wasn't there at least an Enterprise episode where some weird aliens board the Enterprise, do unknown stuff to people and leave without the crew ever learning what the gently caress?

Silent Enemy. Great a-plot, godawful b-plot.

If you play Star Trek Online, these are the aliens that game adapted as the Elachi.

# ? Jan 17, 2019 05:49

Tighclops: Jan 23, 2008; Unable to deal with it; Grimey Drawer

I miss how in TNG season 1 whenever some poo poo was about to go down geordi and data would exchange knowing glances and sometimes a nod as if to acknowledge that it's fuckin go time

# ? Jan 17, 2019 05:51

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

Ghost Leviathan posted:

Wasn't there at least an Enterprise episode where some weird aliens board the Enterprise, do unknown stuff to people and leave without the crew ever learning what the gently caress?

That was a good one. Completely inscrutable aliens would've been boring if they happened all the time but I did appreciate it happening occasionally.

# ? Jan 17, 2019 05:55

Microplastics: Jul 6, 2007; It's what's for dinner.

Cythereal posted:

Silent Enemy. Great a-plot, godawful b-plot.

Lol

quote:

Enterprise is attacked by an unknown alien starship, as Archer orders the crew to install experimental "phase cannons". Meanwhile, Sato is ordered to find out what Reed's favorite food is for a birthday dinner.

HAVEN'T YOU GOT BETTER THINGS TO BE DOING

# ? Jan 17, 2019 08:12

Zurui: Apr 20, 2005; Even now...

That is some TNGS8 bullshit.

# ? Jan 17, 2019 08:25

Delsaber: Oct 1, 2013; This may or may not be correct.

That episode ends with them drinking beers and eating a pineapple cake. Good on 22nd century food science for making that pairing work.

# ? Jan 17, 2019 08:35

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# ? May 15, 2024 05:47

MikeJF: Dec 20, 2003

If I recall they find out in the end by just getting Phlox to casually violate Reed's medical privacy rights and looking at his medical records to note that he takes meds to suppress a pineapple allergy.

# ? Jan 17, 2019 09:08

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > TV IV > Star Trek: *hits blunt* The higher, the fewerrrrrr

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