/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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sweet thursday: Sep 16, 2012

I didnt have enough toilet paper and it got everywhere

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:02

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# ? Jun 3, 2024 17:55

SilvergunSuperman: Aug 7, 2010

That replicas one sounds like a sitcom episode, those people are loving insane.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:05

MasBrillante: Dec 3, 2005; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for not being interested in having sex with my new spouse?

I got married recently. It's not going great for a... variety of reasons. We were waiting for marriage to have sex, which hasn't happened yet. I wasn't the reason for this, spouse is just very Catholic and didn't want to risk pregnancy. We are both virgins though.

The wedding didn't go well to say the least. During the reception, it came out that my parents were getting divorced, and my father had knocked up his mistress. Much was made of him finally "having a child" (I'm adopted). This went over horribly as you can imagine.

My father also had his mistress crash the reception. This was obviously a huge scene, and all anyone talked about. I spent the entire reception downing shots and shoveling food in in between talking my mother down and fielding gossip. I'm not an attention seeker, but not one person said congratulations and my husband and I did not speak the entire night. My father and his girlfriend were eventually asked to leave, but my mother had to be locked in a hotel room to avoid a fight.

My biological grandmother was complaining of chest pains so I had to drunkenly uber her to the hospital. My new husband ended up passing out, so he was no help in any way. I came back and ubered my now too tired to do anything mother back to her house. I spent a few hours drinking with some bridesmaids raging about my emotions and then passed out in a bathtub.

The next day, I was FURIOUS. I ended up ghosting with two of my bridesmaids to a different state for the next two days before going on a planned business trip. In between these things, I had to take my mother to the psych ward, which my new husband was again no help with.

I'm currently still in a different state on that trip, and I'm still furious. My new husband is mad at me because we're not currently speaking much but I'm in no mood to speak to much of anyone. It's hard for me to accept calls or texts from anyone in my social circle right now. While I feel bad that almost three weeks on the marriage isn't consummated, I'm not the one who insisted on waiting for marriage, and I'm certainly not in any mood right now. I'm going back to home state tomorrow, and I'm in a mood to have my own bedroom when I get there. I could stay in this state indefinitely if I really wanted, but I'd have to get the rest of my things and it's a high COL area.

I've gotten no apology, and my spouse thinks that my anger is due to not having sex on the wedding night. I couldn't care LESS about that. I had too much going on anyway. I just wanted some support, and I haven't gotten any. I'm not particularly interested in going on a honeymoon with someone who essentially only wants me for sex. At least work and my friends value me as a person and not just for the chance that I'll spread my legs for them. I don't want sex right now, but I don't want to be divorced after a month either.

It kind of feels like HER family ruined HIS wedding night and she hasn�t so much as paused to reflect on how he might feel about it or how they might support each other. She just lumps him in with their �social circle.� I predict they will be married for twenty years and three children.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:06

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

MasBrillante posted:

It kind of feels like HER family ruined HIS wedding night and she hasn�t so much as paused to reflect on how he might feel about it or how they might support each other. She just lumps him in with their �social circle.� I predict they will be married for twenty years and three children.

hahaha

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:06

FilthyImp: Sep 30, 2002; Anime Deviant

Yeah surprisingly two people waiting u til after marriage to gently caress have TERRIBLE communication skills.

They just need an ugly fight where they vent the frustrations and then gently caress like the animals they are.

They also need to send gently caress You grams to all the people happy that Daddums is finally procreating.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:08

MasBrillante: Dec 3, 2005; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

I�m not Catholic; is this just an elaborate catholic courting ritual?

Also, my eyes glazed over while reading about the bride�s horrible family before I got to the one sentence about her husband drunkenly passing out. I�ve revised my estimate. 30 years of marriage.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:10

Antivehicular: Dec 30, 2011; I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

tbh, if I had to deal with Full Family Detonation on my wedding night and my new husband was convinced I was just upset because he didn't get a chance to dick me down, I would probably also be peeved about it

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:13

wedgie deliverer: Oct 2, 2010

Those people can't divorced soon enough.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:19

QuarkJets: Sep 8, 2008

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for suggesting that my sister chose an easy love?

What the gently caress?

I think this one might just be sour grapes, OP is upset that her sister basically stumbled into a good relationship and feels like good things shouldn't ever come easily.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:20

MasBrillante: Dec 3, 2005; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

QuarkJets posted:

What the gently caress?

