/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

Antivehicular: Dec 30, 2011; I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

Renegret posted:

Vegetables are garbage, because it's not meat, which is what a real man eats.

Years and years ago, some goon had an "ask me about being a picky eater" thread where he claimed that he didn't even parse fruits/vegetables as food. I still think about that guy and wonder if he's dead yet.

# ? Jan 18, 2019 20:08

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# ? Jun 4, 2024 23:21

Bored: Jul 26, 2007; Dude, ix-nay on the oice-vay.

Antivehicular posted:

Years and years ago, some goon had an "ask me about being a picky eater" thread where he claimed that he didn't even parse fruits/vegetables as food. I still think about that guy and wonder if he's dead yet.

No. He went to prison for assaulting his girlfriend after she told him she was going to be eating fruits and vegetables.

Edit: found the OP I'm talking about. No clue if the update's attached.
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/3m8zue/i_25_f_am_growing_tired_of_my28_m_boyfriend_of_45/

There is no rape in the first part of the story. Just a ridiculous list of stuff he won't eat.

Bored fucked around with this message at 20:30 on Jan 18, 2019

# ? Jan 18, 2019 20:15

Teabag Dome Scandal: Mar 19, 2002

Xenocides posted:

And two things we all love: horses and masturbation. Plus a pro-tier username:

I [24F] live with my boss [52F] and I can hear her loudly masturbating almost every night.
u/tug-a-bug

Phones these days are really good at isolating ambient sound. i bet she could continue her phone calls without anyone hearing her boss.

# ? Jan 18, 2019 20:19

Squatch Ambassador: Nov 12, 2008; What? Never seen a shaved Squatch before?

Bored posted:

No. He went to prison for assaulting his girlfriend after she told him she was going to be eating fruits and vegetables.

Edit: found the OP I'm talking about. No clue if the update's attached.
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/3m8zue/i_25_f_am_growing_tired_of_my28_m_boyfriend_of_45/

There is no rape in the first part of the story. Just a ridiculous list of stuff he won't eat.

I found the update in that user's history:

E: changed quote to link due to description of rape
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/3odmqq/update_i_25_f_am_growing_tired_of_my_28_m/

:dogbutton:

Squatch Ambassador fucked around with this message at 20:07 on Jan 19, 2019

# ? Jan 18, 2019 20:45

JFairfax: Oct 23, 2008; by FactsAreUseless

# ? Jan 18, 2019 21:31

jobson groeth: May 17, 2018; by FactsAreUseless

Hungry Computer posted:

I found the update in that user's history:

That tldr leaves a fair substantial part of the story out.

Don't read the whole thing if you don't want to read about violent rape.

# ? Jan 18, 2019 21:53

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

Me, 32f with my family 50 f, 52m, 65 f, 68m. "The Doctor wound up being Indian and that dissapointed us but he was actually nice and we could even understand him."

quote:

Tldr, my family members use very casual racism/gay slurs, you name it. Statements like that one that I heard today. Exclamations about how they were enjoying XYZ show until all of a sudden they were faced with "a gay." That thing with the gays was the actual conversation at Christmas, I had to get up and walk away out of disgust and discomfort and when I came back it was STILL the topic.

My family sees nothing wrong with casual racism. Like that stsgment my grandmother made about her doctor today. It rolls right out of her mouth like nothing but a fact of the matter. Like, no one wants an Indian doctor, amirite?!

I love a local Indian restaurant and got my parents a gift card. They went and my dad was IN FEAR the entire time because the little old man at the desk wears a turban and the workers are shockingly, all Indian. I've never heard the end of it for sending them to an authentic location where they were faced with a real, live "towel head" and had to sit and cower in fear that they were going to be murdered in the middle of the 4.5 yelp star reviewed restaurant.

How do you deal with this? These are not people who will respond well to any kind of "why was he nice in spite of being an Indian?" Kind of thought. Or, gee a gay person in a movie doesn't bother me.

They will just roll their eyes and shake their heads and say that's the problem with my generation.

These kind of interactions make me so mad. In my personal life I don't stand for that kind of crap but with family I'm forced to sit there and smile and nod and act like it isn't atrocious behavior.

Thankfully my little immediate family will be moving lost distance this summer and my kids won't grow up listening to this garbage. But it makes me not want the relationships at all. I care about my family but I don't like them very much. The intolerance is really just.. a mark of a stupid, unevolved loser and I don't like it.

How do you navigate this, or do you need to just chock it up to, yep they're bigots and always will be?

