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Kennel
May 1, 2008

BAWWW-UNH!

Somfin posted:

New Dwarf Fortress artifact generation looks solid

quote:

This is a copper crown. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. On the item is an image of the ship with a copper cup with a small copper cup on the top. This will be a part of my mod as a tribute to a mod of mine called Bikini! It's an awesome ship with a fantastic crew, but unfortunately there are people who think it's a fish tank. (Hint: It isn't!)

The mod is currently looking for anyone who would be awesome to work with! I do not own any of its assets. It is my intention to make it as an addon and for it to have a stable release.

This item is also part of the project, which is not affiliated with Bikini! (Though Bikini will be mentioned in it!)


Mod: Bikini: Ship of the Day 2014 by Zuul

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Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

My name is Dr. Worm.
Good morning. How are you? I'm Dr. Worm.
I'm interested in things.
I'm not a real doctor,
But I am a real worm;
I am an actual worm.
I live like a worm.

You, you can't live too.
Don't worry if you have a body you can't use.
Just try to get along with me.
Do you wanna see?
Worm? Yeah?
How long have you known?
I can't find out!
It is your body.
You say it is your body, but it is a piece of paper inside of a computer. It is like your body but not you, not you either.
"I am a worm", said Professor Terezi.
He was talking about Worm in the cartoon The Simpsons.
Now you see how the difference between a real human being and a worm is that a real human being exists in the real world and has relationships with other humans in the real world.
So then Professor Terezi could use this as his point of view.
The thing about Worm is that although many of the words of his


Who the gently caress is Professor Terezi?


Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?
Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality
Open your eyes, look up to the skies and see
I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy
Because I'm easy come, easy go, little high, little low
Any way the wind blows doesn't really matter to me, to me all of it

I've seen more tears of death than tears of joy I've seen more joy than tears of anger
And to this day it makes my heart ache for you...
There is just nothing
I can ever give up for you - I'll miss you
In the end, this game is an experiment in "inclusive" music design. I see it as a celebration of indie music and a reminder to give musicians all of the credit of their creation, even if it's not always "their" creation.
Thanks very much for your time and I wish you all a happy new year. And here is the track list for this year:
If you are interested in more music and have not heard

Checked myself into emergency, urgently.
Drove up in my bone-camarrow, thinking only about you.
The doctor walked her crew of surgeons to the table where I lay
I came to, and my knee-caps were off.
They were soft, I had Jellybones
and put the rest back.
Served the rest of my men like a man; the old-timers thought it was a trick.
I tried all they could do: I asked the doctor how badly they were broken, and how I couldn't help.
No answer, and they tried again.
Then a new surgeon came in, and the old boy told me that if I asked if that was the right surgeon, and if she were my mother, I should be a nurse.
He said I was not a nurse, but he was not a doctor, and so I asked my doctor to be my surgeon; so she wrote a letter for me.
She told me I couldn't have a nurse, and I gave her my consent.
She said she could see my knee-caps off from time to


Look at this photograph
Every time I do it makes me laugh
How did our eyes get so red?
And what the hell is on Joey's head?
This is where I grew up
I think the present owner fixed it up
I never knew we ever went without
The second floor is hard for sneakin' out

When is your sister gonna find out?
And then we're in here
And then the camera's on me,
Where the flicks when we turn
Now that we're in this room
What is this place? I'm just a young boy
Look at these photographs
And what is that?
Look at this photograph
Every time I do it makes me laugh
How did our eyes get so red?
And what the hell is on Joey's head?
This is where I grew up
I think the present owner fixed it up
I never knew we ever went without
The second floor is hard for sneakin' out
When is your sister gonna find out?
And then we're in here
And then the camera's on me,
Where the flicks when we turn
Now


Seems like cheating to just repeat the first verse verbatim, but I'm a human so idk
And wtf "where the flicks when we turn"???


