Newspaper Spider-Man: ARRGH! She said the N-WORD!

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > BSS: Bisexual Super Son > Newspaper Spider-Man: ARRGH! She said the N-WORD!

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3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

Alhazred posted:

In Norway newspapers have actually stopped printing Phantom strips because they don't think it's good enough.

Did he... go to Australia?

# ? Mar 17, 2019 20:20

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# ? May 24, 2024 01:01

Lurdiak: Feb 26, 2006; I believe in a universe that doesn't care, and people that do.

# ? Mar 17, 2019 20:21

TheNamedSavior: Mar 10, 2019; by VideoGames

Well, so much for that.

Good Night, Sweet Prince. May you be remembered as the strip that climaxed on the main hero forgetting he has two hands.

Best Worst Comic Strip Ever.

And thank you, SA NSM Threads I lurked obsessively, for helping me get through hard parts of my life with your hate-love for this gloriously stupid comic. May your brains avoid the falling of bricks.

Thank You.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 00:13

Synthbuttrange: May 6, 2007

WE'RE NOT DONE YET!

TSA-Man!

# ? Mar 18, 2019 00:23

ConfusedUs: Feb 24, 2004; Bees?
You want fucking bees?
Here you go!
ROLL INITIATIVE!!

omg please let this end with someone finding the spidey suit

# ? Mar 18, 2019 00:27

Proteus Jones: Feb 28, 2013

Synthbuttrange posted:

WE'RE NOT DONE YET!

TSA-Man!

He's gonna get outed as Spider-Man, get arrested for all the incidental destruction of the city (not to mention a hospital in Miami, and various Lenny related destruction in LA), and then sued into oblivion by all the owners of theaters, hospitals, and other buildings.

The last strip will be Peter in jail and MJ having to move in with Aunt May.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 00:54

Lobok: Jul 13, 2006; Say Watt?

When a TSA agent wants to speak to you it always makes you seem more innocent when your wife stage-whispers you something in secret.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 00:56

Tunicate: May 15, 2012

It's gonna get escalated to the president again and Trump will lock him up.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 00:57

Bruceski: Aug 21, 2007; The tools of a hero mean nothing without a solid core.

Tunicate posted:

It's gonna get escalated to the president again and Trump will lock him up.

Trump reads the Bugle as his only newspaper source.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 01:12

Otherkinsey Scale: Jul 17, 2012; Just a little bit of sunshine!

It's really going to be the end of an era if the next strip reveals Peter actually anticipated this problem for once in his life.

TheNamedSavior posted:

Well, so much for that.

Good Night, Sweet Prince. May you be remembered as the strip that climaxed on the main hero forgetting he has two hands.

Best Worst Comic Strip Ever.

And thank you, SA NSM Threads I lurked obsessively, for helping me get through hard parts of my life with your hate-love for this gloriously stupid comic. May your brains avoid the falling of bricks.

Thank You.

Although personally, I wouldn't call this hate-reading. Ducking into the comic strip megathread I saw a lot of comics that were just painful and weird (which is why I didn't start reading that thread regularly, lol).

NSM is completely nonsensical, but overall it's just really lovable. The art's wonky, but it's never an eyesore. The plots never make sense, the dialogue is stuck in time, but somehow it's totally charming.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 01:21

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

Have you seen Border Patrol: Australia's Front Line? Because Parker is hosed.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 01:21

Samuringa: Mar 27, 2017; Best advice I was ever given?

"Ticker, you'll be a lot happier once you stop caring about the opinions of a culture that is beneath you."

I learned my worth, learned the places and people that matter.

Opened my eyes.

The Kid grew up and is now a surveillance chief. Peter is going to get brought to his room and he'll just ask why he still isn't an Avenger. The End.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 01:23

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

Well you see this webbing is still viable and might germinate in I UNDERSTAND SIR THAT IS NOT RELEVANT I'M TELLING YOU YOU SHOULD HAVE DECLARED THIS

# ? Mar 18, 2019 01:26

David D. Davidson: Nov 17, 2012; Orca lady?

"Is this Raccoon your son?"

# ? Mar 18, 2019 03:01

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

David D. Davidson posted:

"Is this Raccoon your son?"

Sir you did not declare this raccoon!

# ? Mar 18, 2019 03:06

Endless Mike: Aug 13, 2003

We'll never get to see MJ's reaction to an apartment full of deflated balloons when they return from Australia.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 03:07

MorningMoon: Dec 29, 2013; He's been tapping into Aunt May's bank account!
Didn't I kill him with a HELICOPTER?

Please let the final panel be the "why arent you an avenger?" kid

# ? Mar 18, 2019 03:08

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

"Sir, you appear to have a dead purple man in your suitcase."

"No no, it's fine. He's just hibernating."

# ? Mar 18, 2019 04:29

nimby: Nov 4, 2009; The pinnacle of cloud computing.

He packed the lead lined security blanket.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 07:00

Jerusalem: May 20, 2004; Would you be my new best friends?

TSA Agent: Mr Parker, we opened your suitcase and there is no Spider-Man suit inside.
Peter: Of course not, I didn't want you know that I, Peter Parker, am in fact secretly Spider-Man.
TSA Agent: ...but... but we all know. We've always known. Look the fellas and I got together and bought a backup suit for you to pack.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 07:41

Choco1980: Feb 22, 2013; I fell in love with a Video Nasty

ArmyOfMidgets posted:

Please let the final panel be the "why arent you an avenger?" kid

This would make me so happy.

