[Latin America] Lulag Archipelago

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [Latin America] Lulag Archipelago

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Pener Kropoopkin: Jan 30, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
(and can't post for 20 days!)

zegermans posted:

has anything happened worth noting lately? I keep seeing Bolton throwing passive aggressive tweets

Every day another person or group of people die from the effects of US sanctions.

# ? Jun 10, 2019 22:30

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# ? Jun 8, 2024 23:46

Corky Romanovsky: Oct 1, 2006; Soiled Meat

Pener Kropoopkin posted:

Every day another person or group of people die from the effects of US sanctions.

worse than the invisible radiation of Chernobyl

# ? Jun 10, 2019 22:36

THS: Sep 15, 2017

Pener Kropoopkin posted:

Every day another person or group of people die from the effects of US sanctions.

actually the sanctions never had any effect, which is why we did them

# ? Jun 10, 2019 22:36

CharlestheHammer: Jun 26, 2011; YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!

actually the sanctions only effect the government.

somehow

# ? Jun 10, 2019 22:53

ikanreed: Sep 25, 2009; I honestly I have no idea who cannibal[SIC] is and I do not know why I should know.

syq dude, just syq!

CharlestheHammer posted:

actually the sanctions only effect the government.

somehow

Truth through typo.

# ? Jun 10, 2019 22:54

Homeless Friend: Jul 16, 2007

THS posted:

actually the sanctions never had any effect, which is why we did them

# ? Jun 11, 2019 03:11

Ramrod Hotshot: May 30, 2003

lol

https://twitter.com/EudaimoniaAstro/status/1135943285615222784

here's the article, which is definitely worth a read though the source has a typically liberal/pro-coup bias. The author almost seems blithely unaware at how clownish he's making Guaido and his supporters appear.

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2019/06/10/venezuelas-two-presidents-collide

# ? Jun 11, 2019 05:01

brugroffil: Nov 30, 2015

Following in Reagan's footsteps

# ? Jun 11, 2019 16:53

hazardousmouse: Dec 17, 2010

valenzia?? like the oranges?

# ? Jun 11, 2019 17:24

Fast Luck: Feb 2, 1988

Ramrod Hotshot posted:

lol

https://twitter.com/EudaimoniaAstro/status/1135943285615222784

here's the article, which is definitely worth a read though the source has a typically liberal/pro-coup bias. The author almost seems blithely unaware at how clownish he's making Guaido and his supporters appear.

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2019/06/10/venezuelas-two-presidents-collide

Highlights from the astrologer:

quote:

Away from the crowd, Dav�d informed me that Guaid� was a descendant of Guaicaipuro, a sixteenth-century indigenous chieftain who had fought the Spanish conquest before being ambushed and killed. Ch�vez had resurrected Guaicaipuro as a national hero, ordering that his remains be symbolically reinterred in the National Pantheon. Seeing my bemusement, Dav�d explained that all of Venezuela�s leaders were the reincarnations of predecessors. Ch�vez wanted to be Sim�n Bol�var but was really Guaicaipuro, while Guaid� was mostly Guaicaipuro, with a little bit of Tiuna, another indigenous chief. Maduro, however, was just �the axis of evil.� Dav�d explained that �the Cubans��Maduro�s rumored team of secret advisers�had practiced the �dark arts� of Santer�a to lead Maduro to evil.

�Venezuela is ordained to be the best country in the region, and after a world war, which is now unfolding, it will receive many people from all over the world,� he said. �In order to be ready, however, it must be liberated.� Guaid� would bring about that liberation, he claimed: �I met him in December, and I told him, �You are the Chosen One.� �

quote:

Dav�d interrupted to say that he had �read the cards� and that Trump was likely to win re�lection, but that it depended on Venezuela�s becoming free. He added that Trump had a �Karmic problem,� because he �didn�t know how to express himself,� but that he was successful despite his impediments. �He�s like Maxwell Smart,� Dav�d said�the bumbling spy in the sixties sitcom. �Everything he does is wrong but turns out well in the end.�

also this part with a colectivo is cool

quote:

Colectivo Alexis Vives was founded in El 23, with financial support from Ch�vez, as a community-support organization. It is situated in a former commercial block, next to a burned-out supermarket. A mural outside depicts the Last Supper, with Christ as a brown-skinned man with a bushy beard, surrounded by revolutionary apostles: Che Guevara, Fidel Castro, Mao, Lenin, Ch�vez.