Deep throat a whole Nutty Buddy
Make whoopie to a batch of Silly Putty
to make a perfect P-bomb to your friends
Or just play with a P-bomb and have some fun.
To Make A P-Bomb
Step 1: Pour a little bit of liquid (if you don't have a bowl, try the bottle) on your hand and rub it down into whatever you would like to make a perfect P-bomb.
Step 2: Make sure you do at least one of the following.
Step 3: Put a small pinch of glue on the top and bottom of any of the edges you'd like to create. (Not sure if these two can be done just as smoothly, but they seem to work wonders.) Place the P-bomb on paper and stick it on some tape. This will keep the glue from sticking if the P-bomb starts to come apart.
Step 4: Now take it over to your hand and carefully push the glue onto the P-bomb.
Pour it in slowly and with precision.
You can actually pull it straight out

Well, son, I’ll tell you:
Life for me ain’t been no crystal stair.
It’s had tacks in it,
And splinters,
And boards torn up,
And places with no carpet on the floor—
Bare.
But all the time
, I'll lay
A floor over you on a tarp,
A floor over your head—
The carpet, so smooth,
That it's like the white of the night.

I think of the day when we‪‬ got to work together.
It was an eventful couple years.
He was still my son, by the way, so I'm a bit choked up when I think of that.
Anyway, in September I was having that thought, ‪‬�I‪‪ll tell you what‪‬,  I‪‪ll tell you what?
I will tell you: All right, son,‪‬� I will tell you what‪‬ I will tell you: ‪When you are young—‪
In middle school— in middle school—‪It‪s your turn.�
In middle school— in middle school—‪You‪ are to get out of bed,
And for me to get into bed,
And make my bed.‪‬
Not in a way that you'll worry about it.
‪It‪s a long story,

Brawnfire has a new favorite as of 14:52 on May 9, 2019

Ruffian Price
Sep 17, 2016

I don't think the DF guy is gonna ever use an algorithm he doesn't have absolute control over :(

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule



Whybird
Aug 2, 2009

Phaiston have long avoided the tightly competetive defence sector, but the IRDA Act 2052 has given us the freedom we need to bring out something really special.

https://team-robostar.itch.io/robostar


Nap Ghost
This thing really doesn't get what Beckett was trying to do.


quote:

Estragon: Let's go.
Vladimir: We can't.
Estragon: Why not?
Vladimir: We're waiting for Godot.
Estragon: (despairingly). Ah!

Estragon: You can't wait. Godot was just too easy. Godot was fun. If one had to wait for Godot... wait. I'll wait! What? I'll stay and wait? I'm a monster.
(Itachi looks at Yuri. He turns around and heads upstairs to see them. Before his eyes there is a giant man with grey hair holding a huge hammer out over Yuri. He looks so happy that he looks like he just won the lottery.)
The Guy: Yuri itachi! It's me, Godot!
The Guy: I'm glad you survived! I came for you, too, but because Godot wanted you all to live he killed you.
I'm sorry, Yuri. Godot wanted to know if you wanted to live.
Godot: I would never have asked if anything. If you don't like it, you should ask yourself why you have lived at all.
The Guy: I understand.

Farecoal
Oct 15, 2011

There he go

Ruffian Price posted:

I don't think the DF guy is gonna ever use an algorithm he doesn't have absolute control over :(



"And if it's not something important, we'll cover that too", yep

Baron von der Loon
Feb 12, 2009

Awesome!

quote:

It was the dawn of the third age of mankind – ten years after the Earth-Minbari War.

The Babylon Project was a dream, given form. Its goal: to prevent another war, by creating a place where humans and aliens can work out their differences peacefully. It's a port of call – home away from home – for diplomats, hustlers, entrepreneurs, and wanderers.
 And it's what makes the Travelers want to go. Their ships leave Babylon, and the Travelers find they can't travel as long as they're outside of Babylon. They make for an ideal place – free from the rule of law.

So a long time ago, a bunch of scientists from another planet came to Babylon. They settled here when they could, for the chance to make their plans for peace. The first scientist to sign a treaty with them? A member of the House of Harbel.

After a long time.

A new name for war

That man was Harbel
I, uh, think it kinda lost the plot halfway there.

