|
uberkeyzer posted:When Fantasy authors start inserting their own poetry into their novels is when the poo poo really hits the fan. From there, it's a short step to writing song lyrics. 
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 03:49
|
|
|
|
| # ? Jun 3, 2024 14:33 |
|
|
“guy” has been gender neutral for like ten years now
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 03:53
|
|
|
A human heart posted:malzberg is cool, you read much by him?
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 04:08
|
|
|
uberkeyzer posted:When Fantasy authors start inserting their own poetry into their novels is when the poo poo really hits the fan. Hey, it's metrical.
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 04:19
|
|
|
Sham bam bamina! posted:Only Herovit's World at the moment. I once found a lovely copy of Beyond Apollo and stupidly bought it for a friend instead of myself. I'll probably order it on AbeBooks tonight or tomorrow, now that I'm thinking about Malzberg again. I have a copy of Galaxies too, but I never got around to reading it because I wanted to read Beyond Apollo first (on the recommendation of the cool weirdo professor who introduced me to Malzberg and gave me the books), and I never got around to getting that because there are too friggin' many books out there. the only one i was able to find around here was the men inside which is like a really bleak funny take on the 'shrink people down and send them into a guy's body to treat cancer' sci fi idea. very cool unreliable narration and stuff, although some of his other books sound much wilder(galaxies is supposed to be a novel and a critical essay kind of thing at the same time or something like that).
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 04:23
|
|
|
ok i'm normally pretty good at identifying racist fantasy allegories but this one has me perplexedquote:Tvlakv was finally waddling up to Kaladin’s wagon with his bucket of water. The portly, brown-eyed man walked with a very faint limp; the result of a broken leg, perhaps. He was Thaylen, and all Thaylen men had the same stark white beards —regardless of their age or the color of the hair on their heads—and white eyebrows. Those eyebrows grew very long, and the Thaylen wore them pushed back over the ears. That made him appear to have two white streaks in his otherwise black hair.
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 05:15
|
|
|
i'm only like ten pages into the novel and i've been presented with about twenty named characters and at least five separate nationalities who are all at war with each other. but i have read one hundred years of solitude seven times, a devotion literally nobody else in my world understands, and now i feel like i'm finally facing the enemy i've spent my whole life training for
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 05:23
|
|
|
i feel obligated to add, i'm enjoying it, in the same way i enjoyed eragon e: hahaha what the gently caress quote:Tozbek was a short man, even-shouldered with Shallan, and he wore his long white Thaylen eyebrows up in a curious spiked pattern. It was like he had two waving fans above his eyes, a foot long each. quote:As for his praise of her supposed beauty, she took that for what it was. A kind, if overstated, mark of affection. She was pale-skinned in an era when Alethi tan was seen as the mark of true beauty, and though she had light blue eyes, her impure family line was manifest in her auburn-red hair. Not a single lock of proper black. pikachode fucked around with this message at 05:59 on Feb 3, 2019 |
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 05:25
|
|
|
what sanderson is trying to do with race and slavery in this book makes me extremely uncomfortable
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 06:09
|
|
|
Foot-long eyebrows? Are Thaylen actually Mothmen?
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 06:10
|
|
|
Antivehicular posted:Foot-long eyebrows? Are Thaylen actually Mothmen?
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 07:05
|
|
|
i'm sorry friends, i made it to the end of part one and now i can go no further. my time is worth more than this!!