I think this one might just be sour grapes, OP is upset that her sister basically stumbled into a good relationship and feels like good things shouldn't ever come easily.

It�s Indian parents. She�s jealous of the waves of approval her sister is getting for marrying the right type of guy. She can�t see past what happened when she picked the wrong one. They probably still haven�t forgiven her for it. She has to learn the hard lesson of holding her parents accountable for their behavior instead of projecting onto her sister, or she will end up exactly the same.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:22

Khizan: Jul 30, 2013

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for not being interested in having sex with my new spouse?

Pleasantly surprised to see that all the comments on this one are some variation of "You're the rear end in a top hat because you ghosted him and refused to communicate and then got pissed off because he didn't read your mind" or "Everybody's an rear end in a top hat. He shouldn't have drank that much and you should loving communicate with him". Really did not expect that from them.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:24

Tiny Timbs: Sep 6, 2008

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for not being interested in having sex with my new spouse?

I got married recently. It's not going great for a... variety of reasons. We were waiting for marriage to have sex, which hasn't happened yet. I wasn't the reason for this, spouse is just very Catholic and didn't want to risk pregnancy. We are both virgins though.

The wedding didn't go well to say the least. During the reception, it came out that my parents were getting divorced, and my father had knocked up his mistress. Much was made of him finally "having a child" (I'm adopted). This went over horribly as you can imagine.

My father also had his mistress crash the reception. This was obviously a huge scene, and all anyone talked about. I spent the entire reception downing shots and shoveling food in in between talking my mother down and fielding gossip. I'm not an attention seeker, but not one person said congratulations and my husband and I did not speak the entire night. My father and his girlfriend were eventually asked to leave, but my mother had to be locked in a hotel room to avoid a fight.

My biological grandmother was complaining of chest pains so I had to drunkenly uber her to the hospital. My new husband ended up passing out, so he was no help in any way. I came back and ubered my now too tired to do anything mother back to her house. I spent a few hours drinking with some bridesmaids raging about my emotions and then passed out in a bathtub.

The next day, I was FURIOUS. I ended up ghosting with two of my bridesmaids to a different state for the next two days before going on a planned business trip. In between these things, I had to take my mother to the psych ward, which my new husband was again no help with.

I'm currently still in a different state on that trip, and I'm still furious. My new husband is mad at me because we're not currently speaking much but I'm in no mood to speak to much of anyone. It's hard for me to accept calls or texts from anyone in my social circle right now. While I feel bad that almost three weeks on the marriage isn't consummated, I'm not the one who insisted on waiting for marriage, and I'm certainly not in any mood right now. I'm going back to home state tomorrow, and I'm in a mood to have my own bedroom when I get there. I could stay in this state indefinitely if I really wanted, but I'd have to get the rest of my things and it's a high COL area.

I've gotten no apology, and my spouse thinks that my anger is due to not having sex on the wedding night. I couldn't care LESS about that. I had too much going on anyway. I just wanted some support, and I haven't gotten any. I'm not particularly interested in going on a honeymoon with someone who essentially only wants me for sex. At least work and my friends value me as a person and not just for the chance that I'll spread my legs for them. I don't want sex right now, but I don't want to be divorced after a month either.

The comments are shredding this woman and she�s just utterly oblivious. Poor guy needs to run away from this situation yesterday.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:32

MasBrillante: Dec 3, 2005; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

wedding lady posted:

It�s being too drunk to help, not drinking at all. I had upwards of 14 drinks that night but miraculous was able to do, well, everything that needed to be done, no help from ANYONE.

a person posted:

YTA. Your family hosed up your wedding. Blame your family. Your husband didn�t know that your family would gently caress up the wedding and that your grandmother would need to go to the hospital, which also wasn�t his fault. You�ve ghosted this guy for 3 weeks and now you�re saying �I don�t want to be with someone who essentially only wants me for sex.� You don�t think he�s mad at you for, oh, I don�t know, GHOSTING HIM FOR THREE WEEKS? Sounds like the apple doesn�t fall too fall from the tree when it comes to you and your family.

wedding lady posted:

I've spoken some since going on my business trip, but I've been very busy with that and am still very furious.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:33

MasBrillante: Dec 3, 2005; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

wedding lady posted:

I'm less considered his daughter and more as a ward. Adoption is viewed weirdly in that culture. I use the word parents for social ease. I 100% get it though. I don't plan on offering more than an "inside" way out for when she needs to do a midnight run with a baby on her back.