Dick Trauma
Nov 30, 2007

God damn it, you've got to be kind.
"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to walk the path that leads from madness to sanity. Time to die a slow and agonizing death." ―Kylo Ren

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Space: the final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. Its continuing mission: to explore strange new worlds. To seek out new life and new civilizations. For and on behalf of the United Earth-based Species, this is our final statement about the Earth's place in the vast universe. I am Captain Kirk of the Starship Enterprise. This is our last warning.

And so, Earth has long known that, despite being the home of almost everything, our race, Earth, is also inhabited. On other planets, especially, we have found ourselves in the situation of being a slave to our neighbors; and, indeed, here we appear in a situation of servitude and domination. In that sense, of course, we stand alone, isolated from the rest of the universe.

But there is another way in which we see this from the other side; one in which we are not alone, but the other side: We are "the whole cosmos around us." This, more


I'm not racist but this is wrong," he said.

"I can't explain why people come to this island to get away from this problem. This is not healthy for us," said Ms Menezes, who is the head of women's rights at the city's mayor's office.

Media playback is unsupported on your device Media caption What has happened to the city of Cape Town?

She said the city had the biggest problems in terms of crime with gang violence, but the violence there was far less than elsewhere in South Africa.

"In Cape Town - or Cape Town in general - it is very rare to see a man and woman getting hit by cars with knives because, as you probably understand by now, if someone is hitting your car, they might be with other men, they might be doing something similar to what happened here," she said.

The problem is often brought on by young men not knowing what to do if they get too close to one of the gangs.

"They've got to be careful

Brawnfire has a new favorite as of 19:45 on May 9, 2019

Friend
Aug 3, 2008

I may have gotten carried away with the cast in my Star Wars fanfic




Darth Vader: Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your father.

Luke: He told me enough! He told me you killed him!
I knew what was true. I know that! I am still a Star Wars fan.

Luke: And how would you feel had somebody like Darth Vader been living amongst you like me?

Garth: You may not be the first Jedi to become Darth Vader's equal. But he should have a little time to kill!

Luke: I can't forgive myself.

Kylo Ren: And you can't forgive others until they admit what they've done.

Bert: It was a small price to pay.

Luke: Look at the girl for once, Bert and I may have an emotional connection, but there is a much deeper one.

Jabba Desilijic Tiure: Now, my lord, I have come to you with orders. Your brother, my friend, Luke Skywalker, has fallen and he will soon be lost. I'm going to take the last Jedi, not so long ago.

Han Solo: Han, you made Luke my friend

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

quote:

Woah-oh, we're halfway there
Woah-oh, we're halfway there
Woah-oh, we're halfway there
The music's coming from over here
The music's coming from over here
The music's coming from over here
The... the music's already here. (The music stops before getting to the opening theme .)
So the theme is, let's play a game. In this case, that game is a "Fantasy RPG" of sorts and I'm sure this isn't even close to being an actual game but hey. In order to do that, we have to create a character. One thing I didn't know was that if I'm creating a character, in order to keep things consistent between games, if I was going to change anything like a character's class, class name (which usually is a key part to creating a character), appearance, etc. then I would really have to adjust all of the data and models for each game I was creating.

Like, comment, and subscribe.

End of Shoelace
Apr 5, 2016

quote:

For twelve years you have been asking: who is John Galt?
Why has he been called Satan? Is he a satan? How do you know he is? Why are all those other questions not being answered?

After all, he was the guy who gave up his life as a writer to set it free. After his death he was asked about his life and revealed the truth about how he lived it. He was the guy who put a Bible on his face and said he was speaking to other people. He was the guy who walked away from this life and turned himself into a man. So if he's got a bad reputation, then why are the stories of him being a satanist and then his being a great writer still being told?

A few years ago, I called someone in his office at the Salvation Army. I said, "I'm here to ask you about these old stories about satanism being connected to Galt. Is there any truth to it?" He said, "Of course."

