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KYOON GRIFFEY JR posted:it would have required much less discipline to meet our goals without it Alright now for the points I said I'd get to. Yes, you're correct. I don't like having to be too disciplined. Which would be relatively OK if I were maxing an IRA and 401k for 10 years now before I ever saw my paycheck and spent $500 a month on fun stuff. But I was irresponsible with interest bearing loans. But I posted the numbers as asked for days, and got one snarky reply and a huge derail. So does the budget look good or what? Sticking with it I'll need to deal with on my end, but having input on it would be appreciated (anything glaring I'm missing, etc) Dwight Eisenhower posted:You cut $320/mo that's doing very little for you and are spending an additional $1490/mo for something that will do substantially more for you. Yes, your recurring cash flow month over month will include net $1170 higher expenditures. You seem to have your head on your shoulders (and read/comprehend the thread, thank you) and as tempting as it is to  the gently caress out of this, I've tried that and failed at it. I can do that for a few months for sure, like I did in the last thread, but it's non-sustainable and this isn't a few months type of problem. I constantly talk outside of the internet about insanity being trying the same thing the same way and expecting different results, and I know everyone is like 'oh you're spending money sure jumped on that quick', but this was something that started pre-thread.So I'm considering your input is what I'm saying. My Rhythmic Crotch posted:For July-August I would like to see you get into a residence without using a bunch of credit for all the random expenses that get incurred. Alright, well now I have a good idea of what is expected of me. It stresses me out when everyone is jumping down my throat (even if it's deserved). Realistic budgeting is something I have struggled with making - I try to optimize every category to get out of debt or save a little quicker, fail, say gently caress it and fail harder. That's absolutely a pattern. n8r posted:I have no idea how Tuyop is calculating his net worth. I would suggest that you add $100k of debt to your calculations - this is the amount of money AT MINIMUM you should have in retirement accounts right now. Carefully read Z's thread re: retirement, it should scare the gently caress out of you that you are so far behind. How much money would you need to start stuffing away right now to have ~$200k in your retirement accounts at 40? You need to factor this into your budget. Yeah I'm fine with the calculation of $100k. We're so buried at this moment what's another six figures anyway. Yeah like KyGJr said I agree that doing something small like unsubscribing makes feel like I'm doing something. Conversely I was advised to do that and was just reporting back. SlyFrog posted:Don't ask me. A successful thread a year from now to me would have been you having stayed in your RV, paid it and your truck off, then selling the RV and then getting that apartment and having a positive net worth from the RV sale (even if it was a relatively small amount from the sale). I'm honestly so lost on this loving apartment. Half of BFC is saying yes you're being too risky otherwise, the other half is saying you're an impulsive idiot what are you doing. That tells me neither choice is definitely incorrect. It's the 4th tomorrow, it's a holiday, I'm going to have some (free) fun and think about it with my wife. Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 05:47 on Jul 4, 2019 |
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Jul 4, 2019 03:42
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I vote that you get an apartment because your child is living in a backyard with no running water and no fixed address. Your family is literally homeless. Like, if you were one of my welfare clients, I would refer you to the homeless services unit because you qualify, you are actually legally homeless.
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Jul 4, 2019 04:05
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Knyteguy posted:I'm honestly so lost on this loving apartment. Half of BFC is saying yes you're being too risky otherwise, the other half is saying you're an impulsive idiot what are you doing. That tells me neither choice is definitely incorrect. I think you should get an apartment as well but I will attempt to explain the things you are not understanding because I'm an idiot who thinks people change after they are 30. Your biggest problem is that you make stupid decisions. You seem very defensive when people point this out and ask you to evaluate your past decisions. But, no matter how many zuarg-like spreadsheets and budgets you make, you are never going to succeed if you don't fix your broken decision making. Many of your bad decisions involve impulsively spending large amounts of money without really taking the time to think it through, and I believe just one person linked you getting an apartment to that same kind of hasty, possibly not well thought out decision making process. For example, you haven't looked for a new job or posted a resume, but you rushed right out to spend money on an apartment It's like part of your gambling and addiction problem, the actual spending of money makes you feel good so you take advantage of anything you can use as an excuse to do it. It's impossible for us to know just how much reasoned thought you and your family gave the idea, it just seemed to happen really fast. Another person pointed out that you should look for a job because you might want to not live in Reno. That's a fair point you might want to consider, have you talked about that as a couple? That seems like a conversation that should happen before you sign a new lease. You implied that you would be open to moving across the country and getting a second apartment, but that seems like another one of your dumb plans that is completely avoidable by doing things better right now. Either commit to living in Reno for a year and start planning the next 12 months and a possible move next summer, or don't take the apartment and immediately start a nationwide job search.