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 09:50
|
|
|
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 10:07
|
|
|
i read 210 pages out of 1500 (!) and my impressions are as follows this is initially framed as the story of the ten tenors, who are fated to fight the same war over and over again for thousands of years, spending the time between wars in a vaguely defined hell dimension where they are tortured with burning chains. apparently they took this burden on by choice and can leave any time - which in the prologue nine of them do, leaving the tenth to... actually i don't know how he reacts, i never got that far we then skip forward 4500 years to the assassination of a king by some guy, who can do something called "lashing" which allows him to change an object's centre of gravity, which basically just means he can send it flying in whatever direction he wants. another type of lashing allows him to fortify an object. another lets him run really fast or something. he runs around killing people with a shardblade, which is like a sword that can cut through anything, and has a gravity fight with the king, who also has a shardblade, and wears a suit of armour complementary to the shardblade, which is called shardplate, and look i just don't care. but the king dies, and that sets off a war between his country and the nation who killed him, who were supposed to be his allies the nations/cultures presented thus far: - the alethi. they are a colonising superpower who wear lots of robes and jewels and have mastered some kind of magical superweapon, or multiple kinds, there are so many loving magical superweapons in this book that i just gave up. all have tan skin and black hair, but some have light eyes and some have dark, and the ones with light eyes (called lighteyes) are given high status in society, while the ones with dark eyes (called darkeyes) are a servant caste. the king who got killed is alethi, and so is the armyman protagonist and the redhead. the women keep their left hands covered at all times. much is made of this - the persh-something. there seem to be two distinct populations of this mysterious race that have little to do with each other; there is a persh-something nation far away, which ordered the assassination of the king and seems to be doing okay for itself, and then there are the pershmen, which are present throughout the text as household slaves and servants, ignored by society and described by the viewpoint characters as docile, silent and bestial. the persh have skin marbled black and red, but they have black eyes, and are obviously meant to be envisioned as black people, and so i did envision them as black people, and it made me think ill of slander hambantam. obviously, they are at war with the alethi - the eyebrow mothmen. the mental image of this just blew my mind and i cannot handle it. there's absolutely nothing else like it in the book, all the non-mothman human characters are described as dead boring homo sapiens and the setting is standard mirthless renfaire and then i'm supposed to just calmly accept a character with twelve-inch eyebrows that stand up like a fan. i can't do it. i just can't - veron or viren or something. tbh i can't remember. it's an alethi colony and obviously supposed to be where the white people live, as that's where one of the three protagonists comes from and she's the one who just cannot accept that she's beautiful because of her awful red hair and her dreadful porcelain complexion, so different to the swarthy ideal of alethi beauty - ninety seven thousand other loving places that have to get offhand references because they're on the map, i don't remember any of them but i'm sure they're all extremely racist but you don't need to know any of this because the first 200 pages are concerned with two stories, which i will outline after i've had another drink or six. just know there is no such thing as pacing, and heaven is a myth
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 10:31
|
|
|
Bonfire of the Genres: we then skip forward 4500 years to the assassination of a king by some guy
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 10:39
|
|
|
oh gently caress it, it is not even worth the time. did this poo poo seriously win the best fantasy book in the world award in 2010? seriously??
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 10:43
|
|
|
1500 loving pages jesus christ
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 10:45
|
|
|
our hero is an armystrong warrior whose stated motivation is to protect the young soldiers under his care, but whose drive for story purposes is to become a soldier in the king's army for reasons that seem purely based on nationalism and career trajectory. at the start of his tale we are introduced to a callow youth he adopts during a petty skirmish between two landlords, first being encouraged to piss by a gruff older man, then pissing in front of his fellow soldiers, then pissing again in his pants, then admiring our hero and finally being slaughtered by a shardblade samurai. that is the end of the callow youth. our hero is taken into slavery, tries to escape many times and fails every time, but is saved on the brink of despair by a small simple-minded modestly-clothed female fairy that only he can see. as we follow this uninspiring man we are introduced to several thousand named characters, none of whom will ever appear again, and we read about the layout of not just one but several army camps in excruciating detail. i can actually remember nothing that happens to him in the first 200 pages apart from what i've just written here, and i literally just read it
pikachode fucked around with this message at 11:07 on Feb 3, 2019 |
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 10:56
|
|
|
But how is the magic system?
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 10:59
|
|
|
Strom Cuzewon posted:But how is the magic system?
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 11:06
|
|
|
Why the gently caress is it called a soulcaster.
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 11:12
|
|
|
Strom Cuzewon posted:Why the gently caress is it called a soulcaster.
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 11:13
|
|
|
 If I want to attack Adolf Hitler's Mein Kampf in Book Barn outside of this thread, I am obligated to say that I enjoyed some part of it. Backhanded and sarcastic compliments to Hitler will be spotted
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 11:28
|
|
|
Love you.
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 11:32
|
|
|
BravestOfTheLamps posted:
everything is true, everything is false
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 11:34
|
|
|
Maybe you should read some good books and not that fantasy junk you're always posting about
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 11:54
|
|
|
Ras Het posted:Maybe you should read some good books and not that fantasy junk you're always posting about This is an amazing point: here is a good place to start e: lol quote:Marco Polo : Now I shall tell you of the beautiful city of Nottingham where the buildings are made mostly of blue glass, onyx and sausagemeat. The men of the city trade in fur, spices and photographs of each other with their respective spouses. All the men have large phalluses, sometimes so large they must cut pieces out of the tops of their front doors before they can exit their houses in the morning. This is a city of dreamers and anthropophagi, of astronomers and chess players, all with the largest of phalluses. The women of the city are the most voluptuous and lively. They wear clothes. Many times I have observed them gambolling and performing handsprings for sheer joy of being in Nottingham. The dogs of Nottingham are all sly and well-read. They play canasta and billiards mostly, but also trade junk bonds and enjoy swapping photographs of the men of Nottingham with their respective spouses. But describing the cats of Nottingham will tax me to the very limit of my powers, O mighty Lord - sebmojo fucked around with this message at 12:07 on Feb 3, 2019 |
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 12:02
|
|
|
Dude, I lived in Nottingham for a decade, and no-one plays chess.
