A Moose posted:

we didn't start the fire

RobattoJesus posted:

I'm an extremely beautiful woman in a LABORATORY doing SCIENCE with my HAIR. My shampoo has NANITES in it so that my hair doesn't lose any IONS also it has GINKO BALOBA to ward off CANTONESE GHOSTS.

Pick posted:

Phy posted:

I thought Cantonese ghosts were just white people

That said, shampoo that wards off white people would be pretty useful

sneakyfrog posted:

i will take the shampoo to mordor

sneakyfrog posted:

i will take the shampoo to mordor

Fleta Mcgurn posted:

And my Axe!

Karate Bastard posted:

I too exclusively eat people who identify as Christian.

Snowglobe of Doom posted:

What a weird coincidence, I only eat fish who identify as christians. I'm an episcopescetarian.

RFC2324 posted:

What happens if a white person uses it tho

Pick posted:

ulex minor posted:

does anyone have that quote that was from i think one of those fyad roast battles that involved a description of one of the posters setting up a giant fake CD attached to his ceiling fan?

quote:

Yeah sorry im late i just got back from the hospital... no im fine, i had to take heebs-g. uh-huh. yeaaaaah. like this:

So im talkin to heebs about this and that and i mention ive been listenin to Cuban Linx 2 and he gets all excited and says "you know wha? I just finished an album myself!" and i was like, whoa, i didn't know you did... music? and he said "yeah bro yeah! i make raps!" and im thinking oh my god and he says "i was gonna wait till friday to let it drop but if you wanna come over i can give you a sneak peak" and im thinking oh my god i gotta hear this

so we drive over to his place and on the way im asking him about his raps and all and he starts doing these unbefuckinglievable freestyles, with like 5-second pauses between words and his eyebrows all knit together like he cracking codes, but they sounded like this:

"i got a grill so big if i were a dragon i could cook hot dogs on it/
i call my friends bro not dogg, dog gone it/
whenever anyone tries to rag me on it/
i tell them theyre dillwads and to stuff a wad of rags in it"

and im doing my best to look real serious while hes mean-muggin and FINALLY we get to his house and he goes in this back room and i hear all this thrashing around and im thinking, poo poo does he actually have boxes of cds back there, is he unpacking things, what's going on and finally i hear him yell "hey come give me a hand with this" so i go back there and he's got this... oh my god. this thing:

as far as i can tell its like a kiddy pool, but covered in aluminum foil. and like theres all these holes in it, with barcode stickers... from everything man. cut-out barcodes from frosted flakes taped in. in the holes. hundreds of them. and i realize he doesnt have boxes of cds, he MADE HIS OWN ALBUM, like, out of stuff. like he understands that cds are shiny and digital but beyond that... im not gonna try and figure this out man but just take my word for it, he was proud as poo poo of this thing

ok so it wasnt going to fit through the door, so he said he'd show it to me "in the studio," which was this lovely room covered in foil scraps and tapewads and like answering machines from 1994, and i said "but i can see it real good man" and he laughs and pulls out this laser pointer and says "bro. you need to HEAR it!" and then he gets this double-handed grip on the laser pointer right, juts out his tongue and aims and shoots the laser. and he starts moving the laser dot real slow and careful like in a circle, around the "cd". and im thinking oh my god he actually thinks this will make sound somehow. he thinks hes gonna make raps come out of that thing. and he starts moving the laser faster and faster and gets this look, man, like this horror shock, like wile e. coyote trying to run in midair.

and i tell him--im about to bust a gut trying not to laugh at his arts-and-crafts cargo cult poo poo--i tell him real gentle "hey man youre an innovator. you made the album, you can make a way to play it" and then i left and loving cracked up

but then that night like 12:30 am i get this call, from heebs number but hes not on the phone, i hear this wheezin, then finally i hear heebs real weak saying "bro... bro... the cd... can't breathe" so i rush over there and hes, ok, hes in his bedroom, theres a huge hole in the ceiling, the ceiling fan is on top of the cd, and the cds on top of heebs... he loving tried to duck tape his cd to a ceiling fan so it would spin. and it all fell on him and broke two ribs.

i couldnt keep myself from laughing... and hes laying there all covered in plaster wheezing at me all angry like "fuhhc hayooo bbro" and its makin me laugh even harder. i felt kinda bad for encouraging him but man... what was he thinking

cumshitter posted:

whoops wrong thread

cumshitter posted:

whoops wrong thread

Head Bee Guy posted:

what is this? why is there packing material inside it? it was in a dumpster

Outrail posted:

Can you fit in it? Have a friend nail it shut and dump you off a bridge to be sure.