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Jul 4, 2019 05:52
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Look, the apartment may not the 100% optimal financial option in the circumstances, but you’re not in your position because you don’t have enough money and need to penny pinch on every single factor. You’re in your position because like the kindergarten kids that Arnie taught, you lack discipline. Getting the apartment may cost a bit more, but maybe that’s not bad if it forces you to exhibit more financial discipline and teaches those healthy habits. The alternative of remaining in the RV somewhat masks you having to learn that. That’s my take. There’s arguments for each option and I could side with either pretty comfortably. But I think you need to consider the underlying attitudes you’re trying to (un)learn as much as the actual financial situation.
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Jul 4, 2019 06:51
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Bobbie Wickham posted:I vote that you get an apartment because your child is living in a backyard with no running water and no fixed address. Your family is literally homeless. Like, if you were one of my welfare clients, I would refer you to the homeless services unit because you qualify, you are actually legally homeless. Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Knyteguy's BFC Thread - McKinney-Vento in Practice
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Jul 4, 2019 08:04
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Knyteguy posted:Let me ask you guys this for some perspective. What would a successful month look like to you? What would a successful thread look like to you this time around? 1. Work out your priorities and get them in a realistic order. Buying a house, for example, is not going to be a realistic priority. An example of what realistic priorities might look like: - stabilize your living situation - get rid of all consumer debt - build emergency fund - max out retirement contributions - save a deposit for the house 2. Come up with a concrete plan that tackles those priorities one by one, in order of importance. Stabilizing your living situation might mean getting an apartment, or committing to the illegal living situation, or getting a new job. You need to work out which one based on probability and your values. 3. Worry less about the miniscule categories of your budget and focus more on impulse control. Make it a rule that you need to sleep on all purchases for a week before you make it. This will really force you to practice conscious spending and impulse control. 4. Successful thread when you get to the end of your priority list and have to make a new one. On the living situation thing, I think you could justify either course of action. There are different risks either way; pick the one that's going to make significant positive behavioral change easier. For what it's worth I would get the apartment. Living in an RV on the road is a big adventure; living in an RV in someone else's backyard is stressful. Even (and sometimes especially) if it's family. You'll need to make some big behavioral changes and it's easier to do that if you're under less stress.
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Jul 4, 2019 08:40
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Thanks for the input. I agree we need to come up with a concrete plan. On my phone so hard to share thoughts more. Knyteguy BFC Thread Redux - ANUSTART ? Happy 4th!
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Jul 4, 2019 16:01
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Knyteguy posted:Yeah and a guy with $4,000/mo in debt but makes $10,000/mo in income can't get approved for a house when a guy with $100/mo in debt but makes $1,000/mo can. The guy with $4,000 in debt still has $6,000 every month and the guy with $100/mo in debt has $900/mo, but sure the guy with $4,000/mo in debt is definitely worse off. My dude, please stop with this stuff. Take some ownership. Few things: - Why is internet $300? - What is the $30 business expense? - What's up with the $225 RV maintenance? (I know these things break all the time, my parents have one) - Am I blind or is there not any credit card payments listed here? - I would probably lump vaping, "stuff forgot to budget", discretionary, alcohol, etc into one big ole category. The point being you should really understand, and be comfortable with, exactly how much money you're spending on stuff that isn't going to help your financial situation.