This is also v normal.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:37

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

I honestly can't blame the guy for drinking himself into a stupor upon finding out what he married into and also probably realizing his new wife has a serious alcohol problem. 14 drinks and still able to function means she most likely has a problem.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:39

Pinecone Sample: Oct 12, 2010; THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420

Having never met this couple and also having met hundreds of them, I'm going to guess the husband's Catholic faith has worked up sex to be the be-all-end-all in his mind and he decided that it would have been the one truly great moment to save an all-around miserable event and assumed she would agree, while her Catholic faith had conveniently aligned with her extreme lack of interest in having sex with a person of the opposite sex until now when she has to confront that issue and is taking it out on him among other things.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:43

Antivehicular: Dec 30, 2011; I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

Okay, never mind, I missed the part where she never told the new husband anything that was happening, so she had like 14 drinks and vanished? What the gently caress, lady.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:45

Power Khan: Aug 20, 2011; by Fritz the Horse

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for not being interested in having sex with my new spouse?

Not really enough drunken brawling & driving for an eastern european family, so american irish heritage?

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:48

MasBrillante: Dec 3, 2005; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Power Khan posted:

Not really enough drunken brawling & driving for an eastern european family, so american irish heritage?

Is homeschooling common in that culture? She says in their culture homeschooling is common and that�s why she thinks she needs to rescue the 19 year old from her adoptive not-dad. Or something.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 21:51

Peaceful Anarchy: Sep 18, 2005; sXe
I am the math man.

Antivehicular posted:

Okay, never mind, I missed the part where she never told the new husband anything that was happening, so she had like 14 drinks and vanished? What the gently caress, lady.

Wait, so when she says "my husband and I did not speak the entire night" she means to each other rather than that they didn't get to make speeches? And when she says "and my spouse thinks that my anger is due to not having sex on the wedding night." She means "my husband doesn't know why I'm angry and assumes it's because he was too drunk to have sex" rather than "my husband thinks having sex would have fixed things?" Because if that's the case it's even more amazing.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:02

Pinecone Sample: Oct 12, 2010; THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420

Actually re-reading it, she only says spouse is very Catholic, does not mention it being her family's background.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:03

Antivehicular: Dec 30, 2011; I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

Peaceful Anarchy posted:

Wait, so when she says "my husband and I did not speak the entire night" she means to each other rather than that they didn't get to make speeches? And when she says "and my spouse thinks that my anger is due to not having sex on the wedding night." She means "my husband doesn't know why I'm angry and assumes it's because he was too drunk to have sex" rather than "my husband thinks having sex would have fixed things?" Because if that's the case it's even more amazing.

I... I think so? Can the Catholic Church issue some kind of annulment that revokes your ability to get marriage licenses?

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:04

Pinecone Sample: Oct 12, 2010; THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420

Peaceful Anarchy posted:

Wait, so when she says "my husband and I did not speak the entire night" she means to each other rather than that they didn't get to make speeches? And when she says "and my spouse thinks that my anger is due to not having sex on the wedding night." She means "my husband doesn't know why I'm angry and assumes it's because he was too drunk to have sex" rather than "my husband thinks having sex would have fixed things?" Because if that's the case it's even more amazing.

Yes, she was angry that he was doing shots with his cousins while she was comforting her mother, and her belief is that he should have been there saying," what can I do to help?"

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:05

Cough Drop The Beat: Jan 22, 2012; by Lowtax

MasBrillante posted:

I (24 F) have been cheating on my boyfriend (23 M) with another man (24 M) whom I have never met for over a year now. Should I risk ending my relationship for the other guy?

This one is just, uh, so confusing. Yes, I will leave my incredibly good boyfriend who is a little boring in bed for some random rear end likely catfish Tinder stranger who I know zero about and have never met before.

It's not even like they dated once or twice and drifted apart before she met her boyfriend or some such. She has never met this weirdo before.

Cough Drop The Beat fucked around with this message at 22:12 on Jul 6, 2019

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:07

Pinecone Sample: Oct 12, 2010; THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420

My [27m] girlfriend [25f] tried selling me her nudes

quote:

I don’t even know where to begin

We’ve haven’t had sex since Valentine’s Day, and when we did she literally told me “let’s get this over with” things are rocky but most days we get along great. She got drunk a bar last week and texted me trying to sell me her nudes, I didn’t respond but this whole time I’m wondering if I’m an rear end in a top hat for thinking she’s sold her nudes to other people while we were dating.