Snow Cone Capone posted:

it's a BDSM fetish thing

I'm not joking

Snow Cone Capone posted:

Realistically though it's probably some goth idiot:

BigBadSteve posted:

Failed DIY project, it took the maker so long to get round to finishing it that he died of old age.

TODD BONZALEZ posted:

Hermit goths live in them op, when a goth gets too big for their coffin they move into a bigger one, and a smaller goth moves into it

Pinecone Sample posted:

putting "this end up" on a coffin seems like a good gag for a cartoon from when we were kids that wouldn't fly now

mind the walrus posted:

This place remains dead and gay as ever, but I forgot you guys could be some of the funniest loving people.

GBS - i found a coffin in the trash

slave to my cravings posted:

Some white yoga bitch who has never done anything interesting in her life wanted some attention. Prove me wrong.

Big Beef City posted:

No content in the OP, only a signature.

Mods?

Krankenstyle posted:

conquering the worm

value-brand cereal posted:

General Bullshit › Im callin it right now that Hawaiian hiker faked the whole thing

value-brand cereal posted:

General Bullshit › Im callin it right now that Hawaiian hiker faked the whole thing

FilthyImp posted:

This Week on Our American Experience, Luxon Berru-Ingot walks skid row in search of her father. During Act 2, Arhenn-Hummus Mignonette confronts the perils of capitalism in the lunch line at Middle School. And to close it off, Willam Wiliam-Williams gets a vasectomy.

NoneMoreNegative posted:

Hot Karl Marx posted:

https://twitter.com/Guy48Nice/status/1133048328806121472?s=19

o7

Loden Taylor posted:

The parking lines are white, symbolizing the purity of their motives when answering the call to serve.

The single red parking cone reminds us of the lives of these Americans, and their loved ones and friends who keep the faith, while seeking answers.

The lone potted juniper reminds us that all plants in the Garden Center are 25% off today.

Smythe posted:

I'd rather get my balls pumped off by eels and poison bugs than read this thread. I'd rather jam a can of kerosene up my rear end ream myself with an active tiki torch than endure this piece of poo poo thread. Hell, I'd prefer to strap myself into an iron maiden and have every dear richard letter read to me than plunder these pathetic pages.

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

GD_American posted:

https://www.wkrg.com/news/mobile-co...ce=twitter_WKRG


The table is round – to show our everlasting concern.
The cloth is white – symbolizing the purity of their motives when answering the call to serve.
The single red rose reminds us of the lives of these Americans….and their loved ones and friends who keep the faith, while seeking answers.
The yellow ribbon symbolizes our continued uncertainty, hope for their return and determination to account for them.
A slice of lemon reminds us of their bitter fate, captured or missing in a foreign land.
A pinch of salt symbolizes the tears of our missing and their families.
The lighted candle reflects our hope for their return.
The Bible represents the strength gained through faith to sustain us and those lost from our country, founded as one nation under God.
The glass is inverted – to symbolize their inability to share a toast.
The chairs are/chair is empty – they are missing.

SniperWoreConverse posted:

Moss update: the Moses are becoming more powerful than I expected, they're all growing pretty rapidly

Orkin Mang posted:

dont touch my xbox bro thats hallowed ground!!

muggins posted:

https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3821570

https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/goonbas/e/6/7623.0001.jpg

This ad shows GoT end spoilers

Arrhythmia posted:

I'm sorry to hear that learning Jon kills Daenerys and that Bran takes the Throne upset you

StrixNebulosa posted:

gently caress off, it's better to be polite with spoilers than not. Can we get those ads removed?

Arrhythmia posted:

No need for the hostility, I agree with you. Mods please remove the ad that says Jon kills Daenerys and Bran takes the throne

Facebook Aunt posted:

IUG posted:

So that ad came out before the last episode aired. Was there a leak of that last episode? That would have been a hell of a guess.

Son of Thunderbeast posted:

sebmojo posted:

There was a credible leak of the whole season floating around after ep 2.

nooneofconsequence posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tVR5Ju8gNys

marijuanamancer posted:

i mean doesn't falling to death send you to the climber version of Valhalla

Johnny Walker posted:

Tallfalla.