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Jul 4, 2019 16:17
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My Rhythmic Crotch posted:My dude, please stop with this stuff. Take some ownership. Yeh my bad. Should have stopped posting yesterday earlier. Got in a bad mood. - Internet is cable tv, internet, cell bill. Cable TV = for my mom for letting us stay here, internet is day care expense, cell is cell for my wife (I’m moving to google voice). Will prob move cell phone companies to something cheaper in the next few months when my wife’s phone is paid off. - Cloud storage/unlimited google drive, and Dropbox. I’m in the process of moving Dropbox to google drive. Google drive will be used for my movies and important stuff. Kind of an extension of my home lab (I run a Plex/htpc/rom&emulator server in my rv believe it or not). It came with a domain so I just tucked it under business. - RV maintenance is a once a year thing. Check the seals, repack wheel bearings, propane pressure test (check for leaks), replace fire alarm batteries, ton more stuff. We had that scheduled and already did that. Keeps our warranty valid for a lot of stuff. Should be good on RV maintenance until next year unless we’re selling. - We paid off our credit cards. - I’ll consider that. Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 16:43 on Jul 4, 2019 |
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Jul 4, 2019 16:29
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Knyteguy posted:Yeh my bad. Should have stopped posting yesterday earlier. Got in a bad mood. - For the internet line, it might make sense to break that out into cell, internet, and childcare so there's less confusion and questions about it. - For the $30 cloud/whatever, I would probably also put that into discretionary, if I'm understanding what that's all about. - For the RV maintenance, I would look back over the time you've had it to come up with a monthly maintenance amount. Even though you're not on the road, it'll be good to understand and plan for that expense.
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Jul 4, 2019 16:44
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Is he paying $30 a month to host his video games
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Jul 4, 2019 16:49
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Harry Potter on Ice posted:Is he paying $30 a month to host his video games Movies, business documents (I ran an LLC for two years), pictures, job offers, tax documents, client project source code, personal source code projects, etc. There’s a variety of reasons it was under business. Mostly movies though. I hardly have time for video games anymore. Also $24/mo. $30 includes Dropbox which I don’t need any longer, but I have switched over yet.
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Jul 4, 2019 16:55
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My Rhythmic Crotch posted:- For the internet line, it might make sense to break that out into cell, internet, and childcare so there's less confusion and questions about it. Sounds good.
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Jul 4, 2019 17:01
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July Rough Draft 2 Note that normally I will not be making budget changes like this in a month. Also just to make it clear I'm tracking the budget on YNAB, but I think it's easier to communicate a month's plan like this on a spreadsheet. My wife finally got her first 2 week paycheck, so this is a closer look at a plan for July for the move-in. No pre-tax deductions this month (starting in August). A lot of stuff is higher this month due to the move in (we need vaccine records), and my dog needs her yearly blood draw for hypothyroidism. Avg. spending for pets is $89/mo. I generally budget $100. Changes: - Added clothes. My kid is growing fast so he's in need of some stuff. Going to check out thrift store stuff for him. Wife needs a second pair of work shoes, same thrift store. - Moved a lot of stuff to discretionary. - Birthdays -> Birthdays/Holidays - Broke 'internet' into further categories to better reflect their purpose. - Upped emergency fund 98 -> 388. Notes: Furniture is going to be less expensive than predicted. We did initial research on Amazon, but Big Lots for example has a twin frame for $40 instead of $100 (replaces box spring). I'm not touching the budget for it though; we'll roll over any extra into the emergency fund after we're done. BFC thinks my decision making sucks, I now believe my decision making sucks, so I'm going to spend time working on that. If we move into the apartment, which I believe we will (again my wife and I agreed to think on it more today), then we'll be using that opportunity as a new start. In my experience big changes that disrupt routines can provide opportunity for change. We will start out with daily healthy meal planning, saying no to activities if we can't afford them, eating at restaurants no more than once a week if the budget allows, and taking a walk/bike to the river (weekends) or around the big park across the street (every day). Our bike rack on the RV got hit and run in a small town in Louisiana and got brand new bikes from the insurance company for them, so we'd like to start putting them to good use. Also someone said we need to take our emotions out of our financial decisions. I agree completely. I have been working on this, and found this article/website helpful to that end, which I found last week or so: http://unfuckyourfinances.com/start-here/. Finally, I'm finding this out during typing this, my wife's work offers a benefit of a (free??) financial advisor service. We'll definitely take advantage of that if that's correct. Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 17:36 on Jul 4, 2019 |