So I tried to talk to her about and she blew up at me accusing me of cheating with an old ex that had texted me months earlier asking to get a cup of coffee and catch up. It goes like this and eventually she said that 85 percent of her wants to break up but 15 percent is holding on to the fact that I might break down one day and admit everything to her. I can swear on everything I am I’ve never cheated on this woman. We said our last goodbye or what I thought were our last goodbyes, told her how much she’s changed as a person.

Fast forward to today. I just can’t shake the feeling she’s cheating on me, my reasoning is that if she honestly believes I’m cheating on her it wouldn’t be that big of deal for her to “get revenge”. I tried telling her how I felt, and she blocked me and told me I was harassing her and that she was on her way to the one concert she could afford all year and that I was being unfair to her, that’s how we left it. I’m just so lost and my head is spinning, am I being manipulated? Is there anything worth saving in this relationship at all? I feel so embarrassed.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:10

Traxis: Jul 2, 2006

Formatting is OP's

Family court judge forced me to answer question relating to EMISSION OF MY SEED - england??

quote:

Wife falsely accused me of cheating and sleeping with my secretary. FIRSTLY, i will explain the FULL story.

Wife can be argumentative and irritating, gets on my nerves sometimes. does my head in cant stand her to be honest. when i work i get my head sorted.

secondly, I have KIDS so WHY WOULD I CHEAT????????? why would i do that to my children??

my secretary flat got flooded because of her upstairs neighbour so she couldnt sleep anywhere so I OFFERED her to stay around mine.

my wife came back later in the morning, i thought she was staying over at my in-laws but anyways long story short she got it all wrong but she wasnt having it. she asked whose clothes they were and then ASSUMED the worst in me.

my kids INNOCENTLY said another woman came over but she took it to mean I cheated on her.

2 months later, she files for petition of divorce. family court session starts, I ask my secretary to be a witness but she refused, said she didnt want to get involved fair enough.

anyways, her solicitor asks me if I EMITTED SEED. what was meant by that was whether I released my bodily fluid into her. I refused to answer it because thats discusting out of order and private but the judge said i had to answer it.

i had to answer truthfully so i did. i didnt want to answer it but i was forced to.

anyway, judge said it wasn't adultery so the divorce petition failed. IF SHE WANTED A DIVORCE, ID BE HAPPY BUT TO CLAIM I CHEATED IS OUT OF ORDER AND WRONG!

was this judge acting unreasonably??? i did not represent myself with a solicitor.

lmao

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:11

MasBrillante: Dec 3, 2005; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

I will NOT discuss the PRIVATE DETAILS of this DISCUSTING act that I totally did NOT do.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:16

Pinecone Sample: Oct 12, 2010; THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420

I'm gonna start incorporating all-caps "EMITTED SEED" in my sexting

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:17

DemoneeHo: Nov 9, 2017; Come on hee-ho, just give us 300 more macca

Peaceful Anarchy posted:

Wait, so when she says "my husband and I did not speak the entire night" she means to each other rather than that they didn't get to make speeches? And when she says "and my spouse thinks that my anger is due to not having sex on the wedding night." She means "my husband doesn't know why I'm angry and assumes it's because he was too drunk to have sex" rather than "my husband thinks having sex would have fixed things?" Because if that's the case it's even more amazing.

Wait what?

Oh man, you're right. I thought husband was a dingus for not getting sex that night when chaos reigned at the wedding. But no, he thinks wife is mad for not getting sex that night.

loving run dude. Don't let your catholic guilt trap you into this hot mess of a marriage.

Traxis posted:

Formatting is OP's

Family court judge forced me to answer question relating to EMISSION OF MY SEED - england??

lmao

Can i EMIT MY SEED all over this post?

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:22

Peaceful Anarchy: Sep 18, 2005; sXe
I am the math man.

Cough Drop The Beat posted:

This one is just, uh, so confusing. Yes, I will leave my incredibly good boyfriend who is a little boring in bed for some random rear end likely catfish Tinder stranger who I know zero about and have never met before.

It's not even like they dated once or twice and drifted apart before she met her boyfriend or some such. She has never met this weirdo before.