It has been run for years by a diehard chavista named Roberto Longa. A burly, voluble man, Longa holds court in a kind of command center, with a panel of sixteen video screens that monitor security cameras around the estate. When I visited Longa during the blackout, he claimed, improbably, �The chavistas have never had a better moment than the present one.� His reasoning was quintessentially Marxist: �the contradictions are deepening� in Venezuelan society�part of a necessary process of broadening the revolution. �The contradictions need to deepen even more before a dialogue can take place between the government and the popular forces,� he said. There was no need to include Guaid� in such a dialogue, he stressed. �We�re confronting the Empire��the United States. �Guaid� is a symbol of the Empire, and he should be imprisoned and then tried for treason.�

Longa confided that he believes �the Empire� murdered Ch�vez, by injecting him with an aggressive strain of cancer. He showed me a photograph of Ch�vez during a visit to El 23. He said, �Our love is for Ch�vez, and we are never going to stop loving him for all of our lives.� In his view, Maduro was carrying on Ch�vez�s work, and his explanations for the real cause of the country�s woes were inarguable. The blackout had been brought about by American sabotage; the widespread poverty and hunger resulted from an �economic war� led by the U.S. �The gringos have said, �We�re going to asphyxiate you,� and we can see it happening,� he said. If the Americans forced Maduro from power, he vowed to take up arms. �We�ll radicalize the revolution,� he said. �We�ll initiate a prolonged popular war, an insurrection, and then move against the rancid oligarchy, and take over the oil industry, and so on.�

Later, Jefferson Gonz�lez, a young member of Longa�s colectivo, told me that most chavistas had closed ranks with Maduro: �People might have their complaints, but we wash our dirty laundry in private. One thing I can assure you is that, if there is a gringo invasion, the people will come out of the barrios to fight. Meanwhile, Maduro is the leader of the revolution, and he has told the gringos that they should get out of here. What we are all waiting for is for him to arrest Guaid�.� He wore a truculent look, and added, �We saw Guaid�s rear end�which he offered up to the gringos�before we ever saw his face. That�s why Mike Pence is always talking about Venezuela, because he�s the real leader. The opposition right now is the American government.�

If the unrest in Venezuela turned to open conflict, it was not clear that Guaid�s supporters would come to the streets and fight. On Saturdays, the regime and the opposition held rallies in Caracas, and the contrast was telling. The opposition�s events often had the ritual earnestness of a campus protest. The regime�s felt like a cross between a block party and an Army Reserve parade.

One weekend during my visit, police blocked off a main avenue downtown, and people dressed in red, the official chavista color, began arriving on buses, carrying pro-government signs. A few hundred men and women in militia uniforms had organized themselves into marching ranks. These milicianos, as they are called, make up an all-volunteer force that Maduro has heralded as the core of a people�s resistance army, which will help defend against a Yankee invasion. They are mostly untrained and inexperienced�one diplomat I spoke to derided them as �wheelchair shooters��but they are enthusiastic, and they have the regime�s support.

A d.j. had set up a booth and was blaring chavista salsa through loudspeakers. �Our comandante always goes onward with the revolution,� the lyrics of one song went, and people sang along, as some broke out of line to dance. The mood was festive, but the milicianos also provide evidence of Venezuela�s militarization. At a rally in April, Maduro announced proudly that their membership had grown to two million, and soon there would be a million more. �With your rifles on your shoulders, be ready to defend the fatherland and dig the furrow to plant the seeds to produce food for the community,� Maduro told them. He asked them to swear to fight �imperialist aggressions��even if it cost them their lives.

Most chavistas take it as self-evident that Guaid� is a Yankee stooge. In February, Maduro called him �a puppet, a Judas who has tried to help the American empire take control of our country politically and militarily.� The charge rankles Guaid�, but he cannot entirely refute it. As long as the U.S. backs him, he is protected�a kind of one-man no-fly zone.

I know that's a big block of text but the whole article is like 10x as long so that's brief in perspective

Fast Luck has issued a correction as of 17:48 on Jun 11, 2019

# ? Jun 11, 2019 17:46

Al!: Apr 2, 2010

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AEYN5w4T_aM

# ? Jun 11, 2019 17:49

30.5 Days: Nov 19, 2006

Maduro: Please forgive me, my vision was clouded by Cuba's evil magic.
Guaido: Betrayal can NEVER be forgiven.

# ? Jun 11, 2019 18:19

30.5 Days: Nov 19, 2006

*outside the venezuelan embassy*

Guaido: Black magic bars our way... but the will of a comprador is stronger!

# ? Jun 11, 2019 18:23

Truga: May 4, 2014; Lipstick Apathy

look, nicolas, could you help me out? stick the leg back on the doll okay?

# ? Jun 11, 2019 18:26

Pener Kropoopkin: Jan 30, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
(and can't post for 20 days!)

Using Santeria to run a Caribbean country is straight out of Shadowrun.

# ? Jun 11, 2019 18:48

Autism Sneaks: Nov 21, 2016

nobody would suspect the godless communists of getting their way using magic, pretty smart tbh

also lmao Dave the magician thinks Trump doesn't know how to express himself

# ? Jun 11, 2019 20:39

TerminalSaint: Apr 21, 2007; Where must we go...

we who wander this Wasteland in search of our better selves?

https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1139301939731148801

# ? Jun 14, 2019 04:05

01011001: Dec 26, 2012

Captain Billy Pissboy posted:

Is narrative what liberals call ideology now?

narrative is for movers and shakers, ideology is for rubes

# ? Jun 14, 2019 04:21

Clip-On Fedora: Feb 20, 2011

Ramrod Hotshot posted:

lol

https://twitter.com/EudaimoniaAstro/status/1135943285615222784

Truly he is the Julius Caesar of our times.