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 12:23
|
|
|
lofi posted:Dude, I lived in Nottingham for a decade, and no-one plays chess. then perhaps all that marco polos tells us is similarly questionable
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 12:35
|
|
|
Unreliable penis
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 12:36
|
|
|
From now on, we can construe punishable negativity from BotL's failure to post about a particular book.
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 13:23
|
|
|
I notice BravestOfTheLamps has pointedly avoided posting in the Brandon Sanderson thread since he came off probation. Mods???
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 13:26
|
|
|
Eugene V. Dubstep posted:I notice BravestOfTheLamps has pointedly avoided posting in the Brandon Sanderson thread since he came off probation. Mods??? I'll pass it up the chain
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 13:42
|
|
|
Antivehicular posted:Back in high school, some Internet friends of mine and I found and mocked a very long, overwrought post-apoc Pokemon fanfic. I had the "brilliant" idea to write a parody of it using Homestar Runner characters instead. Luckily, this urge passed, but recently I found an old notebook from that era with a detailed drawing of cyborg Homsar and felt this amazing flood of retroactive shame. kind of ashamed of even writing this post TBH I just realized that, during the ten years or so I was an  artist, I didn't draw a single piece of fan art I was too concentrated on my all-original fantasy epic graphic novel. Yes, I've read no fantasy in my entire life, but I almost wrote some
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 13:54
|
|
|
if only more fantasy writers only fantasized about writing
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 14:26
|
|
|
Lex Neville posted:if only more fantasy writers only fantasized about writing I'm sorry, did I imply that I didn't write anything? Because that would be a mistake. If I can decipher my small-type chickenscratch cursive written in faded #4 pencil, survive the embarrassment, find the time to translate it, and lose the last shred of dignity that has kept my magnum opus a secret known to few, I can post excerpts of my sequel to a book that I hadn't written yet (because of course it was planned as a trilogy)
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 16:03
|
|
|
pikachode posted:shardplate lmao Why is Brandon Sanderson so famous? I literally had someone breathlessly describe one of his books to me the other day and the whole time I was thinking of this thread and here i come to find this treasure of a review BravestOfTheLamps posted:If I want to attack Adolf Hitler's Mein Kampf in Book Barn outside of this thread, I am obligated to say that I enjoyed some part of it. You should try Twitter, I think they have the same rule
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 16:21
|
|
|
welcome back brother pikachode posted:our hero is an armystrong warrior whose stated motivation is to protect the young soldiers under his care, but whose drive for story purposes is to become a soldier in the king's army for reasons that seem purely based on nationalism and career trajectory. at the start of his tale we are introduced to a callow youth he adopts during a petty skirmish between two landlords, first being encouraged to piss by a gruff older man, then pissing in front of his fellow soldiers, then pissing again in his pants, then admiring our hero and finally being slaughtered by a shardblade samurai. that is the end of the callow youth. our hero is taken into slavery, tries to escape many times and fails every time, but is saved on the brink of despair by a small simple-minded modestly-clothed female fairy that only he can see. as we follow this uninspiring man we are introduced to several thousand named characters, none of whom will ever appear again, and we read about the layout of not just one but several army camps in excruciating detail. i can actually remember nothing that happens to him in the first 200 pages apart from what i've just written here, and i literally just read it read the rest e: poisonpill posted:Why is Brandon Sanderson so famous? I literally had someone breathlessly describe one of his books to me the other day and the whole time I was thinking of this thread and here i come to find this treasure of a review vast mormon conspiracy to saturate fantasy's ideological landscape with their sexweird polytheism as an answer to tolkien's catholicism chernobyl kinsman fucked around with this message at 16:31 on Feb 3, 2019 |
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 16:26
|
|
|
BravestOfTheLamps posted:
However will the people of Book Barn criticize Mein Kampf without your trenchant insights.
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 16:41
|
|
|
|
| # ? Jun 3, 2024 14:33 |
|
|
bb poster 1: more praise for hitler's literary craft and prose mastery...my weapons are useless against it bb poster 2: if only i had skimmed the reading for lit 101...if only i hadn't read so many fantasy books... bb poster 1: will a hero not save us??? *looks to the sky* botl: *rattling bars in posting jail* you must let me go!!
|
|
#
?
Feb 3, 2019 16:53
|
|