EDIT: uh oh

quote:

asd-hindi/","tag":"Trumpette"},"marimba","votes":-1":"mrb","tag":"Lovingly Caressing Donald's Junk","votes":-2":"yes","tag":"Trumpette","votes":0},"maripoofreduce","votes":-1":"theory","tag":"Down With Trump","votes":-2},"marty_mitch","votes":-4":"I've been looking forward to the second time it'll happen,"tag":"Donald's Cum Dumpster","votes":0},"maustic_maze" "I mean, what's he have to do with this?" -michael_snyder","votes":-1":2,"tag":"Shits himself at the sight of a Hijab","votes":0},"marchinja7","votes":-1":"I'll buy that!","tag":"Nazi","votes":0},"marchonas","votes":-2":"Not to mention the rest of the people supporting him. And the others who aren't so crazy.","tag":"Socks to Watch Out For","votes":0},"martymarchonascorp","votes":0},"maustin-mitch","votes":-1":"the more you hate Trump, the more likely you are to be against me. He's already killing American POWs and

End of Shoelace has a new favorite as of 23:27 on May 9, 2019

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Let's try feeding it nonsense, like this poorly translated screen from Final Fantasy Tactics:



quote:

Ramza: "I didn't think the God made holy stones but... more evil... well... Lucavi made them to land in this world..." Lucavi: "I am afraid of your evil deeds..." Lucavi: "...I will go there again, so let's pray." <Lucavi leaves> Lucavi: "Please pray for our lives..." Lucavi: "And leave with good thoughts." - End Of Cutscene - --- --- *** END OF SWORE OF LUNA CHANGE ********************* ------------------------------------- *** SWORDS OF LAVA CREDITS ********************* ------------------------------------- This was a small file that took me quite a while. I didn't do anything extra. I merely used the text I wrote in the spell book (I'm sure it was written with one hand as a base) and used a piece of paper to scribble away words from the spell. After that, I just copied/ed it like normal. However, since it was written in German, I thought I should translate it into English. So here it is, written as a German spell

I want to play SWORDS OF LAVA

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

quote:

Now, this is a story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute
Just sit right there
I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel Air

And the truth of my story is
For some reason, my wife had an abortion
She said she had never been pregnant
So I thought she'd come home like this
I looked up old friends and all of them were dead
I started running around, trying desperately
Just to find somewhere on the road where I could
Forget about my own children who I had lost
We ran into somebody who talked all about me
I said that I'd found him in a cemetery
He got mad at me for having a secret
So he started talking with me about all the strange people he'd heard of
One of them was a preacher who called himself 'Dr. Dr. Kool-Aid'
He said that the whole world's a bunch of idiots
I'd never really been that bad
He said

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

lmao

Lord Hydronium
Sep 25, 2007

Non, je ne regrette rien


The Metamorphosis, by dril:

quote:

“im not owned! im not owned!!”, i continue to insist as i slowly shrink and transform into a corn cob. the corn cob still follows me at first , i get upset enough to fight back and i yell that there were other things i wanted to do, like go to school, get married or just sit by myself at home. the corn cob finally stops following me! i continue to scream at it for 2 seconds, then a crackler is dropped on my head, and suddenly it stops.

“did this ever happen to you? why did you go inside the house with it”

“my name is lincoln the corn cob, and i love it!” i scream back, but nothing is heard from it.

it then suddenly comes out of the closet and starts to chase me around, but then the c

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

This is probably really weird, but I made a twitter using a name generator and a pic from thispersondoesnotexist.com and I'm posting things from this Talk to Transformer site.

https://twitter.com/BelinhaClacher

Fun so far!

Rollersnake
May 9, 2005

Please, please don't let me end up in a threesome with the lunch lady and a gay pirate. That would hit a little too close to home.
Unlockable Ben
Got a good reason
For taking the easy way out
Got a good reason
For taking the easy way out, now

She was a day tripper
One way ticket, yeah
It took me so long to find out
And I found out
it was easy
There's a reason why
That's why she's with me
I'm coming to get you

My car is coming to take you
My car is coming to take you
This ain't no lie
My car is coming to take you

She's a day tripper
one way ticket, yeah
It took me so long to find out
And I found out it was easy

There's a reason why
That's why she's with me
I'm coming to get you
She's a day tripper

I'd really like you for anything
But you're still out there
You're still out there
I'm waiting for my chance to talk to you again

But if there's no problem,
I don't want to talk about anything
Cause then my momma's not here
It's never been easy

She's a day tripper
one way

Dick Trauma
Nov 30, 2007

God damn it, you've got to be kind.