# ? Jun 14, 2019 04:29

got any sevens: Feb 9, 2013; by Cyrano4747

Clip-On Fedora posted:

Truly he is the Julius Caesar of our times.

or tony blair

# ? Jun 14, 2019 04:55

R. Guyovich: Dec 25, 1991

Clip-On Fedora posted:

Truly he is the Julius Caesar of our times.

nicholas ii

# ? Jun 14, 2019 09:48

Fat-Lip-Sum-41.mp3: Nov 15, 2003

tulsi gabbard

# ? Jun 14, 2019 12:19

frankenfreak: Feb 16, 2007; I SCORED 85% ON A QUIZ ABOUT MONDAY NIGHT RAW AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY TEXT

#bastionboogerbrigade

Wallenstein, but infinitely worse at raising armies

# ? Jun 14, 2019 14:03

Al!: Apr 2, 2010

niles crane

# ? Jun 14, 2019 15:12

Mr. Fish: Sep 13, 2017; INLAND EMPIRE — This is a team with a lot of past, but little present. And almost no future.

Dave stands over Maduro at the end of the coup, cradling his dying form in his arms

"I should have been the one to fill your dark soul with LIIIIGHT"

# ? Jun 14, 2019 15:41

Chokes McGee: Aug 7, 2008; This is Urotsuki.

i've heard of venezula op

# ? Jun 14, 2019 18:35

Peanut President: Nov 5, 2008; by Athanatos

Chokes McGee posted:

i've heard of venezula op

wrong thread idiot, this is for Vneezuela

# ? Jun 14, 2019 20:20

i say swears online: Mar 4, 2005

nancy reagan

Al! posted:

niles crane

lol

# ? Jun 14, 2019 20:31

Salean: Mar 17, 2004; Homewrecker

can i pass the hat for a leftist invasion of venezuula i think thats what we gotta do

# ? Jun 14, 2019 20:34

THS: Sep 15, 2017

guaido is a socialist

# ? Jun 14, 2019 21:46

Chokes McGee: Aug 7, 2008; This is Urotsuki.

Peanut President posted:

wrong thread idiot, this is for Vneezuela

oh okay

bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

# ? Jun 14, 2019 22:04

breadshaped: Apr 1, 2010; Soiled Meat

THS posted:

guaido is a corporate socialist

# ? Jun 14, 2019 22:28

Epic High Five: Jun 5, 2004

THS posted:

guaido is a socialist

in the sense that corporations, and only corporations, are people, yes

# ? Jun 14, 2019 22:34

frankenfreak: Feb 16, 2007; I SCORED 85% ON A QUIZ ABOUT MONDAY NIGHT RAW AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY TEXT

#bastionboogerbrigade

Peanut President posted:

wrong thread idiot, this is for Vneezuela

Does vnee rhyme with twee? :thunk:

# ? Jun 15, 2019 00:19

Fiend: Dec 2, 2001

Oh

My

God

Read

The

OP

# ? Jun 15, 2019 01:41

Percelus: Sep 9, 2012; My command, your wish is

sometimes hands off means bloods on your hands

# ? Jun 15, 2019 02:08

Ytlaya: Nov 13, 2005

Clip-On Fedora posted:

Truly he is the Julius Caesar of our times.

While I've seen some of the liberals commenting on this distance themselves from supporting Guaido specifically, you'd think they'd take a step back and think "maybe the people who have been enthusiastically supporting this guy who is obviously both awful and dumb as hell are not reliable sources." But apparently learning anything from past events is the height of cynicism, and the only way to engage in "good faith" is to blindly trust that everyone treated positively by the media and US government is good until the proof otherwise becomes completely impossible to ignore.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 02:48

CharlestheHammer: Jun 26, 2011; YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!

well I mean it depends on how liberals react to this Iran thing.

I haven�t looked but if they buy into this there is no hope for them.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 02:50

comedyblissoption: Mar 15, 2006

CharlestheHammer posted:

well I mean it depends on how liberals react to this Iran thing.

I haven�t looked but if they buy into this there is no hope for them.

maybe this time liberals wont want to bomb brown people i say for the 1488th time

# ? Jun 15, 2019 03:23

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# ? Jun 8, 2024 23:46

Ytlaya: Nov 13, 2005

CharlestheHammer posted:

well I mean it depends on how liberals react to this Iran thing.

I haven�t looked but if they buy into this there is no hope for them.

My first response is "they won't believe it because it's Trump telling them it instead of a liberal president" but they were totally down with believing the likes of John Bolton and Elliot Abrahms, so, uh.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 03:34

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [Latin America] Lulag Archipelago

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