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Jul 4, 2019 17:34
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Leng posted:2. Come up with a concrete plan that tackles those priorities one by one, in order of importance. Stabilizing your living situation might mean getting an apartment, or committing to the illegal living situation, or getting a new job. You need to work out which one based on probability and your values. Bobbie Wickham posted:I vote that you get an apartment because your child is living in a backyard with no running water and no fixed address. Your family is literally homeless. Like, if you were one of my welfare clients, I would refer you to the homeless services unit because you qualify, you are actually legally homeless. I'm not just hand-wringing and pleading for someone to Please Think of the Children, but Mary, Mother of God, THINK OF THE CHILD
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Jul 4, 2019 20:00
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Bobbie Wickham posted:I'm not just hand-wringing and pleading for someone to Please Think of the Children, but Mary, Mother of God, THINK OF THE CHILD I know. That's why I said if I were him, I'd get the apartment. But that's based on my values and priorities and I'm just a random internet stranger. Knyteguy posted:I run a Plex/htpc/rom&emulator server in my rv believe it or not). It came with a domain so I just tucked it under business. I... What? I also run a Plex home server and it does not come with a monthly recurring cost other than electricity. My Rhythmic Crotch posted:- I would probably lump vaping, "stuff forgot to budget", discretionary, alcohol, etc into one big ole category. The point being you should really understand, and be comfortable with, exactly how much money you're spending on stuff that isn't going to help your financial situation. This is a very good thing to do. Your budget should be set up so that you can tell at a glance what is non-discretionary vs discretionary. Each of these might have both fixed components (eg rent is a fixed non-discretionary, your cloud subscriptions are fixed discretionary) vs variable component (eg groceries is a variable non-discretionary while alcohol is a variable discretionary). Contributions to savings, debt repayment (including extra credit repayments) should be treated as fixed non-discretionary. That is, you pay them first and you never touch money that's earmarked for those purposes and especially not in favor of something that's discretionary. That means your priority of conscious spending becomes: 1. Fixed non-discretionary 2. Variable non-discretionary 3. All other discretionary - what you then spend here depends on you, because at the end of the day, everything in here is not a necessity
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Jul 4, 2019 21:58
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I want to be clear - you should not live in the RV for the long term. Not paying rent for this apartment for a year or less literally allows you to get out from under this RV. Like the rent for one year pays off the RV. To me, it is your actual way out in a year. Paying the rent literally moves you in the opposite direction. You are taking money from paying off the RV and getting out from under it in a year and handing it to a landlord (on top of the additional amounts you'll pay for furniture, move costs, utilities, etc.). The RV is not a long term plan. It is a short term plan so that you can actually get a long term plan, instead of being stuck in lovely apartment hell with an added monthly burden, with reduced mobility if you actually find a higher paying job somewhere else. It would also be different to me if you hadn't already been there for a while. It's not a new shock at this point. To be blunt, your family is used to it. One more year or less is really not all that material. To the extent there is damage, it has already been done. I also think the thread is over-exagerating the Grapes of Wrath like squalor and poverty you are in while living in the RV. It's not fun, but nothing you have written sounds insurmountable or horrific. If the worst thing your child has to face in life is going inside the nearby house to use the bathroom, he'll be okay. But in the end, while I don't think the apartment is the right choice, I agree that it could be done - the bigger issue is are you going to save even more of the income you have left after paying $20,000 a year in rent that you are not paying not to get out of your hole?
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Jul 4, 2019 22:08
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SlyFrog posted:I also think the thread is over-exagerating the Grapes of Wrath like squalor and poverty you are in while living in the RV. It's not fun, but nothing you have written sounds insurmountable or horrific. If the worst thing your child has to face in life is going inside the nearby house to use the bathroom, he'll be okay. People aren't worried about the RV so much as Knyteguy's hosed up family dynamic. His alcoholic mom called the cops on them a year ago, and it sounds like that's just one of many things that have happened. That can really mess a kid up if they're in a dysfunctional or stressful environment in childhood. Research is showing that it leads to all sorts of issues well into adulthood.