Fister Roboto posted:

Now, this is a story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute
Just sit right there
I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel Air
And the truth of my story is
For some reason, my wife had an abortion

:drat:

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

quote:

What the gently caress did you just loving say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the gently caress out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my loving words. You think you can get away with saying that poo poo to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life and you call a job. You're loving dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and

wait what

(i only input the bold part)

Tiggum
Oct 24, 2007

Your life and your quest end here.


Talk to Transformer posted:

Heard joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Physician tells him the worst thing is if he doesn't do something, he won't make any money.

Phanatic
Mar 13, 2007

Please don't forget that I am an extremely racist idiot who also has terrible opinions about the Culture series.

Fister Roboto posted:

wait what

(i only input the bold part)

Uh...whoa.

quote:

What the gently caress did you just loving say about me, you little bitch? And what were you thinking? That I couldn't take it? That I couldn't take your cock in my mouth? That you could take it in your loving dead on loving bitch hole? That you needed it badly, you little bitch? You're practically begging for my cum...you know you are...you loving horrible, you know that? You think I'd let you finish jerking off in my warm, tight oval office? That you thought I'd just let you lay there and enjoy it while you had me pinned to the floor cowering? Thinking those disgusting thoughts only brought you closer to climax, didn't it? So close...So loving... [SFX: She jerks him up, then lets him go, then begins again] [sigh] Mmm...this was...this was such a surprise, didn't it? I can't even begin to tell you how much I wish you'd let me cum, but you wouldn't, would you? Would you even care? You couldn't, could you? You

Gloomy Rube
Mar 4, 2008



quote:

Along the shore the cloud waves break,
The twin suns sink behind the lake,
The shadows lengthen
In Carcosa.

Strange is the night where black stars rise,
And strange moons circle through the skies

The stars are black;
The sea is blue and sparkling,
The rivers run red-eyed,
It is a strange land The land is not fair,
But there is plenty to eat
We live out here on an island near the southern tip of California. With a little more luck, we might still have all the wonders of the world here in California: a beautiful ocean, a place to live long after our winters are out, a beautiful desert, a beach that's hot and blue, a place to eat and live, a sea that's cold and rough—everything that is good for people and nature. I am a long way from the beach on the northern side of Carcosa. However, that's OK. Carcosas, we think, could be

so from this info, I can place Carcosa's location to be somewhere around Baja California.

Friend
Aug 3, 2008

This is my new favorite one so far:

Skeletons!  This was a surprise.  I've seen them at my daughter's birthday parties.   The new ones are so different than the old ones.  The old ones were huge and full-boned.  The new ones are small, with one big claw on the top half of the face and the front half of the body.
I like them a hundred percent.   I love the fact that they have little feet instead of arms.   And if I look carefully, these skeletons are shaped like a claw - the same one that you see in the movies of Dr. Claw (not my favorite).
I love the claw-like bones, and the fact that they've got very little space between them.  These skeletons are actually pretty big, so a lot of bones need to be filled with blood to make a big claw look really huge.  I can't believe I live in Michigan and they're still alive.  I have to find the claw bone, so I'll continue to search.  Also, the claws are not just for hunting though. 

Ruffian Price
Sep 17, 2016

Fister Roboto posted:

wait what

(i only input the bold part)

I assume enough people have posted the exact copy of that text on the Internet that the network has an entire brain region dedicated to it

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Phanatic posted:

Uh...whoa.

That's dirty!

Anal sex is safest when ursine is on hand. (2, 3)

The average male may masturbate to the point of death and have a good sense of self worth. His dick should be an open sore that needs to be rubbed. He shouldn't be worried about his anal hair sticking out. (2)


When she is in heat, women rarely go into deep throating sessions. She is likely to start after the sex is over. She doesn't need to get her clitoris stretched out and hard for that. She wants to go to town with her man on the cock. She is very much looking forward to her pleasure and she has a good sense of self worth! (1)


While women are having a sex session they get ready for a shower. They make it a point to cover their face and neck with towel and their hair is combed and tied into a braided bun. (4)


Edit: PS: Ben Shapiro is a monstrous, ugly piece of poo poo that is a cancer to America. He's a disgusting, sick, sad piece of poo poo that needs to be removed from reality. He's disgusting, sick, sad. He's disgusting, sick, sad. He's disgusting, sick, sad. He's disgusting, sick, sad. And it's on the side of the house, too. But because he's a fascist, we can't just leave him alone. I'm going to take on Trump, and I'm going to take out his loving son."

