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Jet Jaguar
Feb 12, 2006

Don't touch my bags if you please, Mr Customs Man.



Important updates from JK Rowling

Harry Potter fans are always hungry for more fascinating insights about the amazing Wizarding World, and J.K. Rowling just provided us with another wonderful tidbit: She has revealed that Harry Potter currently suffers from erectile dysfunction,which he treats using a proprietary blend of medicinal herbs available for $49.99 on Rowling’s personal website.

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BravestOfTheLamps
Oct 12, 2012

by FactsAreUseless
Lipstick Apathy
The Rowling articles are good.

Cleretic
Feb 3, 2010


Ignore my posts!
I'm aggressively wrong about everything!
It's short, but they hit exactly my sense of humor with Disconcerted Woman Has No Memory Of Telling Dressing Room Attendant Her Name.

Lysidas
Jul 26, 2002

John Diefenbaker is a madman who thinks he's John Diefenbaker.
Pillbug
(Just a picture) Nancy Pelosi Signals Support For Environmental Causes By Placing Green New Deal Directly Into Recycling Bin

Carthag Tuek
Oct 15, 2005

Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
slægt skal følge slægters gang




:hmmyes:

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


Seems Extreme: Jacob Farted During Math And The Marines Wheeled Him Out Of The Classroom In One Of Those Hannibal Lecter Straitjacket Things With The Muzzle

morallyobjected
Nov 3, 2012
short but good:

Southern Poverty Law Center Admits They Have No Idea How Dannon Yogurt Company Got On Annual List Of Hate Groups

zoux
Apr 28, 2006

https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1096501927746170880

Extremely disappointed this is just a picture, rather than my favorite type of article, the esoteric pun related government process story like Clinton Threatens To Drop Da Bomb On Iraq or National Funk Congress Deadlocked On Get Up/Get Down Issue or Fritolaysia Cuts Off Chiplomatic Relations With Snakistan or Bo Obama Receives Visiting Dognitaries From Furuguay

Aramek
Dec 22, 2007

Cutest tumor in all of Oncology!
Every so often I still read that article about Woofington DC.

SimonChris
Apr 24, 2008

The Baron's daughter is missing, and you are the man to find her. No problem. With your inexhaustible arsenal of hard-boiled similes, there is nothing you can't handle.
Grimey Drawer

https://www.clickhole.com/foodies-rejoice-this-chef-make-a-hamburger-1832468254 posted:

Who would’ve thought about the hamburger unless a chef make it? That’s precisely what this chef make—a hamburger that was burger to the bone, and nothing but! The chef (no name) give it all the right stuff a hamburger require to be make: The shape (mound), the smell (hamburger), the distance (near!). Foodie, did you honestly not believe hamburger could be done? Well, it looks like this chef make a hamburger out of food...and fool out of you!

https://www.clickhole.com/foodies-rejoice-this-chef-make-a-hamburger-1832468254

venus de lmao
Apr 30, 2007

Call me "pixeltits"


quote:

an onion (purple) is atop the beef (indeed it is there!)

I do not see an onion (purple) atop the beef (is it indeed there?)

Sulla Faex
May 14, 2010

No man ever did me so much good, or enemy so much harm, but I repaid him with ENDLESS SHITPOSTING

Bertrand Hustle posted:

I do not see an onion (purple) atop the beef (is it indeed there?)

You idiot (pathetic!!), did you not believe onion (purple) could be done??

venus de lmao
Apr 30, 2007

Call me "pixeltits"

Sulla Faex posted:

You idiot (pathetic!!), did you not believe onion (purple) could be done??

Truly I, Foodie (shut up!!!) am a loving idiot (pathetic!) for doubting that a chef could make hamburger.

Dr. Arbitrary
Mar 15, 2006

Bleak Gremlin

Devastating: Watch This Guy Realize That When He Overhears People At Work Talking About ‘The Hamburger Dipshit’ They’re Referring To Him

Lysidas
Jul 26, 2002

John Diefenbaker is a madman who thinks he's John Diefenbaker.
Pillbug
I lol'd.

A Sponsored Content Deal Fell Through After We Already Did The Work, So Enjoy These Brandless Pictures Of People Happy About A Blue Liquid

venus de lmao
Apr 30, 2007

Call me "pixeltits"


Now is the time for my blue liquid company to make an IPO

prefect
Sep 11, 2001

No one, Woodhouse.
No one.




Dead Man’s Band

Dr Christmas
Apr 24, 2010

Berninating the one percent,
Berninating the Wall St.
Berninating all the people
In their high rise penthouses!
🔥😱🔥🔫👴🏻
When did Kelly stop doing silly parodies and start doing actual right wing cartoons?

Aramek
Dec 22, 2007

Cutest tumor in all of Oncology!
THE "WHOLE ENCHILADA"

gently caress yeah.

venus de lmao
Apr 30, 2007

Call me "pixeltits"

I'm the I HATE WALLS tattoo

Orange Fluffy Sheep
Jul 26, 2008

Bad EXP received
I'm the THUG tattoo.

Golden Bee
Dec 24, 2009

I came here to chew bubblegum and quote 'They Live', and I'm... at an impasse.
I ❤️ caravans

Zereth
Jul 9, 2003



Dr Christmas posted:

When did Kelly stop doing silly parodies and start doing actual right wing cartoons?
I don't think even actual right-wing cartoons blame taco bell

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


It's really unfortunate that Literally Unbelievable doesn't update any more, cause you just know that there are people out there taking Kelly cartoons seriously.

Kennel
May 1, 2008

BAWWW-UNH!
I'm the angry eyebrows hidden under the hat.

Robert Denby
Sep 9, 2007
Denial isn't just a river in Egypt, huh? Nah, get fucked mate.

ultrafilter posted:

It's really unfortunate that Literally Unbelievable doesn't update any more, cause you just know that there are people out there taking Kelly cartoons seriously.
When the Kelly cartoons first started appearing, I thought The Onion was just licensing out lovely political cartoons from some right wing paper as a joke.

Zereth
Jul 9, 2003



Kennel posted:

I'm the angry eyebrows hidden under the hat.
Those are scars

doctorfrog
Mar 14, 2007

Great.

I'm the © © nipples

Mr.Radar
Nov 5, 2005

You guys aren't going to believe this, but that guy is our games teacher.
https://twitter.com/ClickHole/status/1098633597181980672

https://twitter.com/pointclickbait/status/1098741977309270017

Mr.Radar has a new favorite as of 02:36 on Feb 22, 2019

clown shoes
Jul 17, 2004

Nothing but clowns down here.
https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1098973690039955458

clown shoes
Jul 17, 2004

Nothing but clowns down here.
Chicago Police Credit Their Extensive Experience Falsifying Evidence For Helping Solve Smollett Case

Evil Mastermind
Apr 28, 2008

Trump Demands William Barr Prove Loyalty By Putting Gun In Mouth, Pulling Trigger

break-up breakdown
Mar 6, 2010

https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1100121518334504960

Ariong
Jun 25, 2012

Get bashed, platonist!

https://youtu.be/YlIwRLFW1FA

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


He’s A Staunch Republican. She’s A Bleeding-Heart Liberal. They Don’t Know Each Other Or Anything. Who Knows Where We Were Going With This.

The MSJ
May 17, 2010

Last Chance
Dec 31, 2004

holy poo poo

morallyobjected
Nov 3, 2012
:drat:

Evil Mastermind
Apr 28, 2008

Jesus

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The MSJ
May 17, 2010

I like how he drags ET into this.

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