# ? Jan 18, 2019 21:55

Beachcomber: May 21, 2007; Another day in paradise.; Slippery Tilde

Xenocides posted:

There is a hell of a lot of context so you're gonna have to stick with me here.

And from the comments in case you do not hate dear old dad enough yet:

I love these kind of stories because I can't put myself in the mental place of the parent. It utterly fascinates me.

# ? Jan 18, 2019 21:59

Beachcomber: May 21, 2007; Another day in paradise.; Slippery Tilde

Straight White Shark posted:

Me, 32f with my family 50 f, 52m, 65 f, 68m. "The Doctor wound up being Indian and that dissapointed us but he was actually nice and we could even understand him."

Once someone hits 50 the only one who can help them is themselves. Don't count on them changing.

I do think it's important that me and my doctor understand each other first time, so I have switched my PCP around for that.

# ? Jan 18, 2019 22:05

Smirking_Serpent: Aug 27, 2009

I [23f] stopped being overly accommodating when my boyfriend [21m] wants to reschedule things at the last minute. We haven't seen each other in 2 weeks.

My boyfriend kept cancelling or putting off things last minute because his friends ask him to hang out and he has major FOMO so he'll always say yes.

That was really frustrating for me because I have a much less flexible schedule than him. I work a full time job, he is a student. I do two sports, and he does one. I have hobbies that involve pre-planning such as backpacking and rock climbing, his main hobby is gaming which he can do anytime. I am looking for a new job and I am spending time at networking events and on teaching myself a new programming language, he doesn't spend much time on career development. He got his internships very easily at his dad's company, or through his dad's connections, and didn't need to spend time networking.

So to him, delaying or rescheduling something wouldn't be a big deal, because he doesn't have many solid commitments. For me, it is a big deal because I have a lot on my plate, and moving one thing will force me to shuffle my calendar, effecting several days.

For some time, I did that. Shuffling around my study time, skipping the gym, etc, to accommodate him wanting to put stuff off or reschedule last minute. Let's say we had a lunch date planned, and I wanted to go to a networking event after, and he was late for lunch, I'd let him push it off even if it meant missing my event. But I got sick of that, it was putting a lot of extra stress on me because I was inconveniencing myself.

So, these last few weeks, I've been treating my calendar as set-in-stone. If I have a gym trip or sport practice planned, I go. If I have studying or career development events planned, I do that. If I want to get to bed by midnight to be well rested for work,, I do. I don't shuffle things around or cancel my plans if my boyfriend shows up late or wants to reschedule.

A few examples were on a Saturday, I'd planned to go to the gym in the morning, have a lunch date with my boyfriend at 11:30 am, start studying for interviews at 2 pm, and go see my friends at 6 pm. My boyfriend texted me around lunch time saying he'd be running late, and could we do a late lunch? I said that I had plans at 2 so I'd need to be done with lunch by 2. We ended up not doing lunch because by the time he'd be ready to go, it was too late.

He wanted to come hang out at my apartment on Sunday and I said that I'd be free from 7 pm on, but I wanted to be in bed by midnight. He wanted to come over at 11:45 and I said that was too late, I was getting ready for bed.

One weeknight, we had a dinner date planned, and he got invited out to dinner with his friends. He went, and then said we could go out for dinner after that. He'd be full but he'd have a drink while I ate. But by the time we'd planned to go out, he was still out with his friends. And I didn't care to wait around for him, just to be the only one eating, so I made myself dinner and cancelled the date.

On Friday night, I threw a party starting at 8 pm that my boyfriend was going to come to, and even help me set everything up for. It wrapped up around 1 am, and my friends went home. Through the whole thing my boyfriend had been texting me saying he'd come over soon once his gaming group finished their campaign. Just a little bit longer, just a bit longer, etc. He showed up just as everyone was putting on their shoes and coats, and I told him to go home because I was going to bed. I was drunk and didn't want to sleep with him after he'd flaked on my party. He said that he thought it would be fine to show up at one am because usually my friends and I will party until sunrise. But we haven't done that since college.

He asked yesterday when we could hang out, and I told him my next free night is next Wednesday, and he got mad he'd have to book with me almost week in advance.

So, since I stopped accommodating his lateness and last minute delays and all, we haven't seen each other for 2 weeks except for when he showed up for the last 5 minutes of the party and I sent him home. We had plenty of stuff planned, but each time he tried to change the plan at the Last second, and I just stopped accommodating that.

I don't think I'm too much of a stickler for punctualness or schedules, it's been effortless to make plans with my friends and have them work out. I'm only having this issue with my boyfriend.