Brawnfire has a new favorite as of 02:53 on May 10, 2019

R.L. Stine
Oct 19, 2007

welcome to dead gay dog house
*Zizek voice*

I find the most erotic part of a woman is the boobies.

It's that little thing in your chest. What if the boobies are the ultimate sexual sensation? Do you know what I think about those girls? They know! It's no surprise they know. They have it. I've never met a woman who does not know. That's why in my mind as an eroticist, I try to find it where none was there before, and in my mind as an artist, I have my own unique way of looking at this. [Crazy laughter] I am a sexy artist. Why do I call myself sexy? Because I am very well acquainted with all these wonderful ladies who have their boobies and I can't get enough of them! I like this idea, this whole idea that we are all sexual creatures, and that we can all have sexual desires, but that we also have a body that doesn't lie. What is a body that does not lie? Do you know what?

Well, as we know, breasts are pretty much the most erotic part of a man

WITCHCRAFT
Aug 28, 2007

Berries That Burn
The last few pages have been wild. The kind of thing that makes you grin and chuckle and you cannot stop yourself from doing it. And you couldn't tell anyone "what's so funny?" because this is beyond bizarre.

buglord
Jul 31, 2010

Cheating at a raffle? I sentence you to 1 year in jail! No! Two years! Three! Four! Five years! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!

Buglord

Phanatic posted:

Uh...whoa.

This bot knows how to make straight-turned-gay porn scripts :allears:

Carthag Tuek
Oct 15, 2005

Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
slægt skal følge slægters gang



Friend posted:

I may have gotten carried away with the cast in my Star Wars fanfic



why is everyone sleeping on this? shame on yall

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Krankenstyle posted:

why is everyone sleeping on this? shame on yall

Holy gently caress, I didn't even realize that was a gif. Yeah, you're right!

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

A SCP that's a booby trap for researchers

quote:

SCP-XXXX

SCP-XXXX-1's inactive garment. Credit █████████

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is to be kept in a sealed container at Bio-Research Lab 6-██ at Sector 27-█, High Point Avenger during Standard Operating Procedures best practices until it is repaired. The method of recovery of SCP-XXXX is to employ a mix of ██ Foundation agents and Foundation intelligence.

Description: SCP-XXXX is a black and silver working hat made of wool that is partially worn by a person that can utilize [DATA EXPUNGED]. It is unknown what substance(s) actually make up one's clothing, but given SCP-XXXX's very small size, it seems probable that the fabric itself is anomalous. When worn, SCP-XXXX provides an anomalous initial effect for anything that studies it, enabling them to understand what that human has previously written. Human researchers do not display this anomalous capacity unless they have entered SCP-XXXX's area of effect, in which case rather than writing, they simply write the words written in SCP-XXXX-1 to the nearest one solitary surface. This effect is further enhanced over time, although the amount of space affected increases with each writing event. They are exceptionally difficult to read even for experienced researchers, however, not to mention impossible for unskilled ones.

SCP-XXXX-1

Upon examination, the front of the items wrote precisely one word: ANCIENT. This has been analyzed, and conclusion appears to be that the words are created by the minds of the humans who wear it. SCP-XXXX-1 is composed wholly of archaic chalk short-hand, which has remained unchanged at the exposure exposure time. It is proven that this pencil has never been very popular in historical circles.

The interior of SCP-XXXX-1 looks like a giveable medieval-earth quality writing set[REDACTED], yet is not. However, the writing does not appear to be permanent or coherent, as SCP-XXXX-1 has yet to write the same message both accessing and spreading in the Foundation archives. Research will be held at post until it can be determined what, if anything, these writings actually do.