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Jul 4, 2019 22:22
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Inept posted:People aren't worried about the RV so much as Knyteguy's hosed up family dynamic. His alcoholic mom called the cops on them a year ago, and it sounds like that's just one of many things that have happened. That can really mess a kid up if they're in a dysfunctional or stressful environment in childhood. Research is showing that it leads to all sorts of issues well into adulthood. I can understand that, but I think we need to know a lot more about the environment before we can say either way based on that.
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Jul 4, 2019 22:27
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Knyteguy posted:July Rough Draft 2 Free living in luxurious RV = 756 + 375 + 225 + 165 + 160 + 110 = 1791
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Jul 4, 2019 23:13
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SlyFrog posted:I can understand that, but I think we need to know a lot more about the environment before we can say either way based on that. Besides the family dynamics mentioned above, the fact that KG cannot even wash his hands in his home, is pretty much living in squalor. There is literally nothing stable or functional about this living situation except as an extremely short-term stop-gap measure. I get what you're saying, but what I'm saying is, you guys have an extreme and rather narrow view of what constitutes Bad. This is not healthy, this is another example of how skewed KG's perspective is on things like a stable home. He's loving squatting on his mom's backyard with no running water and a goddamn kid. If it was just KG and his wife, I'd say do whatever, but things change when there's a kid involved. Getting his debt paid down is important, but not as important as being able to bathe your child in your own home. He and his wife hosed this up big time, and now he has two challenges: his finances and being a responsible parent. Providing the basics for his child, in a home that can't be carted away by a couple teenagers with a pickup truck, means takes precedence over percentage points on bank accounts or whatever the gently caress. i know this is BFC, but come on.
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Jul 4, 2019 23:20
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We're like 98% yes on getting the apartment, or I probably would have updated the budget. It's not financially optimal, but I'm not even sure we want to buy a house in Reno right now so it gives us 13 months to evaluate living back home without yeah my son thinking living in a backyard is normal. My son is measurably happier around family though, otherwise we'd be living in an apartment in Dallas (Prosper, Frisco or McKinney)/Austin/Seattle which was our plan with the end of the RV trip. Also the family dynamic has been great here, my sister has a child development bachelor's degree and will be joining CPS/social work soon, and we wouldn't have come back/would have left again if poo poo was going south like we did last time. Seriously my son is happy, healthy, up to date on vaccines, scheduled for his annual pediatrician exam, eats a well-balanced diet, is read to every single night, absolutely adores my sister, his grandma, and his cousin, and is the light of our lives. To use the words of bitch-boy Aaron Rodgers R-E-L-A-X gently caress the packers. Apartment is basically a go, thank you for your input and concern for my son; I respect the fact that you're probably a good person for the concern. Gonna assume that's enough said on that. Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 01:01 on Jul 5, 2019 |
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Jul 5, 2019 00:29
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Leng posted:I... What? I also run a Plex home server and it does not come with a monthly recurring cost other than electricity. https://github.com/dweidenfeld/plexdrive Today is a fun day so I'll get to more serious points tomorrow.
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Jul 5, 2019 00:39
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Oh yea you definitely could get an apt in seattle. Most definitely
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Jul 5, 2019 00:39
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Harry Potter on Ice posted:Oh yea you definitely could get an apt in seattle. Most definitely Yeah, the market for experienced software developers in Seattle is pretty bad I've heard.
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Jul 5, 2019 00:42
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I am shocked that kg has opted to spend money to put himself into a worse financial position. This is the first time it's ever happened. You could move into an RV park... Those are what $300/month? Do that. n8r fucked around with this message at 02:05 on Jul 5, 2019 |
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Jul 5, 2019 02:01
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n8r posted:I am shocked that kg has opted to spend money to put himself into a worse financial position. This is the first time it's ever happened. We're not hooked up to water because sewer is a problem. Really the biggest problem. RV parks don't have long term options here in Reno (and loving only this city wtf we've traveled everywhere and this is the first place we can't find a drat long term RV park). First thing we tried.
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Jul 5, 2019 02:08
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n8r posted:I am shocked that kg has opted to spend money to put himself into a worse financial position. This is the first time it's ever happened. A stable home is worth the financial setback.