I don't know what to do from here.

TLDR - I stopped being so accommodating when my boyfriend was late to stuff, or wanted to reschedule things at the last minute. Ever since I stopped going out of my way and accommodating his flakiness, we haven't hung out in weeks.

# ? Jan 18, 2019 22:10

McSpanky: Jan 16, 2005

Straight White Shark posted:

Me, 32f with my family 50 f, 52m, 65 f, 68m. "The Doctor wound up being Indian and that dissapointed us but he was actually nice and we could even understand him."

quote:

How do you navigate this, or do you need to just chock it up to, yep they're bigots and always will be?

Yeah sorry, they have a terminal case of The Olds. At most you might be able to shame them into silence around you by playing on the "don't gently caress up my kids" angle but they'll definitely get bitter about it behind your back. At those ages they ain't gonna change short of "a towelhead" etc pulling them out of a burning car wreck (and even then the boomers will probably only get as far as "I guess there's a few good ones after all").

# ? Jan 18, 2019 22:14

Heliogabalos: Apr 16, 2017; you can still key in codes for the cheapest of item (for example, celery instead of organic whatever) and no one pays any attention and it saves me a fuckton of money on organic produce

Straight White Shark posted:

Me, 32f with my family 50 f, 52m, 65 f, 68m. "The Doctor wound up being Indian and that dissapointed us but he was actually nice and we could even understand him."

the family is garbage and you estrange yourself from everyone who is racist. Racism is loving vile and the only way to fight it in a family is ostracism or estrangement. I know, I don't speak to most of my racist yet somehow lovingly Christian siblings.

# ? Jan 18, 2019 22:15

cumshitter: Sep 27, 2005; by Fluffdaddy

It sounds like she has a pretty good handle on the situation. Just keep gifting the parents cards to ethnic restaurants because apparently their cheapness is greater than their actual hatred of minorities, so she can continue to torture them with free food until they die.

# ? Jan 18, 2019 22:19

cumshitter: Sep 27, 2005; by Fluffdaddy

"We went to that Italian restaurant you got us a card for and it was FULL of Papists! We thought we were going to die! The food was good though."

# ? Jan 18, 2019 22:20

hyperhazard: Dec 4, 2011; I am the one lascivious
With magic potion niveous

Papa Emeritus III posted:

This sounds exhausting. I feel for you.
I have some intestinal problems and I'll get a painful reaction to some food. I'm missing a gall bladder, too.
My mother has legit gluten issues and follows the modified diet or else she is miserable(pain, etc)and its not hard to find poo poo with wheat flour alternatives. Point is, she tries to be accommodating, my brother -who is just infuriatingly picky for no good reason- isn't and I want to punch all picky eaters who project a victim complex like he does(example: He dislikes onions. If he sees an onion piece, no matter how small, it's the end of the meal. Straight taps out). He even lied to people and said he was allergic to onions. My mom adds onions to poo poo like pot roast and if he can't see or outright taste them, he's fine. The little bitch.

Peanut allergies can be severe though. Careful.

Yeah, no kidding. I still have doubts he has been in any serious relationship. If he has, he wasn't in more than one or two. He's clutching his pearls about how condoms mean sex, which is a thing I did at age 12, then grew up. And, someone noted it earlier, this idiot believes this is proof of an affair somehow. Jeez.

BTW - Ghost avatars are my kind of avatars and I loving love yours. Square Hammer is the poo poo.

Yo, Ghost avatar buddy. :hfive:

I was going to have a Cardinal C twirl from rats, but I couldn't get it down to the size limit. But Papa is classic.

# ? Jan 18, 2019 22:22

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

https://twitter.com/redditships/status/1086314848277987332?s=21

# ? Jan 18, 2019 22:23

hevnz 2 murgatroyd: Apr 13, 2018; by Smythe

sulking about thos beans

# ? Jan 18, 2019 22:28

andrew smash: Jun 26, 2006; smooth soul

Smirking_Serpent posted:

I [23f] stopped being overly accommodating when my boyfriend [21m] wants to reschedule things at the last minute. We haven't seen each other in 2 weeks.

My boyfriend kept cancelling or putting off things last minute because his friends ask him to hang out and he has major FOMO so he'll always say yes.

That was really frustrating for me because I have a much less flexible schedule than him. I work a full time job, he is a student. I do two sports, and he does one. I have hobbies that involve pre-planning such as backpacking and rock climbing, his main hobby is gaming which he can do anytime. I am looking for a new job and I am spending time at networking events and on teaching myself a new programming language, he doesn't spend much time on career development. He got his internships very easily at his dad's company, or through his dad's connections, and didn't need to spend time networking.