Oh nooooo

# ? Mar 18, 2019 10:43

ManlyGrunting: May 29, 2014

I am going to miss this comic, I really am.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 12:15

head58: Apr 1, 2013

Tunicate posted:

It's gonna get escalated to the president again and Trump will lock him up.

This, but Stan Lee is the president and I never stop crying over this terrible amazing comic.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 12:16

E the Shaggy: Mar 29, 2010

ArmyOfMidgets posted:

Please let the final panel be the "why arent you an avenger?" kid

The final panel is Clown 9 turning toward the reader:

"I CAN SEE YOU!"

# ? Mar 18, 2019 14:20

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

E the Shaggy posted:

The final panel is Spider-Man turning toward the reader:

"YOUR MONITOR IS ACTUALLY TURNED OFF... PETER!"

# ? Mar 18, 2019 16:35

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

I've burnt through my backlog of 1977 Spiderman, so now it's going to be one or two a post.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 19:06

Qwertycoatl: Dec 31, 2008

Haifisch posted:

Does MJ know at this point that Peter is secretly a Spider Man?

# ? Mar 18, 2019 19:37

Lobok: Jul 13, 2006; Say Watt?

Qwertycoatl posted:

Does MJ know at this point that Peter is secretly a Spider Man?

In a word, no. She won't be written as definitely knowing but it's up to you to read it as though she does know. In 1984 MJ revealed to Peter in the comic books that she knows, and then later on it was revealed that she always knew. But here in '77 in the comic strip everyone's operating under the assumption she doesn't.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 19:47

Push El Burrito: May 9, 2006; Soiled Meat

Haifisch posted:

I've burnt through my backlog of 1977 Spiderman, so now it's going to be one or two a post.

I absolutely adored how insane MJ used to be.

It also actually led to a really good Spider-Man scene where Pete is having a bunch of problems with his personal life as usual and MJ is being her usual kind of shallow and fun-seeking self and complains he's being a downer. Pete basically tells her he's going through some poo poo and if all she cares about is fun all the time she can go find it somewhere else. She heads to the door and instead of leaving just closes it and spends some time trying to help him. Peter and MJ are perfect and I will never forgive Quesada basically.

Push El Burrito fucked around with this message at 19:52 on Mar 18, 2019

# ? Mar 18, 2019 19:49

davidspackage: May 16, 2007; Nap Ghost

Dad, you're the end.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 19:51

Cat Mattress: Jul 14, 2012; by Cyrano4747

"Maaad lad" is a mannerism that seems to have disappeared at some point, but it's amusing to see Aunt May gets all her news from J Jonah Jameson.

# ? Mar 18, 2019 20:25

Party Boat: Nov 1, 2007; where did that other dog come from

who is he

Peter Parker, the absolute mad lad

# ? Mar 18, 2019 21:14

Lobok: Jul 13, 2006; Say Watt?

Push El Burrito posted:

I absolutely adored how insane MJ used to be.

It also actually led to a really good Spider-Man scene where Pete is having a bunch of problems with his personal life as usual and MJ is being her usual kind of shallow and fun-seeking self and complains he's being a downer. Pete basically tells her he's going through some poo poo and if all she cares about is fun all the time she can go find it somewhere else. She heads to the door and instead of leaving just closes it and spends some time trying to help him. Peter and MJ are perfect and I will never forgive Quesada basically.

"But Peter, you hardly ate a thing!"
"Oh I had a big lunch, Mrs. Watson. But ah, you're not worried I'm about to drive your niece into the middle of a superhero battle?"
"Hush now and run along. I took out an insurance policy on her years ago!"

# ? Mar 18, 2019 21:45

dupersaurus: Aug 1, 2012; Futurism was an art movement where dudes were all 'CARS ARE COOL AND THE PAST IS FOR CHUMPS. LET'S DRAW SOME CARS.'

Push El Burrito posted:

I absolutely adored how insane MJ used to be.

It also actually led to a really good Spider-Man scene where Pete is having a bunch of problems with his personal life as usual and MJ is being her usual kind of shallow and fun-seeking self and complains he's being a downer. Pete basically tells her he's going through some poo poo and if all she cares about is fun all the time she can go find it somewhere else. She heads to the door and instead of leaving just closes it and spends some time trying to help him. Peter and MJ are perfect and I will never forgive Quesada basically.

Wait MJ used to be Cheryl Tunt?

# ? Mar 18, 2019 21:57

Escobarbarian: Jun 18, 2004; Grimey Drawer

Maad About the Lad

# ? Mar 18, 2019 21:58

quite stretched out: Feb 17, 2011; the chillest

Party Boat posted:

Peter Parker, the absolute mad lad

# ? Mar 19, 2019 00:14

Jerusalem: May 20, 2004; Would you be my new best friends?

Push El Burrito posted:

Peter and MJ are perfect and I will never forgive Quesada basically.

I'm so glad Newspaper Spider-Man's brief dalliance with keeping in line with main comics continuity got abandoned and they went,"Nah Peter just had a months long dream about fighting bad dudes" and went straight back to a happy marriage that could only be made better by the inclusion of a beautiful space-son racoon.

# ? Mar 19, 2019 00:37