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Jul 5, 2019 03:17
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Knyteguy posted:We're not hooked up to water because sewer is a problem. Really the biggest problem. Third result on google: http://www.renorvpark.com/Rates.html $500/month. Lots of other places mention long term rates.
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Jul 5, 2019 04:32
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n8r posted:Third result on google: October-March only. Called em. Also: https://mynews4.com/news/local/rv-living-a-way-to-avoid-expensive-tight-housing-market 750/mo now, must have perfect rental history (we don't). poo poo's out of control. Legit I would if I could n8r. It was our very first option.
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Jul 5, 2019 04:43
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Knyteguy posted:750/mo now, must have perfect rental history (we don't). poo poo's out of control. Legit I would if I could n8r. It was our very first option. How the gently caress do you damage a literal block of dirt with a power point and some hose plugs?
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Jul 5, 2019 04:58
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Nam Taf posted:You don’t have perfect rental history
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Jul 5, 2019 05:47
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SiGmA_X posted:FTFY. I had to pay $80 on a rental because I sat at the kitchen table with my PC (goon nerd alert) for 6 months and the table rubbed against the wall and rubbed away the paint. That was the cost of getting that area repainted. I get causing damage to a property that compromises the bond. But wtf for an RV hookup
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Jul 5, 2019 10:45
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Knyteguy posted:Gonna assume that's enough said on that. As far as I can tell you are a blabbermouth whose response to being told anything is to dribble on about it until the other person losses interest. Is this why you're paid half the salary expected for your field? You're insufferable. You easily have the resources to solve your situation, stop being such a loving rear end in a top hat.
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Jul 5, 2019 13:03
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Knyteguy posted:You seem to have your head on your shoulders (and read/comprehend the thread, thank you) and as tempting as it is to I'll briefly suppress the urge to abuse you, in pursuit of useful communication: I can read this response in one of two ways. - Hey, yeah, I do sometimes make bad financial decisions when stressed, and my illegal RV situation may end up causing me a lot of stress, so spending money to avoid that pit-fall is maybe a good idea. - Sticking to an aggressive budget will stress me out so much that I lose self control and end up making bad financial decisions from being stressed, but I can try it. I think it's the former. Which do you mean? Also regardless if it's the latter, nothing in my "success criteria" said your budget was aggressive. Just that you made a budget, and you followed that budget. Your self control is really not the place for you to lean on right now. I think it'd be best for you to build the habit of following a budget first, and then work on making that budget one that achieves your long term plans. That's not to say do only one, or only the other. It's just advice on how to prioritize.
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Jul 5, 2019 15:01
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Where is the $700-$1k budget line for retirement funding. Your budget is poo poo without it.
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Jul 5, 2019 15:20
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Dwight Eisenhower posted:I'll briefly suppress the urge to abuse you, in pursuit of useful communication: I can read this response in one of two ways. 1/the former. This month's budget isn't hyper-aggressive. One of the reasons I set groceries to $500, furniture to $650 and whatnot. It gives a little breathing room. We're getting the apartment. $399 due today in a deposit. Move in as previously mentioned is 8/1. It opens up the RV to be sold as soon as it's no longer underwater, so that's why it won't set us back too much on getting out of debt.
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Jul 5, 2019 18:30
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Buy your furniture from thrift stores and Craig's List before you buy new.
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Jul 5, 2019 18:51
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Bobbie Wickham posted:Buy your furniture from thrift stores and Craig's List before you buy new. Definitely. The one thing we'll probably buy new no matter what is my son's mattress; other than that we're no strangers to thrift store couches and whatnot.
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Jul 5, 2019 18:55
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Nam Taf posted:I had to pay $80 on a rental because I sat at the kitchen table with my PC (goon nerd alert) for 6 months and the table rubbed against the wall and rubbed away the paint. That was the cost of getting that area repainted. Knyteguy posted:1/the former. This month's budget isn't hyper-aggressive. One of the reasons I set groceries to $500, furniture to $650 and whatnot. It gives a little breathing room.
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Jul 5, 2019 21:04
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