So to him, delaying or rescheduling something wouldn't be a big deal, because he doesn't have many solid commitments. For me, it is a big deal because I have a lot on my plate, and moving one thing will force me to shuffle my calendar, effecting several days.

For some time, I did that. Shuffling around my study time, skipping the gym, etc, to accommodate him wanting to put stuff off or reschedule last minute. Let's say we had a lunch date planned, and I wanted to go to a networking event after, and he was late for lunch, I'd let him push it off even if it meant missing my event. But I got sick of that, it was putting a lot of extra stress on me because I was inconveniencing myself.

So, these last few weeks, I've been treating my calendar as set-in-stone. If I have a gym trip or sport practice planned, I go. If I have studying or career development events planned, I do that. If I want to get to bed by midnight to be well rested for work,, I do. I don't shuffle things around or cancel my plans if my boyfriend shows up late or wants to reschedule.

A few examples were on a Saturday, I'd planned to go to the gym in the morning, have a lunch date with my boyfriend at 11:30 am, start studying for interviews at 2 pm, and go see my friends at 6 pm. My boyfriend texted me around lunch time saying he'd be running late, and could we do a late lunch? I said that I had plans at 2 so I'd need to be done with lunch by 2. We ended up not doing lunch because by the time he'd be ready to go, it was too late.

He wanted to come hang out at my apartment on Sunday and I said that I'd be free from 7 pm on, but I wanted to be in bed by midnight. He wanted to come over at 11:45 and I said that was too late, I was getting ready for bed.

One weeknight, we had a dinner date planned, and he got invited out to dinner with his friends. He went, and then said we could go out for dinner after that. He'd be full but he'd have a drink while I ate. But by the time we'd planned to go out, he was still out with his friends. And I didn't care to wait around for him, just to be the only one eating, so I made myself dinner and cancelled the date.

On Friday night, I threw a party starting at 8 pm that my boyfriend was going to come to, and even help me set everything up for. It wrapped up around 1 am, and my friends went home. Through the whole thing my boyfriend had been texting me saying he'd come over soon once his gaming group finished their campaign. Just a little bit longer, just a bit longer, etc. He showed up just as everyone was putting on their shoes and coats, and I told him to go home because I was going to bed. I was drunk and didn't want to sleep with him after he'd flaked on my party. He said that he thought it would be fine to show up at one am because usually my friends and I will party until sunrise. But we haven't done that since college.

He asked yesterday when we could hang out, and I told him my next free night is next Wednesday, and he got mad he'd have to book with me almost week in advance.

So, since I stopped accommodating his lateness and last minute delays and all, we haven't seen each other for 2 weeks except for when he showed up for the last 5 minutes of the party and I sent him home. We had plenty of stuff planned, but each time he tried to change the plan at the Last second, and I just stopped accommodating that.

I don't think I'm too much of a stickler for punctualness or schedules, it's been effortless to make plans with my friends and have them work out. I'm only having this issue with my boyfriend.

I don't know what to do from here.

TLDR - I stopped being so accommodating when my boyfriend was late to stuff, or wanted to reschedule things at the last minute. Ever since I stopped going out of my way and accommodating his flakiness, we haven't hung out in weeks.

Congrats on effortlessly breaking up with your boyfriend.

# ? Jan 18, 2019 22:29

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Smirking_Serpent posted:

I [23f] stopped being overly accommodating when my boyfriend [21m] wants to reschedule things at the last minute. We haven't seen each other in 2 weeks.

My boyfriend kept cancelling or putting off things last minute because his friends ask him to hang out and he has major FOMO so he'll always say yes.

That was really frustrating for me because I have a much less flexible schedule than him. I work a full time job, he is a student. I do two sports, and he does one. I have hobbies that involve pre-planning such as backpacking and rock climbing, his main hobby is gaming which he can do anytime. I am looking for a new job and I am spending time at networking events and on teaching myself a new programming language, he doesn't spend much time on career development. He got his internships very easily at his dad's company, or through his dad's connections, and didn't need to spend time networking.

So to him, delaying or rescheduling something wouldn't be a big deal, because he doesn't have many solid commitments. For me, it is a big deal because I have a lot on my plate, and moving one thing will force me to shuffle my calendar, effecting several days.