She has never even seen a picture. He(?) is such a good catfisher that not even a fake picture was needed, just a dog pic.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:23

Pinecone Sample: Oct 12, 2010; THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420

So you don’t/didn’t want an open relationship?

quote:

So I recently found a reply that my ex boyfriend wrote about how much he hated our open relationship and how taxing it was for him, how it hurt his self esteem, and how unhappy he was with me etc.

I was so hurt when I found it that I felt sick but I wanted to make that hurt constructive somehow.

So I have some advice of my own for people whose significant other is asking for an open relationship that they’re not interested in.

Say no.

If my ex had said that he wasn’t comfortable with it and didn’t want to be in an open relationship and didn’t want to share me with anyone. I would have respected that.

I for one wanted an open relationship because I didn’t feel appreciated in the relationship even as I was in love. I never just wanted to cheat. I just wanted to feel wanted and I didn’t.

Not all desires for open relationships come from this and I can only speak for myself, but maybe you should try finding whatever spark you’ve lost and rekindling it.

It's just that easy!

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:27

MasBrillante: Dec 3, 2005; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

We have no idea what the husband thinks because she stopped talking to him some time during the wedding and hasn�t talked to him since, while growing increasingly infuriated that he doesn�t get why. He passed out before she Ubered to the ER and she says they didn�t talk before she �ghosted him� (her words) for two days. Then she �didn�t have time to talk� during the four hours before she left again on a business trip. By �did not consummate our marriage for three weeks� she means �did not talk to my husband for three weeks� lol.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:29

snergle: Aug 3, 2013; A kind little mouse!

therobit posted:

Maybe he can get an annulment from the church.

he can thats actually the "good" reason to get an annulment from the catholic church. the main one that happens is im sorry im bad at marriage give me another chance.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:33

QuarkJets: Sep 8, 2008

Traxis posted:

Formatting is OP's

Family court judge forced me to answer question relating to EMISSION OF MY SEED - england??

lmao

So does this mean that in England it's not adultery until a man ejaculates on or in something?

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:35

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

i dunno. could also be a judge trying to be more clinical than "yo, you gently caress her?". google it i guess

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:38

Pinecone Sample: Oct 12, 2010; THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420

Found out my boyfriend is following someone on Instagram think that I won’t find out

quote:

I found out that my boyfriend is following Bella Delphine on instagram and it made me really upset because after I had my baby and was still recovering from giving birth he was very vocal about jacking off to Instagram cam girls and it made me feel like complete poo poo. I’m usually not a jealous person but I just had a baby and my self esteem was a wreck. Without me saying anything to him he promised me that he wasn’t going to do that anymore and that he wouldn’t want to make me upset. (His words , not mine) Fast forward to a year later, we don’t follow each other on Instagram but I found out he follows Bella Delphine on ig. It made really upset because he’s doing it behind my back thinking that I’m not going to find out. Should I confront him ? He broke his promise to me. I know it’s social media and people are going to think I am overreacting but it hurts that he can’t even keep a simple promise to me.

quote:

I keep wondering if he’s paying for her Patreon. I feel like that would be cheating.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 22:48

Antivehicular: Dec 30, 2011; I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

Pinecone Sample posted:

Found out my boyfriend is following someone on Instagram think that I won’t find out

Isn't Belle Delphine the IG girl who's gone viral lately for selling her bathwater/creating a troll Pornhub/generally loving with her extremely sad fanbase? Really great choice this dude made.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 23:29

The Moon Monster: Dec 30, 2005

I think Belle Delphine must have paid a stealth marketing company to canvas SA or something because I've gone from never having heard of her to seeing her mentioned every 5 minutes this afternoon.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 23:35

MasBrillante: Dec 3, 2005; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

The Moon Monster posted:

I think Belle Delphine must have paid a stealth marketing company to canvas SA or something because I've gone from never having heard of her to seeing her mentioned every 5 minutes this afternoon.

Agreed.

# ? Jul 6, 2019 23:35

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# ? Jun 3, 2024 17:55

QuarkJets: Sep 8, 2008

The Moon Monster posted:

I think Belle Delphine must have paid a stealth marketing company to canvas SA or something because I've gone from never having heard of her to seeing her mentioned every 5 minutes this afternoon.

Not just SA, I'm seeing a lot of coverage in various pockets of the internet. I think the bathwater thing became viral organically because it's so stupid and sad

# ? Jul 6, 2019 23:43

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