Neophyte
Apr 23, 2006

perennially
Taco Defender

Batman posted:


I'm Batman, and my parents are deeeaaaaaaaadddddddd!!!!!!!?" "I'm Batman, and I'm a detective, and I'm a detective and I'm cool!" "No, I'm Batman, and I'm a hero, and I'm cool like you!" "I'm Batman, and I'm a hero, and I'm on my bike, and I'm cool!" "I'm Batman, and I'm a hero, and I'm cool like you, and I'm cool!" "I'm Batman, and I'm a detective, and I'm cool! Like, I'm Batman, and I'm a detective..." "I'm Batman, and I'm a detective, and I'm a detective, and the police aren't like cops that look like me, they're like really cool detectives that look like me that look like me. I'm Batman, and I'm a detective! And I'm a cool superhero! I'm Batman, and I'm a detective! Like I'm Batman, and you're Batman, and you're Batman!" "I'm Batman, and I'm a detective… And you're Batman, and you're Batman!" — Bruce Wayne vs. Joker, The Batman #31 [1]

We are all Batman on this blessed day!

Beer_Suitcase
May 3, 2005

Verily, the whip is ghost riding.



I think I broke it.

Subway spiderman dance off turns deadly. 
????? ????? ???????? ????????????? ?.? ????? ?? ?? ??? ?. ? ? ? ?? ?? ??? ? ?. ? ? ?? ?? ?? ??? ?? ? ?. ? ?? ?? ?? ??? 0 ?? ?? ?? ?? ??? !?? ????? ??? ?? ? ?? ?? ?? ? ??. ? ?? ?? ?? ?? ? ?? ? ??. ? ?? ?? ?? ?? ? ?? ?? ?? ? ??. ? ?? ?? ?? ?? ? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ?? ??

Samovar
Jun 4, 2011

I'm 😤 not a 🦸🏻‍♂️hero...🧜🏻



In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.

And the earth was waste and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep: and the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters

And God said, Let there be light: and there was light.

And God saw the light, that it was good: and God divided the light from the darkness.
And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And the evening and the morning were the first day.

And there was evening and there was morning, the fourth day. And God said, Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters.

And God made the firmament, and divided the waters which were under the firmament from the waters which were above the firmament: so that the waters which were under the firmament were milk and honeycomb; and the waters which were above the firmament were food for cattle and...

Started off pretty good, then... kinda lost the plot. Also, couldn't finish it.

Edit: To continue the blasphemy...

In the name of God, the Almighty, the Merciful.
Praise be to God, the Lord of the worlds.
The Almighty, the Merciful.
Sovereign of the Day of Judgment.
You alone we serve, and You alone we seek for help.
Guide us to the straight path.
The path of those whom You have blessed, not those who have incurred the wrath, nor the misguided.

O believers! As for Your righteous decree: "If You forgive the sinners and bring the righteous to trial, they are not the losers; " (Isn't Allah with Whom to forgive?")
I believe that everything you do in the world is lawful and that you will always be on guard against evil.
You shall never have a fear of death.
Indeed, Allah alone is Majestic and Majestic at the end of days.
And so we warn you of the evil days that are coming upon you in this world, and in the Hereafter.
O Allah, Your Mercy is great, and your Blessings are as the leaves of a tree whose fruits, if you will be

Samovar has a new favorite as of 05:19 on May 10, 2019

Beer_Suitcase
May 3, 2005

Verily, the whip is ghost riding.



I have no way to explain why I find these so hilarious.

Wario cant see him own dick. But that isn't important here. Wario, you see, doesn't see your dick as something that can only be seen. Wario does not know what you want, and he doesn't care. He has had your penis for a very long time and would love to find out anyway. So, if we talk about how you're supposed to have seen Wario's dick, we're talking about how to get closer to that goal. But the question isn't, can you get there? the question is, How can you move closer to it? How do you actually get closer to it? How do you get closer to it without actually seeing it? To get closer, you need "what" to move closer to.


Get close to the "what"

Loomer
Dec 19, 2007

A Very Special Hell
We got the guillotine
We got the guillotine, you better run.