For some time, I did that. Shuffling around my study time, skipping the gym, etc, to accommodate him wanting to put stuff off or reschedule last minute. Let's say we had a lunch date planned, and I wanted to go to a networking event after, and he was late for lunch, I'd let him push it off even if it meant missing my event. But I got sick of that, it was putting a lot of extra stress on me because I was inconveniencing myself.

So, these last few weeks, I've been treating my calendar as set-in-stone. If I have a gym trip or sport practice planned, I go. If I have studying or career development events planned, I do that. If I want to get to bed by midnight to be well rested for work,, I do. I don't shuffle things around or cancel my plans if my boyfriend shows up late or wants to reschedule.

A few examples were on a Saturday, I'd planned to go to the gym in the morning, have a lunch date with my boyfriend at 11:30 am, start studying for interviews at 2 pm, and go see my friends at 6 pm. My boyfriend texted me around lunch time saying he'd be running late, and could we do a late lunch? I said that I had plans at 2 so I'd need to be done with lunch by 2. We ended up not doing lunch because by the time he'd be ready to go, it was too late.

He wanted to come hang out at my apartment on Sunday and I said that I'd be free from 7 pm on, but I wanted to be in bed by midnight. He wanted to come over at 11:45 and I said that was too late, I was getting ready for bed.

One weeknight, we had a dinner date planned, and he got invited out to dinner with his friends. He went, and then said we could go out for dinner after that. He'd be full but he'd have a drink while I ate. But by the time we'd planned to go out, he was still out with his friends. And I didn't care to wait around for him, just to be the only one eating, so I made myself dinner and cancelled the date.

On Friday night, I threw a party starting at 8 pm that my boyfriend was going to come to, and even help me set everything up for. It wrapped up around 1 am, and my friends went home. Through the whole thing my boyfriend had been texting me saying he'd come over soon once his gaming group finished their campaign. Just a little bit longer, just a bit longer, etc. He showed up just as everyone was putting on their shoes and coats, and I told him to go home because I was going to bed. I was drunk and didn't want to sleep with him after he'd flaked on my party. He said that he thought it would be fine to show up at one am because usually my friends and I will party until sunrise. But we haven't done that since college.

He asked yesterday when we could hang out, and I told him my next free night is next Wednesday, and he got mad he'd have to book with me almost week in advance.

So, since I stopped accommodating his lateness and last minute delays and all, we haven't seen each other for 2 weeks except for when he showed up for the last 5 minutes of the party and I sent him home. We had plenty of stuff planned, but each time he tried to change the plan at the Last second, and I just stopped accommodating that.

I don't think I'm too much of a stickler for punctualness or schedules, it's been effortless to make plans with my friends and have them work out. I'm only having this issue with my boyfriend.

I don't know what to do from here.

TLDR - I stopped being so accommodating when my boyfriend was late to stuff, or wanted to reschedule things at the last minute. Ever since I stopped going out of my way and accommodating his flakiness, we haven't hung out in weeks.

Are you experiencing any back pain? I think ther problem is that a spine is growing where there was none before.

# ? Jan 18, 2019 22:31

christmas boots: Oct 15, 2012; To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out; Biscuit Hider

chitoryu12 posted:

https://twitter.com/redditships/status/1086314848277987332?s=21

https://twitter.com/YellsOnPolitics/status/1086322318752841735

# ? Jan 18, 2019 22:39

Fuck Your Website: Nov 29, 2003; FUCK YOU, AND FUCK YOUR WEBSITE

Smirking_Serpent posted:

I [23f] stopped being overly accommodating when my boyfriend [21m] wants to reschedule things at the last minute. We haven't seen each other in 2 weeks.
TLDR - I stopped being so accommodating when my boyfriend was late to stuff, or wanted to reschedule things at the last minute. Ever since I stopped going out of my way and accommodating his flakiness, we haven't hung out in weeks.

This is just typical early-20s learning what is and isn't a dealbreaker in a longterm relationship.

That kind of terminal lateness and procrastination always indicates he gives no gently caress about you or your feelings, so it's time to grow up and reciprocate.

# ? Jan 18, 2019 22:46

Rubellavator: Aug 16, 2007

chitoryu12 posted:

https://twitter.com/redditships/status/1086314848277987332?s=21

Is it pedophilia if you date a grown person with the mind of a child.

# ? Jan 18, 2019 22:56

Papa Emeritus III: Jul 7, 2017; [A MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]

Dat's Pussy Trap, bitch!

_{_{Deal with it.}}

Bored posted:

No. He went to prison for assaulting his girlfriend after she told him she was going to be eating fruits and vegetables.

Edit: found the OP I'm talking about. No clue if the update's attached.
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/3m8zue/i_25_f_am_growing_tired_of_my28_m_boyfriend_of_45/

There is no rape in the first part of the story. Just a ridiculous list of stuff he won't eat.

Jesus. Eat a drat carrot, it doesn't turn you into a sissy pants. Don't be the vegetable version of the guy whose irrational fear of being suddenly gay from wiping or washing his skid-mark, shitstained butt crust. You won't suddenly look at a penis and be all "Saaaaay... :thunk:

" if you eat a food.

Honestly, a good example of a turn off for women is a man that is a picky eater. I also don't know a single woman, in my entire life, that digs the Mr. Testosterone type; Who identifies himself as a physical embodiment of that really lame book 'Alphabet of Manliness' by Maddox. Then add some Chuck Norris memes from 2005. Women lose interest in servicing that type of ego, only to get exhausting bullshit to deal with on a daily basis(such as the picky eating, each dinner is a strategy puzzle to solve). Sorry, I don't believe you crush top shelf pussy if you turn into an instant toddler with a meltdown if I cook you dinner and you unhinge over a salad. Woops, there went my impressed opinion of you, too! But, in all honesty, I kinda ate up that satire of over the top masculinity a handful of years ago. I'm a little bit responsible for adding to the lovely tropes due to that.

Xenocides posted:

And two things we all love: horses and masturbation. Plus a pro-tier username:

I [24F] live with my boss [52F] and I can hear her loudly masturbating almost every night.
u/tug-a-bug

Um. I think this is a fake one. The lady and her boss are very .... thin, I want to say. Like not real people. Too flat. Hard to explain. Could also be the writing. For now, I will have faith in the magic of the internet and believe it is real. That just leaves one more thing:

My question is what exactly is making the loud noise? Is it like moaning or is it a shoe stuck in the mud sound? I don't think that second one is able to be loud as gently caress. Is it a vibrator buzz? Is she going too much into the headboard and banging the wall? I am a little confused as to what noise it is and how she is loud enough to be heard on a phonecall in a different room. If it IS the shoe stuck in mud noise, that's a bit impressive and I also hope no horses are involved.

I do agree that it is awkward as gently caress to hear a person do their thing. Happened in boot camp and jail. I covered my head and ears to ignore the noise but you feel like you should cough or jingle the keys in your pocket to make a reminder of your presence, and maybe stop an uncomfortable moment but you don't because you realize it will be more awkward when she stops and then looks at you with either shock/embarrassment or annoyed/indignant for interrupting her private moment. Which happens to be in a not-so-private area but you're the rear end in a top hat for some reason. :shrug:

Wanna bet she's not rubbing her hot pocket and is just doing some random poo poo like run one of those feet spa devices? They make a buzz noise. Or maybe she can't sleep until she reenacts the battle of San Juan Hill?

# ? Jan 18, 2019 22:59

thotsky: Jun 7, 2005; hot to trot

Beachcomber posted:

Once someone hits 50 25 the only one who can help them is themselves. Don't count on them changing.

# ? Jan 18, 2019 23:06

Leon Einstein: Feb 6, 2012; I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

Biomute posted:

I used to be conservative until about 25 or so. I don't even really know what flipped the switch, but now I hate conservatism with every fiber of my being. The pointless wars probably had a lot to do with it.

# ? Jan 18, 2019 23:24

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

I [19/F] found out the guy I've been dating [20M] has a weight gain/feeder fetish.

quote:

I've been kind of dating a dude for about a month. We haven't gone beyond kissing. I have high functioning autism so I can get easily manipulated. I have a normal BMI albeit on the higher end of healthy. This dude has been buying me food often and I have to eat a little bit to not feel guilty. He borderline has to force feed me a lot. Every single day in university he comes to my class and brings me chocolate, crisps, McDonald's ect ect.

I work in a bar and his very drunk mate came in and told me he had a fat fetish. I was like okay whatever go home you're drunk but I dig some digging. Went through his ex's Facebook profile and saw how 3 years ago she was tiny. I then saw photos with her and him and her weight slowly ballooned. Her new profile picture is her who is now quite severely obese- at least 220lbs.

I talked to him about it and he admitted it. He said he finds girls who gain weight most attractive. I said I'm not going to do that and he said I'll find a way which I found really creepy and strange but to be completely honest he's always been slightly creepy but this time I can't look past it.

I don't know what to do. I think I should break it off but at the same time he's a lovely dude so idk my emotions are stopping me. What do I do?