(sing-song) We're here because we have a right to protect
And for that we get the guillotine.
(chorus) We got the guillotine, you better run, we're here.
Songs: This is what we were born to do
Music: This is what we were born to do
we got some fuckin big words here, this is what we were born to do
We got everything here, we got everything to do
And it's only when we come here
There's nothing we don't do, we got a loving great time
That's what you guys say when you're going on tour,
If you're out here, you've got your own lives,
We just live off touring
It's just going to keep going on,
But I don't know if you knew, that I'm good at getting
All the girls on the phone and just, we know that, if we were on tour
Well, what would we say? That this was the last year of it?
That we got rid of the bad ones and we got rid of the good ones,
'Cause they all came over to our home, they went to school
The best years and we know they're gone from here on out
And I'll tell you how many boys they had in our lives
And it doesn't do much either if we didn't have the balls
To actually listen to all of them
And you know what? It's a bitch in my book.
'Cause when we go down all the places he'll take us
We ain't going to change the world for nothing
But when you hear 'round that time my man we've been through it all
There's no more room for error
When you come to the end of your rope
And the only thing we got left to do
'Cause when I wake up and fall down there's nothing left to do

[Written by Richard Harris and David Mack (aka J.R.) / Remastered by William Rees]

mrpwase
Apr 21, 2010

I HAVE GREAT AVATAR IDEAS
For the Many, Not the Few


Loomer posted:

We got the guillotine
We got the guillotine, you better run.

(sing-song) We're here because we have a right to protect
And for that we get the guillotine.
(chorus) We got the guillotine, you better run, we're here.
Songs: This is what we were born to do
Music: This is what we were born to do
we got some fuckin big words here, this is what we were born to do
We got everything here, we got everything to do
And it's only when we come here
There's nothing we don't do, we got a loving great time
That's what you guys say when you're going on tour,
If you're out here, you've got your own lives,
We just live off touring
It's just going to keep going on,
But I don't know if you knew, that I'm good at getting
All the girls on the phone and just, we know that, if we were on tour
Well, what would we say? That this was the last year of it?
That we got rid of the bad ones and we got rid of the good ones,
'Cause they all came over to our home, they went to school
The best years and we know they're gone from here on out
And I'll tell you how many boys they had in our lives
And it doesn't do much either if we didn't have the balls
To actually listen to all of them
And you know what? It's a bitch in my book.
'Cause when we go down all the places he'll take us
We ain't going to change the world for nothing
But when you hear 'round that time my man we've been through it all
There's no more room for error
When you come to the end of your rope
And the only thing we got left to do
'Cause when I wake up and fall down there's nothing left to do

[Written by Richard Harris and David Mack (aka J.R.) / Remastered by William Rees]

It's the motherfuckin Coup
With Boots
Richard Harris
David Mack (aka J.R.)
and me, William Rees the Funkstress

Loomer
Dec 19, 2007

A Very Special Hell
This thing actually makes some pretty plausible Coup lyrics.

"Get down, get down, get down
It's almost 10 o'clock, see, I gotta ball of lint for property
So I slip my beanie on sloppily
And promenade out to take up a collection
of all of
Your favorite things, my favorite things, mine
You make me want to turn my nose up
I'm so sick and tired of this
loving hot and sticky, I really am
I hate the way the world works
But then I know I'm not alone

My footsteps echo in the darkness
My teeth clenched tight like a fist in the cold sharp mist
I look down and I hear my stomach growling

In the darkness I see things I don't know about
What is left of my eyes I am still able to see my body
I've been searching for the last month
But my search ended in regret
The darkness keeps us all in the dark
It makes us think nothing matters
We can't go out at night
When the night is dark we sit staring at what lies

And we wonder if we even believe
We don't know our future
Our eyes are still a bit wide open, but it seems they are still open to the light
It makes us wonder if you ever truly care
But if you do see the light you never smile, don't you know that
You never take a step away from your own fears
It makes us wonder how long
We can keep the fear for so long
And what would we do without it all? What would we do with the fear?
We could."

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Mister Olympus
Oct 31, 2011

Buzzard, Who Steals From Dead Bodies


e: "It's called Foot and Tooth, and we have been looking for it all day." has me rolling



oh my god

Mister Olympus has a new favorite as of 08:36 on May 10, 2019

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