TL;Dr found out my kind-of boyfriend has a feeder fetish and wants me to gain weight to be more attractive. What do I do??

# ? Jan 18, 2019 23:30

Whorelord: May 1, 2013; Jump into the well...

Beachcomber posted:

Once someone hits 50 the only one who can help them is themselves. Don't count on them changing.

My 60 year old mum has gotten insanely woke in the past few years. Became best friends with a non binary trans woman and made a point of sending me Facebook messages of her with a woman in a Niqab.

It's kind of weird but I guess it's better than my friend's dad having a meltdown over the gender neutral toilets at the university and refusing to go to his own son's graduation because of it I guess.

# ? Jan 19, 2019 00:19

Pope Hilarius II: Nov 10, 2008

Whorelord posted:

My 60 year old mum has gotten insanely woke in the past few years. Became best friends with a non binary trans woman and made a point of sending me Facebook messages of her with a woman in a Niqab.

It's kind of weird but I guess it's better than my friend's dad having a meltdown over the gender neutral toilets at the university and refusing to go to his own son's graduation because of it I guess.

Welcome to the Internet, where a man who names himself WHORELORD can have an extremely woke 60 year old mum.

Congrats tho

# ? Jan 19, 2019 01:27

Sagebrush: Feb 26, 2012; ERM... Actually I have stellar scores on the surveys, and every year students tell me that my classes are the best ones they’ve ever taken.

Haifisch posted:

I [19/F] found out the guy I've been dating [20M] has a weight gain/feeder fetish.

I don't know why, but the feeder fetishists creep me out more than just about any other non-violent fetish I've heard of. Like it's clearly abusive and harmful to the feedee's health, right? Except it's couched as "oh I just care about you and want you to eat well" and just I like find it way squickier than even the people who like to be choked or pooped on or whatever. Ughhhhh

# ? Jan 19, 2019 01:50

tactlessbastard: Feb 4, 2001; Godspeed, post; Fun Shoe

Sagebrush posted:

I don't know why, but the feeder fetishists creep me out more than just about any other non-violent fetish I've heard of. Like it's clearly abusive and harmful to the feedee's health, right? Except it's couched as "oh I just care about you and want you to eat well" and just I like find it way squickier than even the people who like to be choked or pooped on or whatever. Ughhhhh

I had a grandmother that would insist on serving tons of food and if you ever demurred her reaction would range from sulking all evening to throwing things.

Grandpa meanwhile would mock you ruthlessly for eating a gram more than depression era rations. It was a fun time.

# ? Jan 19, 2019 01:54

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

Sagebrush posted:

I don't know why, but the feeder fetishists creep me out more than just about any other non-violent fetish I've heard of. Like it's clearly abusive and harmful to the feedee's health, right? Except it's couched as "oh I just care about you and want you to eat well" and just I like find it way squickier than even the people who like to be choked or pooped on or whatever. Ughhhhh

Bonus creep points when you see one that straight-up admits their endgame is their partner being unable to move without help. Because that's not a red flag the size of China!

# ? Jan 19, 2019 01:59

datajugend: Jan 15, 2010; Cat Army

feeding is a pretty violent fetish imo

# ? Jan 19, 2019 02:01

Taima: Dec 31, 2006; tfw you're peeing next to someone in the lineup and they don't know

I've read every single page of this thread and have loved it for months, but I'm starting to have an almost visceral reaction to everyone who is like "X or Y is ruining my life, WHAT DO I DO THIS IS CONFUSING HELP?!?!"

You loving break up. Yep, you actually do that. I can't stand these goddamn retards who literally can't form a single cogent thought in their idiotic brains. It's making me subconsciously think they deserve it, which is unhealthy and mostly wrong, but holy loving poo poo how dense can you be.

Like I get that these people are, on some level, mentally ill. They are literally unable to walk away from the thing that causes their pain. The rational part of my brain knows that and accepts that. But like, how do you read this poo poo every day without becoming cynical...

# ? Jan 19, 2019 03:14

Beachcomber: May 21, 2007; Another day in paradise.; Slippery Tilde

Taima posted:

But like, how do you read this poo poo every day without becoming cynical...

Welcome to the Something Awful forums. Enjoy your stay.

# ? Jan 19, 2019 03:22

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Taima posted:

I've read every single page of this thread and have loved it for months, but I'm starting to have an almost visceral reaction to everyone who is like "X or Y is ruining my life, WHAT DO I DO THIS IS CONFUSING HELP?!?!"

You loving break up. Yep, you actually do that. I can't stand these goddamn retards who literally can't form a single cogent thought in their idiotic brains. It's making me subconsciously think they deserve it, which is unhealthy and mostly wrong, but holy loving poo poo how dense can you be.

Like I get that these people are, on some level, mentally ill. They are literally unable to walk away from the thing that causes their pain. The rational part of my brain knows that and accepts that. But like, how do you read this poo poo every day without becoming cynical...

I agree, but also

Beachcomber posted:

Welcome to the Something Awful forums. Enjoy your stay.

# ? Jan 19, 2019 03:31

ArbitraryC: Jan 28, 2009; Pick a number, any number; Pillbug

I think in a way it helps with the opposite of that. Like you read the stories for the first time and think "man they are dumb, they could just do x/y/z and bing bang boom problem solved" but as you go on the conglomerate of posts blends into a familiar tone of something regretful you did and you kind of accept that even the problems with the simple and obvious solution feels so much more imposing to the person struggling with it.

# ? Jan 19, 2019 03:33

Odd: Dec 30, 2006; I think everybody just needs to maybe cool out a little maybe

ArbitraryC posted:

I think in a way it helps with the opposite of that. Like you read the stories for the first time and think "man they are dumb, they could just do x/y/z and bing bang boom problem solved" but as you go on the conglomerate of posts blends into a familiar tone of something regretful you did and you kind of accept that even the problems with the simple and obvious solution feels so much more imposing to the person struggling with it.

Is this an ultimatum

# ? Jan 19, 2019 04:17

Papa Emeritus III: Jul 7, 2017; [A MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]

Dat's Pussy Trap, bitch!

_{_{Deal with it.}}

Taima posted:

I've read every single page of this thread and have loved it for months, but I'm starting to have an almost visceral reaction to everyone who is like "X or Y is ruining my life, WHAT DO I DO THIS IS CONFUSING HELP?!?!"

You loving break up. Yep, you actually do that. I can't stand these goddamn retards who literally can't form a single cogent thought in their idiotic brains. It's making me subconsciously think they deserve it, which is unhealthy and mostly wrong, but holy loving poo poo how dense can you be.

Like I get that these people are, on some level, mentally ill. They are literally unable to walk away from the thing that causes their pain. The rational part of my brain knows that and accepts that. But like, how do you read this poo poo every day without becoming cynical...

I also have a firm belief that people who are heavily involved with social media are also prone to airing their own details from humblebrag to dirty laundry. This includes the details of their relationship. To me, that's incredibly disrespectful to my significant other but, my opinion on that aside, I have come to realize that people won't talk to each other as a couple too. They especially don't discuss any issues that are legitimate concerns for breaking up when the problem appears and is small. They try to pester the masses online for an opinion instead of having a mature discussion, face to face, with their partner. Some DO try this but they're not familiar enough with communication on an intimate, respectful level, I imagine, and don't meet eye to eye as easily as they do with media buds. Or, even worse, they're used being in a agreeable echo chamber so any disagreements will just be a thing they will not let go. Partners don't need to have the same opinion on everything and its preposterous to expect that. Agree to disagree and don't be petty. If a bitch can't handle that, which is all basic human interaction with respect to privacy, then ... booooo. Sever. Burn it down. Online drama queens are a required mess to avoid, I say.

# ? Jan 19, 2019 04:18

cumshitter: Sep 27, 2005; by Fluffdaddy

Haifisch posted:

I [19/F] found out the guy I've been dating [20M] has a weight gain/feeder fetish.

In the comments for this one she agrees that he's a weirdo and that she should dump him. So happy ending there.

# ? Jan 19, 2019 04:25

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# ? Jun 4, 2024 23:21

Smirking_Serpent: Aug 27, 2009

AITA for laughing at my SO during sex?

2 things first: -She just got a smart watch. -She is not the most active during sex

So my SO and I were having sex. I'm on top and it's the usual, which is fine. I am always the one to suggest other positions and stuff, otherwise it would just be missionary/done. I've already got her off and I say "hey babe, wanna get on top?" Her" not really, if that's okay" Me "okay" (continues in/out)

Suddenly her watch starts vibrating and chiming. Me "what's up with that?" Her(without thinking)"oh it just does that when it thinks I've been sedentary too long" I bust out laughing. Can't stop. She get super grumpy about it. We stop.

I don't really care cause I appreciate the comedy. Now her feeling are kinda hurt :/....

# ? Jan 19, 2019 04:54

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